It’s been weeks since the incident with Kris. He’s been a huge help.

He drops by the house almost every day. Checking on how I’m holding up.

I’m still grieving over Kai. It’s only normal. But the grief is not as destructive as it used to. I’m still hurting. But I know, in time I would be healed. I stopped myself from thinking of the ‘what ifs and what would’ve been’ the best I can. I stopped pondering on what Kai might have wanted to tell me in that phone call.

I couldn’t find it in myself to take our pictures off the wall nor put away any of his stuff even if it hurts me to see those things.

It might take years, probably never. I know I am strong enough to hold on to him while trying to get my life back into the right track.

I’m slowly settling back into life. I’m doing the chores, I’m back to teaching my culinary class, and I’m getting in touch with the people who I had worried over me.

I’m spending Friday night lounging on the sofa, drinking red wine, while listening to piano instrumental music.

I knew I reached my limit when I felt my head starting to get buzzed.

I put away the glass of wine and settled to a comfortable position.

I was just about to fall asleep when I heard my phone ring.

I reached for it. Seeing that it was a fellow chef, I decided to take the call.

“I’m sorry for disturbing you, Hyun Ae. But I’m in need of help. I sent you the recipe of a dish we’re gonna prepare on your e-mail. I’m not quite sure if I got the blending of the ingredients right. Please go over it or try cooking it now if you could. I’m really sorry, Hyun Ae. I owe you one.” To keep myself busy, I agreed to join this chef to cater events every now and then. Tomorrow is one of those days.

“No, it’s okay. I’ll see what I can do.”

“Thanks, Hyun Ae! You’re such a doll! Call me later, okay? Have a good night.”

“Ok. Goodnight to you too.”

After hanging up, I slapped my cheeks and stretched.

I headed towards the kitchen for a drink of water, and then proceeded to checking my email.

After downloading the file, I see that my e-mail is filled with unread messages.

Since I have nothing to do anyway, and I’m bound to do it sooner or later, I decided to sort my mails.

I was deleting unread mails I deemed unimportant when I stumbled upon Kai’s name.

My eyes grew wide.

I squinted closer and rubbed my eyes to make sure that my eyes aren’t just playing tricks on me.

It didn’t.

I felt my heart racing by then.

I checked on the date and found it to be the day he died.

I opened it quickly and saw a link.

I hurriedly clicked on it and was redirected to another site. There was a video box and I clicked on it to play.

No way.

I felt the blood drain from my face.

It was Kai.

His tan skin, his plump lips, his eyes… those eyes I would never grow tired of looking at.

It’s really him.

His background seems to be at the airport.

“Hey, Hyun Ae.” He awkwardly smiled.

“I’ve been calling you.. You are not answering your phone. Are you still mad at me?” He chuckled sadly and shook his head.

“Of course you still are.. I’ve been such an haven’t I? I’ve been such an awfully lousy husband who neglected his wife.. My Hyun Ae has been very lonely.” He averted his eyes from the camera.

“I said some things that hurt you. You’re probably thinking how stupid you’ve been for agreeing to marry me. You might even be second guessing my love for you, no?.... I’ve been tormenting myself these past few days for making you think like that.” He bit his lower lip.

“The thing is… I love you... with all of my being. Once I realized that I have fallen in love with you, I knew then and there that you’re the only woman I would ever want to be with. Please know that. I’m trying to love you the best I can.. But maybe I’m not trying hard enough.. I failed to love you the way you should’ve been loved.” His eyes went back to the lens.

“I’ve been focusing on my job, working hard, so I can retire from it soon. I’ve been yearning for change. I just want to have a quiet life now. Work another job where I could be closer to you. I want a regular life with my wife. A life wherein you would get sick of seeing my face to the point you’ll have to force me to leave your sight for a while.”  

He laughed and gently smiled.

“I’m sorry Hyun Ae.. Let’s work on this. Let’s compromise. I’ll be better. I’ll do better because I want it to be Kai and Hyun Ae forever.”

He heaved a huge sigh.

“I love you baby.” He whispered.

“Damn, I miss you! When I get home I’m gonna give you a big hug I’ve been yearning to give you for days now. I hope you’d let me and won’t beat me up into a bloody pulp then. Though I know I deserve it.” He smiled ruefully.

“You probably won’t gonna see this soon anyway. Why am I even doing this? You and your penchant for monthly e-mail checking.” He tutted and shook his head.

“By the time you see this, I’m hoping you’ve long forgiven me already. We would’ve cuddled on your favourite couch, with me reading your favourite book aloud for you by then. We would have been enjoying again the countless playful banters... We would’ve finished rediscovering each other then...” He smiled wistfully at the camera when his head swung sharply to the side and his eyes narrowed.

“Looks like my ride’s here already. Hope this goes well. I’m going home, baby. Saranghae.” He kissed the camera lens and then the video abruptly stopped.

It was when the video ended that I realized that there were tears flowing down my face.

I can’t help it.

He wanted the same thing I did.

He loved me and he wanted to be with me before he passed on.

He was supposed to see me.

He was supposed to come back to me.

We would’ve reconciled then.

We would’ve been holding each other’s hands through this journey called life.

We would’ve loved each other more..

…We would have had a family.

This was a bittersweet moment.

I cried because I missed him so much... maybe I always will.

I cried because there had been hope of a promising future..

And I cried because I felt relieved… felt a thorn come out of my chest…

In a way, I know I’ve been forgiven…

I have been loved until his last moments…

This is one of the greatest gifts I’ve ever received, his farewell gift to me…

That night, I dreamed of Kai.

The first time I did since he passed away.

It was outside.

It was dark but it was day time and mist covered the area.

I saw him riding on the boat, not too far off the lake.

“Kai! Get your annoying self back this instant or I swear I will castrate you!” I called and shouted for him.

He turned to look at me and gave me a huge smile and waved his hands.

“Aigoo! My loving wife misses me!”

“I’m serious Kai! Get back here.”

“But I can’t. The paddles are gone, and I can’t just leave the boat.”

“Kai. Do something or I’ll swim over there.”

I was serious. I’ll go over to him.

I already removed my shoes when he stopped me.

“Don’t Hyun Ae! Aish! You really are crazy! My little angel would freeze!” He then bowed his head low, covered his face with a hand, and rubbed the back of his neck with the other. “I think my blood pressure’s shooting up.”

“Don’t worry I won’t freeze easily!”

I was on the act of taking my shirt off when he spoke again.

“I wasn’t talking about you babe.”

That stopped me.

“What are you on about?”

He tutted.

A/N: And there goes my first threeshots. :)) Hope you loved it. I enjoyed writing it. Let me know what you think.