As the dramatic evenings passed, came the quiet nights. It filled Jongin's mind with loud thoughts, that wouldn't stop. They kept circling around, keeping him awake. His eyes wouldn't shut, he couldn't fall asleep. The thought of giving up.. it wasn't for him. It wasn't right. But it was too much. Giving up wasn't the right choice, but he wanted to. There it came. The noise. The smacking and the screaming. Even loud thoughts wouldn't conceal what happened out of the door. How heartbreaking it was. But it wasn't loud enough to make someone run to them, make them be their saviour. He wasn't going to get away from here, wasn't he? It made him wonder what kind of future he had. It made him imagine things that weren't possible. He wasn't going to get to a new level. He was staying here; on the ground it was comfortable, it was nice. It was familiar and red. Filled with blood but it was home. Eyes closed it wasn't that bad. He could say to himself that it was a dream, it was the work of his mind. It wasn't true.

On the other side of the building, the first floor on the right side didn't know anything. That was a peaceful place. Old ladies walked slowly, everything reminded from their past lovers and dreams. They looked at young men with hope in their eyes, seeing the past. And the young men tried to compete with life and its fast pace, trying to compete in the hope of winning something better. It was the same case with Baekhyun; every day he bought the lottery ticket and hoped maybe one day, that one day he will be the winner like others, like the person he envied. He wanted to be that person. Who took his place. He was getting a new start. This was the day. Baekhyun took his third lottery ticket from his pocket as the midnight passed and the night was getting darker. This was the hour when he changed his life. Baekhyun raised his hand and the ticket, holding it in the air.

“This --” He announced dramatically, hopeful smile on his face as Luhan opened the door for him. “This is the night when I become rich and every guy I meet bends over the table and--” “Yes, of course, that's the case.” The sarcastic, amused voice of Luhan reached Baekhyun and he felt like kicking him as he stepped inside the apartment which had so many books that it felt like a library. There were so many Chinese books about herbs, the literature and the long history of that big, mysterious country. At least Luhan thought so, Baekhyun was more superficial. He didn't thought what it meant when someone gave him that, meaningful look. He thought was it enough hard to get when he didn't call for 3 days. Luhan shook his head when the tipsy younger one stepped inside the apartment and Luhan shut the door. “Hyung, you should really try this drink, it's called The Laser.” Baekhyun's voice was jumping from the one octave to another, it was little bit hoarse.

Luhan didn't say a word but passed the messy mirror in the hallway. It was dirty and it had lipstick on it. It was there when Luhan moved in. He never asked about it cause he felt like it was too private. But Luhan always wondered what was Baekhyun's life like. Luhan knew he dated girls in the past and he created crazy fantasies about it. Maybe Baekhyun was Luhan's dirty, experienced friend who showed the world and how it was breaking down slowly and the people who lived in it did the same. When he moved in, he never knew the world could be like this. The way Baekhyun lived and the way Luhan saw it was toxic, it brought people in it and locked them there. That what happened to Luhan. He'll be forever in this dark world filled with alcohol and loud music, restless nights and people who shared the same bed then disappearing in the world.

“I don't wan--” “Coward~ Such a , hyung, man up. Your blond hair and big eyes doesn't make you a girl.” Baekhyun's words made Luhan surprised. His eyes was on Baekhyun when he sat down on the floor, ready to scratch that lottery ticket. He ignored the other's words, putting them behind. That moment was gone. It had disappeared and Baekhyun wouldn't never remember it. So wouldn't Luhan either. “I'm decent..” He mumbled and unfortunately Baekhyun heard it. He had a grin on his face. “Oh come on! Don't you wanna go out, it's sunny and hot – ah, the tension. You drink a bit, you wink couple times, maybe dance with relaxed yet intimate music and then you hold his hand --” Baekhyun stood up and grinned, taking Luhan's hand and pulled him closer. “Then you mumble a little, you feel the hotness and you both know it's time to.. open the doors you know?” Baekhyun let his hand trail on Luhan's cheek gently, Luhan blinking his eyes in confusion. “And.. when you open the door in the morning, the sun shines and you know it's over.” Then he let go of Luhan's hand and turned his back on him, taking the lottery ticket to his hand.

Luhan still stood there and looked at Baekhyun, his mouth open. How could he be so care-free and superficial? How he could do that? Luhan believed in love at first sight, seeing the one and feeling the attraction and it stays there forever. He was the opposite of Baekhyun, yet he felt he was like the guy from the movies where girls feel that they're different and dangerous; they have bikes and they take you to places you've never been before. The feeling of being free. But Luhan was locked down by himself, by his own will. “No.. No I don't want to do that,” Luhan commented, trying to keep the shakiness out of his voice, hoping Baekhyun wouldn't have seen his weak spot right there. He didn't want to be weak in front of him.