“Quit it,” admonished Yonghwa while they were sitting inside their class for History.

Sighing, Hongki sighed and shifted his eyes from Jonghun to his notebook. He has repeatedly told himself that he would leave the vampire alone and he did, in fact, a very good job except that his eyes couldn’t help but wander toward Jonghun’s direction whenever it’s got the chance.

“You were staring at him for a full minute and you do know he dislikes it, don’t you?” Yonghwa asked quietly without looking at Hongki, hands furiously taking notes while their teacher continued droning about the History of the Vampire Civilization.

“It was ten years ago since the Black Rose happened and aren’t we glad that the ending was so happy?” asked their new History professor who was substituting Mister Kang temporarily.

Dropping his pen on the table, Hongki’s eyes moved to their new professor and his fists clenched. The man standing on the platform was the man who took away his memories. It didn’t take long for him to know what this man is capable of.

Song Seunghyun. Born to an aristocratic family. Looks 21 years old in human age, his vampire age unknown but predicted to be around 40 years. One of the twelve elite members of the Coven—a powerful group of soldiers gifted with rare talents. His ability—to wipe and alter a person’s memory.

Thanks to Yonghwa he got to know all the details about the vampire’s life. It also didn’t take too long for Hongki to find out that Yonghwa is fascinated with vampires. Ask the boy anything and he’ll most likely know the answer.

He glanced sideways at Yonghwa who was eagerly listening to Song Seunghyun and then to Jonghun who was yawning while his lean hands tap noisily on the table.

Hongki smiled a little. It was Jonghun’s habit to tap his fingers on some hard surface when he’s bored. It rarely happens when they’re together but when Hongki starts bragging about something, the vampire would immediately tap on something and Hongki would know Jonghun’s bored.

His smile grew wider when he noticed Song Seunghyun glance irritatingly at Jonghun’s fingers but the latter didn’t stop and continued.

He’s always so stubborn, Hongki thought and then his smile waned. Why am I smiling? It’s not like he remembers me.

Lowering his gaze to his notebook, Hongki sadly remembered the day they both lost their memories. Heechul came to the classroom and talked to him. Details of what they talked about were still vague but he remembered Jonghun entering the room and throwing the older vampire to the wall. Kim Heechul didn’t back down and immobilized Jonghun. It was his, Heechul’s, ability to freeze people, making them unable to move a single limb. After that, Song Seunghyun came from nowhere and stared at Jonghun’s eyes, flinching a bit, Hongki remembered, when Jonghun stared at Seunghyun with eyes full of anger and resentment. He can still remember Seunghyun’s words:

“Forget it,” the vampire had said, his slim manicured fingers grasping at Jonghun’s silky black hair. “Forget him.”

After those words, Jonghun fainted, Kim Heechul quick enough to catch his body. Hongki recalled himself feeling anger when he saw how Heechul’s arms were wrapped tightly around Jonghun’s lean waist as if it’s normal.  Song Seunghyun then kneeled before Hongki and smiled brightly before saying almost the same words he whispered to Jonghun.

“Forget him,” Seunghyun whispered, his brown eyes almost pleading. “I’m sorry Hongki, but you must sleep. It’s for the best. Both your memories will return when you both learn to forgive.”

His hand that were grasping on his notebook tightened at the memory of Seunghyun’s words. For the best huh? Hongki thought bitterly, his eyes shifting toward Seunghyun, unflinching when he saw the vampire staring back at him, a small sad smile on his lips.

Although he loathes the very thought of being helpless in front of these vampires, he also admitted to himself that it was also the best for them, for him and Jonghun. Even though he recovered his memories back, a part of him wants it erased again. Because the very thought of Jonghun not remembering him was almost as painful as his family’s death. It is as if he lost a part of him he may never bring back.

But in a way, he was relieved that Jonghun has no recollection of him. When Heechul had told him the first time Jonghun tried killing himself, Hongki wanted to curl up and cry. He did it to Jonghun. It was his fault that Jonghun tried killing himself for more than ten times. He put all the blame on his childhood friend when he was the one who lacked trust. He didn’t even give Jonghun the time to explain himself and ran away instead, too much of a coward to face the situation then.

So a part of him was relieved knowing that Jonghun couldn’t remember him. It was too much for Jonghun. Though vampires were generally strong, one couldn’t deny that each of them also has weaknesses. Hongki could bear the fact that his childhood friend has no memories of him as long as he would see that smile on his beautiful face again. After all, he was the one who brought misery to Jonghun’s life. Seunghyun was right. It’s for the best.

“That’s all for today, I’d bet you’re all hurrying to go to your dorms and sleep,” teased Seunghyun before starting to pack his things.

Hongki rose from his seat too and carelessly tossed his notebook and pen inside his bag. He then carried it on his back and was about to walk to the door when Yonghwa suddenly grabbed his arm.

“Where are you going? We still have class,” the boy reminded, looking at him curiously, lips pouted like a child.

“But I want to—“

He was interrupted when Goo Hara suddenly appeared to his side, looking up at him with her bright auburn eyes. “Can I talk to you for a second?” the vampire asked, glancing sideways at Yonghwa who nodded, before dragging his arm.

“Ouch!” Hongki complained when Hara shoved him against the next classroom’s wall.

“What are you doing?” asked Hara, her auburn eyes hinting a bit of crimson beneath them, her lovely face remained stunning despite the frown marring her forehead. “Why aren’t you talking to Jonghun?” she continued.

Brushing off Hara’s hand, Hongki massaged his arm and glowered at the girl. “It’s true, isn’t it? It’s for the best,” he replied.

“The best?” Hara spat. “How can it be the best?”

Rolling his eyes, Hongki was about to make a sharp retort when his eyes fell on the face just outside the classroom they are in. He breathed in as he stared at Jonghun’s smiling face, thinking it had been long since he had seen that smile.

He had always thought Jonghun’s smile was beautiful, but today it was breathtaking. He scoffed at himself inwardly when he thought that it was probably because Jonghun doesn’t have to worry about stupid Hongki’s feelings.

His eyes shifted to the tall vampire beside Jonghun and was wondering why the vampire wore such a worried expression on his small, handsome face when Jonghun is obviously enjoying himself.

“See that?” asked Hara, standing beside him, staring at Jonghun’s laughing face. “I never saw him laugh like that.”

Turning his head to Hara, Hongki scowled. “Then why are you pestering me?”

“That smile that Jonghun is wearing now, is not real,” Hara said, her auburn eyes turning darker as she continued to gaze at Jonghun. “I prefer seeing him frown and emotionless than have that fake smile on his face.”

Snorting, Hongki picked up his bag which he dropped when Hara shoved him against the wall. “Isn’t it at least a little better? He is smiling.”

“So it’s okay?” Hara asked. “It’s okay if he doesn’t recall meeting you? Talking to you? Being your friend?” Shifting her eyes to Hongki, Hara frowned when she saw him flinch. “How long do you think that smile of his would last? A year? A month? A week?” The vampire girl’s auburn eyes turned into a dark red. “I know he was lonely for ten years but I also know that if you come back to being his friend, that ten year gap would be forgotten. Isn’t that a better solution? Do you think I enjoy watching my friend being controlled?”

Hongki’s nose flared. “I’d rather see his smile than see him suffer.”

“See him suffer? You haven’t even seen him suffer!” Hara accused, her dark red eyes turning into a bright crimson. “When I was thirteen, my father told me to take care of a certain young boy who belongs to a prestigious family. I was angry, mad even, at the thought of nursing some brat,” Hara stated, the fury in her eyes burning. “But being an obedient child, I went to his house, and do you know how I first saw him? He was going to hang himself up!”

Hongki cringed inwardly and averted his eyes from Hara’s teary-eyed ones.

Continuing, Hara smiled bitterly to herself. “It wasn’t the worst, you know. The worst thing was that when I entered, he was not shocked in the least bit and stared at me with his dark eyes void of any emotion. I would have thought it was just his way of having fun but,” A sob escaped Hara’s lips while tears flowed to her cheeks. “But his face was resigned. He gave up. He thinks he has nothing to lose.” Hara stared up at Hongki and grabbed the collar of his shirt, forcing him to look straight into her bloodshot eyes. “Do you know why?” Her hands on his clothes tightened. “Because he’s lost you! And now he’s lost you again but you know what’s worst? You don’t even care you bastard!”

Hongki brushed off Hara’s hands rudely and looked away. “Of course I care. I want to talk to him,” he said quietly. “I want to ask him why was he in the forest that day. Ask him what happened. Ask him how he lived his life in the last ten years.” He snapped his eyes to Hara. “But I can’t wipe that smile on his face again! I did it ten years ago, why the hell would I do it again?” he yelled.

Eyes reverting back to auburn, Hara calmed herself and gazed down at her feet. “I know you both suffered,” she whispered. “But you will not wipe that smile on his face when you accept him back. You will make it brighter, Lee Hongki.”

“You will make it brighter, Lee Hongki”

Sighing, Hongki sat up from lying down on the football field and stared at the group of humans playing baseball at the other side of the field. They were smiling at each other and laughing while playing. It used to be that way, Hongki thought. He and Jonghun would always play although they always seem to be hiding.

A smile formed on his lips when he recalled Jonghun saying that they were hiding from someone evil and must protect their friendship. They were always so mischievous and foolish back then. One moment they are playing happily, the next, they are tumbling on the ground, wrestling against each other. Back then he used to think he could win against Jonghun. When he grew old, he realized how naïve he was.

He lied down on the grass again and stared up at the bright blue sky. He used to ask Jonghun why the color of the sky was blue. But Jonghun would always say, “Don’t ask me, I’m not God.”

Of course you’re not God. If you were, things would be different.

He thought back to what Song Seunghyun said to Jonghun that day they lost their memories. The vampire had whispered that Jonghun’s memories would only come back when Hongki has forgiven himself.

It confused Hongki at first but, when he found out that Jonghun didn’t kill his family, he slid down the floor and begged to be killed. Jonghun then kneeled before him asking him to stop blaming himself—which he didn’t heed. So it was no wonder why it was the condition Song Seunghyun asked for. He probably doesn’t want his friend to suffer half-assed friendship from Hongki anymore.

Every time Hongki remembers that, it makes him think that Seunghyun did that to alleviate all their troubles and start anew.

But it was not easy. Jonghun’s memories would return when Hongki starts forgiving himself. The problem is, Hongki doesn’t want to stop blaming himself. After all, it was his entire fault that everything turned out this way. He was the one who made the damage. He has to pay.

“What are you doing here?”

Hongki froze at the voice. It was the voice he had always admired. It was emotionless and yet it held softness. It was beautiful. It belongs to Jonghun.

Sitting up, Hongki looked up at Jonghun’s frowning face, staring down at him with his eyes curious.

“I asked you a question, human,” said Jonghun. “Didn’t you know that this is my secret place?”

A smiled crept into Hongki’s lips. He remembered their very first meeting. He was in the stream that was his hiding place and playing with the water while Jonghun was sitting atop a rock, staring at him expressionlessly. He asked the same question to Jonghun back then.

“What are you smiling at? You’re weird,” Jonghun stated before sitting beside him on the field. “But at least you’re not boring.”

The smile on Hongki’s face grew wider. Did you know, Jonghun? You said the same thing to me before.

Staring at Jonghun’s profile, Hongki suddenly want to talk to Jonghun the way they used to. He missed their usual banter. And then that urge to bring back Jonghun’s memories crept into Hongki’s heart.

I’ll bring you back Jonghun. And I will make that smile of yours brighter.

~8~

Author's Note:

Hi! I'm sorry for posting this late. Well, truth is, I posted it on Monday but I forgot to remove the check on the box saying, 'hide chapter'. Stupid, right? Anyway, here it is. Hope you'll like it. Or not. Please continue reading to the next chapter, thank you!