Dear Kangin-no, Youngwoon,

I know its hard for everyone. Especially Super Junior. They're my everything. My family, friends, love. I can't bear not being with them and you for the next two years, but I have to.

I want to go to the military, I truely do. Its not that I want to leave the idol world, its just that being a proud soldier is a dream all Korean men have. The only thing holding me back from celebrating is that I can't be with my friends and family for a long time.

The day before I left was the first time I really felt that I was leaving.

I was packing to leave, neatly arranging my clothes in my bags when Donghae burst into my room. He was laughing with Hyukjae chasing him.

"Hyung! How's it going with the luggage?" Donghae asked.

I smiled gently at him and ruffled his brown hair, "Its going well. You guys okay?"

They just nodded and shared identical grins. I could hint the sadness, but I knew they were happy that I could achieve my dream.

I walked down the hall and into the living room to greet the remaining members. It was like a normal Monday; Kyuhyun and Sungmin playing Starcraft, Siwon on the phone with Kibum talking about some script, Shindong practicing a rap, Yesung taking care of his turtles, Ryeowook video chatting with Henry and Zhoumi. The only piece missing from this perfect picture was you.

As all of the kids-our kids- greeted me, I felt happy. Content, almost, because I knew that they would survive without me, at least for two years. They had grown up to be mature, responsible adults. We had raised them well.

My happiness lasted only until I reached your room. That's when I heard your muffled crying. I could almost see the tears dripping from your blood shot eyes. I know you don't like people watching you cry; that you like to uphold your manly image, but I couldn't step away from the closed door.

It hit me then. At that time, all that seperated us was a wood door, but soon enough, we would be seperated by hundreds of miles, and I wouldn't be able to comfort you. You would be all alone with no one to rely on and no love to support you.

It hurt and crushed my soul as well as my heart. I couldn't bear leaving you to suffer like that. I know I suprised you when I burst into your room and I'm sorry for that, but I needed to hold you and be held by you.

I remember kissing you and whispering apologies as I sobbed in your arms with you. I remember you rocking me back and forth all the while cradling my head on your chest. I remember when the other members found us and cried with us, huddling together into a mangle of limbs and wet faces.

The only thing I don't remember is whether I said I love you or not. So I'll say it now.

Kim Youngwoon. Kim Kangin. Whatever name you go by, whatever distance seperates us, I'll always love you. Whether or not we are thrown into hell, or persecuted by heaven, you are my everything; my happiness, heart, and soul. So wait for me and know this while doing so. You are not alone. I am with you every step of the way. Its not forever and I'll be back. Patience is a virtue.

Your's Forever,

Park Jungsu

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No one's POV

Kangin gripped his hair, sobbing. Some tears landed on the letter, darkening the paper wherever it touched. He had come home the day Leeteuk left to find the letter sitting on his desk, next to his copy of Super Junior's first album. He hadn't told the members yet, but he would soon. As soon as he could speak properly without breaking down.

But Kangin knew that his love was right. That it wasn't the end of the world. They would reunite one day, but until then, he had to remember that he, Kim Youngwoon, was inside Park Jungsu's heart, and that Park Jungsu was inside Kim Youngwoon's heart also. This didn't make the pain any less sharp, but he could and would endure it. After all, patience is a virtue.