Your love is the bright and vibrant red of life blood.

Our laughter is that of rosy winter cheeks, crinkled and slightly stiff from the cold.

We began in the summer, at the strawberry fields... do you remember?


I didn’t want to be here. Everyone was laughing and smiling. Everyone was having fun.
“Taemin stop being such a stick in the mud and come pick some of the good strawberries before Jonghyun eats them all!” Kibum shouted to me and all I could do was scowl. Like a brat. He used to call me that all the time, when he never got his way or when I would say no. Even now, a few years later, I could still hear his voice uttering that phrase for the first time.

Aish Tae, you’re such a brat you know that?

“Stupid Jinki...” I growled under my breath.  Kibum kept pestering me in words I heard but didn’t acknowledge, so I walked by a random patch and knelt down to grab hold of one of the fruit. I frowned slightly and looked at the bright red berry. Red and vulnerable, just waiting to be picked out from the others. Just like my heart. Shouldn’t it too be crushed then? Simply for its color and likeness? One hard and resentful squeeze was all it took for me to destroy it, the juice and fruit itself becoming a drippy mushy mess all over my pale palm.  I made a face at the sight, but managed to calm down and be put at ease by the fragrance that wafted in the air. Only strawberries could do that. And this one smelled sweet. Probably was a really ripe one.

“Now what’d you go and do that for?” I heard a deep voice say sternly with only a hint of joking in his tone, breaking me from my thoughts. I looked up and heard him sigh.

“What a waste.” He said and grabbed for my hand, taking a rag from his back pocket, white and stained with residue of what I knew had to be strawberries. First thing that ran through my mind? The blood on the sheets. Seeing him for the first time gave me a nosebleed. I absentmindedly giggled for a moment and looked up at the guy who had just spoken to me, for my smile to die, laughter to stop, and my gut and heart to wrench at the same time as I remembered where I was, what I was thinking about and what I was doing.

“I- I’m sorry.” I managed to say after clearing my throat. “I dazed out for a second.” I lied, but only partially. Dazing out led me to be this way for the moment.  

“That’s odd. I didn’t know dazing out could make someone give a poor defenseless strawberry a death grip like that.” he laughed. He had a nice smile. Pearly whites in a row, glistening at the world proudly. I hated his smile, it looked far too familiar, although I knew I had never seen this guy around before and I just had to look away. “That’s not how you’re supposed to eat them.” He teased and crouched down to me, messing around in the bush and pulling out another bright red one. Similar to the last. Not the same...It would never be the same Nothing is ever exactly the same, just...similar. Second best... almost but 'not quite'. I started to frown again but he grabbed my attention by all but shoving the strawberry in my face, which startled me, making my head tilt back in avoidance before glancing at him a bit confused.

“Try it. The berries out here are delicious. Trust me.” He gave me a little wink, which didn’t mean anything I know, but it made my stomach churn about again. I gave a half-hearted laugh, placed a smile on my face and cleared my throat before grabbing for it and taking it into my hand, studying it for a moment before taking a bite into it.  It was delicious. Sweet, slightly tart, juicy; a buzz for the taste buds. The other one probably would have tasted just as good if not better. Nothing would be as good... It won’t ever be the same.

I started crying as I chewed, silently of course. Maybe I was dramatic, but I knew I was still heartbroken. It had only been what? A week? Since he broke up with me? After five years together... could you blame me?

Jinki asked me out in 7th grade. I was ecstatic. We used to be best friends and I knew I liked him a little more than a friend even back then, and I wasn't ever ashamed of it. The joy of childhood right? I also knew he was curious. And It was a great relationship... for the most part, but what relationship doesn’t have its ups and downs? Especially one in which a majority of it developed and took place in high school. Having established a relationship before you both entered high school ... it was hard. I know that. But I thought we had made it after it was over. It felt like...

“W-why are you crying?” His voice rang out. I heard him asking me how it tasted. But I was stuck in my head, in my feelings, in my bitterness that was the polar opposite of the sweetness on my tongue. I wanted to puke.

Quickly wiping my tears I shook my head, and when he went to investigate, to probe more into my pit of self-pity I was starting to wallow in, I pushed him away, this stranger that had the nerve to give me the sweetness of strawberries when I felt the bitter taste of heartache and heartbreak on my tongue. I pushed him away and he fell onto the small patch of strawberries, crushing them all. Good. I thought to myself. Now they, like me, would too be irreversibly crushed. I flung the stupid basket I had been carrying to the floor and bolted off, careful to not step on any more bushes, and careful to not stop when my friends hollered for me. I didn’t need their comforting embrace. I just wanted to be left alone. To wallow in my despair and misery... alone. I ran for a few minutes before I was out of breath, and only crying slightly. It was then that I found the last long row of berries, smaller than the others, and green.

Just like my heart. Insignificant and envious.

I bent down and snatched one. Cold and hard when I gave it a slight squeeze.

Just like my heart. Distant and wary.

I took a bite  out of it and was met with a dry, sour and bitter taste and the tears started pouring down again.

Just like...me. I was bitter about it. If there was anything that could describe how I felt at this moment in time, it would be these. These berries, under ripened and green with the lack of sweetness present in the redder ones. I soon found the reason why. In their way was a tree. Gigantic and shady, standing in the way of their development and growth. Stopping them from where they needed to be and holding them back each year. I idly thought that maybe the tree should just be cut down so the berries could get sunlight, or that they should be moved, but my thoughts ended when I sniffled and wiped my tears and sat beneath the looming giant that hid me from the suns warm ray and sighed as I brought my knees up to my chest.

“What does she have that I don’t?” I said with a slight huff and leaned my chin on my  arms which were folded up on my kneecaps. If it wasn’t bad enough that my boyfriend of five years who I was madly in love with left me soon after we graduated and made plans to come out here, it was worse that he decided to leave me for a girl of all things. I felt so stupid, betrayed and...just upset.  It wasn’t long before I heard Kibum hissing and yelling at me off in the distance with what I at first thought was Jonghyun in tow...but he was a bit too tall to be him, so I sat there confused for a moment.  

“Lee Taemin! You get over here and apologize to this young man right now!”
I groaned and buried my face into my hands before standing. The guy from the strawberry patch. Of course. Kibum kept yelling at me, obviously furious with how rude I had been to him.

“I don’t care if you’re upset or mad at the world Tae, He did not deserve to be pushed into the ground because of your ill feelings toward someone else.” He spat and I cringed, having reached the twosome. I couldn’t stare up at him, the stranger. I was like a scolded puppy, knowing I piddled on the floor when I wasn’t supposed to, but it wasn’t really my fault. No one let me out when they should have. I didn’t want to push him down.  I didn’t mean to do it. But if they didn’t want it to happen, they should have listened for the signs. I didn’t want to be here. I met his gaze almost reluctantly, and managed to speak, muttering as I uttered an apology that I wanted to mean, but couldn’t fully do so. “I’m sorry I pushed you.”
He managed to smile and laugh it off. How dare he? Kibum his teeth and I knew he rolled his eyes at how half-hearted I sounded. I then knew there would be punishment and repercussions for both my actions when I got that weird feeling in my chest.
“Listen... My friend here isn’t a bad guy and he really is sorry.”
Key what are you doing...?
“I know you might be mad at him for what he did, but he’s been feeling pretty down lately...”
Key...Don’t even go there.

“And I think it’s making him feel a little out of place seeing all the couples around and families picking berries so I was wondering if you didn’t mind...”

Kim Kibum are you crazy?!

“Would you hang out with him for a little bit and try to cheer him up? He’s usually a joy to be around, and his happy demeanor can actually get annoying. But being around my boyfriend and I right now would just upset him...you don’t mind do you?” He asked batting his lashes.

I looked up, just to see what would say, expecting a flat out rejection.

“Sure.” He said, and the bastard had the nerve to smile. “I don’t mind...I mean, if Taemin here wouldn’t mind hanging out with me for a little bit. As it turns out, we can be lonely and miserable together, since I’m here alone too, while all my friends creep or stay with their significant others.” He laughed, but fake knew fake, and that laugh, was as fake as my smile as I uttered the equally fake response.

“Yes. I’d like that.”

Could he tell? I wasn't sure but he held out his hand, a genuine smile on his face and I grabbed it with my own in a polite handshake.

"My name is Minho."

"Nice to meet you... I'm Taemin." I gave him the best smile I could manage at the moment; A smile that didn't quite reach my slightly reddened eyes.

Kibum smiled and came close, patting us both on our shoulders. "See? We can play nice." He seemed thoroughly pleased. "You two have fun. And Minho, if you try and I mean try anything stupid...I will show you how strawberries can be used as the perfect murder weapons....no hard feelings." he winked and immediately sauntered off.

Minho laughed and muttered "None taken." Before turning to me with a smile that dropped when he realized that we were both still holding hands. I noticed it almost immediately after, and like oil and water our hands separated, embarrassment on our features. We apologized at the same time, paused, did it again and had a little laugh over it; nervous laughter, the laughter you get in awkward situations.

It was when he asked me if I would like to pick some berries with him that we started walking back, and it was when we both stood silent  during that walk back when  I realized...this was going to be a very awkward experience for the both of us.

*~*~*~*

As it turns out, it wasn’t as bad as I had originally thought. Not after some time had passed anyways. We didn’t say anything at all when we picked strawberries… A minor blessing I guessed. Did he not know what to say? Or did he too rather be around a girl than me? That gave another unneeded blow to my already battered and bruised ego.
 

Why do I keep doing that to myself?
 

I sighed for a moment, and he looked up at me, although I didn’t look back up at him, I could feel his eyes on me.  Having been subjected to that kind of treatment ever since the breakup by friends and family, I sort of grew a bit of awareness when people would stare at me…out of pity no doubt. Did this stranger Minho pity me too? I didn’t see why not. I was the pathetic little boy who cried when he ate strawberries, got mad and pushed some well-to-do person into a small patch of them and runs off like a baby after. When you added that all up it was no wonder that the poor victim didn’t have anything to say to me.
 

Probably just wants to be polite after being put on the spot like that. Knows I was crying, doesn’t want to make me anymore upset.
 

He called my name out quietly and I felt my body break out in little bumps, similar to the green ones that embroidered the outermost layer of the fruit we had spent about five minutes picking. I carefully looked up at him. I wanted to say ‘yes?’ but all I managed was a questioning hum, half-hearted and barely audible.
 

“The basket’s really full… I’ll go pay for it and then we can sit somewhere and eat.

“We don’t have to talk if you don’t want to. Promise.”
 

Promise. What was that word? What did it even mean?
 

Do you promise to stay with me forever? To never break my heart?
 

Of course Tae. I promise…
 

Okay then, I can say this in confidence. Jinki I…
 

“Taemin? Hey, are you okay?”  He was waving his hand in my face, crouched in front of me with a slight frown. I shook my head a few times and blinked away my thoughts, clearing my throat to speak.
 

“Huh?”
 

“You were dazed out again…I was worried for the wellbeing of the berry in your hand.” He laughed.
 

I couldn’t help but crack a smile then, giving him a soft short laugh as I looked down and gently picked it to put in the basket. “Sorry. I didn’t realize…”
 

“Are you ready to go then so we can chow down on these babies?”
 

He stood up and I followed suit.  “Sure.” My smile was fading, my mood was sinking but at least I wasn’t apathetic entirely with my response.
 

His smile widened and he seemed genuinely pleased with my response. I offered to pay after we weighed them. About ten or eleven pounds of berries came out to almost forty bucks, but Minho was insistent, just like Jinki when it came to paying for things, and it made me feel bad. He took my money in the end though, but in a weird turn of events, I had to give him credit for his sneakiness. He paid with his money holding mine the entire time, and handed me back my twenty.  Said it was change and gratuity for joining him. I didn’t know what to do or how to respond after that, but he didn’t give me enough time to do so, because when I tried, he called me to follow him and started walking off with the basket of rinsed berries.
 

He wasn’t silent this time and it startled me a bit. “So tell me Taemin. What brings you to The Strawberry Fields this fine day?”

I thought you said we didn’t need to talk if I didn’t want to…whatever.

I didn’t say anything. Was I really that bratty? I guess so. But… if you knew why, I’m sure you’d understand. I’m sure you wouldn’t ask me why I didn’t want to come up to this stupid strawberry farm or whatever. He didn’t seem to mind my not answering his seemingly simple and safe question, and continued to talk to me regardless. Had to give the boy credit, I would have just walked away.

“Okay then… well first of all congrats on graduating. I wish my friends would have wanted to do something like this after our graduation last year, since I love strawberries.” He laughed.

“I prefer bananas.” I said in an admittedly slightly flat tone.

He smiled at me and shook his head. It must have been towards my negativity on everything.

“Well they do say strawberries and bananas go together. Each tastes good on its own, separate from the rest…but you’d never expect them to taste fantastic together until you try it.”

I glanced up at him and made a small face before shaking my head and cracking a smile. “I suppose you’re right. But I’ve never had the mixture before so I can’t be sure that I agree with that statement.”

He gasped in surprise and turned me to face him with wide shocked eyes. “Never? You’ve never has a strawberry and banana smoothie? No wonder you’re so miserable!” He laughed and I could only stand there in utter shock.

Rude much?

“We have to get you one soon then. It’ll perk you’re mood up right away, I guarantee it.”

I doubted it. Highly.

*~*~*~*

His friend has a powder blue pick-up. We sat on the hood and shared the berries for a good part of an hour. We made fun of the couples, those looking to flirt and things like that. I was obviously unhappy, and much to my surprise Minho seemed equally as bitter as I, except he hid it.  But misery knew its own company.

I think there might have been a greater force at work because he started speaking to me almost immediately after that thought passed my mind. “I don’t mean to pry at all, but I think I can relate to how you feel.”

Is that so?

“Ironically I’ve recently gone through a break up myself.” He said quietly. His laughter, a sound we had been sharing the past hour disappeared. He was more hurt than he let on. I admit it made me nosy…curious was a nicer word so I waited to see if he would say something else.

“I know it’s rough…especially when you don’t understand why…why you of all people. I hope this doesn’t freak you out, but I feel like you’re the only person here who will get what I’m feeling. You know?”

I nodded. I knew that feeling all too well.

“It was a plan my friends and I had set before we graduated high school. Stuff happened and although I didn’t want to go, they made me come back here. It put me in a bad mood because being here alone…it makes everything that’s happened a constant thought in my head. I can’t shake it. Everywhere I look, every thought I think…it’s all him. And there is nothing I can do about it…” I muttered. I was shocked that I confessed…or well vented to a stranger.

That’s right around the time when I saw him. That was part of the reason I didn’t want to come. I had a feeling he would show up here. He was with her. How could he…why would he bring her around? To this place? It was supposed to be for us. Minho noticed the look of horror on my face. Horror mixed with pain, confusion and ultimately betrayal; I was crying before I even registered it. His eyes followed mine to the spot where the person who made me feel so stupid and pathetic was standing.

“Is that him?”

I nodded stiffly.

He made a sound…he was contemplating ,but I couldn’t tear my eyes away from my ex. He was linked to her arm, smiling, laughing, and feeding her strawberries… I felt sick.

“Do you mind if I kiss you?”

I heard him say it. But he never let me answer. He just turned my face towards his and brought our lips together. He tasted like…strawberries, comfort and understanding.

Was he watching? Why was this stranger, this boy I just met kissing me? What did I need to do in this situation? Should I let him? Did I need to stop him?…was he watching us? I couldn’t tell.

Minho told me later on that day. We were holding hands and smiling by then, he had succeeded in cheering me up and apologized for what he did before… although I honestly didn’t mind; his lips were soft. He saw us kissing. He looked mad.

...And that made me happy.

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Well there you have it. Part one. Tell em what you guys think. Expect part two soon~