Chaerin’s POV

We just finished our interview with FTV. We do lots of interviews since we’re going to debut here in US. It’s tiring but we enjoy it, this is our dream. We worked hard for it. We waited for this for years.

 We just arrived in our hotel room. I take a sit on our couch while drinking soda. I’m really tired. I want to take my bath. I want to remove my thick makeup..  I want to change my clothes into pajamas.. and most of all I want to lay down in my bed with Dara and sleep. Dara is in the bathroom she take her bath first.

 Dara and I share a room. I always like to share room with her. Even if I can have my own room I just always choose to share with her. I want to sleep beside her. I want to spend our little free time with her. I want to talk.. laugh.. stare.. with her, only the two of us. Being with her makes me relax. Whenever I’m with her and only the two of us I always get into my real self. I can show her my soft side… my cute side not the fierce one…. I can cry on her whenever I feel too much pressure of being a leader… I can tell her my true feelings…  I can show her the one I can’t show in front of everybody…

True feelings… yes.. I always tell her my true feelings… but one thing I can’t tell her… my feelings for her… It started these crazy feelings I have for her before we debuted as 2NE1 and it grows until she became my world… my everything… my life… my joy… my all. During our training days I thought I just care for her because she’s nice. I like her as my unnie, but my feelings for her grew up until… I finally admit to myself that I’m in love with her.

It’s been years since I found out to myself that I love her more than I love myself. I want to tell her about my feelings and I want to know if she loves me too, but I’m afraid of consequences. If I’ll tell her I might lose her. Loose our friendship that we have, although I don’t really treat her as my friends coz she’s special to me. she owns my heart without her knowing it.

“CL-roo? Are you ok?” she sits beside me. she just interrupt my thoughts.

“yes.. I’m fine..” I smile at her. hmmm… I can smell her perfume. Her scent makes me insane. It’s like a drug to me. Smelling her every time we sleep together makes me high. She’s using my favorite scent of her. Since the day I told her it’s my favorite scent of her she always use that perfume, and it makes me more insane than usual.

“I’m done.. You should take your bath.. I already fill the tub with warm water so you can relax I know you’re tired.” She said while drinking my soda… yes she drinks my soda. She always do that, drinking in my glass… in my bottle… drinking where I’m drinking..

“Thank you ssantokki.. I should take my bath” I said and leave her. Right now I’m enjoying my bath that Dara made for me. How can I not fall for her? Before she left the bathroom she prepared my water. It’s just one of her doings to me whenever where alone… without Bom or Minzy… without camera. Sometimes I’m thinking if she loves me too. I can feel her love for me. Different from her love to Bom or Minzy. I feel special. But still I’m afraid to confess.

Knock… knock…

“Cl-roo.. Bom called me she said they will go here in our room to eat late dinner.. is it ok with you? Or you want us to go to their room instead?” she said behind the door. I can still hear her even if she has soft voice.

“it’s fine with me… you should order lots of food for Bom I bet she’s hungry as a monster right now” I’m allowing Bom sometimes to eat a lot she deserves it. Food is her life.

After 30 minutes I finished my bath. I took a sit beside Dara.

“Bom and Minzy will come here in a few minutes and also our food” she said.

I just stare at her. If only I could do this even when we’re outside I’ll do it. Sometimes I just find myself staring at her even when were in stage… specially when we’re having interview I can’t control my eyes they just keep on staring at her when she’s talking I guess my eyes have its own mind… not only my eyes.. my lips always smile whenever I see her. I try to control not to smile widely luckily my lips obey me a….. little.. so my lips always form simple smile.. but sometimes I can’t help but to give her a big smile.. I always laugh at her whenever she’s saying funny.. or acting cute.. I do really love her. My love for her deepens as days goes by.

Now she’s also staring at me. How long did we staring at each other? I want to speak.. but.. my lips don’t like to move. I guess if I speak I’ll just ruin this moment. Suddenly she smiles at me. Her eyes.. the way she looks at me.. there’s  love.

Knock… knock… knock…

We broke our stare as we heard somebody is knocking at our door. Dara stand up immediately to look whose knocking. It’s Bom and Minzy together with our food.

“Dara… remember the guy who interviewed us?”

“uhmm.. why?”

“I think he’s your fanboy. The way he stares at you tells it”

I look at Dara she’s blushing. she’s the kind of person who always blushed immediately. I also saw that stare. From the moment we arrived and sit he’s always staring at Dara intensely. That’s why I put my arms around her in the beginning of our interview I want him to know that Dara is mine and he shouldn’t stare at her like that. i remove my hand in the middle of our interview but I put it back again. He’s always staring at her and I don’t like it. She’s mine.

After we finished eating our late dinner Bom and Minzy go back to their room and have their rest. Dara and I are already lying in our bed. Tam-tam is in our middle sleeping.

“unnie?” i turn to face her. she also turn to face me. now I’m looking deeply in her eyes. I need to tell her that I love her. Everyday her numbers of fanboys are growing. I want her to be mine. Everyday numbers of my rivals on her are growing. I don’t want her in others arm but mine. I can’t stand it anymore. I’m jealous every time I see someone is staring at her.

“hmm”

“i don’t like the way he stares at you”

“who?”

“the one who interviewed us..”

“why?”

“I just don’t like it.. I should be the only one who will stare at you like that”

“w-w-what? Do you mean?” She's staring at me confused. this is it Chaerin.. you've already started it so go!!

“dara… listen carefully.. i.. I .. have something to tell you.. I’ve been keeping this for years and I can’t take it anymore..” She’s looking at me. she’s not saying any word. she’s waiting for me to continue.

“Dara please promise me.. what ever happen we’re still friends.. I don’t want to lose you..” i'm afraid what we'll she react but i can't take it anymore.

“Chae… ok I promise..” she said. she's looking at me seriously.

“Dara… i… i….”

ring... ring.. ring...

Dara's phone rings....