Chapter 1 – Oh Sehun’s Letter

Sehun faces a blank paper in front of him. It’s midnight and Sehun only wants to pour out all the feelings he felt recently. Those are stuck on his mind and he only wants to let it out. He can’t tell any members about this. He’s afraid his fellow members won’t accept this and also he doesn’t want to be teased later. So, he will just write a letter. A letter for someone. A letter that won’t ever be sent.

.::.

Dear Minseok hyung,

Today a fan asked me whether I’m close with you or not. I guess she had no idea, right? Yeah, even though it was some years ago, to me those are still remain precious memories I will never forget.

Hyung, do you remember?

Do you remember those times when we were still together? Do you remember those times when I was the only one you see? Do you remember those times when we sneaked out together after all tiring practices and we ate in Shin ahjumma’s ddeokbokki shop? Those memories are vivid in my mind. Those memories are carved on my heart.

Hyung, our first meeting might not be so memorable. I can’t really recall it. It was just like that; we met from practices to practices. But I can’t forget our meeting in that bubble tea shop near SM building. That was the first time you talked to me. You treated me because you knew I’m younger. I remember you ordered French Vanilla Coffee and I thought you were so manly and mature because you chose coffee over milk tea. And I shyly ordered Chocolate Pearl Milk Tea. Since then you always brought me there after a tiring dance class.

I didn’t know how we became closer and you always sticked to me. Not that I mind. Previously I only befriended with other trainees around my age, so did you. But then you introduced me to other older trainees, other more famous trainees, and those trainees with excellent skills. You helped me a lot to socialize even though you were actually not that social butterfly. But hey, they knew you! I guess that was because you were always be so sincere and nice that people wanted to be your friends. You still are, hyung.

Hyung, one thing I can’t ever forget. That time in the dance practice room. When I was confessing my love. I didn’t know how or why but I only knew that I loved you. Well, I still do. ^^

I was happy that we had mutual feeling. And we shared our first kiss...

Although after that we weren’t as close as before, yet I couldn’t help but felt really when you stole glances in every practice classes we had together, Minseok hyung.

Hyung, have I thanked you?

You’re the one who made me like how I am right now. You’re the one who always told me to never give up, who told me to be confident with myself, with all I have.

When the times I wanted to give up on my dreams, you were always there to support me, to give me hands, to make me stand up again.

Sometimes you told me that you’re the one who felt less confidence because you were lack of many things. But no, hyung! You were perfect. You are perfect.

You said that we can make it. We would be debuted in one group together.

Thank you, Kim Minseok.

Hyungie...

I never know the real reason why you ignored me. You said you would be busy with more practices since the rumor that said our company would debut a new boy group. You said that I had to work harder, practice more too so we could be called to the new group. I did as you said, but in the end you still wanted us to end. Why? Is because I was close with... Luhan hyung? It’s not it, right? You’re the one told me I had to socialize and you were happy that I did that well. So, why?? :(

Okay, you can ignore that. (but I still want to know!)

But hey, I was so happy when you came in to that room. You smiled at me and your eyes as if telling me “Sehun-ah, see! We made it!” Yeah, hyung. We made it. And I think you should know that I didn’t like when the company set me to be in K. I was originally in M with you!

Hyung, I wasn’t imagining things right when I saw your sorrowful face? Because you weren’t with me? Tell me, hyung, since I never like being far away from you.

Kim Minseok, I miss you!!!

So so so much!

You were often in China, and when you were here we never talked. Sure, we talked, but only casual conversation. You never really talked to me like... like how we used to be in the past.

I know. How we were in the past, we can’t go back to it anymore. Yet still I want to be close to you.

Because I still love you, Minseokie.

You don’t love me anymore, right hyung?

.::.

Sehun sighs as he folds his letter after rereading it again twice. He takes the letter and places it in his bag, he doesn’t want anyone to find out, not even his guardian or his roommate. He smiles remembering that tomorrow he will meet Minseok hyung and he needs his beauty sleep right now.

A/N 2: This is my first XiuHun fic~ tbh I'm a XiuHan shipper but can't help loving this pairing because.... cute~!! >__<

hm, you can expect me to write more XiuHun (or NO? hahaha) but anyways, this fandom need moarrrr xiuhun fics and moments ;__;