no more resolutions

only tears

 

2010

You, Mari, and Daehoon crammed into the couch.

"It's starting!" Mari announced, pointing to the tv screen.

"I can't believe this is actually happening," Daehoon said. "I should have tried out to Woollim, too..."

Then, the show began. You Are My Oppa began playing. Sungkyu appeared on the screen.

"Him! I know him!" you exclaimed, jumping up on the couch.

"Wow, I know an idol!" Mari said, jumping with you.

Daehoon stayed down on the couch. "Tch. Girls."

-

The four of you were eating dinner at a restaurant. It was the first time in weeks all of you could meet up together, because of a certain someone's suddenly busy schedule...

"And here's to Sungkyu, for becoming a true artist," Mari beamed, raising her glass.

"You mean for capturing girls' hearts?" Daehoon joked. Sungkyu punched his arm.

"No, he's not even the most popular one! I think the girls will fall in love with the tall one--or the one who took off his shirt in the music video," you predicted. Sungkyu laughed and covered his face.

"Anyway," Mark said. "To Sungkyu."

-

After dinner, you had to drive Sungkyu back to his dorm.

"...and I start the job next week," you said, glancing at Sungkyu. He looked half asleep already. "Yah, Kim Sungkyu, are you listening?" You made the car swerve to wake him up.

"I'm awake--I'm awake!" he yelled, grabbing your hand and turning the steering wheel back.

"Now you're awake," you pouted. Sungkyu pretended not to hear. He yawned and stared out the window. You reached the dorm, but a group of young girls was standing outside, so you drove around to the back. By the time you were parked, Sungkyu had fallen asleep again.

"Sungkyu. Kyu. Wake up," you said, shaking his arm. He didn't respond. "You're always so sleepy but you never even do anything," you hissed. You had to get out of your seat and open the passenger door. You leaned into the car and yelled, "I know you hear me. Get up!"

Sungkyu yawned and turned the other way. But you saw him open his eyelids slightly.

"What do those fangirls see in you? Sung--" You slapped his arm but lost your balance and ended up falling into the car. You put an arm in front of yourself to stop yourself from falling, but were already uncomfortably close to Sungkyu. He opened his eyes. The two of you stared at each other awkwardly for a second.

You got up quickly and bit your lips. "Good night."

-

Sungkyu quietly snuck back into his room and closed the door behind him. He didn't dare turn the lights on. He crept closer to his bed, when something grabbed his legs.

"Ah!" he yelled, falling to the floor. "Woohyun!"

"Hyung," Woohyun hissed. "What were you doing out so late?"

"None of your business. Go to sleep," Sungkyu whispered, kicking Woohyun away.

"Hyung," Woohyun whispered again, crawling over to Sungkyu. "Were you meeting a girl?"

"It's none of your business--"

"It's totally a girl. Wow, Kim Sungkyu--"

"I never said--" The door opened. Sungkyu suddenly stopped talking. Both of them froze, afraid of what the managers might do if they realized Sungkyu came home late.

"What's up?" Dongwoo said, crawling in. Sungkyu and Woohyun gave a sigh of relief.

"So what's going on in here?" Hoya asked, crawling in behind Dongwoo. He pushed the door close behind him.

"Why are you guys here?" Woohyun whined.

"Ouch, you closed the door on me," Myungsoo complained, rubbing his forehead.

"Go back to sleep! All of you!" Sungkyu ordered, pushing Dongwoo off of him.

"Sungkyu, where were you?"

"He was meeting a girl," Woohyun answered.

"I was not--"

"Is she pretty?"

"What's her name?"

"I don't have a girlfriend," Sungkyu hissed.

"Woah, who ever said girlfriend? You must really like her," Hoya said. Sungkyu sighed and buried his face in his pillow.

"Go to sleep."

"Not until Hyung tells us who the girl is!"

"Yeah, who is she?"

"I was just out with friends," Sungkyu whined.

"Omo! Does that mean you were with Yiseul?" Woohyun asked. Sungkyu didn't reply.

"I thought you were trying to get over her," Dongwoo said.

"I was..." Sungkyu said. He sat up and thought about it. My resolution was to get over Yiseul. And I did, right? I dated other girls and now I'm focusing on Infinite. "Yiseul and I are just friends now."

"You were just friends before, too," Myungsoo pointed out.

"But this time we're both more mature. We know who we are and what we want so we're not going to get into a stupid relationship again."

"But do you like her?" Hoya asked.

It really all goes back to that, doesn't it?

"Yiseul and I are just--" Sungkyu stopped and remembered what happened when you were dropping him off. He recognized your anxious expression.

And just as if Woohyun had read Sungkyu's mind, he asked, "Does Yiseul think that, too?"

"She's the one who broke up with me last year!"

"But you're not a loser anymore," Dongwoo stated.

"Excuse me?"

"Sorry, hyung," Dongwoo said, patting Sungkyu's head.

Woohyun wanted more from Sungkyu, so he slyly asked, "Well if you and Yiseul aren't an item, do you think I could--"

"Yah, stay away from her!" Sungkyu exclaimed, pinning Woohyun down.

"Shh! You'll wake everyone up!" Myungsoo warned.

"Ha! So you do like her," Woohyun said.

"Yeah, so what? It's not like I can date," Sungkyu admitted in defeat. The four others were silent. Dongwoo patted Sungkyu on the shoulder now.

"Leader-nim, just do this for yourself. Everything will work out." And with that, Dongwoo left the room.

"Stay strong," Myungsoo encouraged, leaving the room.

"I think you should go after her. It's not like the managers can literally break the two of you apart," Hoya said, closing the door behind him.

"Should I go after her again?" Sungkyu asked Woohyun.

"Sure. And if it doesn't work out, you'll still be friends, right?" Woohyun yawned and went to his bed. "What's the worst that can happen, anyway?"

Sungkyu made up his mind.

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Kwoncentrated
#1
Chapter 26: Oh my god... I was browsing random fics and I came across this one. I'm so glad I read it! I normally don't like "you" fics, but I gave it a shot because of Sungkyu lol. Good job, author-nim! <3
isaaabellesno1 #2
Chapter 26: GOOD JOB AUTHOR-NIM.
THIS IS DEFINITELY FAVORITE
NOONA, SARANGHAE.
singurl #3
Chapter 26: Really loves this.. the best fanfic about gyu so far..

Kim Sungkyu.
You were my best friend.
My favorite singer.
My boyfriend.
My future husband.
And then, just like that, you were nothing to me.
You were nothing to the world, but now look at you.

This statement really tears my hard enough..
Daefattie
#4
Chapter 26: Waaaaaaah!
This is so sad! ㅠ_ㅠ
I wish they would've end up together! D;
But good job, author-nim! <3
Sungtothegyu
#5
Chapter 26: ONE OF THE MOST (I DONTKNOW HOW SHOULD I SAY IT) THE BEST(?) PERHAPS BETTER THAN "THE BEST". REALLY. AND I TOOK MY TIME READING THE COMMENTS MADE MY DAWNBYEOL BELOW AND I GOTTA AGREE 100% WHAT SHEVE STATED. IMEAN REALLY. ITS JUST SO REALISTIC AND OTS JUST SO SADTHAT THEYCOULDNT BE TGHT. SO SAD. GAH I DIDNT CRY BUT I NEARLY WHENI READ THE WHOLE STORY. (I STARTED READING THIS FIC TODAY AND FINISHED IT TODAY,YOU SEE HOW NICE YOUR STORY WAS?? ;_;) AND THIS STORY MADE ME REALISE THAT, "OH MAYBE THIS IS PFOBABLY HOW INFINITE DEAL WITH PROBLEMS" AND FOR A MINUTE, I ACTUALLY BELIEVED THT MAYBE SUNGGYU REALLY HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALRD? IKNOW ITS SAD TOKNOW IF ITS TRUE BUT,THIS STORY MADEME REALISE AND MADE FEEL MORE PREPARED TO KNOW THAT WHAT IF INFINITE REALLY IS IN A R/S. WELL,THIS STORY MADE ME REALISE EVRYTHING. BECAUSE JUST WHEN I THOUGHT TODAY I WAS HAVING A BAD DAY BECAUSE I KEPT THINKING "WHY DO I EVEN LOVE INFINITE {SUNGGYU) SO MUCH UNTIL I WISHED HIM TO BE MINE?" YOU SEEI HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND WHT IM SAYING. I JUST WANT TO SAY, YOURE A WONDERFUL AUTHOR AND THAT THIS STORY WAS A WAKE UP CALL FOR ME. i.e (UNDERSTANDING THE LIFE OF OUR IDOLS) THIS STORY MAY BE TRUE. MIGHT NOT BE INFINITE BUT IM SURE TO OTHER KPOP IDOLS. 10 STARS FOR YOU:-)
dawnbyeol
#6
Chapter 26: love you for writing this. All the feels I've gone through. I always read it right anyway when I got on aff. It would be the first updated story I'd click because I was always hoping for some kind of miracle that everything between Sunggyu and Yiseul would be okay. It hurts so much, sobs. Thank you for writing this! I am DEFINITELY looking forward to some more stories from you with Infinite. Thank you for making me cry so hard for, like, half an hour, and thank you for making me think of Infinite in a different way. Making me think that maybe they're going through a lot of pain and suffering and heartbreak like I am. OH, I also wanted to say that...maybe Sunggyu didn't want to stay with her as a punishment. He's punishing himself for not being able to be by her side...by NOT being by her side and staying with her. Man, I hope it doesn't sound as complicated as it's starting to. But...yeah, thank you. You are wonderful! You are a great writer! Please continue writing! :3 I'm glad I stuck to this story until the end. I feel special ^^ Thank you! :)
dawnbyeol
#7
Chapter 26: I'M SO DONE. I'M DEAD. I'M CRYING SO HARD. YOU KNOW, IT'S REALLY HARD TO READ WHEN (i type in capitals i know) YOU HAVE TEARS IN YOUR EYES? BUT LUCKY FOR YOU, I CAN TYPE WITHOUT LOOKING. I CAN'T. KSDHFLADFKLSDHGKHLDGHAGHKKGHKLADHKLAFHGLAFHGKLAGHKLAFG I'M SOBBING SO HARD. I'M WEEPING. I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW I'M TYPING. I WOULD LIKE TO INFORM YOU THAT...in the process of me blowing my nose really hard (because i'm crying so hard), I ended up having a nosebleed. It really hurts a lot...I'm starting to calm down. I don't know why, but I burst out crying when Yiseul said (in chapter 25), "I don't keep in touch with Sunggyu anymore" I DON'T KNOW WHY. I was just remembering all the times that they were together. The first time she heard him sing. When he would sing all his songs to her. When they would be on their dates and he would sing. (sorry, it's all about the singing). And I cried so hard when I got to the other half of that chapter, when they went to the concert. "Sunggyu, you'll always be my favourite singer." WOW I CAN'T EVEN...WOW THAT MADE ME CRY SO HARD. THEN, ALL THOSE MOMENTS OF HIM SINGING TO HER WHEN THEY WERE ALONE MADE ME CRY. Everything is fine the way it is...sobs...your writing, I mean. THE OTHER PART...that set me off...was "Kim Sunggyu...you were my best friend. My favourite singer. My boyfriend. My future husband." OH GOSH RIGHT IN THE FEELS BECAUSE "MY FUTURE HUSBAND" HOW DO TWO PEOPLE END UP LIKE THIS?? I don't know how to elaborate anymore...this is taking me forever to write. It's weird, it always confuses me. How do two people who were best friends to lovers turn into this? They have a special bond. I guess that's a representation of it when the two look at each other. I can't think straight right now...I'll come back a few days...or weeks...and put a proper comment of these last two chapters. Let me sort out my feels. But please let me thank you. You are wonderful. As much as I hurt with all this crying and emotions and everything, I still-
dawnbyeol
#8
They want the other to be happy, so why would they want to drag them down with their own problems? Okay, but now, I'll go back to being my fangirly self. BUT YISEUL AND SUNGGYU ARE MEANT TO BE (okay, maybe not, but in my head, yes). THEY HAVE TO BE TOGETHER. THEY NEED TO MAKE MORE MEMORIES. SUNGGYU NEEDS TO SING SOME MORE SONGS TO HER WITH HIS BEAUTIFUL VOICE. AND YISEUL NEEDS TO HUM ALONG, OR SOMETHING. THEY NEED TO KISS EACH OTHER, AND TELL EACH OTHER THAT THEY'LL BE TOGETHER NO MATTER WHAT EVEN IF SHE'LL HAVE FANS AFTER HER. But...no...that's not how life works. You can't ALWAYS have perfect endings. I just...this is all so realistic...and it gets to me...right in the heart...and I can tell that they won't end up together. I JUST KNOW IT AND IT HURTS SO BAD KGLDFHKLAHDFKLFHKSAF ;AAAAAAA; I'M GONNA CRY. I KNOW I WILL. I HOPE YOU ENJOYED MY LONG COMMENTS ABOUT EVERYTHING I NEED TO SAY ABOUT YOUR FANFIC. I'm sorry, I'm, like, taking up all this space...and I probably will when I read the last two chapters...to play "Only Tears" in the background, or not to play it...that is the real question. Okay...let me prepare myself for (only) tears. Thank you, author-nim, for writing this. You are wonderful! :3
dawnbyeol
#9
but they can imagine situations with different perspectives. But I realize now that it was because they were both SO IN LOVE with each other and thought that everything would be okay with each other that it didn't work. Sunggyu can never truly be there for her, but Yiseul still stuck to him because she loved him. lsdhkfgklsdhklsdfhlasdfhlksd iT HURTS ME. Um, so, let me remember Chapter 24...wow...idk if I can remember, lol...OH YEAH, so, I understand why Sunggyu wants to break up with her. Like I said, he knows he can't truly ever be there for her...but the truth is (this is just my opinion, lol) he's underestimating himself? He CAN be there for her if he just put more effort. Maybe he doesn't love her as much as she loves him? I don't think that's the case, but he IS a coward for running away from...well, love. Why though? omg that is what frustrates me. I don't know why he can't just TRY. Yiseul is trying. She trusts him. She doesn't complain about how they have to hide their relationship. So, why can't Sunggyu???? GAH, author-nim, I'm not trying to make you feel bad about your writing, or anything. and I hope I haven't! ;AAAA; It's just that I'm such an emotional wreck with a weak heart when it comes to stories about love!!! ;AAAA; And the ending to chapter 24 (man, I'm looking at it through an open tab, haha, I'm such a cheater)...I'm sobbing forever. B-but...b-but...Yiseul and Sunggyu...they...n-need to...be together. Wow, though, as much as I hate two main characters not being together, I understand their situation, and it's very realistic. People move on. They try to forget (even if they never really do). They are able to find happiness again, maybe not as...TRUE as before...but close enough, right? LOL sorry I'm getting so unsentimental now. I understand it though. Usually, two people in relationships don't want to tell the other what they're going through because they don't want to seem selfish. They don't want the other to feel bad and have pity on them.
dawnbyeol
#10
Hi, I'm back ^^ Haha, so, I decided to comment one more time before reading the final two chapters. Um, I'm gonna do this based off of my memory haha. Let's see how well I do, but I'll probably come back and clean up my comments >< Um, so, I can't begin to tell you how much I love this story. It's so simple, yet it's so deep. ((gee, I'm a big er for stories like that)) Every time a new chapter would be posted up, with all the tears, all the break ups, all the sad times with Infinite, Sunggyu, and Yiseul, I would always go back to the first chapter where Yiseul is at the concert, and I just...imagine...that somehow they would find each other again and realize that they are meant to be together. (I don't believe in destiny or anything like that though) They broke up and went out with more people, but still, their feelings for each other hadn't actually changed. Gah, it hurts so much just thinking about. They always think someone else could make they happy, but in my opinion, they can only be truly happy with each other because of all the memories they've made, and that's what keeps the relationship they imagine with each other alive. When Woohyun told Sunggyu how great of a girlfriend he had, that totally made my heart break. (I'm doing this from memory, haha, so I'll probably be wrong) "How Sungyeol was rejected because of his busy schedule, how Sungjong wasn't able to confess before their debut, how Dongwoo was dumped after two years, how Woohyun ended his relationship days before debut, how Hoya was broken up with weeks after their debut, and how Myungsoo was rejected by his first love because of her disapproving parents." That totally changed my mentality of Infinite. Now, I imagine all the heartbreak they've gone through just for us. They might all be in love with someone, but they can't because of us. But anyway, back to Sunggyu and Yiseul. I feel like sometimes they're too alike to be together. They both think a lot, analyze things in their own perspective-