006

“How’s your day?” Sehun asks.

Soojung only nods to answer his question.

Both of them sit awkwardly as they continue eating their lunch silently. Sehun doesn’t dare to look up and so does Soojung. None of them intend to start the conversation again as they feel the silence starts suffocating their lungs. Sehun finally looks up to Soojung to catch the glimpse of her. He realizes, strands of long, brunette hair sticking to her cheeks. He realizes that she can’t stop tapping her right fingers while biting her bottom lip nervously. He realizes that she hasn’t started eating yet. He realizes that she only looks at her lunch blankly as her mind drifting away to some thing that Sehun can’t figure out.

He actually knows what exactly in her mind now. But, he lies to himself, acting like he doesn’t know. Because, when he realizes he knows, he can feel his heart is being tossed high to the sky, and shattered into pieces when it meets the ground. He is too afraid to face the pain, so he decides to drink the lies he utters to himself. Just maybe, maybe, it is better that way.

“I am done,” Soojung gets up from her seat while collecting all of her things on the table. She doesn’t know why she finds being with Sehun is unbearably unbearable now. It just feels like she hides something from him yet she doesn’t know what that is.

She actually knows but she lies to herself.

She forces a smile to Sehun, acting like nothing is wrong. He forces a smile back, acting like nothing is wrong.

But, Soojung and Sehun know, something change. He changes. She changes. Their friendship changes.

Their friendship is tainted with painful lie.

006a

“You waste your time, Sehun. I don’t even know why you care about her.”

Sehun looked up to see Kai already took a seat across him. He stared at him for while, but decided to bore his eyes into the Chemistry book on the table. He started scribbling something on his notebook, taking some notes to complete his homework.

Kai, of course, didn’t seem satisfied with Sehun’s “i-don’t-care” reaction. He took the book out of Sehun’s sight, making him to groan a little bit, “Give it to me, Kai.” He threw Sehun with a triumphant smirk while spinning the book on the tip of his fingers, as if it was a basketball.

Sehun got up from his seat and took away the book easily from Kai’s fingertips. He shifted his school slipper toward the aisle of books. Kai followed him from behind, shoving his hands into the pockets. Sehun stopped at the last shelf in the corner of the library and put the book back on the shelf.

He shifted his gaze to Kai who leaned his back against the bookshelf, hands still in the pocket. “What?”

“I demand answer, Oh Sehun.”

Sehun leaned his back against the bookshelf. Following Kai’s action, he shoved his hands into the pockets. He actually didn’t know how to answer Kai’s question. Ever since he caught Soojung trying to end her life in the rooftop, he found himself getting attached to her. He said “hi” to her, he tried to start conversation with her, he tried to step a foot to her life. But, what did he get? He got nothing. Soojung just walked away from him, acting like nothing ever happened between the two of them. He actually didn’t expect more from her, but his heart was still wrenched a little bit everytime she acted like that.

A lot of people already realized how Sehun changed. A lot of people already stayed away from Sehun because he changed. A lot of people already asked him why he changed. But, he didn’t expect this question coming out from his bestfriend’s mouth. Kai usually didn’t care about what Sehun did, how weird that was. Kai would always understand him in the way he was.

Sehun let out a deep sigh, “You just don’t know.”

“What is that thing I don’t know?”

“The thing you don’t know is the thing you shouldn’t know,” Sehun said as he walked away, leaving Kai alone.

Maybe, just maybe. Their friendship wasn’t as understanding as he always thought.

***

Soojung walked into the rooftop and found Sehun who already silently slept there. She walked closer to him until she thought it was close enough for her to examine him. She bent forward to take a closer look of him. His mouth was slightly opened, revealing his front teeth a little bit. She could see his breath floating in the air, disappearing into thin autumn breeze.  Eventhough his eyelids were closed, Soojung could feel the glimpse of sadness beneath them. Living in sadness for long time,  it didn’t take a long time for her to recognize the feeling in other people.

She stood up and walked away from the rooftop.

***

The next day, Sehun saw something inside his shoe locker. He took it out from his locker and chuckled when he actually realized what that was. A box of tissue with a sticky note plastered on the top of it.

You probably will need this more than me.

Both Sehun and Soojung didn’t know their friendship grew in the way they couldn’t even realize.

007

Soojung is on her way walking to the bus stop. It is already late at night but she decides to go home alone rather than waiting for Sehun finishing his work. And, she thinks that it is better to stay away from Sehun for while. She remembers the sad look on his face during the lunch time and it even gives more pangs to her heart. Being nice isn’t her forte yet she doesn’t want to hurt him even more.

Soojung flinches as she could hear the thunder strikes out of the dark sky. And, in the matter of seconds, she can feel water dropping on her head, falling down to her entire body. Damn it, I forget my umbrella. She tries to cover her head with both of her hands, walking a little bit faster. She wants to run as fast as she can but she decides not to. She chooses to have herself soaked in wet rather than tripping over in her high heel.

Suddenly, she feels the rain stop streaming down onto her body. But, when she gazes to the sky, she can see it hasn’t stopped pouring the water yet, flashing another thunder strike. She slowly raises her head, staring at the light blue umbrella, staring at him. It is him, again.

“You’re going to the bus stop, right? Come on,” he slowly leads the way, holding the umbrella tightly as if he doesn’t let a single water droplet drops onto her body again. She slowly nods and follows him while unconsciously gripping on to his elbow. She feels safe.

***

The rain abruptly stops when they step their feet at the bus stop, as if it plays jokes on them. The sky is now plainly blue, showcasing the quiet and silent night. The warm summer breeze starts husing away the dampness of the rain, embracing the two people who stand silently under the umbrella. Jungsoo doesn’t bother to close his umbrella and Soojung  doesn’t even try to tell him that. They just stand there, using the umbrella as the shield to hide themselves from the world.

“I am sorry about my friend today.. During the lunch time,” Soojung feels the word slip out of her tongue. She doesn’t know why she can’t let today’s event pass from her mind. The thought about Sehun suddenly demolishes her heart. Hard.

Jungsoo chuckles at her, “No worry. That’s fine.”

“You can eat lunch with us tomorrow, if you want. I’ll kick him hard under the table if he offends you again,” Soojung says straightly.

Jungsoo’s eyes curve into crescent moon-like shape as he laughs at her, “Seriously, no worry. I don’t feel offended, though.”

Soojung bravely looks at him now. His eye-smile pierces her heart in a good way. She feels like she can live for thousand years only by looking at those eye-smile. “You’re too nice,” Soojung still puts her straight face eventhough her mind can’t think straight anymore at the time.

He smiles at her, “I’m trying.”

They both fall into deep silence.

A bus stops in front of them, breaking the silence between both of them. Jungsoo closes his umbrella and hands it to Soojung, “Take this.”

“I’m—“

“Just take it,” he flashes her with another smile.

“I’m seriously okay.”

“I insist. You can hand it back tomorrow.”

She hesitates but takes the umbrella from his hand, “Thanks.”

She walks into the bus and takes a seat near the window. She can see him waving his hands childishly at Soojung. She chuckles a little bit. She doesn’t realize that she also waves back.

The bus goes, their story moves on.

008

Sehun waits for someone who will fill the seat across him. He waits for her to fill the last puzzle of his heart. He waited and waited until his ramen was as cold as his hands right now.

Soojung, what the heck is wrong with you? What the heck is wrong with us? I hate it when I can’t understand you like this. I—

Sehun stops typing on his phone, staring at it frustratingly. He clicks on the red button and a warning pops out in the screen.

Are you sure you want to permanently delete the selected draft?

Yes. He clicks the green button.

He wishes he knows how to permanently delete Jung Soojung from his life.

This is supposed to be long but...... I know... I keep writing the chapters shorter and shorter lol. But, I hope you can still enjoy reading this as much as I love writing the story. You can throw your comment and tell me what you think about this story so far, I won't bite XD And, thank you for reading <3333