“This is not working anymore.” I glanced up at Minsoo aka CAP and nodded.

 

I knew eventually it would lead to this. I just didn’t know that it would happen this soon. Our relationship wasn’t working anymore. His tight schedule was drifting us apart and I knew ‘us’ couldn’t hold on any longer.

 

“I know.” I muttered and he tried to hold my hand but I quickly pulled my hands off the table. If we’re going to end this, I don’t want any type of contact because I know I would do anything even beg on my knees so he won’t leave me.

 

He just has that effect on me every time we touched, I always felt that electricity flowing through my body, and people said when you felt that. That means that person is your soul mate, so of course I would do anything to keep Minsoo around even if we’re hurting each other.

 

“Rae In.” he called out and I looked up at him. “I’m sorry.” He said and I felt remorse, regret and sorrow in his voice. I know he felt guilty but that fact didn’t make things better, it made everything more difficult. It makes me harder to let go and deep down I don’t want to let him go.

 

“I understand Minsoo. Our relationship is not heading anywhere at all.” I whisper but loud enough for him to hear me out. “Maybe this is the best for the both of us.” I said while playing with my nails. “I think I should leave.” I placed the napkin on the table and stood up.

 

Minsoo instantly stood up and approached me. I took my purse and coat on the couch before glancing at him and smiled bitterly. “I guess this is it, huh?” I tried to joke around but it obviously didn’t work out when I saw he looked at me with sympathy and pity.

 

“Anyway, I hope your new comeback will be a hit!” I tried to say as cheerful as I can but it ended up failing when my voice cracked at the end. He opened his arms for a hug and I shook my head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea, Minsoo.” I backed off from him and he looked down at the floor as if the floor was more interesting than me.

 

I went to the door and opened it leaving him there. “Bye Bang Minsoo.” I said as I closed the door, I felt my tears feel as I walked down the stairs. I put on my coat and started to walk away.

 

I hope you can be happy, baby...

 

I wiped my tears and went home. That night, I spent the whole night crying in my apartment. Regretting everything I did and did not do. Thinking about ‘what if’ and hitting myself for not trying hard to maintain our relationship.

 

I did try my best but I guess it’s not enough when he decided to break it off. I tossed to my left and saw our photo together at my side table. I took it and placed in on my heart.

 

I don’t think I can do this... I can’t...

 

 

 

**

 

Weeks go by and I was still a mess but Minsoo was doing good, no he was doing great. They just released their new song ‘I wanna love’ and I couldn’t help but look at him. He looked amazing in the video even with those long braids; he is still that Minsoo I met when I was 7 years old.

 

The one that rescued me from those boys bullying me. He was still Bang Minsoo to me even when the whole world sees him as CAP.

 

‘It’s time to move on, here we go Teen Top’

 

I listen to his line and smiled bitterly. He had move on already and here I am still as pathetic, wretched and weak as I can be. I looked around my apartment and our photos are still hanging on the wall, the teddy bears he brought me still on the couch. The flowers he sent were still alive in the vase. His clothes are still in the closet. Even his shoe is still on the shoe rack.

 

It’s like he’s living here. The right side of my bed still smelt like him, I always hugged his pillow and crying myself to sleep. Now I know there’s no way, I can forget about him. I’ve known him for years now and half of my life is him.

 

Today I was working in the office; my co-workers were looking at me like I’m a weird creature.  I did my job like normal but my expressions was nothing. Sometimes when I’m typing, I can felt my eyes watering but I always it up and continued.

 

My appetite has gone down and I only ate once a day. I have deep black eyes and my cheek was skinnier. Another day has passed and I was on my way home again. Sitting on the bench makes me remember the old days where Bang Minsoo is still Minsoo, when CAP doesn’t exist. When he was still mine.

 

My bus arrived and I got in quickly taking the forth seat to my left where we always sat together while holding hands, talking and filling each other with our life. I talked about college while he talked about his trainee days.

 

“CAP from Teen Top was seen strolling around Han River with Yubin from Wonder Girls.”

 

My head spun around to the TV and I felt my heart broke into gazillion pieces. Yubin? That’s his old crush during his trainee days. I kept looking at the screen even though I know I would end up hurting more.

 

“The two idols were seen getting cozy while walking hand in hand. Witness saw CAP whispering at Yubin’s ears. The two idols were reportedly had crush at each other, could they be the next couple announcing their relationship publicly?”

 

Then photos were shown and there are 4 pictures in total. Picture number 1, Minsoo was holding Yubin’s hand while walking around. 2^nd picture was Minsoo whispering something at Yubin’s. 3^rd picture was Yubin smiling and seen like blushing when Minsoo look at her. The 4^th picture, Minsoo was hugging her from back and that did it.

 

My tears fell and I didn’t even care if the whole bus looked at me but I let it out and I started crying. I quickly got off the bus and went to my apartment. Again that night I cried myself to sleep.

 

It’s seems like my life is a cycle. I wake up, cried, work, cried, eat, cried and sleep.

 

I thought I would feel numb, I thought that I would get sick of crying that I’ll feel nothing at all but no. I was still feeling. I was still crying. I was still hurting. But most of all, I was still caring. I was still missing. I was still loving him.

 

When will this stop?

 

 

 

**

 

[ CAP’s POV ]

 

“How was the date?” I slumped on the couch and glanced at Chunji who was eating pineapple. I swear after shooting that music video for ‘I wanna love’. He had been obsessed with pineapple and it’s getting creepier for me.

 

“It was fine. I guess.” I muttered and Chunji shot me his are-you-kidding-with-me looks. “CAP! You just went on a date with Yubin! Yubin from Wonder Girls and you said it was okay?! Are you insane?” Chunji dramatically muttered and I sighed.

 

“This is not working.” I said and then L.Joe sat next to me. “What do you mean?” Sooner, the boys are all in the living room waiting for my next feedback.

 

“I thought they say that a love scar can be healed by different person..” “So, your point is?” Ricky asked and I shook my head. “I still felt alone. I’m still hurting.” I said then I run my hands through my hair. “Maybe you still need her.” Niel said as he patted my shoulder.

 

I shook my head. “She won’t come back to me, not after what I’ve done. You should’ve seen her face, she was broken. She despise me, I know it.” I never felt this small before. I let go the only women that ever made me felt like a man.

 

“You’ll never know CAP Hyung. Maybe she’s still inlove with you?” Changjo said and Ricky nodded his head. “Yeah, at least try and meet her.” L.Joe added and I rested my elbow on my knees. “I’m afraid that she might move on. Maybe she’s with someone else right now. I know there’s a lot of guys by her side that like her.” I flinched just think about it.

 

“Maybe she’s falling out of love already.” I said remorsely and I stood up. “Anyway, I’ll just sleep this off.” I said as I walked to my room. I sat on my bed and flipped my phone. I scrolled down and glanced at her photos.

 

I still haven’t deleted any of it. I still kept everything that I got from her. Including the watch, earphone, phone charm and even my blanket was from her. I felt my tears forming around my eyes and look at her photo in my phone.

 

Have you move on, darling?

 

 What have you done Minsoo? You let her go for what? Now that you have lost her, now you want her back?

 

 

 

**

 

 

 

[ Your POV ]

 

“JYP Entertainment has confirmed the rumors about CAP & Yubin! They are dating each other!”

 

“Looks like we have another idol couple.”

 

“Will they last?”

 

“Another perfect couple who are not afraid to show their love.”

 

“We wished that the happy couple will last!”

 

 

 

I smiled bitterly and nodded my head.

 

Good luck, Minsoo. You’ve finally got your dream girl.

 

I thought as I went to my bathroom to wash myself. I need to get ready to for work and I needed to refreshed myself after crying all night long. As always, I took the bus, sat on the same seat and slowly make my way to my office.

 

My co-workers asked me if I was doing fine and I bluntly lied to him. “I’m fine, Hongbin.” I said and he nodded eventhrough he didn’t believe me. “Look Rae In-ah..” he called me and I looked at him. “Yeah?”

 

“Just don’t torture yourself. You always look beautiful with a smile.” He said and I smiled out of appreciation. “Thank you Hongbin-shii.” Then I made my way to the office. I sat on my chair and opened my drawer.

 

I saw Minsoo’s photo and I smiled. I traced my fingers along the jawlines of the pictures. “My Minsoo.” I said as I touched the lips of the photo. Then I closed my drawer and started reading the photocopy of one of the writers story.

 

My boss had told me to read the first 5 chapter and make my own review on it. I do as I was told and for a while I got my mind off Minsoo.

 

 

 

[ CAP’s POV ]

 

I entered the Kim’s Publishing company and made my way to the second floor quietly, thankfully no one saw me yet but I bet no one know me here since they are in their late 20’s and our fans are usually 13 until 19 years old.

 

I peek through the wall and saw Rae In, she had her eyes focus on her work and she never looked so cute in my entire life. The way her nose crinkled when she doesn’t like the story, the way her widen with a tint of awe when she read something romantic.

 

I was in awe watching her, she was doing fine, hell she was doing better than I was. I sighed and try to find if there’s a tiny hint that she might missed me too. Then a guy walked towards here table and casually leaned his body against the table.

 

Rae In looked up at him and smiled while nodding her head. The guy smiled and gave her a lunch box and she seems surprised but then she smiled at him while thanking him. I founded myself in shock when the guy touched her hand and she was relaxed.

 

She didn’t flinched or took her hands away then the guy left her. She opened the lunchbox and by that time, I wasn’t going to stay anymore. I quickly ran away before accidently bumping into someone. I quickly lowered my hat and bowed.

 

“I’m sorry.” I said but then the girl peek through my hat and gasped. “CAP!” she recognized me and adrenaline rush through my body. Without glancing at her, I quickly ran away and was thankful that she didn’t followed me.

 

That was close. I smiled to myself but then the image of Rae In with that guy wiped the smile of my face and replaced it with regret, remorse and sorrow.

 

There’s nothing left for you here, Minsoo. I told myself and went back to the dorm.

 

 

 

[ Rae In’s POV ]

 

Hongbin came and gave me a lunchbox reasoning that I didn’t eat well enough. I nodded and thanked him out of respect since he was nice enough to buy me some lunch but when he touched my hand, I felt nothing.

 

No sparks, no electric current, no fireworks not like when I touched Minsoo. That’s just proved that he’s my soulmate but the thought our not being together again throw my appetite out of the window and I closed the lunchbox again.

 

Then I focused back on my job –well I tried to not until I saw Minji running towards me. Her hair were all over the place, her breathing was unstable and she look flushed.

 

“Rae In! I just saw CAP in our building!”

 

My heart leaps and make somersault as I heard those words. Were Minsoo here for me?

 

“What? Really? Where?  When?” I bombarded her with question and she giggled. Wait? Is she joking or serious?

 

“Rae In, I never knew you were into Teen Top? You said you don’t know them the moment I asked you about them..” she teased and I forced a smile.

 

“I did a researched on them.” I lied and thankfully she brought it then she explained that she saw CAP just around the second floor near the wall. My heart leaps as I listened to her.

 

Could it be that CAP misses me?

 

Does he want to get back together?

 

Does he still love me like I am with him?

 

That day I couldn’t think properly, my mind was always on Minsoo. I kept staring at my phone, waiting for a message from him. Waiting for him to ask if we can talk or meet or even asked how I was doing because I wanted to believe that maybe we can find ways to work this out.

 

Because I still want him, my heart still longed for him and my mind need him. 

 

And now I’m in my room watching outside, staring at the rain while sighing. I flicked my phone open and still ‘No new notifications’. Nothing. I heard nothing from Minsoo. I bite my lower lips and tried to hold my tears back but it didn’t work.

 

Nothing I do worked, everything I think is Minsoo. He never left my mind.

 

I looked outside and saw a person with an umbrella staring at me, when he saw I caught him staring at me, he started walking away. My mind went on hyper mode and I ran through the street barefoot. I didn’t bother taking an umbrella with me.

 

I ran after him and shouted my hearts out.

 

“MINSOO!” I screamed and I saw he stopped walking away. I know it’s him, I know that’s him, I’m a 100% sure that’s him. He turned around and saw me, barefoot, wet, crying and in pain.

 

Quickly he ran towards me and covered me with an umbrella. “Are you crazy! What if you get sick?” he scolded me and I hugged him. “Baby, I can’t do this. I don’t wanna do this.” I cried while hugging him and he froze.

 

Okay, not a good reaction but what do I care?

 

I need to hug him, I need him in my life.

 

“I don’t wanna lose you, Minsoo. You’re everything to me. Please don’t leave me for Yubin, I know you like her but I want you.” I cried in his arms finally I felt his arms around me and the rain pouring on us. Turned out, he let go the umbrella and hugged me.

 

“I thought I lose you already, darling.” He muttered and I shook my head. “Please don’t hate me for leaving you and one more thing, me and Yubin were an act, just to get some attention for our new comeback. I don’t love her like I love you.” He said and again I shook my head. “I can’t never hate you. I love you so much that it hurts and thank god you’re not in a relationship with  her.” I said and he hugged me tighter. “Don’t worry, I’ll tell my president to clear the rumors.” He said while my hair.

 

“Minsoo, promise me we will try. I know our lifes are different but I don’t want you to give up on us. Try even if it’s hurts because losing you is the same as dying.” I said and he nodded. “I won’t stop fighting for us.” He said and I cried harder in his arms.

 

“I didn’t think this could happen again. Hugging you like you belong to me only.” I said while chuckling and he slightly let go from the hugged but then he cupped my face.

 

“I am yours. Always and you’re mine.” He said then slowly he leaned in and I closed my eyes. This is what I want, this is what I need and this is the only thing that matter.

 

I felt his lips slowly touched mine and I already felt sparks, fireworks and electricity running down my body. It was a mere touch and I’m already over the moon. He slightly opened his mouth and pecked my lips. I reciprocated his pecks and opened my mouth, I felt his tongue entered mine as his hold around my waist tighten and bringing us closer.

 

I hummed and wrapped my arms around him. He titled his head to his left and mine to my left, we began to devour each other lips like we have never been. Minsoo finally let go of my lips unwillingly and smiled.

 

I have never felt so warm yet it was cold and raining makes it colder but I only felt warmness in my heart. I know now Minsoo is the one, I  just hope he felt the same and is willingly to go all out fighting for us because without ‘us’ I don’t know who I am.

 

“I love you Kim Rae In.”

 

Those words never sounded so meaningful in my entire life. I felt my tears building up again and I nodded because I couldn’t talk, I felt a huge lump on my throat that forbidden me from talking. Minsoo chuckled and peck my lips.

 

“At least say you love me too, darling.”

 

He said while tucking my hair behind my ears. I smiled as I felt the tears fell and Minsoo wiped it with his thumbs.

 

“I love you too Bang Minsoo.” I said and he nodded. “Let’s go home and showered.” He said with a tiny hint of playfulness in his voice. I chuckled and let him lifted me up in bridal style. “Next time wear shoe, don’t go running barefoot.” He said and I nodded while hiding my face at the crook of his neck.

 

[ CAP’s POV ] 

 

They say that a love scar can be healed by a different person. Well maybe not for me because the only person that can heal my scar is the one that caused it. I don’t need other person, just having her with me, having her as mine. It’s enough.

 

I sat on the bed waiting for Rae In to change into her pyjamas. When she hopped on the bed, we cuddled while I buried my face on her hair. Inhaling the scent I have missed for weeks. “I wanna love now, I wanna love you more passionately than anyone else.” I said and she looked up at me.

 

I could see she was shocked, astonished, flabbergasted and amazed. Finally she smiled and nodded her head before laying her head on my chest.

 

“My heart only knows to love you, Minsoo.” She said and I felt happy that I still have her in my arms. I caged her with my arms and kissed her head.

 

“Don’t worry about anything, I won’t ever make you cry. I only need you to be by my side until always.” I said and she laughed while hitting my chest.

 

“Stop using lines from your song, Minsoo. I’m not stupid.”

 

**

 

There another oneshot done! Hope you like it! Comment!! And also thanks to my friend, marielleying for helping me to find some errors. 

Check out her story, it's all amazing even Im addicted to her story. XD