Story of Song Seung Hyun

"His voice , He can never be like Won Bin."

"His face is weird and ugly."

"You call that rapping!?"

Those words ring in his head again and again...

Pain...

Why did it hurt so much? He thought it was supposed to be happiness to be able to debut. It wasn't supposed to be like this, to hurt so much after putting so much effort...

Outside the bathroom stood a worried Jaejin. His brows knitted together hearing those whimpers and those choked crying sounds. His heart ached and he felt like crying along.

He knew it isn't right. He knew it was forbidden, but he was in love. He was in love with this crying maknae.


Seung Hyun put up a strong front along with his sheepishly smile and stepped out of the bathroom. He did not want Jaejin, who shared a bedroom with him, to worry about himself. He knew his hyung had been taking care of him all these while. Encouraging, teaching and protecting him.

He took a deep breathe and opened the door.

"Hyung! You're not sleeping yet?!" He jumped on the bed acting cheerful but the concern geniune.

Jaejin looked at him, heart aching. How long can he continue acting like he isn't hurting?

"Going too, you?"

"Yup, going to in a moment."

"Y.ou...alright?" Jaejin's gazed locked on him and they locked eyes for who knows how many seconds.

Seunghyun looked away feeling his eyes almost tearing, " I'm alright!" He emphasised on the last word.

"Alright, I will go off the lights then." Jaejin said reach out to switch the lights off. Seunghyun relaxed his breathe a little. He felt like his hyung was seeing through him and he was fighting so hard to not fall into the inviting arms of him and cry a million tears.

Jaejin could sense that Seunghyun was tensing up, looking so vulnerable at that moment. He wanted to badly to hold him in his arms and protect him, smoothing him with a lover's words. However he knew that would only scare him, a man in love with another man? Gay? He smirked to himself bitterly. Who wouldn't freak out? He was even freaked out by himself when he first realised it.

He remembered seeing this gorgeous man when Seunghyun attended his first training day. That day ft island already debut for a year, and he remembered very clearly on that day they were going for band practice, when they were called by the director to introduce them to the newbies.

From then on he could never take his eyes of that beautiful boy.

And hell, god knows how happy he was when they announced the Seunghyun was joining they group. Of course the leaving of Wonbin affected everyone, everyone was hurt and felt betrayed, but he understood his feelings, or at least he tried to understand his feelings. But the overpowing news that Seunghyun was taking his place made Jaejin hold mixed feelings. He was bias, but what could he do, he was in love with this boy.


Today, the air around the room hanged awkwardly. Usually they would have small talks, chats about life and so on, but today the silence was a little too quiet. Seunghyun fidget in the bed not in the mood to start a chat, he felt down today, he didn't feel exactly very good. He felt like there wasn't any energy after all those smiles he forced.

The moment Jaejin lied down on his bed, he let out a soft sigh. This love was making it so hard to him, why couldn't he just see him as a friend and nothing more!?

But even as a friend, a brother he should be encouraging and always be there for him right?! That thought gained him a little courage.

"Seunghyun ah.." Jaejin spoke up after much contemplation.

"hmmmm...?" Seunghyun replied tiredly.

"Jinja...Gwenchana?" Something inside of Seunghyun moved painfully, his eyes suddenly filled with tears. Such a simple question yet such strong emotions.

Hearing no reply Jaejin continued speaking, "You know, you don't need to keep everything to yourself. You can talk to m..to any one of us." Jaejin turned to face Seunghyun,who sleeps on the bed in the other side of the room.

Tears rowed down Seunghyun's cheeks, and some choking his throat making it hard for him to speak.

" ..I...."

"When we first debut there were many bad comments like that, but we had each other. Now you have us!" He suddenly felt the bed sink at one side.

" ..H..yun..g?"

He was suddenly pulled into a warm embrace. So warm and comforting he didn't want to speak and spoil that comfort.

"Pabo,just cry out all you want." Jaejin pushed Seunghyun's head lightly on his chest and gently his hair.

And with that more tears spilled out.

 Silent streaming tears.

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This is my new favourite otp~  I'm working on a angst 2min one-shot also!

Unspokennostalgia©