“Leave.” His voice’s soft, but he knew the other can hear him perfectly.

 

It’s his birthday today. But he didn’t feel like celebrating it. Not like last year, where he was happily celebrating, drinking after bottles and bottles of beer and soju. Dancing like the diva he was with the other members shaking their head at his antics but was still smiling because they know he is happy. Him snuggling into the crook of his boyfriend’s neck, drunk but still awake to remember all the love that he showered him with. Not today though. Today he felt like sleeping, locking himself in his shared bedroom but he didn’t. So he climbed up to the roof and lay there with closed eyes. With the scorching hot sun shining on him, tanning him but for once he didn’t care because the heat felt good compared to the cold clammy bedroom. 

 

He still didn’t open his eyes, but he knew Taemin was there, right next to him. Standing or sitting now awkwardly trying to talk to him, trying to make him feel better. He appreciated the effort but to be honest, he just wanted to be alone.

 

He sighed when Taemin still didn’t move from his position and he sat up. “Stubborn little brat.” He mumbled softly and he can see the twitch of Taemin’s lips from where he’s sitting.

 

“What’s that?” he asked although he knew what the answer might be. What he didn’t expect is the name that follows as his hands trembled holding the light pink box with great care.

 

“Minho was hiding that from you for quite some time. He was supposed to give it to you today, but……. yeah.” he barely listened to Taemin’s awkward explanation as he gently pulled the glittery bright pink ribbon. He smiled a little at this. Minho always gave him glittery ribbons on every occasion assuming that Kibum like it. He doesn’t really, because the glitters stuck to his hands, face and everywhere making it hard for him to remove them. But he never complained because the proud smile on Minho’s face each time he think he did something great was just too happy and silly and he didn’t have the heart to correct him.

 

Tears were threatening to fall but he holds them in. This is from Minho, and he’s supposed to be happy not crying over some silly memories. So he smiled and lifted up the lid and he laughed. He laughed loudly clutching at the metal key with a lock shaped like a frog. The frog’s mouth was wide, and he inserted the key into it and somehow it fits. He laughed at the present. He laughed at the inside jokes where he always said that he, a key and Minho a frog were a complete different thing and can never be together. And here it is, a beautiful weird pendant with a key stuck in the frog’s mouth but somehow they just look perfect together and he cried. He laughed, he cried, he was a mess. 

 

His body shook tremendously as he tried to hold the tears but he can’t.  He clutched the pendant near to his body, near to his heart as he cried. Big fat salty tears glittering at his cheeks, snorts running down his red nose but he didn’t care.

 

“I miss him.” He stared at the now dark skies, stars scattering around the moon, their dim yellow light giving the earth its soft glow. “I miss him Taemin.” He mumbled again at the crook of his neck, wetting his shirt but Taemin didn’t seem to care as he cradles Kibum into his arms whispering soft little comforts.

 

“I know Hyung. I know.” He muttered softly, stifling a sob. We all do.