“Ch-Chang Min ah…”

I stuttered even in my whisper. It was a little hard to believe that I would actually see him in person again.

You see, I was still in high school at that time, and so was Shim Chang-Min, the youngest member of future Dong Bang Shin Ki.

It was no surprise that my first day there, that when Chang-Min walked it, a lot of the girl’s eyes darted in his direction, though he was different. He ignored them ALL, but being stupid as I was, I accidentally bumped into him.

“Cheosonghamnida,” (Sorry) I quickly replied and bowed and continued to walk on. Of course I took a quick glance at him, but that was all. I do admit at that even at a small glance, he really did have the most handsome face I’ve ever seen, but I wasn’t stupid enough to blurt it out to world. I blushed slightly though as I walked away.

“Chakkam man,” (Hold on) I heard a call from behind me. He was calling me, yes, Chang-Min was calling me. Of course I didn’t know his name at this time. “You’re new here, right?”

“Y-yeah,” god I hated stuttering.

“What’s your name?”

“Kim Min-Sung,” I was surprised how perfectly that came out.

“Shim Chang-Min, nice to meet you,” and he held out his hand for me to shake it, which I took willingly. That was how our amazing friendship started.

He became my “oppa” and treated me like a queen. No, seriously, he treated me as if I was the most special person on earth.

Min-Sung’s 18^th Birthday

I woke up a little later that morning, knowing that it was Saturday, but as soon as my vision came into view, I practically screamed and slapped away the face that was hovering over me, but quickly regretted it when I saw it was Chang-Min.

“O-Oppa, M-Miahne yo,” (Sorry, less formally) I said stuttering, uggh.

“Aishhh…You and your unbearable strength,” and he continued to rub his apparently sore cheek, “anyway…” he turned back around to face me and held out a small box, “Saeng il chukkahamnida~” (Happy Birthday) he sang out with his beautiful voice.

“Aww you’re so sweet,” and I took the box from his hands, but not before I gave him a small hug. I quickly ripped off the wrapping paper around it and opened the small box. I gasped, “Oh my gosh…”

It was really an “Oh my gosh” moment. The necklace that was sitting in the box was so….I’d like to say beautiful, but it was very simple, but it looked so beautiful as well. It was a blue orb-like figure, with a small red heart in the middle.

“You like it?”

I still remained speechless as I took it softly into my palm to admire how pretty it looked, “Ya, Chang-Min ah…” I finally started.

“Hm?”

“…T-Thank you so much…” and I gave me a hug once again, this time not letting go for a while.

Chang-Min’s 19^th Birthday

Okay, so you would think that on HIS own birthday, I’m supposed to be treating him or giving HIM something, but no, watch this.

“What do you want for me to do for you today Oppa? I’ll do whatever you want, of course, only for today.”

“Hmmm…Go out with me,” that caught me a little off guard, “Nothing serious. I just wanted to spend more time with you on my birthday.”

I smiled, “That can be arranged easily.”

“Good,” and he put his arm around my shoulder, “Now where does my Min-Sung want to go today?”

There was never a time before when I didn’t feel comfortable and loved by Chang-Min. It was about this time that I realized that I was actually starting to fall for him. His smile, his eyes, his personality, his everything mainly, but of course I couldn’t tell him that.

Ano hi deaenakereba konna kimochi shirazuni
(If I never met you, I wouldn’t feel how I feel now)

“Any ideas on where to go?” he asked me again.

“Umm…” but then my stomach started to grumble, how embarrassing.

“Seems like you’re really hungry,” he beamed a smile.

“You know me so well,” I replied sarcastically, “But I don’t want to eat in a restaurant.”

“Then what?”

“…You cook something.”

“Excuse me?”

“Come on. I know how well you can cook. COOK SOMETHING!!” I demanded. (I made Chang-Min a good cook)

“Yes mom,” he said rolling his eyes as he went to the kitchen.

Almost an hour later, I could smell something really good in the kitchen so I decided to check on what my Oppa was cooking, but right as I entered the door way-

“Ready!” his face practically jumped out at me and I screamed as I fell forward toward him as both of us made contact with the ever-so-lovely kitchen floor. Well, mainly him, because my face made contact with his chest. Oh fun. As soon as I regained temporary…um…vision, I saw that Chang-Min’s face was just inches from mine, looking at me with his mesmerizing eyes. I could literally feel both my heart and his beat against each other as I tried to hide a blush under my long strands of hair.

“Would you mind getting off of me so we can eat?” he asked, and I looked back at his face. He showed small signs of amusement, but they were gone in a flash, yet I could still see him smiling as he helped me up.

“Miahne yo,” (Sorry) I said and bowed slightly.

“Kwenchannah,” (It’s fine) he said as he wiped off some of the dust on his shirt, “Let’s eat, I’m starving.”

If you all know Chang-Min well enough, which I’m sure most of you do, it should be obvious that there was practically a feast on the table due to his extraordinary eating habits. I think he has a black hole for a stomach…seriously. Other than that, I was amazed at the food on the table. There were large bowls of kimchi, ramen, bulgogi, and dumplings, not to mention a larger bowl of rice in the middle.

“Dig in,” he said delightfully as he took big chunks of each dish (including the rice) and just piled them on top of each other on his plate. (of course excluding the ramen) Only god knows how this boy can devour so much food in a VERY small amount of time.

It was only about 20 minutes later that practically all the bowls on the table were empty. I only ate, at max, one bowl of rice and probably one heaping spoonful of each dish. Chang-Min ate everything else.

“I’m full,” Chang-Min finally said. It’s a miracle I tell you.

“Miahne yo, Oppa…” I said in a little guilt. I’m really not a good friend.

“For what?”

“I couldn’t give you anything for your birthday, and you ended up cooking for me.”

“Min-Sung ah,” he started and looked at me solemnly, “Don’t you realize it by now? We’re best friends, you being here is more than enough for me.”

I blushed hard, and I could tell he saw it because he grinned slightly at me.

One Eventful Day

It was the day before Chang-Min would leave for his tour around Korea because he finally made it into DBSK and I wanted to give him something special before he leaves when-

-SCREAM-

Well, I tried to, but the hand over my mouth block out all the sound. The next thing I knew, I was being dragged into an alley, into a random door, and shoved onto a random bed where the person (apparently a man) tried to pull my clothes off.

“You’re mine…” and it happened. I never made it to Chang-Min in time before he left, so when I was finally released by the stranger who….r- me…I just went straight home and cried myself to sleep. I received numerous calls from Chang-Min but never picked up any of them.

The Day Before

I stood up to get out of Chang-Min’s car. He was simply dropping me off at the coffee shop on the street corner, but he told me he had some stuff to do so I needed to find some way to get home.

“Don’t worry about me Oppa. I’ll be fine,” I said and smiled.

“You sure?”

“I’m sure,” I reassured him one again. He gave me one last smile as he started his car once again and drove off into the distance. I never knew that this would be the last time I would see him.

Machikado de surechigatte owatteta noni
(At the junction in town was the last time we met)

Back In The Present

How could I face him now? After 3 years, and with a 2 year old baby in my arms, here I was. I was at a banquet being held for DBSK. I got invited via one of my close friends which was part of the staff that prepared the banquet in the first place, but mainly, I was just looking inside from the balcony I was on. I shouldn’t even be allowed to bring my daughter with me, let alone be invited to this prestige event, but here I was, doing just that. I heard the door behind me open, and I practically gasped at who it was.

 “Ch-Chang Min ah…” I stuttered even in my whisper. It was a little hard to believe that I would actually see him in person again, but I looked him again. He looked much more handsome than he did 3 years ago, especially in the suit he was wearing.

“Oh I’m sorry, I thought this no one was here,” and with that, he turned around to leave.

“Chakkam man-” but I quickly stopped.

“Yes?” he turned back to me, but now, my body was completely facing him, and he could see little Sung-Hee in my arms. He took one glance at the baby and smiled as he walked up to me.

“Aww, she’s so cute,” but he avoided trying to touch her, “I’m sorry once again miss. What’s your name?”

I tried to look away as my heart sank, but my eyes made contact with his, which I should have tried better to avoid, for as soon as it happened, his smile went away and his face quickly turned to shock.

“M-Min-Sung ah…” he tried to say. I turned away more to hide my face, but he took me by the shoulders and made me face him, “Ming-Sung ah…” he repeated.

I just now averted my gaze somewhere to the side while trying to keep my tears in, but he shook me a little while trying to look into my eyes.

“W-Why are you here?” he asked.

I started to answer, thinking if I could be as cold to him as possible, I could just let him out of my life completely now, and he could go leave happily.

“What do you want?” I replied harshly.

He kept silent as he continued to look at me, but the most unexpected thing happened. He did his best to pull me into a hug without suffocating the baby in my arms. I could feel his smile on my shoulder even though I couldn’t see it, “I missed you so much,” and I could even hear small sobs in his voice.

I tried my best not to cry, but I did anyway, right into his shoulder.

We were in a private dining room in the back now requested by Chang-Min so he could have some time to talk to me without the hassle of the press in the main hall.

“How’ve you been?” he asked me smiling.

I stayed silent and still wouldn’t face him.

“What’s the baby’s name?”

I still wouldn’t reply, but I was getting a little irritated.

“Why-” but I interrupted him.

“Aren’t you even at least a little mad at me?!” I said a little loudly, “You see me 3 years later after I supposedly left you, after I promised I would say good bye. Don’t you at least hate me a little?!?!”

“M-Miahne yo…” he said looking at the floor now.

“What the hell would you be sorry for?! You did nothing wrong! I avoided you, and I tried my best to make you forget me. Aren’t you even at least a little frustrated?!” and I grabbed his collar.

He looked into my eyes again, I couldn’t stand it, and he started to speak again.

“Did you want me to hate you?”

“N-No…” it took me a while to muster up the energy to say that though.

“Then why ask me these things? You’re my best friend, I knew you obviously had a reason not to make it,” and he sighed, “I just wanted to know why, but you never called me back.”

“If you knew why, you’d never want me to see me again,” I said, “It’s better if you never knew and just shun me forever.”

“Try me.”

I turned to him now, with confidence, still holding young Sung-Hee of course.

“I was , and beaten, is that what you wanted. Would you want to still be with me?”

“R-?...”

“This was the exact reaction I tried to avoid,” I pick up my purse from the chair that I brought along, “Good bye Chang-Min,” notice that I didn’t call him Oppa.

“Kim Min-Sung!” he shouted me name, “Why did you keep that from me in the first place?”

“Would you have believed me if I told you before?”

“So you assumed that I wouldn’t accept you after?!” He caught me off guard, “Do you really think that lowly of me? Did you really think that I wouldn’t want to be your friend because of someone else’s stupid actions?” I could hear a little sobbing in between there too, “To you, that may be a bad thing to happen, but to me…” he walked up to me and slowly rubbed Sung-Hee’s forehead, “To me, she’s a miracle,” he was crying, but a smile was still plastered on his face.

I had nothing else to say anymore. I can’t believe that he made me feel this stupid, I hate him, but I hugged him right then and there.

“Why didn’t you want me to see you like this?” he said over my shoulders.

I cried full-heartedly now, “Because I loved you! You were too good for me, and you deserved a better friend!”

“You don’t get it, do you?” he said and looked into my eyes, “There’s nothing better than you because YOU’RE the best…and I love you for it.”

I was still crying, but I looked into his eyes as he looked into mine while pushing some strands of hair out of my face.

“Min-Sung ah…”

“Hm?” I said, but his lips connected with mine. It was a small chaste kiss, but it had all the meaning to it as any other full “make-out” session.

“Saranghae,” (I love you) he finally said and he hugged me.