MONTH ONE: BITTER BLACK COFFEE

Jaejoong says it's because he's in love with her. Yoochun believes the only reason he comes back is because of her. Yunho thinks it's because he likes the coffee. And Junsu could give a damn less about the reason. Changmin knows it's because of the coffee (seeing her is just a plus).

It's early July when he enters Jaejoong's Cafe. He's not sure what brought him to the place in the first place, but if it shuts Jaejoong for a second then he's fine with it. It's stupid, he thinks as he sits at a table with a window nearby. It's stupid, he thinks as he sees Jaejoong running over to him with a smirk. It's stupid, he thinks as he orders black coffee that he can barely stand. It's stupid, he thinks when Jaejoong smiles and heads back to the kitchen.

That's when he hears the twinkling laugh of Im Yoona. His eyes wander over to the girl behind the counter, rambling aimlessly about something that happened in the kitchen with a customer. Well, he doesn't believe in love at first sight, but he likes the way she her head back when she hears the customer reply to her story. Or the way her auburn curls seem to bounce of her shoulders, and make their way to the back of her head. He glances her way, her eyes linger on his figure for a moment before smiling.

And perhaps, it's that smile that's going to make him come back.

"That's my sister," Jaejoong states, startling the giant. Changmin only looks up with a shrug, pretending not to care that Jaejoong tells him vital information. The older male puts the white cup of coffee on the table and asks, "She's pretty, isn't she?" Changmin shrugs again, pretending once again that he doesn't care.

Jaejoong shrugs his shoulders now, and heads back to the kitchen without saying anything else. Changmin smiles once again at the girl with her head on her hand, absentmindedly looking in his direction. Jaejoong comes from behind and whispers something into her ear. He sees a smile form on her face and she giggles. Now, she's looking in his direction with a smile on her face.

He waves when she waves at him. The coffee is too bitter for his tastes as he sips on it, the atmosphere is too cafe-like for him to like, but he doesn't mind. He likes it anyways.

*

He never knew about Jaejoong's sister. The times he came to his house, he never saw her. She always isolated herself from her brother, she was either in her room, studying or out. He never told him where or why, he only told him that she was out. To see her so extroverted and kind to others, it seemed out of place.

His eyes flicker towards her petite figure as she picks up dirty plates, used forks and empty cups, humming along to a new song that the radios play too much. There's something amusing about this girl that he can't figure out, but he sips on his bitter drink as she continues to pick up crumpled bills with her lilac fingers.

She stops in front of him, a soft smile stays on her face as she greets him.

"You order that a lot," she says innocently, pointing to the white mug of black coffee. Cocking her head to side, she keeps quiet as if expecting him to reply to her.

The male adjusts his tie as he sips on his coffee once again. He wants to say something, anything, but he's getting tongue-tied and he just quietly drinks his coffee.

"Do you even like black coffee?" she continues, but he still sits there, silent to any of her questions. The girl shrugs her shoulder, picks up the tray of dirty objects, and heads to the back of the kitchen where he hears her shriek when Jaejoong surprises her.

He'll have courage to talk to her one day.

MONTH TWO: CARAMEL MACCHIATO

"Yoona says you don't talk to her?" Jaejoong asks. Changmin's eyebrows raise, not knowing her name is Yoona. The elder rubs the back of his head, not sure what to say anymore. "She finds you really interesting," he adds. Again, the younger boy just stays quiet as Jaejoong waits for his reply.

"Caramel macchiato," he says, making Jaejoong erase the words: black coffee. "I just don't like talking, you know that," he adds. The man shakes his head in amusement before leaving.

His eyes linger on the honey brown liquid. As his lips taste the caramel and the bitterness of the coffee, he blinks. It takes awhile for him to realize that he's drinking something sweet for once. Not too long though because his taste buds get used to the sweeter flavor of coffee and the lighter palette of colors. He enjoys the drink a little more than his black coffee, just a little.  

"Liking the macchiato?" she asks after making her rounds at the other tables. Her lilac fingers are now French-tipped. There's a pause in the conversation, and she's about to leave, but his wrist reaches for hers, forcing her to stay.  

It's a risk he desperately needs to take. If he keeps on being an introvert, things would never crescendo to what he hopes is a friendship, hopes, anyways.  

"It's okay. Do you reccomend anything?" he adds to the conversation. She pauses, it's the first time she hears his voice. It's not a deep, husky voice like she assumes, but a white chocolate tenor voice. Blinking, she picks up his cup as well before smiling once again.  

"Siwon Oppa makes really good mochas, but they're probably too sweet for you," she replies. He nods his head as if to agree with her, but he really just wants her to stay for awhile more. Just like she does with the other customers, but, instead she waves her goodbye, not looking back when she does.  

(He comes to the conclusion that she does that a lot.)  

"Does she do that a lot?" Changmin asks the next day he comes in. The older man only scoffs. He knows his junior too well, after one small chievement he wants answers. And he always wants a whole lot of answers. Not that Jaejoong minds, it's just quite tedious.  

"Oh, that. That's odd, she's usually always friendly with customers. Especially, tall and good-looking ones like you. Huh, I'll ask," he answers.  

.

(The guy forgets in about three minutes and Changmin ends up not getting answers.)  

"I'm Changmin," he says as she passes by his table. Awkwardly, the girl bows formally, confused on why he would say something like that. "Just for reasons," he says nonchalantly, trying to play it cool. The deer nods her head in a blank manner before smiling at him.  

"I'm Yoona," she says with that smile of hers. She tugs on her shirt before picking up his plate and cup when he notices the scars on the underside of her arm. They're fresh. The scabs are starting to form, but he can see the green ooze of an infection slithering in. It irks him that they're fresh, but he keeps that to himself.  

She doesn't notice his stares and continues to clean up. And right before she's about to leave, he says something of interest.  

"You can talk to me, whenever," he says sincerely.  

(She starts being friendler to him soon afterwards.)  

She sits at his table. Her fingers draw on the table, imagining little pictures as she sketches words into the table. Surprised, the male sits at his table, ordering a caramel macchiato while Jaejoong quickly writes down his order and stares blankly at the absentminded Yoona. 

"I want to be in love," she says, staring at the table and not at the towering figure in front of him. The fingers starts to trace a heart before writing break. "The couples are pretty, they think that they'll be together forever. I don't want to be left again. They all break me anyways," she says. She presses her fingers against the broken wood and stares at her arms. The scars are hiding behind layers and layers of foundation and cover-up. 

Changmin sits there, sipping on his coffee as though he's not fazed by her sorrowful words. In love, he's in love with someone, but he won't say because then she'd freak out. He wants to sit there in silence, waiting for her to continue to say something, but she sits there, quiet.  

Scooting a mug of a mocha to Yoona, she quietly starts sipping on the warm liquid. She's not sure how it got there, but she doesn't say anything. It takes a bit before Changmin says anything, but she doesn't mind, she doesn't care for conversation. Her fingers start to burn as she rubs her finger against the table, waiting for friction to heat her fingers. 

"Don't do that."

Her fingers burn now, they burn so much that they might get infected, but she doesn't care or mind. She's too amused by Changmin's non-speaking ways to realize that she should care. His hands land on her hands and she stops grinding her fingers against the table. His hand is warm on top of hers, she can feel the rough skin, broken tears of old skin and calluses. 

"You'll find someone soon enough," he states, biting back anything else that wants to slip out of his mouth. "Just be patient," he continues. Yoona nods her head as Changmin gets up from his seat and orders Yoona green tea. There's another hushed silence as she sips quietly on her drink.

"Ow," she hisses as she burns her tongue. The man in front of her just chuckles while she fans her hand up and down in front of . Seeing his amused look, she pouts and says, "Don't mock me, Oppa!"

Oppa, she calls him oppa, and that's enough for him to grin for the whole entire day.

(They talk more frequently about matters of love, ignorance, and depression, she always calls him oppa.)

MONTH THREE: EARL GRAY TEA

He comes to the conclusion that Yoona is more than a pretty face after three months. He concludes that September is the month of discovery and courageous actions. He's not sure why or what makes him do this, but he sits there, waiting for Yoona to show up like always.

She does, but not in a particularly good way. Her eyes are tired and broken, dark circles and broken skin, September isn't a good month for Yoona. Her eyes that usually sparkles seem to sparked out and became dull flickers. He has to ask Jaejoong why she's like this.

"Is everything alright?" he asks.

"Yeah," she lies between her teeth. He notices the way she sits at the table, fidgeting inbetween sentences and silences. Or the way she can't really look at him straight in the eye, but at the wooden table that seems to have all her answers. At one point, he lays his hand on top of hers and she finally llooks away from the table. Her brown orbs are dull and empty, her fingers that are soft are now rough and tired.

"Donghae likes me," she states finally. His eyebrow raises. Donghae, the new boy, who has smiles that could go on for miles, a face that girls swoon at and a personality that makes it hard to hate.

They stay quiet for a moment as she stares into his eyes. opens, but closes once more when she realizes what she might be saying.

Pause.

Pause.

Pause.

She smiles as though nothing happens, gets up from her seat and heads back to the kitchen. He hears Yoona's laughter and Donghae's melodious chuckle as he leaves the cafe. That's their only conversation for the month.

MONTH FOUR: DISTILLED WATER

"Where's Yoona?" he asks the first week of the new month. There's a silent pause, Jaejoong clicks his tongue before writing down some random order for him. "Where's Yoona?" he asks again before he leaves. Again, Jaejoong only clicks his tongue, staring at him with no emotion whatsoever. 

It takes him a minute before he shouts and leaves the cafe in the middle of the night. Jaejoong only clicks his tongue when something happens, something bad happens. 

It takes him an hour and twenty-three minutes to reach an apartment building, their apartment building. Meaning Jaejoong and Yoona, mostly Yoona, but still. 

The door opens to reveal a slit of the young girl's face, her eyes are sorrowful and broken, she unlocks the door and lets him in. The apartment is big, tidy and clean, not something he expected, but as the girl starts her trek to her bedroom, something seems wrong. 

"Jaejoong should be home soon," she says nonchalantly. She doesn't sound like herself, her voice extremely exhausted, her voice fades to an almost whisper as she disappears into her room. 

There's the sound of glass breaking, there's the sound of tears and the sound of someone dialing an emergency number. He's not sure why he dials the number, but he sure knows that there needs to be paramedics. 

"Hello, 119, what's your emergency?" 

"I think someone commited suicide." 

*

She lies in bed without much going in her thoughts. She should be dead now. He's not even sure how she survives that accident. But they sit there, her eyes focusing on the man in front of her. 

"Why?" Yoona asks, her voice, a whisper. "You should have let me die," she mumbles. 

He's about to say that phrase, the phrase that he wants to avoid. The phrase that he knows isn't right to say. Her brunette curls are damp and wet, there's a cut on her cheek, and maybe some broken bones, but it's kind of a miracle, her being alive. 

Jumping out of a five story window, without a care in the world, she should have died. 

"Because, I don't want to lose you," he answers. 

There's a silence and Yoona drinks her water like he is. Contemplating words to string together as she drinks. It's amazing to her that she makes it out of the hospital with just a broken arm. 

He visits her home more often, sits on her bed and listens to her talk about love, stars, and coffee. He laughs at her stories about the customers, and laughs even harder when she tries to mimic Donghae. 

It's as though she's okay again. Sometimes, not all the time, but she's close enough to believe that she's okay. 

"There's someone I like a lot," she says one day when he sits on her bed and she lies her head on his long legs. 

"And?" he asks as he runs his fingers through her long brunette curls. She looks at the ceiling full of stars, opens and closes it once again. 

"He just doesn't like me. He's perfect like Jaejoong says. Jaejoong says he likes me too, but he doesn't because that's silly." 

She closes and giggles as though she has too much sugar. He's about to say something, but Jaejoong unlocks the door to his home, yelling that Changmin has to leave, and barges into her room.

"Out, Changmin-ah," he hisses. 

"I was about to leave anyways," he says nonchalantly, hands in his pocket and casually leaves the room. 

Jaejoong doesn't like it when Yoona has any guys in her room, Changmin included. 

"You better not have abused her like you do to me," he complains. 

"Hyung, I love you too much to abuse you," Changmin replies. 

"Haha, funny," he finally states before kicking him out of the apartment and making him walk home. 

MONTH FIVE: APPLE JUICE

The girl comes back to work with a smile on her face. She starts to interact with the others as though she never left. Donghae notices the way she glances at Changmin and Siwon watches Yoona smile as she tries to converse with Changmin in erratic hand gestures. 

Most of all, Jaejoong recognizes that look in her eyes when she's around Changmin and how they light up. And how Changmin warmly replies to all her comments not like in the beginning. It's perfect he thinks, them being together, it's perfect. 

"She seems happier now," Changmin muses as he watches her prance around behind the counter. Jaejoong only sips on his cup of tea, nodding as well. 

"It's all because of you," he states. A rare smile appears on Jaejoong's face as he glances her direction again. "I've never seen her like this before. She grew up too early," he continues. 

"She grew up before?" he asks jokingly.

Jaejoong laughs along with his joke, running his fingers through his own hair, humming quietly to himself, coming up with answer after much contemplation. 

"That's why you never saw her around. She was busy studying for entrance exams. She's only two years younger than you, but she was already at your grade level. Smart kid, but she never had a childhood." 

Silence.

"She has problems trusting people too. She may seem all smiles and laughter, but the pressure of being perfect is too much for her. You helped her out."

More silence.

"She has someone to rely on that isn't one of 'us.' Donghae is too childish, Siwon is too manly, I'm her brother, the other workers can't do a better job than you can."

Pause. Changmin drinks a little bit of his drink, his face scrunches up. 

"What are you drinking?"

"Apple Juice." 

And then the laughter ensues once more from the two of them. Changmin has never been an apple juice kind of guy and Jaejoong has never been a tea guy. 

"It must have taken a lot for you to do that, Changmin." 

MONTH SIX: PEPPERMINT MOCHA

It snows. She's late for work, but no one will care. Her fingers are frozen because of the bitter cold. And then she feels someone's hand lace with hers. It's snowing and someone's hands are laced with hers. 

"Hey," the male calls. That voice, that sweet voice, it could only belong to one person. Her eyes look up to see the towering figure with the now blonde hair. "Late?" he asks. 

The girl nods her head, her fingers finally warming up because of his touch. She has a lot to confess to him. There's a lot to confess, but she doesn't really want to say anything yet. 

"The lights are pretty," she says. It's dark and the town lights illuminates the whole downtown. He nods his head, squeezes her hands and smiles at her. 

She breathes in a little, here goes nothing.

"Thank you." 

Silence.

Another breath of courage.

"For showing that you care, I never really think people care about me." 

Her heart is beating at an odd pace now. 

"And, I always think that people wouldn't care if I left, but even talking to you for a little bit is enough. I mean, you smile at me. It makes my day. And you saved me from my death."

Her heart is beating too fast, how does she make it stop?

"There's someone I really like..."

Three.

Two.

She's going to have to jump and hope for the best. 

One.

"And it's you."

Her breathing stops when he lets go of her hand, stares at her and his lips touches her lips. 

They taste like white chocolate peppermint mocha. And he pulls away from her with a soft smile on his face. It takes her six months to confess, six months to confess all the feelings she has for someone like him. 

Someone who saves her from her asylum. Someone who makes her feel loved. Someone who doesn't run away when she tries to get closer. Someone who cares for her. 

And she loves it.