“…if you leave right now, I won’t allow you to come back…”

*Yawn*

I awoke from a dream to hear Seungho snoring up a storm.  “Seungho,” I moaned half-heartedly nudging his arm.  We celebrated his birthday late into the night so I stayed with him.  I couldn’t be happier that Seungho wasn’t stuck sharing a room with any of the members like Thunder and Mir.  He slightly open his eyes then rolled partially on top of me wanting to go back to sleep.  “Ugh, get off of me,” I pushed him and heard him laugh above me.  His eyes were shut tighter than before; clearly my efforts were futile.  I managed to escape from his grasp and crawl out of bed.  I dragged the covers with me hoping the lack of blanket would get him up.  He always slept only in his boxers and I figured the exposure to the cold room would assist me but he just stole the blanket back.  I was freezing standing there in my undergarments and one of his wife beaters.  My dress was across the room draped over a chair by his computer desk.  I glanced at my reflection in the mirror, seeing my hair was a mess and I had lines on my face from sleeping on Seungho’s arm.  I checked my phone that was charging by his laptop and saw it was about 9 AM.  Luckily it was a Saturday and I didn’t need to be at work until later in the day, but I couldn’t so much say the same thing for him.  They had a big performance coming up that they had to prepare for like crazy.  Yesterday seemed like their only day off in a long time and I could only spend part of the day with him due to my classes. 
“Mmm, come back to bed,” he grumbled, throwing a pillow my way without even looking. 
“You have to come get me,” I challenged him.  Maybe once he had to physically get up he’d stay awake. 
“Nooo don’t make me move,” he begged.  He pouted his lips and rolled closer to where I was just close enough to grab ahold of the shirt I was wearing.  He tugged and tugged until he could pull me over and back into his arms. 
“Ahh!” I playfully shouted out, bursting into giggles from instantly falling back in bed.  He pulled the covers over and wrapped me inside like a burrito. 
“You can’t leave now,” he joked, nuzzling his nose against the back of my head.  I tumbled around in my new cocoon to see him with a sleepy smile.  Nothing was more attractive to me than him in a just out of bed state.  His hair was sticking out in all directions and the shadows under his eyes were dark but it was him in his most natural state.  His lips never seemed more kissable, aside from the morning breath, from when he woke up.  I pecked them gently but pulled away before he got the full taste.  I wasn’t exactly the happiest to be in the blanketed contraption.  I stuck my tongue out at him then shimmied the opposite direction but was stopped by him throwing his leg over me.  My one weakness: a submission hold.  As much as I tried to fight it he captured my lips.  We smooched until there was a loud knock at the door.

*Knock Knock* 

“Hyung!  Noona!  Come eat breakfast!”  It was clearly Mir shouting on the other side.  I could hear his feet patter away right after saying it.   We both sighed wanting to play a little longer but Seungho had told me in the past that Mir was rather persistent.  He helped me out of my blanket burrito and checked through his drawers. 
“Wear this.”  He handed me an ‘I Love MBLAQ’ t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants.  I felt so warm being in his clothes and relieved I didn’t need to wear a dress to breakfast.  He seemed pleased to see me in them as well, smirking as he brushed the lose strands of hair out of my face.  I watched him slip on a shirt and pants, smirking at his cute tummy.  He was a bit self-conscious about it but I loved it.  Once he changed he escorted me out of the room and to the breakfast table. 

We were the last ones to get there.  G.O. was at the stove wearing an apron and flipping eggs in a pan.  Mir was hopping around trying to be a help but seemed to be more of a hindrance while Thunder was asleep on the table.  Changsun was happily awaiting breakfast until he saw me come in the room then his smile dropped to a frown.  I felt terrible he had so much animosity against me but I couldn’t blame him.  There can’t be any worse of a feeling than seeing your ex dating a ‘coworker’ let alone a close friend.  It’s not like I ever expected it would happen.  I hadn’t even realized Seungho was in the same group until long after we started dating.  For a girl living in South Korea let’s just say I was pretty out of the loop with Kpop groups.  Part of the blame however is on him for never bringing me around to meet them in the extent of our relationship.  If he would have, there’s a very good chance we’d still be together. 
“Oh look it’s the love birds,” G.O. commented noticing us sit down.  Mir plopped down beside me and hugged my arm. 
“Good morning Noona!”  I couldn’t quite understand how he could have so much energy in the morning let alone his random attachment to me. 
“Behave,” Seungho scolded Mir shooting him a glare.  He held my hand and kissed the back to claim ownership.  It seemed to disgust Changsun; I felt bad. 
“You two were too loud last night, I couldn’t sleep,” a drowsy Thunder droned. 
“Oooo you two were busy weren’t you,” Mir smirked.  He received a smack to the head from Seungho. 
“None of your business,” Seungho teased.  While Mir and Seungho had some fake battle I couldn’t help but turn my attention to Changsun.

“How are you feeling today Joon?”  It felt so weird to call him that and I knew he hated it.  He always loved when I called him Changsun or oppa or our various pet names for eachother but now I had to act informal.  His eyes showed what I feared he felt. 
“I’m just wonderful.”  His sarcasm was snappy accompanied by a scowl.  I’m rather happy everyone else missed that face. 

“Okay, it’s ready!”  G.O. waited for Mir to grab a stack of plates then he handed out portions.  Along with the eggs was a bowl of rice, some assortment of eat and various vegetables.  Mir acted as a waiter setting the food in front of us.  Seungho got up to help G.O. take off his apron. 
“I should have told you this is my wife,” Seungho joked to me, giving G.O. a quick hug.  I laughed.  They sat down and we were ready to eat.
“Please enjoy,” G.O. announced.  We dug into the meal.  Everyone except Changsun seemed happily immersed in bites and light conversations.  I felt like I was on a firing squad of questions that I somehow avoided yesterday.  They were simple things like ‘where are you from’ and ‘what is your favorite song’ but I wasn’t fully in the mood.  Seungho would whisper cute comments in my ear when I wouldn’t quite understand a joke or a statement.  Changsun hadn’t contributed anything, not that I wanted him to exactly.  As each of us were close to finishing the topic changed.

“Hyung, I’m jealous you have such a nice girlfriend.”  Mir pouted. 
“Hey, I have a girlfriend too you know!”  Thunder punched him in the arm.  “JaeMin would be offended.”
“Oh, I forgot about her.  You never bring her over here so how am I supposed to remember?”
“I don’t bring her here because you’d scare her away.”  He stuck his tongue out.  They got into a playful hitting battle.
“Well aside from that it is nice to see a girl over here for once,” G.O. chimed in ignoring the dongsaengs’ sissy fight. 
“G.O. always brings women back but they leave before morning,” Seungho remarked. 
“I guess I can’t debate that one,” he agreed.
“The last time we had a woman stick around was a girl Joon dated back when we debuted.”  He actually introduced a girl to his friends?  What a stab to the heart to find that out.  I glared at him and he knew it, trying to dodge my eyes.  He looked like a deer caught in headlights. 

“We’re going to be late for practice,” Changsun abruptly ended the conversation by standing up and leaving the table. 
“What’s with him?”  Seungho asked G.O. who shrugged his shoulders.   
“I’m not sure but maybe we should get ready.”  He checked his watch. 
“Alright, I guess I’ll get Alex home now then and meet everyone at the practice room.” 
Everyone departed.  Seungho and I went to his room to gather my things.  Since everyone was busy getting themselves ready I didn’t get a chance to say goodbye but I knew I’d see them again.  I called “See you later” as we walked out the door. 

--

“They’re an interesting bunch aren’t they,” Seungho chuckled.  I rested my head against the headrest in the passenger’s seat of his car.  I was twisting the seatbelt strap around my hand in an attempt to calm my mind.
“Yeah,” I sighed, staring out the window at the buildings we passed by.
“See I told you they’d like you.”  He rubbed my lower back with his free hand.  He tended to drive with one hand on the wheel.  All I did was give him a reassuring smile.  I didn’t have much to say but he clearly wanted to chat.  “You know, there’s something I’ve been curious about.”
He had my attention.  “What is it?”
“You’ve never told me about your past relationships before.  I was thinking about it when I brought up Joon’s ex.”  The statement threw me off.
“Umm.. there’s not much to say about it,” I quickly came responded. 
“C’mon, I’d like to know my competition.  I want to make sure I don’t screw up like they did.”
“You’re already doing a much better job, I promise.” 
“I remember the night I met you that you had said something about a man treating you wrong.  Shall I hunt him down?”
If only he knew how close that ‘man’ was already.  “No, they aren’t worth the time.” 
“Are you sure?  You should give me a name just in case he tries to get you back.”
I didn’t know how to answer.  Luckily just then we arrived at my apartment.  I quickly reached to grab my dress from the backseat.  I unbuckled my belt and opened the car door.
“Why are you in such a hurry?”  He pouted.  “Are you that anxious to leave me?”
“It looks bad when a leader is late for practice.”  It was a good excuse I must say.
“I suppose you’re right.”  He leaned in close to receive a kiss.  No matter how much was on my mind his kiss always seemed to ease it.  He always snuck a second or third one in there.  “Call me later.” 
“Don’t practice too hard.”  I smiled as I got out of the car and watched him drive away. 

I needed a nap.

***

Joon’s P.O.V.

I curled some dumbbells waiting for dance practice to begin.  I didn’t even bother waiting for anyone else to leave the dorm; I had to get out of there.  Each time I raised the weights over my head another thought came rushing through my mind.  I wanted so much to forget the world around me and get out my frustrations by building my body.  Everyone wonders why I exercise so much but it’s just my way of escaping.  This morning I was struggling to keep steady breaths and could feel my arms cramping up.  I set the weights down and nearly just sat against the mirror wall.  G.O, Thunder and Mir came walking in all full of energy.  It made me sick. 
“Yay we get to dance today,” Mir skipped around.  Like always he was quick to come to my side but I always dreaded it.  I could swear he was in love with me.
“Hyung,” he whined, “I’m so lonely.  Seungho has Alex noona, Thunder has JaeMin, and G.O. has every woman in Seoul.  We should date.”  Was he serious?  I pushed him over. 
“Ya, are you sick?!  You like men now?”
“I only like you…” 
“Just ignore him.  Mir is just jealous,” G.O. advised.  I was happy he stepped in.  “Not going to lie though, if Seungho wasn’t dating her I’d probably try to steal her.  She’s just my type.”  I take it back. 
“I wonder how much Seungho has done with her already.”  Mir’s curiousity just set me off. 
“How about you just shut up.”  I didn’t care how harsh I came off.  I wanted to strangle the kid.  He realized it and got to his feet. 
“Sheesh I don’t want to date someone so mean,” he muttered then left.  I laid down stretching my legs in the air while waiting for Seungho.  I just wanted to melt on the floor and fade away.  I couldn’t get her expression out of my mind from this morning when they mentioned me bringing a girl to them to meet before.  The girl practically had me whipped and I didn’t have a choice.  She wanted to know every person in my life and everything I did.  If I hadn’t called her every hour of the day she threatened to leave me.  I obeyed her every wish and hoped she’d do the same for me but she ended up cheating and taking a lot of my money.  I thought we were meant to be but she took my heart and threw it away.  I’ve struggled to trust a girl ever since.

For that reason I always kept tabs on Alex.  It’s not that she did anything to disobey my trust; in fact she stayed by my side faithfully.  I tried to let her be a little freer but I always got nervous.  As a university student she was surrounded by men all the time.  She said back home she always tended to have more male friends but that they meant nothing to her.  I was afraid of men trying to steal her from me so I, in a sense, kept her locked away.  I probably should’ve treated her better and buy her things but I didn’t want to be used.  I know I did wrong but I can’t believe she would stab me in the back like this.  I can’t forgive her for falling in love with Seungho.  A part of me can’t forgive Seungho for dating her even when he didn’t know.  I could feel tears swelling up in my eyes but I couldn’t let them see.  Checking the door there was still no sign of Seungho so I headed to the restroom and have a minute alone.  I let the tears drip freely the second I was unseen.  My vision in the mirror was blurry through my watery eyes.  I had to calm down and make it through.  When I exited the restroom I ran into Seungho speedily walking through the door.

“Is everyone in there already?” He asked. 
“Yeah.”