Tonight is our last night together. The room is destroyed with broken furniture everywhere, broken picture frames that once framed our two beautiful faces smiling bright smiles, feathers from the pillows strewn in random places, clothes hanging out of their drawers, and two empty suitcases. Two empty suitcases that I have yet to pack. Fragments of my heart are scattered around the room, but I don’t think I’ll be finding them anytime soon.  

-Flashback-

“Baby I-”

“No, Jiyong, I’m not taking this anymore. You know we can’t go on like this.”

“Why not?” I blew out, frustrated. Sure, we both knew this was coming. We’re complete opposites. I’m cold, and you’re warm. I go all in, and you hold back. We were just right for each other but so wrong.

“I-I just can’t, okay?” She ran her fingers through her hair and turned around to walk away from me.

I tensed even more. I just wanted to blow up. I love her. So much. So much, that it hurts and I want to cry out. I can’t let go. No matter what. Before she could leave the room, I grabbed her wrist and turned her around.

Faces inches away from each other, leaning foreheads together, I breathe out, “You can’t leave now. Please. I love you.”

-End of Flashback-

There you are. On the bed, hair strewn around your head like a halo. God, could you be even more perfect? Your lips are so full, and your body. I have no words. My perfect woman, how could it come to this? I love you. Have I mentioned that yet? Oh yeah, like a million times. I remember when we first met.

-Flashback-

“Jiyong, she’ll see you now in her office.” Edna, the receptionist smiled charmingly at me. I was at the bank to be “consulted” by a banker, and quite frankly, Edna was creeping me out. She checked me out every five seconds, even taking the time to boldly meet my eye one time and wink. Too bad I wasn’t interested. To be honest, I wasn’t sure what I was looking for. All girls just threw themselves at me, and went out of their way to please me. I was sick of that. It’s obvious what they’re going for, a night on the town with Kwon Jiyong. Yeah, well none of them are going to get it. I want a good relationship, something real, something tangible. Not some relationship where the girl is just there to please me because I’m hot.

I walked into my new banker, Miss Park’s office. Damn, she’s gorgeous. Snap out of it, Kwon Jiyong, she’s your banker, and of anything, she’s probably like her receptionist.

“Mr. Kwon, you’re late for your appointment.” Miss Park said sternly, as she eyed me warily when I sat down in front of her desk.

That was a first, getting scolded for being late. Hm, well, it’s only a matter of time before she falls for the Kwon Jiyong charm. Let’s get this charm machine started.

“Well, Miss Park, I would feel much more comfortable if you called me by my first name, Jiyong.”

“I very well know your first name, Mr. Kwon, but I prefer to stay on more of a professional level.”

“What’s your first name? Can I guess?” I eyed her name plate, T. Park. T.. What names start with T?

“No, Mr. Kwon. Now let’s get down to business. Your records show you eat out a lot. Perhaps you can cut down on some of your expenses by doing just that.”

“Well, then maybe you’d like to go to lunch with me tomorrow?” I wiggled my eyebrows playfully. Oh come on, she’s got to have some funny bone in her body.

“Mr. Kwon, did you just hear what I said? I just advised you to cut down on eating out.”

“I bet your name is Tia, isn’t it?”

“Mr. Kwon, please.”

“Did I get it right?”

“Mr. Kwon, I’m not joking around here.”

“Alright fine, fine. Tell you what, I’ll make you a deal. You go out to lunch with me tomorrow, and that will be like my final meal out for two years.”

-End of Flashback-

I don’t know how I finally convinced you to go out with me. You probably wanted to go out with me the whole time, but you were just playing hard to get. That’s my guess, though you’d never admit to it.

Before tonight, you asked me why I even bothered to stick around. And my answer was simple, because I didn’t want to give up on our relationship. And truth be told, that is the truth, but now that I come to think of it, there wasn’t a whole lot I was telling you.

I’m scared of starting over.

You’re perfect. You understand me, you’re able to see through my cool guy façade. And most of all, you accept me for who I am. You’re like my safety net. You know like when you go to Church and you always try to sit in the same spot every time, just because it would be a different view from another spot? I wouldn’t feel comfortable kissing anyone else, or smelling someone else’s hair, or holding someone else as tight as I hold you. I want tonight to last forever, so I can stay here and bask in your beauty. To be able to say I was with you until the very last minute that I could. I never really liked the dark so much, but tonight, it’s all I want to see. I pray for daylight to never come, because when it does, this will all be over. I’ll have to start all over again. Without you.

So tonight, I’m going to hold you close to me. Pretend like everything is alright with us. I know it’s late, and I know you’re sleeping, but I won’t. I won’t close my eyes, for fear of losing you. I won’t sleep to take every moment I can to remember your every detail, your eyes, the way your neck meets your collar, your long eyelashes.

I’m leaving so you can be free of me. So you can live without the burden of putting up with me. So you can find another man, who you don’t have to constantly fight with. I know you’ll be upset, because you feel our connection too. And I know you love me, but I figure, if I just disappear, you won’t have to worry too much. Maybe you’ll be heartbroken for awhile, but soon, you’ll find that happiness. I know you will. Guys will be vying for you left and right.

So when the daylight comes, I’ll leave you. Then, we’ll both be on our own. But for tonight, I’ll hold you close.

Baby, I love you.