*pit* *pat* *pit* I can hear the pit pattering of the falling droplets of water out of nowhere. But, there is nothing that could be seen outside-other than the fact that I am stuck in this room. No doors, no windows just walls.

 

*It’s all white there’s no door at all I'm afraid* Afraid........that's the last thing I would want to say. I continued searching for the exit. But, to no avail I found none. I sat at the corner of the room and hugged myself while rocking myself back and forth hoping that the icky sounds would go away.

 

I began scanning the area there’s nothing much in here besides the pendulum clock and a Bed covered with white sheets and blankets, Other than that nothing more. I stood up and sat on the bed letting my fingers grimace on the silky blanket I didn’t notice I was wearing a white dress too. *since when did I change my clothes into this?*

 

"I've never felt this free before, if only I can stay in here forever"  i mumbled *where am I anyway?* I got pulled out of my thought when I heard something broke I turn around to see what it is when suddenly a very loud ticking and pounding sounds coming from the clock was heard.

 

*what's happening?* the hand of the clocks began ticking backwards it was as if it was counting backwards. I looked at it for a few minutes and noticed that it began spinning backward really fast.

"What is happening?" I began shouting and my heart began to pound real hard as if any minute it'll come out of my chest it feels like it is pounding the same speed and rate like the pendulum clock.

 

I tried closing my eyes but i cant, I can only look at my surroundings beginning to change the white walls are starting to disappear I took a step backward when I stepped onto something

 

"Ouch!" i shrieked and hold onto my foot *Glass?* where did it come from?  Blood started oozing out from my foot. But i could careless the surroundings around me began spinning. It was as if I was placed on a roulette I started to feel dizzy but the pounding and the spinning won’t stop and the last thing that I know.

 

Darkness swallowing me.

 

---------------------------------------------------

 

*tick tock* my vision was blurry when i first opened my eyes i was greeted with the blinding light.

 

"Blinding light?" I was shocked at first I looked around me there’s no white walls, no pendulum clock? What happened? There’s a bedside table beside me that looks utterly familiar. A familiar closet can be seen in front of me and beside it is a pink drawer with cute stickers and designs  in it, study table with piles of papers and books laying there flatly and a mirror-full length mirror placed right next to me

 

"Mirror.." I stood up and went in front it, this room.............this room seems familiar It feels like I’ve been here before? I stood right in front it and take a look at my reflection. I was about to touch it when suddenly.

 

"I wish mom would disappear like a thin air" I heard someone said I turned around but there’s no one beside me.

 

"I wish they get killed or hit by a truck" what the? I turned around and began looking.

 

"Who's there?  Show yourself to me! I’m not afraid of you, I’m warning you." I said, but I got no response. I began tapping my sides trying to look for something that I can use to defend myself but found none.

 

*Useless*

 

"They don’t know me, more or less not even my family" "how could they do that" "mom i love you" daddy please don’t leave me" I began hearing voices everywhere, some crying , some begging but who? *Who are they?*

 

"Please stop!" I said. I can’t take the noise anymore there’s lot of them, I tried covering my ears but i can still hear them

 

*I must’ve gone crazy* this isn’t funny at all.

 

"Love isn’t real. If they love me then why did they leave?" "Mom! Dad!  I got 2nd place in my school" "mom dad I won! I won! "

“She deserves it. Her family is a murderer." "You’re a murderer" "she sells drugs"

"You are useless" "ugly, pathetic, lowlife hobo " "Eww what a loner"

 

Stop, stop, this needs to stop

 

“You are nothing but a gold digger you act all innocent when you aren’t" "I'll kill them. I'll kill those people who killed the people i loved"

 

"I’m no longer me. You’re funny don’t you know that? I’m cold, I’m always cold" "why can’t you see I’m miserable?" "Why did you save me then?"

“STOP! I SAID STOP! I DONT WANT TO HEAR ANYTHING NO MORE!! . PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU! I HAVE ENOUGH!" I was yelling like I’m some type of lunatic but one thing caught me.

 

"The _______ you once knew is dead."  NO!!!!!!!!!!!...please stop. I began shaking my head, while rocking myself back in forth.

 

"Somebody please stop them" I wish i wish i can block myself out, I don’t want to remember anything anymore. I tried so hard to forget all of those bad memories why does it have to-

 

"boo!" i shrieked when  someone pushed me .i turned to see who it was a girl - A girl wearing a black dress, pale skin, black hair, black eyes -Eyes that could see through you

 

“liking what you are hearing?" she asked me. Her face shows no emotions.

 

“Who are you?" i said with my hoarse voice due to the fact that I am crying.

 

"You see it’s not easy to dissociate your memories out of you just so you could start anew" she told me, she's not even answering me.

 

"Those voices you heard just now, was your thoughts, MY THOUGHTS, and theirs" she continued while fiddling with the hem of her dress.

She chuckled as she approach me "i am you ___________, i am the other side of you".

 

I looked at her wide eyed "I am the flawed side of yours. But ever since then the incident that happened 2 years ago. You forced to take me out and dumped the old you, therefore you’re nothing but me" she told me.

 

I was quiet for a while.

 

“You killed yourself, you killed me, But i am happy now that I’m free. You freed the flawed you.  Me whom you despise so much Because, you are afraid that no one will accept me, Therefore you force yourself to be someone who's not you" she said and looked outside the window then she pulled me with her .

 

“Why don’t you take a look of yourself" she pulled me right in front of the mirror.

“Why don’t you stop now ______________" i told her and looked at her while she stares at me back. I began to shiver under her gaze.

"Well isn’t it nice to be alone? No one will hurt you and no one will question you." i told her

*no response?*

 

“I have my reasons-" I was about to explain myself when she suddenly cut me off and said.

 

"And I know those reasons" she look at me straight in the eyes -her gaze i piercing right into me I can’t move nor talk at all I just looked away.

 

"You see, I don’t like it when you act like me why don’t you, Never mind you see we think the same after all i am you" she told me

 

"We are just the same" i said “No we aren’t, You are unfair. You leave you heart shred into pieces, You didn’t even bother picking it up, we may be the same as what you thought, But you never not even once take a notice of yourself, Not even me. Do you know how much pain i have to go through i have to endure because you aren’t you, you are trying to act someone you aren’t because you are afraid to show the real you, But then when it all happened even though you have turned into this. You are still forcing to dissociate your memories with you and force them into me again. Just like what you did a while ago." she said and smirk at me.

 

I sat on the bed and look at her blankly "if I did, then it’s not me." I don’t know what made me say that, Even i am confuse.

 

"9:30 a.m. 7th of November year 2010" she told me, As she glance at the clock then look at me and disappeared

 

“Call 911 somebody help!" I heard someone yelled

 

*voices again* i closed my eyes not wanting to open it trying to block myself from here

I can hear sirens, people whispering.

 

“wonder what happened" a girls voice can be heard

“a car came passing by when suddenly a truck hits the car as from what i knew the car flew 3 times in the air before landing." now that caught me

I opened my eyes, i couldn’t feel my feet last thing i know I’m on my knees looking at the mirror as the scene played.

 

 “give way!" an old man trying to make way for the ambulance, police and other cars

 

 Police officers can be seen everywhere, some interviewing the people who witness the incident but my focus remains at the car

 

"someone is still alive" one of the helpers yelled. *still alive*

 

"young man can you hear me ?" the guy said as he force his hand to feel the young boy's hand checking if he still have pulse, it was low

 

"save me please." a faint voice was heard

 

“we will, we'll try to get you out of there." the boy just nodded.

 

“MOM,DAD,!" a girl around 16 years old came running at the scene crying, but the officers won’t let her

 

"stay here, you aren’t allowed to go there" "but my parents, they- they please get them out of the car please, please" *don’t look ,keep your eyes close

 

4 stretchers were pulled out at the same time the first one to get out was the little boy. The girl silently prayed while crying *God, please help them*

 

"Josh " i murmured as i cried silently ,he was taken immediately at the hospital

 

 The second and the third one released were.

 

“Mom, Tristan... "The paramedics began doing their job when suddenly one of them shook his head and pulled the blanket up on their heads

 

“they both didn’t make it" the man replied shortly.

*no..* I began shaking my head. This is too - no please just stop this-this memory. Why the hell ? I..

 

“ We got some problem here! we can’t get the man out of the car" someone yelled the girl was crying real hard now, trying to break free from the grip of the man wanting to stay close with her family "let me go ,please i have to save them".

An explosion was heard.

 

“we have to get him out fast." they tried to get the man out of the car But it was too late.

Another explosion was heard. It was too late.

 

"NO!!!!!! DAD!!!!!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" nooooooooooooooooooooo dad. Don’t .stoppppppppppppppp ,stop thisssssss!

 

The girl run for the car. Raindrops began pouring, She looked around and pulled someone beside her

 

“Help me, help me take my father out of there, please I’ve got to save him .I HAVE too " she began yelling ,people around her just look sympathetically

 

"why are you looking at me like that, HELP ME, ITS YOUR JOB TO SAVE PEOPLE's LIFE RIGHT,WHY ARENT YOU DOING ANYTHING?!"

 

“HURRY TAKE THEM TO THE HOSPITAL" she began running here and there, when she fell on the ground.

 

“ poor her...she lost her family in just a second" Someone said. The girl threw her a look.

 

"who are you to say that huh?  WHO ARE YOU TO SAY THAT?! THEY’RE NOT DEAD! YOU HEARD ME THEY ARENT .They’re alive, they will make it. I know they will" the girl sobbed. I tried to hug her but i cant i was stuck on my place

 

Some just shook their heads on her. She turned around fire engulfing her sight, raindrops prickling down yet she feels numb. She lost them all at once.

 

A man mid 30's patted her shoulder "everything will be fine" but the girl just looked at him blankly.

The crowd began to disperse, only the paramedics, fireman and police and the girl was there.

“ I still have josh right?" she mumbled, scared, she's scared, she's on the hospital, getting treated. She heard some people talked about the incident earlier, some feel sorry some aren’t . *it is indeed true,you aren’t able to please everyone you'll meet* the girl thought.

 

“uhm Are you ________? " The girl looked up to see the doctor.

 

“I’m sorry but Josh Kim didn’t make it" NOOOOOOOO!!

NO.

 

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

KRINGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG

“Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo” I shouted as i woke up from my nightmare, panting heavily and bead of sweats forming in my forehead i shook my head.

 

“*sigh* i dreamt of that again” I shook my head again as i reached out for my alarm clock. *SUCH A BAD DREAM* i covered my face with both of my hands, wiping my sweats off of my forehead. Trying to ease my breathing ing the first 2 buttons of my shirt.

 

I leaned my head on my left hand and lay down on my bed again.  Cover my eyes with the use of my arms. I turned to look at my clock

 

"3:43 A.M" why do you keep haunting me?

This won’t happen again, No more.  NOT ANYMORE.

 

I thought about the dream i just had a while ago.

 

*Life sure is unfair.* I chuckled bitterly

 

“I lost them all at once......"

 

That dream.

 It feels like a broken disc being played nonstop right in front of me.