The senior year project ended yesterday. And I haven't seen him after our class. He wasn't in lunch and he didn't walk me home. But I figured he was just busy.
I wished our professor would have extended it. Just so I could spent more time with him. 
I knew we won't ever spend time with each other after the project. I just knew.

I was making my way towards my locker when I heard a bunch of male voices coming out of the nearby room.
Eavesdropping wasn't my thing, but for some reason, I felt as if I needed to hear them.
Yeah, I made the right choice and the wrong choice.
One voice belonged to Chanyeol and the other, I'm guessing was probably his friend's voice; Do Kyungsoo.
"You have been spending most of your time with Seo Haneul, what's up man?" It was Kyungsoo.
"Nothing! She's my lab partner, why can't I?"
"I honestly think you have feelings for her. You've been too happy these days. Just like when you were still with Heerin."
"I can be happy if I want to." Chanyeol's voice seemed annoyed and frustrated.
"What do you feel about Haneul?" Kyungsoo suddenly asked.
I anticipated Chanyeol's answer. I waited until he spoke again.
"She's the smartest girl in the school and she's pretty.." I felt my heart beat faster as my lips curved into a small smile.
"...and I figured if I got her to be my partner she would get me good grades and if I spent time with her, Heerin would notice.."
He used me.
He used me for his grades.
He used to get his girl back.
I was nothing but a toy.
And to think he actually liked me. As a friend and maybe even something more.
I should've knew from the start.
A guy like him, won't ever like a girl like me.

I struggled to move away from the door as I dragged my feet with me towards my locker. I couldn't listen anymore.
Suddenly Kyungsoo and Chanyeol went out from the class. 
I heard Chanyeol calling my name.
I quickly shut my locker and walked in the opposite direction. I couldn't face him. Not without bursting into tears.
"Hey Haneul! Wait up!" He suddenly grabbed my wrist and turned me around to face him.
"Geez. I was yelling and you still couldn't hear me?" He chuckled.
I pried his hands off my wrist, "I heard you." I replied.
"Then why didn't you wait?" He asked with confusion in his voice.
"Do I have a reason why I would?"
He looked at me as his eyes searched mine, "What's going on-"
"Don't talk to me. You have your grades. You can get your girl back. You don't need me anymore. So go on with your life and I'll go on with mine."
I walked away, leaving him standing.
"Seo Haneul!" He exlaimed. But I continued walking.
From that day on, I avoided him. Whenever he would try to talk to me, I wouldn't reply. After months of trying, he gave up. 

Present Day (2012)

It was my last year in university already. I can't believe I was already graduating from university! 4 years have already passed since I last saw Park Chanyeol. 
Of course, it took me a while to forget him; but you can't simply forget someone who fell for. That Park Chanyeol, who learned to like in a few months. Who i fell in love with, in just 5 weeks. Love has no limitations. You can't tell when love will come. How long will it take to love a person. Love is love. It just happens; sometimes unexpectedly.

I was walking down the campus, heading to the nearby cafe.
"Seo...Seo Haneul?"
It can't be.
That voice. I knew it too well.
I turned around, afraid of facing him after 4 years.
It was him. It was really him.
"Park Chanyeol.." I replied.
He smiled at me. A smile I haven't seen for so long.
His hair was different. But his smile that I remembered remained the same.
I stayed silent as I stared at his face. Examining his face like I did, 4 years ago.
"Done?"
"D-Done what?" I stuttered. It suddenly caught me. He remembers. I looked up at him with round eyes.
He chuckled, "Still the same."
We stayed silent, "I'm going to class." I suddenly spoke. I was about to walk away when he spoke, "Want to get coffee with me?"

 

Yeah, I ended up in the cafe as we sat in silence.
He stared at me. I stared at him.
"I'm sorry," He suddenly said.
It caught me offguard. 
"What?"
"I'm sorry. I didn't know what I had done that made you disappear from my life, but I'm sorry. For whatever I may have said or done."
I was shocked and at the same time, frustrated.
"Wow. You really don't know?" I scoffed.
He looked up at me and nodded, "Then tell me."
"4 years ago. The last time we spoke..."
He listened patiently. Understanding in his eyes.
"Before that.. I heard you and Kyungsoo in the room. You were talking about me."
His eyes suddenly widened.
"You remember now?"
He nodded, "Did you hear everything?"
"I heard what I needed to."
I stood up from my seat, "I was just for your grades, and for getting your girlfriend back. I was toy right?"
"Thanks for the coffee." I bowed to him, "Goodbye, Park Chanyeol."
I felt myself on the verge of tears.
I was almost out of the cafe when he called, "You didn't hear everything, right?"
I turned around at him. 
There weren't any students in the cafe. Just me and him. (and the person behind the counter, but he's in the back room of the cafe anyways.)
"I didn't." I replied shortly.
"It's all a misunderstanding." He spoke as he stared into my eyes. 

We ended up under our big oak tree in the park.
"I was talking to Kyungsoo that day right? He asked me what you were to me. I told him that you were merely for my grades and for getting Heerin back. But that wasn't it."
I stayed silent as I stared at the empty park, with my back resting on the trunk of our tree.
"That was what I planned in the beginning. But as I spent time with you, my intentions changed. I fell for you. I fell for you harder than what I thought. I couldn't get you out of my mind Haneul. It was torture whenever I didn't see you."
I looked at him this time, his eyes brimmed with tears.
"I wanted to spend time with you; not just for the project. I thought I didn't have a chance. When you told me about your boyfriend, you seemed in love with him. It seemed as if..I was nothing to you."
By time he finished talking, I was in tears.
"You were everything to me."
He looked at me with his tear-brimmed eyes, "and you were and still are everything to me..I love you. I love you, Seo Haneul."
I felt tears run down my cheeks as he suddenly pulled me into hug. But it felt wrong yet so right.
"Do..Do we have a chance?" He whispered as his face was nuzzled in my neck with his arms wrapped around me protectively.
"I'm sorry.." I said as I pulled away. "I..I can't. I have a boyfriend... Baekhyun returned to Korea as soon as he finished his university. And it just happened, Chanyeol."
"Are you happy?" He asked as he held my hand. I knew it was the last time he would be able to hold my hand like this.
I nodded, "Yeah, I am."
He looked at me with understanding as if he knew he this would happen. He smiled gently as he caressed my cheek, "He's one lucky guy."
 

That was the last time I had spent with Chanyeol. We would see each other in the campus and would smile at each other. But that's all we could do. We never spoke, but when he smiles, it says a million words.
I would look at him, telling him I miss him. He would look at me, his eyes telling me that he loves me and always will.
We could never go back to the past. 
And I can't say I didn't have regrets but I'm happy now. 
I have a wonderful boyfriend who cares about me, makes me laugh, supports me. He knows about Chanyeol and he understood. I couldn't ask for more.
But I do hope for one thing.
I hope that Chanyeol would find someone who would love him unconditionally. Someone who would love him and show him, the way I wasn't able to.
As of now, I learned that Chanyeol isn't ready for a relationship yet. But I hope the time will come where his special girl will come to him.
 

I regret that I didn't show her how much I love her before. I regret that I wasn't able to gather enough courage to tell her how I feel.
If I could rewind time, I would tell her I love her everyday. I would hold her in my arms. I would kiss her hello and goodbye. I would show her how much I care about her. I would spend every moment with her.

But for now, I would love her from afar until the right person for me will come. 
As long as she's happy, I'm happy. 

 

Because I, Park Chanyeol, will always love her unconditionally.
 

The End