She walked through the double doors, full of grace and elegance. Her hair was in high bun, with two braids wrapped around with strands gently falling over her face. Her makeup was simple of course; she didn’t want to look over done. A y smoky eye and a little gloss could do the trick. Her dress was long, going all the way down to her manicured toes and trailing behind her a bit but not too much. It clung to her body, showing every bit of her curves. It was an eye catching ruby red, with the back cut out, stopping right above the dip in her spine. It showed quite a bit of cleavage too but luckily the tape was holding up.

Having her pop out during prom was not part of the plan.

All eyes were on her as she seemed to walk in slow motion. It was like something from a cheesy teen movie. The thought of it made her slightly gag, she hated cheesiness but hey, she looked damn good tonight and nothing and no one was going to change her mind about that, not even herself.

~

All eyes were on him as well, although he wore nothing out of the ordinary. A classic black tux with a simple white dress shirt and red tie, that’s all. His face was clean and shaven, of course. And his hair was curled coiffed to the side, nothing too special. That wasn’t his thing. The attention he was receiving, however, was out of the ordinary. He supposed that it was because people have just never seen him dressed up before.

Seeing Lee Jinki being handsome?

Pfftt…no.

Lee Jinki was tofu.

Plain, soft and…there.

Needless to say, Jinki cleans up really well.

~

It was the usual prom protocol.

Lots of hugging, taking pictures and “Ohmygoshes you look so prettyz!” from the ladies and plenty of “You gonna score tonight, bros?” from the fellas. Everyone knows they’re just friends but all night the conversations they would have seemed to go “Ohmygosh are you guys dating!?”, “You guys should totally date!”, “DATE ALREADY YOU GUYS!”

She kind of wanted them to just shut up already. People should know that she has never and never will feel about Jinki in that manner. She wasn’t his type and he wasn’t hers. Just friends, that’s the way they’ve always worked. Dating would just screw everything up.

She glanced at Jinki joking with friends and taking a sip of his coke that he had gotten from the bar.

He looked really nice tonight. The way the low and dreamy glow of the ballroom lights casted a shadow on his face, which made her notice how nice his jawline was.

Jinki catches her gaze and smiles.

She smiles and her cheeks slightly flush. She mouths that she was going to get more coke and he thumbs up to let her know he understood.

She needed to get away from Jinki and his stupid jawline.

It was just these lights, they’re meant to make you see things differently, so you can give in to the whole illusion that this will be one of the best nights of your life.

Although she can’t deny, tonight with Jinki has been fun.

But he’s always been fun.

And maybe these cokes were spiked.

She shakes her head of the silly thoughts of “maybes” and “what if’s” and hurries on to the bar.

~

They hugged their friends some more, snapped a few more photos and waved goodbye. Tonight overall had been a success if you, you know, count out all the awkward “Are you guys dating?” questions but other than that, it was pretty great.

While the other teenage kiddos were off to go drink and grind at an after party somewhere, she and Jinki decided that smoothies sounded damn delicious at that moment and drove to go get some.

~

They picked up some smoothies, hers mango, his guava, and headed out to the edge of town.

Like literally, there was an edge where it kind of just dropped off and you could see an entire vast landscape below and beyond. It was kind of eerie and at the same time magnificent.

A perfect way to end the night and just chill.

They drove pretty fast to get there, making their hair fall apart a bit but who cares? They weren’t trying to impress anybody; they didn’t need to.

It was just them.

They pulled up and Jinki gently stopped the car, leaving just enough space between them and the edge. Jinki took off his jacket, loosened his tie and ed his shirt a bit, letting some air flow through.

He started to look like typical messy Jinki.

Both she and Jinki decided lay on top of his car, sipping their smoothies and looking up into the sky. They didn’t speak for a while, instead just enjoying each other’s presence.

“Can you believe we’ll be in college in a few months?” she asked.

Jinki took another sip of his smoothie. “Well, yeah I guess. I’ve only been planning to go to Harvard my whole life. I’m kind of excited.”

“Oh so you got in?”

“Yep.” He takes another slurp while continuing to stare at the glowing balls in the sky.

She smiled. “Of course you did.” She takes a slurp. “It just seems like time has been moving so fast lately. Like just a few weeks ago we were running in your backyard together.”

“Yeah and taking baths together.”

She giggles. “And then getting messy right afterwards because we would throw our food at each other, making us have to have another bath time.”

A short silence.

Nothing is heard except for the crickets, the faint sound of cars zooming past behind them on a street not too far away and the sound of them slurping more of their smoothies down.

“We’ve seen each a lot.”

She laughs, smoothie almost coming out of her nose. He laughs at the funny sounds she makes.

 “Yeah I suppose so.”

She adjusts herself and takes another sip. “I just want to go back, you know? It seems like everyone is ready to get out there and live adult life but I’m not like everyone else Jinki, I don’t want to grow up yet.”

He chuckles with the straw in his mouth. “Yeah I know. You’re forever a little kid.”

“Shut up.” She playfully punches him and he pretends that it hurt by rubbing his arm.

“So?”

“Hmm?” she replies, once again on the straw.

“Where are you going to college?”

“I don’t know. Probably stay out here in Cali, maybe Washington.”

“Have you applied?”

“Yeah but no reply yet.”

“Oh.”

Another short silence.

Jinki mumbles with the straw in his mouth. “So far away.”

“What?”

“This will be the first time we’ve ever been apart.”

She continued to look into the night and realized that Jinki was right.

Elementary, middle, and high school, they’ve always been together. They even live 2 blocks from each other and their parents have been friends since high school. It’s only natural that they were always together. She and Jinki are practically tied to the hip, inseparable. She stops slurping to think for a moment.

Have Jinki and I ever been apart?

Her head came up empty. She’s never really thought about how much time they spend together.

She takes a small gulp. “Well I mean…you could always come and visit me.”’

“Y-yeah. of course.”

If I ever have the time.

“What do you think you’ll remember most about high school?” she asks abruptly.

He takes a second.

“Honestly?”

“Yes honestly!” she raises her hand ready to smack Jinki on the arm again, with pain this time.

“Okay okay!...Tonight.”

“Really? Why!?”

Sure it was prom but nothing special happened, nothing you could brag about.

“Well I got to go with you.”

She swallows hard, choking on the smoothie.

That thing will be the death of her.

“W-what? Why?!” she says clearing .

“Well for one, I didn’t even plan to get a date. I didn’t even plan to go, let alone with you. That’s why I was so surprised and happy when you asked me.” He continued to the smoothie through the straw, his gaze never tearing from the sky.

Truth is, Jinki was not the first person she thought to ask out to prom. There were about 3 others ahead of him but things didn’t work out.

But she’s glad she ended up going with him anyways.

“Why didn’t you just ask?”

“Look at you! Y-you’re not exactly ugly!”

“Huh?”

“I mean you’re very pretty and guys are usually all over you.” Jinki then scrunches up his face, scolding himself.

“Uh huh…” she chuckles to herself.

Awkward Jinki is awkward.

He’s always has been that way. It’s sort of cute in a weird “my friend is socially awkward, please excuse him” kind of way. It’s like a condition or something.

“I-I mean-“

“Shh, it’s fine Jinki. I get it.” She smiled.

He takes a deep breath and more sips from his Styrofoam cup which was half way empty of its contents now.

She looked at her own cup and tosses it to the side of the car.

“Yah! That’s lit-

“Shut up Jinki.”

She places each of her hands on each side of Jnki shoulders, studying him.

18 years.

18 years she’s known this kid but she’s never really noticed him. Noticed how he’s got a really nice and even build. He’s tall, his shoulder to hip ratio is the perfect and he’s got the right amount of mixture between muscle and softness. Things she normally paid attention to in other males but never thought once to look for on Jinki. And his hair is fluffy, incredibly touchable. She wants to bury herself in it sometimes, get lost in it. In its airy scent and the strange comfort it gives her.

His body, it just radiates warmth.

He’s smart, generous, kind, a little gawky but soft.

Like his smile.

Jinki has one of those smiles. The smile that if you really looked at it, it eventually made you smile. It was contagious like that. It was like magic to put it as plainly as possible. She could be having the crappiest day ever and all Jinki would have to do is show up and smile.

Whenever Jinki smiled, she smiled.

She was happy when he was.

Jinki’s hand waved in her face. “Hey…are you okay?”

“Hmm? Yeah.”

“Good, ‘cause you’ve been staring at me for about 2 minutes straight and it’s freaking me out.”

“Sorry.”

 She rose up, away from Jinki’s personal space and lay back on her forearms.

“What do you think about me?” she asked abruptly once again.

“I think you’re the prettiest and most talented person I know.” He answers straightforward and smiles while taking another sip of his smoothie.

became dry and she suddenly wished that she hadn’t dumped her smoothie out on the ground.

He looks her right in the eyes, sincere and open. His voice is calm, breezing along with the low wind. “I think that you’re the most zealous and confident person I’ve ever met. You’re free spirited.” He smiles and he reflects. “You have a certain zest for life that I don’t see in many people and you put passion into whatever you do, no matter what it is. And when you speak, everyone listens. You just have that kind of voice. You could read the dictionary and I would listen to you.”

She kept her face still, careful to curb any emotion, no matter how touched she was by his words.

“But that’s nothing compared to when you sing.”

A wave of warmth washes over her body, leaving her with sharp pangs and tingles from her cheeks to her toes. Good thing she’s tan or it would be a dead giveaway to how she feels at the moment.

“When you sing it’s…indescribable?”

She still gives him the same stare, her expression stone-like. He worries.

“I don’t know. It’s hard to describe. I know you don’t sing often but when you do, I just want to close my eyes and sink into your voice forever.” He mimics his words by closing his eyes and smiling.

“I know what you’re thinking, “so cheesy!”, and I know you hate it but that’s how I really feel.”

She’s going to burst.

Why is this happening?! Why must god play a cruel joke on her now?!

He’s leaving dammit!

Jinki is leaving in a few months and there’s no telling when they’ll see each other again.

“And you’re unpredictable.” Jinki’s head turns to face her and her heart races.

“Like right now, I can’t read you. What are you thinking?”

“I want to kiss those plump lips.”

He jerks up. “What?”

She takes his face into her hands and crashes their lips together.

It’s not romantic.

It’s not even the slightest bit cute.

He drops his smoothie and It rolls of the car into the dirt next to them. He grabs her shoulders and pulls away, gasping for air. His lips reddened from the harsh contact.

He’s shocked and is staring at her like she’s some sort of monster. She can’t help but stare back in hopes that time will turn back and this mess she’s created will be erased. She can feel the damage she’s done crawling on her like flies on a carcass and she wants nothing more than to leap off the cliff in front of them.

“I-I’m so sorry.” She stammers. 

“Don’t be.”

He scoots closer to her and leans into her, their breaths mixing and she panics.

She panics and squirms and tenses and shuts her eyes tight, anticipating.

And then she feels Jinki’s softness.

His warmth.

His honesty.

And the Earth falls, piece by piece, crumb by crumb, particle by particle; all dissolving into the air until it becomes just them in a world of confusion and awakening, but also a certain inner peace that they didn’t realize they needed until now.

All 18 years put into one kiss.

They finally pull apart, her eyes still closed, his off and around.

“Aw sick.” He laughs.

Her eyes pop open.

“What?”

She glances down at the string of spit connecting the two.

“Ah…that’s gross.”

She wipes her lips as does he. They both giggle and everything was okay.

Awkward.

But in the best way possible.

It was late and they were tired, emotionally exhausted from everything and figured it’d be a good time to start heading home, although they had permission to stay out as late as they wanted.

They drove away, she leaning on his shoulder, him with his arm around her.

They were finally able to acknowledge their feelings for each other but they both knew that it was very likely that it wouldn’t last. They tried to mask their sadness and keep hope but nothing was certain.

The only certainty was summer.