A/N: I didn't write the romanization but instead, I wrote the translation so it's understandable.

“Don't wait anymore please, take my heart instead”

I sit in the corner of my bedroom, eyes blank, expressing no feeling at all. Although my eyes are starting to well with tears–tears that express my feelings, tears that hold my pain, I don't seem to notice it. And even though the soft, melodic voice of Byun Baekhyun is singing softly to me, directly from my speakers, I can't seem to notice that either. I hug my knees close, digging my face into my knees. And no matter how much I want the thoughts to stop, the want to make the ovewheming pain to dissapear, I can't.

It's as if my limitations are what effect my yearning most.

I hate how they are so incredibly perfect–flawless maybe?

I hate how they don't know of my existence.

I hate how they are zillions of miles away.

I hate how I ship us together, even though it's impossible for it to actually happen.

I hate how no matter how hard I try, they won't notice me.

I hate how I'm unable to do anything about this urge, this want.

I hate how much they mean to me.

What I hate most is the fact I'll never be able to repel, making it seem like I have no escape.

Is this what you called obsessed? Or is it attraction? Or is it love?

...No it can't possibly be love. It can't. He doesn't even know me. In fact, I don't even know him.

Is he really the cheerful, always smiling and teasing Byun Baekhyun?

Is he really the shy, yet crazy at times Byun Baekhyun?

Is he really the adorable and sweet Byun Baekhyun?

Is he really the cute, yet tough Byun Baekhyun?

...Or is he just a lie?

Is he just wearing a mask that hides his true colors?

I don't know.

That's the problem, I just don't know.

I know quite nothing at all.

It hurts to think the one whom I've been supporting, loving, and caring for can just be a complete lie.

Moreover, what's the point of creating a blog, arguing about who owns who, buying their albums, going to their concerts, writing fanfictions, and obsessing over them when they don't even know of our existence? When they have no clue of how much this pain, this yearn hurts.

Sadly, there's no escape. Once you're in, you can't get out.

But I guess, that's alright. Because we're a fan. A fan that cheers, a fan that supports from afar. A fan that continues to believe they'll succeed and advance. A fan that will forever stay by the ones they love. A fan that will never betray.

Even realizing reality and accepting the fact that we'll never be noticed, realizing the fact that the ones we see everyday on our desktop, on our walls, on our phone, and in our dreams will never take a glance, will never return the feelings, and will never look at us.

Even so, that's  alright.

"So baby don't cry, cry. For my love will protect you..."