Story Link

Alrighty! I'm going to score you with the rubric. ^^

Title & Poster: 10/10

Initial Thoughts: Hmmm..... looking at the poster and title, I think this story will be about Eunhyuk's and Donghae's  experiences of a o life v.s  a drama life? Hahahaha sorry if my prediction is wrong. Lets find out!

The title is very long but very catchy. Aherm.... maybe the word o is what attract everyone? :D

The poster is beautiful. I like it! ^^

Description & Foreword: 8/10

I was confused at first on your description. I thought you were advertising for another story that you're writing or something. But when I read the little synopsis after that I found out it was a movie advertisement for this story. *Having the aha moment to myself* The whole point of the description and a foreword is to let your readers know what they're going to read without revealing too much about your story. You surely did grab my attendtion and I really want to know what the story is about.

Grammar/Spelling: 16/20

"You're just mad becuase your worm isn't as big as my python." There is a typo here. I'm pretty sure you know how to spell "because".

I did found a few mistakes but I'm not going to correct it. Hehehehe. That's the editing and proof reading shop job. You can go and request from a shop to help you with grammar.

Plot of the Story:15/15

Oh, very nice so far. The plot is great and the story is flowing very smoothly.  The story is off with a good start! I don't know about later on on though but I know this story is definitely going somewhere. It will be a successful story so please do continue on with this wonderful story.

Writing Style:14/20

 "Lucky for him, he landed his first lead role in action/romance movie called Opposites Don't Attract."

Landed? Like a plane landed? I think  obtained or attained are better replacement for landed. Be careful on your word choice, choosing an inappropriate word, when trying to show or describe something may make your sentence look weird and readers will not understand the exact feeling you have in mind.

There are some good words you used to describe the characters feelings.

ex: Donghae fumed toward his manager.......

Instead of using mad or angry you use fume which allow readers to visually imagine Donghae in rage with steams coming out of him.

Some of your sentences are not flex and did not connect with other sentences.

ex: The actor got up from his chair wanting to clear his mind. He wasn't going to go running since it was would get him all sweaty. The makeup on his face would only get messed up. Donghae was sure not to go to the mall either. He didn't want to be stalked by fangirls or fanguys. Yeah it was an amazing feel but sometimes the actor needs privacy.

Attempt to correct: The actor got up from his seat then walk back and forth hoping to clear his mind from the disturbing news. Yet this movement did not help at all. No matter how many round of walking back and forth movement he does, the news still linger in his head. Maybe if he run then his thoughts would also run away from him. Running always help Donghae when he want deprive his stress from the overwhelming schedule. On second thought, he will be drench in sweat and his make up will be ruin. ...............

Something like that. I know it's a fail, but my point is when I read this paragraph it did not flow. He got up from his chair to clear his mind. How did that clear his mind? Then  you said he was going to run and go to the mall. It was to sudden. You have to somehow connect and make them flow. Do you get what I mean? I feel like I'm not explaining this well enough. Just make sure you re-read the chapter after you finish writing it. See if you re able to read over it thoroughly.

Overall, I think your writing structure just need some flex and flow in it. Other than that, I think you're good to go. ^^

Characterization:10/10

It's very important for readers to be able to indulge into your character and visually picture what your character is thinking or feeling. I think you did pretty well. I can see right away how cocky and arrogant Donghae is and how Hyukjae try to fit in with the people around him (especially with Donghae of course).

Originality:10/10

To me originality is not whether you have the same plot or characters like most other story had, but it's rather on how creative you are and the effort you put into the story. To be honest I never read something like this before and I can sense your effort in this story. Your chapters are neither choppy or short. It was at a good decent amount.

Reader's Reaction: 5/5

Wow CloudDYesung, I saw the word o so I decided to read your story. Just kidding! Hahahaha.

You kept true to your word about the comedy in this story.  I actually laughed as I was reading it. I also felt bad for Hyukjae. Hope things get better for him. Anyways, I really did enjoy reading your story. I shall subscribe for updates. Hehehehe ^^

Final Words:

I don't think grammar is your problem, just focus more on your sentence structure.

Well, I guess my prediction was somewhat pretty close don't you think?

Total: 88/100

Thank you for requesting for a review at USSR! Sorry for any mistakes or misunderstandings in this review. All human make mistake and I'm a human too. I hope our review give you some beneficial advices and help improve your writing. ^^