well you only need the light when it’s burning low 
only miss the sun when it starts to snow 
only know you love [him] when you let [him] go 
only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low 
only hate the road when you’re missing home 
only know you love [him] when you let [him] go 

January 1st, 2016: Korea, Seoul. 

"You don't seem to understand," Tao says stubbornly as he sips idly at his -tailed drink, too sweet,  the tall model looking guy beside him pays no heed to his distressed warning singals, and as he has been doing for that last 34 minutes and 33 seconds, continues flirting one-sidely with Tao.  

"Understand what?" The model says, "what's there too say? Obviously your boyfriend isn't a very good lover if you're here, alone."  

Tao sighs, a long vexed one, "he is here, that's what I've been saying my friend Xiumin dragged him ---" 

The model presses a finger to his lips, letting out a disgusting cooing sound Tao assumes was actually supposed to soothe him.  

"Um," Tao says mannerly (his patience is running immensely thin;) "you're touching me. Please don't."  

"Love," the guy says (the stench of alcohol on his tongue) and his face is way too close,  "let's just forget about your boyfriend and," 

"And not do anything?" Kris says, voice thick and weaned thin as it can go, Tao finally puts down his drink and leans his head back, "Tao who is this?" 

"I'm not sure" Tao says matter-of-factly, "but he's annoying." 

"Shoo," Kris hisses, hands on the models shoulders, "get going."  

When the possible alcoholic is finally gone (good riddance), Kris turns sharply, eyes accusing as he crosses his arms, Tao refrains from rolling his eyes at him.  

"I didn't do anything with him, calm down." 

"Why did you let him hit on you?" 

"I didn't," Tao sighs, "he wouldn't leave me alone. Can we go? Idols shouldn't be at places like this." 

"Your not an idol" Kris points out with a raised eyebrow. 

Tao snorts, "you are, though."  

 ∞

March 5th, 2011: China, Qingdao. 

"This can't be happening," Tao groans, hand covering his face as he slowly slides it down to let a loud groan erupt from his lips, "Kris, no."  

"Shut up" Kris laughs, fingers nimbly pressing the tips into his hips, "Luhan promised he'd give me fifty if I did this." 

"Did you know," Tao hisses under his breath, kicking away a piece of trash as he peers over Kris' shoulder to look at the line-up, "we aren't 18."  

"Shocking" is the dull reply. 

"And," Tao adds, voice high and nervous, "this is a --- a, gay bar. Kris, have you lost it?"  

"Calm down" Kris grunts, chin on top of Tao's head as they both wait in line to get into the bar, "I'm getting you something Gucci as a present, I need this money."  

"I’m sorry I'm so expensive," the schools known Gucci lover huffs, arms crossed over his chest as he eyes an odd pair of fat homoual men walking by them, "if you want a less expensive friend, please befriend Sehun more intimately." 

Kris wrinkles his nose at that, "that's just gross." 

"Which part?" 

"Shut up."  

 ∞

They do get into the club, not so surprisingly, and Tao hates every moment of it.  

People are grinding much to roughly against his sides, and Kris doesn't look to be enjoying himself, actually, he looks more like he's going to slaughter the guy that had plastered himself right onto his left arm, hips against Kris' hips. 

Bubbling jealousy tipping over the cup, Tao sulks in a corner. No he doesn't get up and say: back off you ing , cause really, the not so innocent thoughts of his aren't really all that straight too. So, he's just as guilty as the grinding up on Kris. Kind of.  

"Tao?" Someone says in this shocked way that leaves Tao turning his head slowly (too make sure it isn't someone he's really close to, or someone that'll start undeniable rumors). "Oh, it's you." 

"Baekhyun? Byun Baekhyun?" Tao grunts out, shocked. "Why -- why are you here?"  

"I could ask the same thing," Baekhyun laughs, "aren't you under age?" He says boldly, Tao snorts at that, grabbing a nearby drink that the bartender had handed him to drown down.  

"Kris," Tao says cocking a the hand holding his current drink over to the area where Kris is getting molested, "apparently looks over 18." 

"Shock" Baekhyun says plainly. "Should I buy you a drink?"  

Tao laughs, earnest and gracious to the proposal before snorting out, "Byun Baekhyun, are you flirting with me?" 

"Well, you are in a gay bar, and you aren't that bad looking. Though," tapping the bar as a silent way to get the bartenders attention before muttering; beer, thanks, before looking towards Tao, a careless smile on his lips, "I always pegged you in being in love with Kris, or something." 

Tao drinks, one, two gulps to this, slapping his cup against the table loudly before letting out a sincere sigh; it's the booze, he decides to pin as the excuse with his next words, "close enough to that, anyways."  

Baekhyun has a soft laugh, and Tao has always really liked Baekhyun's light laughter; it's airy and soft, something akin to feathers. Kris' laughter is more like bells, loud, unruly things that shake his inner core with each ring erupting into the air.  

"Thought so," Baekhyun whispers meekly, "am I being rejected before I even ask?"  

"No" Tao says idly "I'm just warning you." 

"Straightforward, I like" what happens next was however planned (even though Tao see's from the corner of his eyes how Kris' eyes widen incredibly) Baekhyun leans over, softly placing a flighty kiss on his lips before leaning away with a smug look in his eyes. "How about I, the responsible adult," (Tao snorts to that) "show you how to get someone to know they like you." 

Arching one of his plucked eyebrows, "by making him jealous?" 

"Something like that," Baekhun says with a greasy smirk.  

∞

January 1st, 2016: Korea, Seoul. 

"I thought you said you weren't going to see me anymore." It's a soft tone, something Tao rarely uses, he hates to seem gentle and soft-hearted, people tend to want to step all over his kindness when they spot it. Kris, sadly, is one of those people. 

"Did I?" Kris says off-handily, and Tao grits his teeth together letting out an annoyed growl. 

Selfish. Kris has, and always will be, the most selfish person he knows. "I'm dating Sehun, you know that." 

"Are you?" Kris grits out, his good-natured personality disappearing with his selfless acts he displays to his loving and caring fans, "Tao," he breathes out heavily, "I know you're mad but this is no reason to ---" 

"Kris," Tao cuts off, looking towards the particularly cold night (which is odd, even in Korea) but this New Years has been anything but joyful. "I'm 28, your, 28 and you're getting married in 4 months, it's time you stop thinking you have the right to control me ---" 

"You know she's a cover-up," Kris says desperately, grabbing Tao's wrists to pull their bodies together, "why are you pushing me away? I know you still love me."  

"Brave words" Tao hisses, "for someone who can't even remember my favourite book."  

When Tao does finally pull away (which took a bit more time than he's willing to admit) the screen door is almost closed, he almost gets away from this secret relationship he's been keeping with Kris for eight tiring years and --- 

"Gone Girl" Kris whispers almost helplessly, "your favourite book is Gone Girl."  

The screen door is shut, but not with Tao on the other side, almost bitterly he drags his feet back in front of Kris. "I hate you," he says mournfully, "I really ing hate you." 

Kris laughs and kisses him anyways.  

∞

December 23rd, 2016: Korea, Seoul. 

"You know" Kris says off-handily when they're looking at peculiar nit-knacks in a small dainty shop at the end of town, looking for Christmas presents for each other last minute. "You have this bad tendency to make me jealous," 

It's always been like that, Tao thinks apathetically, "Oh, really now?" 

"Yes" Kris grunts, "stop it." 

"No" Tao laughs, "I don't do it on purpose, so how am I supposed to just stop doing it?"  

"Honestly" Kris sighs, "sometimes I feel like I've been doing this little game with you for centuries."  

Something akin to fear the inside of Tao's veins, and he pauses, Kris looking at him with furrowed brows. "Tao?" 

"No," Tao laughs nervously, "couldn't be." 

A/N: NOOOOOO

ARE YOU, CONFUSED, YET?

lET ME HEAR YOU THOUGHTS.

Next chapter will be set in Russia, 1901. 

Oh God. Hot Russian farmer boys. , ensure.(No, not really, well, maybe).