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"Get out!! I say get out!" I shoved Tao out the door, not allowing him to explain. Quite frankly, I was kinda sick and tired of all the excuses he keeps saying, all those lies. Its over. Once and for all. 

"But _-_____! Please! Just hear me out!" Tao begged, standing out the door. 

"Goodbye, Tao" I sobbed and slammed the door shut. 

I ran straight to my bedroom, tears streaming down my face. 

Why?! Why does it hurt so bad...? 

I looked in the mirror and saw what I mess I was. Makeup smudged all over my face because of the tears. Eyes swollen. I slowly shifted myself towards the bathroom and washed my face. 

A good night sleep. Thats all I need. I'll be okay once I have a good rest.

I tried to reassure myself and lied myself down on the bed, burying my face in the pillow. 

Its not the first time that Tao and I fight like this. We always fight. Yet we always make up after that too. With Tao, its more downs than ups. I slowly reached for my phone on the nightstand. 

I wonder if he's calling me...

I unlocked my phone. 

Nothing.

No missed calls, no messages. Nothing. 

Is it really over this time...? Is he giving up as well...?

I lied on my back, facing the ceiling. Thoughts and memories started to put itself on replay in my head.

Memories such as how Tao first smiled at me at school. He was infamously dubbed as the "cold and unapproachable boy" due to his serious yet somewhat very attractive look. He never smiles. Not to anyone, but he did to me. At first I thought my mind was playing tricks with me, until he asked me for my number the next day. 

Unconciously, I found myself smiling. But I quickly shook my head and the tears started streaming down my face again. 

Go to bed now, ______. Go to bed. 

I tried to shut my eyes tight, counting sheeps in my head to block the memories out. But it was all in vain. 

"1, 2, 3... 4.... 5......" I count as tears continue to run down along my face.

I sat up abruptly, throwing the pillow towards the wall. 

"WHY?! WHY DOES IT HAVE TO HURT SO MUCH!!" I screamed and eventually broke down. I rested my head on my knees as I continued crying, remembering more and more memories that I shared with Tao. 

How I drift off to sleep, I dunno. I woke up the next morning, eyes and cheeks all puffed. I felt like a part of me, no, not a part, I felt like my whole being was literally broken. I felt, dead. Lifeless. I slowly pushed myself up and looked at my phone. 

8 missed calls, 1 message.

I opened up the text message and it was Tao.

"Meet me at our place. 5pm. I won't leave until you come."

I look at the clock on the nightstand and its already 2pm. 

Maybe he's trying to tell me that its really over. To really end everything, officially. 

Its hard, to face him, when he broke my heart. But I knew Tao, when he said he won't leave until I go, he really means it. He's a man of his words. I had no other choice. 

Although it was only 3 hours, it felt like forever to me. Somehow, I really wanted to meet him, badly. My heart was pounding like I was going out on a date with him.

No, not this time. Its not a date anymore... Its over. 

Each time the word "over" crosses my mind, a tear would slowly form and I'd always have to blink it back. 

5pm eventually came, and I drove to meet him, our place. The beach, where he took me out for his first date. He always liked the beach. 

"_____-ah, now that I have you, I no longer have to stroll alone at the beach. I can finally look back at the footprints I leave and see that there's another set of footprints beside me. I love you, _______" he smiled and leans over to plant a kiss on my forehead.

I wiped away my tears as I remembered the sweet memory he left me. 

There he is, standing by the shore, hands in his pocket. I tried to straighten myself as I slowly walk towards him. 

"________" he called out sadly.

I nodded. I knew I would burst into tears if I start talking, so I preferred not to. 

"_________-ah. I'm sorry I didn't call last night. I... I knew you wouldn't answer anyway, and you're right. I'm an idiot. A jerk. I keep breaking your heart and you deserve so much more than me" he sighed.

I deserve so much more...? So he really is letting me go...

"________. I know, you deserve more than this. But... I want to try again." he held my hand and looked at me in the eye. 

"I'm broken, I'm lost. But with you, I'm fixed and I'm found. I can't forget you, ________. I know I've made a lot of mistakes. I know I always promised that I will change but I don't. But trust me, _______. I've finally figured myself out. I can change. I really can..." he continued.

He looked at his pocket. 

"________, if you would believe me again. If you would allow me to be in your life again. I promise, I will do everything I can to make you the luckiest and happiest girl in the whole wide world. _________, will you, marry me?" he kneeled down on one knee and took out a diamond ring from his pocket. 

I looked at him, tears blurring my vision. 

"I love you, Huang ZiTao..." I whispered.

He smiled and slipped the ring on to my ring finger. 

"I love you too, _______." he chuckled and hugged me.

"You know, you're like a caffeine to me. So bad, but so good." I said before he caressed my cheeks and kissed me. 

Maybe I'm addicted to his love. To him. Like caffeine.