Yesung POV

I stood in front of her desk. I knew there was no way she could see me. I was still hoping for a miracle. I had so many things to say to her, things I should have said before it was too late.

I bent down and placed my elbows on the table so I could study her face better. She looked beautiful as ever. Though she looked like she was doing fine, I knew there were sadness, anger and guilt in her heart. All of those things because of me. It was my entire fault. I wish she would stop feeling guilty because there was no way she could have prevented what had happened.

She turned her head and looked right at me. Well actually, right through me. I placed my hand on her cheek and it. I knew she had felt at least something because she looked like she had seen a ghost. I chuckled at my own thoughts. She actually hadn’t seen a ghost but she was touched by one.

She stood up, and walked towards me and then right through me, literally through me. I know it’s a shock, right? Yes, I am a ghost. I died, and I am now wandering on earth. When I died I got a choice, stay on earth or go to heaven. I decided to stay here. There is a certain risk to staying on earth, though I was not aware off them when I made the choice. When a person dies and stays on earth. He becomes a ghost. Not seen and feared by people. The fear for us is somehow right. Ghost who stay too long on earth are pulled into the darkness. The longer they stay the darker they get. Eventually, the ghost is eaten by the darkness and becomes a dark creature which you would think only lives in hell. Don’t get me wrong, when I made the choice to stay on earth it didn’t mean I was doomed to became a dark creature. When a ghost stays on earth it means he has some unfinished business. When a ghost fulfills his business he gets another chance to go to heaven.

You must be wondering what my unfinished business is because I am staying here. It’s simple: I died in an accident without saying goodbye. My love is filled with sadness, anger and guilt. Sadness because I am not there for her anymore.  I don’t think I can help her with overcoming sadness that she needs to overcome by herself. Guilt because she thinks it’s all her fault. Anger because her father never approved of me. I was just a stupid, poor boy with nothing to offer. She wasn’t exceptionally rich or anything. But her father just didn’t want me to be with his daughter. I want to take her guilt and anger, when I succeed in that I can go to heaven. I can find my peace.

 

Yuri point of view

I was sitting behind my desk. I felt like someone was watching me, then I thought I heard something. I turned my head to place I thought I heard something. There was nothing but air.

 ‘’ I must be going crazy.’’ I though. ‘’ I am starting to hear things.’’

Then a soft warm feeling on my cheek startled me. It felt like someone was my cheek.

* This can’t be.* I thought. * this feeling this hand it feels exactly like …. Yesung.*

‘’ NO! ‘’ I said to myself. ‘’ you are not going to think about him it will only make you said.’’

I stood up. I needed to drink some water.

While walking to the kitchen I saw that it was raining. I couldn’t help but thinking back to the moment I saw Yesung for the first time.

 

>>>>>>> Flashback <<<<<<<<

It was raining. I always hated rainy days, the made me feel so sad and lonely. It gave me the idea that the sky itself was sad and cried. Luckily for me I didn’t get wet because I was standing in a bus shelter. I looked up at the sky; dark grey clouds filled the air. I sighed. This shower was going to take a while. I pulled my knees up and hugged them and rested my head on the glass window of the bus shelter. Then I heard a voice somewhere down the street.

I looked down the street and saw a boy walking. The rain was pouring down on him. He didn’t have an umbrella nor rain clothes on; just his normal clothes which already where drenched. Though the rain was pouring down at him it didn’t seem to bother him. He had his head up and there was a bright smile across his face. He was singing a happy song. How can he be so happy while it is raining? I looked at him amazed. He even did a little dance. The boy was now a few meters away from me. He was still singing; his voice was so beautiful. He was so beautiful. His wet black hair was almost reaching his eyes. His eyes where pitch black but no sadness was seen in them. I felt my heart skip a beat. His bright smile made his chubby cheeks visible. His whole body looked happy. A weird feeling filled my stomach while he slowly walked past me. I watched him walk down the street until he disappeared at the horizon. Who was that boy?

>>>>>>>end of flash back<<<<<<<<<<

 

Since that day the rain had never been the same for me. The boy with the bright smile was my Yesung.  I think that he never saw me that day.

‘’ Can you please stop crying over that stupid boy already!’’ my father Leeteuk called.

‘’ I am not crying!’’ I answered.

‘’ Then why are there tears rolling down your cheeks?’’ Leeteuk asked me.

I touched my cheeks and sure enough my cheeks were wet because of tears from my eyes. I had been crying but I hadn’t noticed it at all. I wiped my tears.

‘’ Thank you.’’ Leeteuk said.

‘’ Dad?’’ I asked. ‘’ Why did you hate him so much?’’

Just as always he didn’t answer me and just walked away. I asked him this question so many times but he never answered me. I drank up my glass of water and went back to my room, where after finishing my homework I went to sleep.

 

Yesung point of view

The darkness of the night came way too fast for my liking. I hate the night because it’s the time the presence of the dark creature can be felt the strongest. At night the darkness is pulls me and every night the pull becomes stronger. I know one day the thread will break, unless I do something about it. I just don’t know how.

I walked back to the place I died; that place strangely feels safe for me.  The place that became my grave is the place I feel safe. Somehow the place I died feels peaceful and there I somehow feel most bound to earth. Though the place feels peaceful it always makes me think of the accident.

Then, a cold shiver went up my spine. I stopped walking. Every time I get a cold shiver, a dark creature was in the neighborhood. I was scared I didn’t want to cross paths with them. They’re horrible.

I started running. I ran so fast that I took a wrong turn and I had no idea where I was. It was a good thing the presence of the dark creature is gone, the dark creature was not close anymore. Then I felt nice and beautiful presence. Where was it coming from? It came from my left. I walked toward the presence. I found the presence. It was a women who had a really beautiful presence. She was a stunning, beautiful, and strong woman. She had very long pink hair and a beautiful slim body. She looked like an angel.

She turned around and a pair of beautiful bright blue eyes looked at me. She actually looked at me, not through me.

 ‘’ Who are you?’’ she asked. ‘’ And what do you want from me.’’

‘’ Why would I need anything from you?’’ I asked.

‘’ Every human wants something from me.’’ she said.

‘’ I am not human.’’ I answered.

It was true. I was a ghost.

‘’ Of course you’re human, sweetie.’’ She said and stood up.

 ‘’ You still have feelings, don’t you?’’ She said.

I nodded.

‘’ See, you’re still human.’’

‘’ But I died.’’ I said.

‘’ Does dying mean you’re not human anymore? You’re still yourself right?’’ she asked me.

‘’ Yes.’’ I said. ‘’ So I am a human ghost, but what are you exactly?’’

She laughed softly.

‘’ I am a goddess.’’ She said.

‘’ A goddess?’’ I asked.

‘’ A goddess, that’s what we call ourselves.’’ She said. ‘’ Everyone that is born in heaven we call a goddess.’’

‘’ You’re from heaven?’’ I asked.

‘’ Yes.’’ She said. ‘’ And I’m guessing since you came to me you want to go there too?’’

‘’ Of course.’’ I answered.

‘’ But you can’t.’’ she said.

‘’ Exactly.’’ I said.

‘’ What did you do that you couldn’t go?’’ she asked me.

‘’ I didn’t do anything! I chose to be here.’’ I told her.

‘’ Oh, you’re one of those, that is easy.’’ She said ‘’ What do you want? Revenge? Love?’’       

‘’ I want to talk to my love one last time to tell her I’m okay.’’ I said. ‘’ But she can’t even see me.’’

‘’ That is all?’’ she asked.

‘’ I think so.’’ I answered.

‘’Okay then go talk to her and go to heaven.’’ She said.

‘’ But how do I talk to her?’’

‘’ Easy. Just get her to go to the place you died and all the people who know that you, especially you. I mean people who know your name and when and how you died. They can see you and talk to you. But only at that place.’’

‘’ So she just needs to go to the place I died?’’

‘’ Yes.’’ She said. ‘’ That is what you wanted from me. Isn’t it?

I nodded. After that she disappeared.

The place I died huh, that brings back memories.

 

 

Yuri pov

I sat down on the bench on the bridge; it was the place Yesung and I usually met up. I was disappointed because he wasn’t there. I looked at the water that flowed under the bridge. The sun was already going down, and left a red color at the horizon. It wouldn’t take long before it was dark. I kept staring at the sundown and didn’t notice someone sat down next to me.

‘’ Here.’’

I looked up. Yesung was sitting next to me and was holding out a coke. He smiled at me; my heart fluttered just by seeing his bright smile.

‘’ Thanks.’’ I said and took the coke.

‘’ So what brings you here, Yuri?’’ he asked me.

‘’ Boredom.’’ I said.

‘’ Really?’’ he questioned. ‘’ Knowing you, you wouldn’t come here just because you were bored. ‘’

Why does he know me so well! I can’t tell him that I wanted to come here because he is here. And that I like him, a lot! And wanted to see him.

‘’ You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want.’’ He said.

I kept quiet. Then I spoke up because I hated those awkward silences.

‘’ Hey, can I ask you something? ‘’

‘’ Of course.’’ he said. ‘’ You can ask me anything you want.’’

I opened my coke and took a sip. Then I asked:

‘’ Do you know what love feels like?’’

He looked at me. He must think I am a weirdo asking such random question. The moment I wanted to say that he should forget that I asked that he spoke up.

‘’ I do.’’

‘’ You do?’’ I asked surprised.

‘’ Yes.’’ He said.

‘’ Then what does it feel like?’’ I asked him.

Lately I felt so strange being with him, somewhere I get the idea that I am starting to love him.

‘’ It feels like I am floating on a little cloud high up in the sky every time I see her.’’ He said. ‘’Her smile can light up my darkest days, I have only known her for a year but it feels like she has been with me my whole life.”

‘’ You seem to know that feeling very well.’’ I said.

‘’ Do I?’’ he asked.

‘’ Do you still love that person?’’ I asked.

‘’ Yes, I do.’’ He told me. ‘’ I love her with whole my heart.’’

I felt embarrassed for loving him. He already had someone he loves in his life. There is no way I am going to break his love, his happiness. But I still wanted to know.

‘’ What do you like about her?’’

‘’ She is nice, smart, beautiful and everything.’’ He said.

‘’ She sound perfect. ‘’ I said.

‘’ She is perfect.’’ He answered.

That was it. There was no hope for me anymore. My heart felt like it was shattered to pieces.

‘’ but.’’ he began. ‘’ I don’t know if she will accept my love.’’

I looked up at him. So he didn’t have a girlfriend yet?

‘’ Yuri.’’ He said. ‘’ Will you except my love?’’

‘’ What?!’’

He meant me! He was talking about me! My heart pounded in my chest. My head got all fuzzy like I was on the little cloud in the sky. I was in love with him.

‘’ Will you except my love?’’

I smiled. I was at a loss for words, but the smile was enough for him, because he smiled back at me with the brightest smile I’d ever seen across his face. I saw him coming closer to me. He a hair out of my face. My heart skipped a few beats. I knew for sure he could hear it from where he was. He was still coming closer to me. What was he going to do? Was he going to kiss me? Wait. I didn’t know how to kiss. What do I do? What do I do? His face was centimeters away from my face. God he was beautiful.

‘’ Can I kiss you?” He asked me.

I didn’t know what to do. My head nodded and made the decision for me. What did I do! I didn’t know what to do!? Why did I nod?! He was coming closer again, just a centimeter away. He closed his eyes, I followed his example.

* This is it.* I thought. * My first kiss.*

Before I could freak out more, his lips touched mine.

My heart stopped that instant. The cloud I had been floating on was now in space; there was no gravity anymore. His kiss was like a little piece of heaven, and I hoped I would never leave his heaven.

I woke up from my dream; no it was not a dream more like a flashback. I dreamt about the day Yesung first kissed me. Why did I dream that? I haven’t thought about that for a long time because every time I think about it also makes me think about his death. These two events happened in the same place.

 

---

 

I just came back home from school that day. When I entered my house I found a note Leeteuk.

I’ll be back in two hours.

See you then.

Leeteuk

So my dad had gone somewhere. My mom died when I was very young so it had always been me and Leeteuk. We had a very good bond, but that changed when I brought Yesung home with me. Which was also the same day as he died? I still think the whole thing was my fault I brought him with me in the first place I just hadn’t done that.

 

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Flashback <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

‘’ Dad!’’ I called ‘’ I’m home!’’

‘’Come in.’’ I said to Yesung who was standing behind me.

‘’ Can I go to the toilet somewhere?’’ he asked me

‘’Of course’’ I said. ‘’ It’s over there.’’

I pointed to a door on his left.

‘’ Thanks’’ he said.

‘’ I’ll be in the living room which is behind that door.’’ I told him and pointed to a door right in front of him.

He nodded and went to the toilet.  When I came into the living room Leeteuk came just from the kitchen.

‘’ You’re back early today.’’ He said and hugged me. ‘’ Welcome home.’’

‘’ Thanks’’ I said.

‘’ May I ask why you’re home early today?’’

Then the door to the hall opened and Yesung came in. Leeteuk looked at him in surprise.

‘’ And who might this be?’’ Leeteuk asked.

‘’ He is my…’’ Can I tell him he is my boyfriend, won’t he freak out? I told him that I met some boy but never that I was dating him.

‘’ She is my girlfriend’’ Yesung said proudly.

At least I don’t have to tell him I thought.

‘’ What!’’ Leeteuk almost yelled. ‘’ Is that true Yuri?’’

I nodded. I guess he is not that happy.

‘’ I had no idea you liked someone.’’ Leeteuk said.

‘’ Well,’’ I said, ‘’ I did talk a lot about him.’’

‘’ When did you talk about him?’’ Leeteuk asked angrily.

‘’ He is the boy I met on the street.’’ I told him.

‘’ That beggar is your boyfriend!’’ he yelled at me.

‘’ Don’t call him a beggar!’’ I yelled back at him.

‘’ Are you talking back to me!?’’ he asked furious.

I looked at Yesung and he looked so lost. He didn’t what to do, neither did I. My father had never been so angry before.  I felt so sorry for him. I never should have brought him with me.

‘’ How long have you known him?’’ Leeteuk asked in a strict tone.

‘’ A year.’’ I answered.

Leeteuk’s eye’s widened.

‘’ What!’’ he yelled ‘’ So long!’’

‘’ Yes.’’ I said. ‘’ But it has been just friendship for a very long time and at some point it just changed.’’

‘’ That doesn’t change the fact you’ve been with him for a whole year.’’ He said.

‘’ Dad!’’ I said. ‘’ You’re wrong it’s not like that!’’

He completely ignored me, and he focused on Yesung now.

‘’ So you are my daughter’s boyfriend?’’ Leeteuk said to him, and it didn’t sound friendly at all.

‘’ Yes.’’ Yesung said calmly. ‘’ My name is Yesung.’’

How can he be so calm, while Leeteuk just yelled at me and him and even called him a beggar?

‘’ Dad!’’ I yelled at him. I wanted to make him stop. I was afraid he was going to hurt Yesung.

‘’ I don’t want you in my house.’’ He said to Yesung

‘’ Dad.’’ I tried again. ‘’ Can you please listen to me?’’

‘’No.’’ he said.

‘’ Then,’’ Yesung tried, ‘’ can you please listen to me?’’

Leeteuk looked at him like he could kill him on the spot but kept quiet, so Yesung started talking.

‘’’I think it’s not up to you to say who your daughter sees and doesn’t see. I think it’s a decision only she can make.’’

That was it Leeteuk snapped.

‘’ You filthy beggar, how dare you speak back to me!’’ Now he was really really mad.

‘’ Dad, don’t…..’’

‘’ GET OUT!!!!’’ my father yelled at Yesung.

Yesung just stood there not knowing what to do.

‘’ I SAID GET OUT!!!!’’ Leeteuk yelled again and pointed to the door.

I stood in front of Leeteuk.

‘’ Dad stop this.’’ I said. ‘’ Leave him alone.’’

For a moment I though he was going to hit me. He was so furious when he looked he at me, but he didn’t hit me, instead he violently pushed me away and Yesung was still there.

‘’ GET OUT AND NEVER COME BACK!’’ Leeteuk yelled at him once again.

Yesung looked at me with a sad face but this time he obediently opened the door to the hall and left.

‘’ IF I EVER SEE YOU AROUND MY DAUGHTER AGAIN YOU SHALL PAY!!!!’’ Leeteuk yelled after him.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>end of flashback <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

 

Leeteuk got what he wanted after Yesung left. He went to our place on the bridge but he hadn’t paid enough attention while crossing the road and he got hit by a car. Leeteuk never saw us together again. I heard from the doctors it happened so fast; he was dead the instant the car hit him, which meant that he never had to suffer.

 

Yesung POV

So I needed her to go to the place I died. How do I get her to that place? I can’t just ask her to go there. Maybe I can write something? But the last time I tried to write I couldn’t even hold a pen because it just fell from my hand. I guess I can give it another try. I went to Yuri’s room. She was sleeping so peacefully. Her worries, guilt and sadness had been whipped away from her sleeping face. It was just all happiness and peace. I wondered what she was dreaming about. 

I walked to her desk, and tried to pick up the pen lying there but it just slipped through my hand. I focused so much, I managed to pick it up for three seconds but after that it just fell again. The whole night I practiced and when the sun was up again, I managed to pick up the pen and I started writing on some paper that was lying on her desk. But before I had a second letter on the paper the pen fell again. Then the alarm on her desk ran and she woke up. I needed to hurry before she was gone, but the nerves of the rush made it harder to pick up the pen. I finally managed to write something down.

You a_______________

Yuri grabbed the paper and put it in her bag, the sentence I wrote ended in a long line. The pen felt from my hands again. I failed. She looked back to the desk, but turned around and left the room. I tried everything I could, but I was too late.  I was always too late.

Even the day I died, I was running without looking where I was going. When I stopped and looked where I was, I was on the bridge. Our place. The place where she accepted my love. Then it hit me. I didn’t want to be apart from her. Her father had nothing to say about that. Running away like I had done wasn’t the solution. I should have stayed. Running away only made the situation worse. I wanted to fight for, and I wasn’t planning on letting her go. I turned around and started running back, back to her. I didn’t pay attention to my surroundings. Suddenly I heard a car horn, and the sound of a car trying to stop. I looked up and saw a van coming right at me. There was no way I could have avoided him. I was going to get hit; I was going to die. A tear fell from my eye. Then the car hit me. I felt my legs crumble under me and I fell to the ground. My head hit the ground hard and felt the crack reaching my brain. I had been run over by a van. I think I died the instant the van hit me because I never felt any pain. Though I felt the unpleasant feeling of bone cracking but no pain at all.

I sighed. I never should have left her home that day. Look where it brought me. A ghost trying to get to his love. A tear fell from my eyes. Can a ghost cry? I guess so, because I am crying. Why am I crying? Because I failed to write her? Because I died? I’ve never cried over my own death. I wiped my eyes, but the tears just kept falling down. I didn’t know what to do now. How am I going to get to her? She is in school. Maybe I can do something there?

 

Yuri pov

I woke up from the sound of the alarm. I looked at the clock.

‘’ Noooooo’’ I set the alarm way too late!

I was supposed to be up an hour earlier. School is going to start in 20 min. I went out of bed as fast as I could, quickly changed into other clothes, and grabbed the things I needed. The last thing was a paper from my desk I need for my first class. I walked to the door, but I heard something falling. So I turned around but there was nothing. So I left my room.

At school my friend and I where friendly chatting when the teacher came in. The teacher made us silent and started his lecture. The lecture had been going on for just about five minutes when something strange happened. A little chalk started floating in the air. It started writing on the board. The teacher looks at it and squealed from surprise, but was too scared to do anything. It was like a ghost was writing on the board. Slowly words where forming.

Yuri accepted my love,

Above the water.

Will you accept it again?

I was shocked by the words. I knew who wrote them. I felt something on my cheek, the same as yesterday. Now I was sure it was Yesung who was here. I stood up. I felt the eyes of the whole class burning in me, but I just walked to the door.

‘’ Where are you planning to go miss?’’

‘’ Euhm.. I am going to...’’

‘’ Sit.’’ the teacher interrupted me.

‘’ But…’’

‘’ Sit!’’ he said strictly. ‘’ I am going to continue my lecture.’’

I started to walk back to my seat. The teacher turned around to erased Yesung’s words. I took these seconds to run out the door, but behind the door I ran into the principal.

‘’ Sorry’’ I said and slowly walked further I didn’t want to raise any suspicion.

‘’ Yuri!’’ the teacher called from his classroom. ‘’ Come back immediately, you can’t just run out of class.’’

I didn’t want to go back but the principal grabbed me by my wrist and dragged me back to the classroom. I had no other choice then to sit out this lecture. I could only hope that Yesung would wait for me.

 

Yesung pov

I waited on the bridge for Yuri, it is the place I died. It reminded me of what happened that. At first I had no idea that I was dead, I had no idea what was going on.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> Flashback<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

I felt no pain for the whole bone cracking incident. I thought that was strange I thought breaking bones would hurt more. Then some voice spoke to me. He asked me if I wanted to stay on earth or if I wanted to go to heaven. I chose to stay on earth. The voice’s last words were:

‘’ Fulfill your wish, we’ll be waiting for you in heaven.’’

Then suddenly I was standing on the other side of the road. I didn’t look back but I just ran  to Yuri. When I reached her house I tried to push the bell, but my finger just went through it. I tried so many times but nothing worked.

* Maybe.* I thought. I touched the door carefully, and my hand went through it. That is weird I thought. This should not be possible. I realized my whole body could go through the door.  How did I do that? That should not be possible. The moment I went to the door a rage of shouting, crying and screaming could be heard. The crying was Yuri. I knew it was Yuri because I recognized her voice. I followed the sound and ended up in the living room. Yuri’s father was standing.  Yuri was cuddled up in a corner. I sat down next to her. I wanted to put a comforting arm around her but I quickly noticed that also wasn’t able to touch Yuri, my hand just went through her.

‘’ What the hell is wrong with me!’’ I yelled but there was no response at all.

‘’ It’s not true’’ Yuri whispered.

‘’ It’s not true.’’ She whispered again but this time her voice was high pitched.

I didn’t get what she was talking about. What was not true? She was sobbing. Then she yelled.

‘’ You did it!’’ she attacked Leeteuk on the other side of the room.

‘’ You made him leave!’’ she screamed and pounded on her Leeteuk’s chest. What happened to her to be this freaked out? She isn’t a person you can make angry easily.

‘’ I hate you!’’ she screamed.

Leeteuk put his arms around her to stop her from pounding on his chest. She was struggling against him but had no chance of winning but still her rage went on.

‘’ Say it!’’ she screamed ‘’ Say you hate him!’’

 * him?* I thought.

This I about a guy and Leeteuk hate him. Is this about me? Am I the cause of her rage a crying?

‘’ Say it!’’ Yuri screamed again.

‘’ You made him leave.’’ Yuri sobbed.

Leeteuk tried to calm her, but it didn’t help.

‘’ You know it’s not all my fault.’’ Leeteuk said calmly.’

‘’ Liar.’’ she sobbed.

Leeteuk tried to comfort her again.

‘’ Liar!’’ Yuri screamed it this time.

It hurt me seeing her like this. I’ve never seen her like this. I’ve seen her sad and angry but never like this.

‘’ Liar! ’She screamed again this time at the top of her lungs.

That was the loudest scream I’d ever heard from her. After that she just started crying. I was standing not able to do anything. She was screaming and crying because of me. But why? I was standing right next to her. I was fine. I put my arms around her once again and said comforting words to her but she didn’t react. Neither did she show any signs of being able to hear my voice.

What was going on?

‘’ Yuri?’’ I asked for her but she didn’t respond.

Why?  Why was it like she couldn’t see nor hear me? I didn’t understand.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> End of flashback <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

 

I was so confused back then. I later found out that she just had received a phone call and they told her I died in a car accident. That was why she was like that.

And now I know that I am a ghost that is why she didn’t respond to me. Somewhere I wished I chose heaven and didn’t have to live this life filled with dark creatures. But I know that if I chose that I would die of guilt for not being there with her. I needed to do something for her. I chose correctly and now that I know how to talk to her. I just needed to wait for her.

 

Yuri pov

Class was finally finished. Time to get away from here! I left the school and went to the bridge. It was still early in the morning so there weren’t a lot of people on the bridge. I saw the bench on which I always sat with Yesung. I let my hand slide over it before sitting down on it. This is the first time for me to come back here after he died. This place brings back way too many memories.

‘’ Long time no see.’’ a voice said next to me.

I immediately recognize that voice it was Yesung. I looked to my right and yes Yesung was sitting there he was holding out a coke.

‘’ Here.’’ He said.

‘’ Yesung?’’ I asked completely ignoring the coke.

‘’ Yes, it’s me’’ he said.

Tears of joy filled my eyes.

‘’ No, it can’t be.’’ I sobbed.

‘’ That is not you.’’ I was crying now.

‘’ That’s not you.’’ I sobbed in a high pitched voice.

 Yesung smiled.

‘’ It really is me.’’ he said.

I tried to hug him but I fell right through him on the bench. This can’t be possible. I can’t fall through him! I pulled myself together and sat up. He was still smiling at me, but his eyes told me otherwise; his eyes told me he was sad.

‘’ What happened to you?’’ I asked still sobbing ‘’ You were dead.’’

‘’ I know’.’ he said ‘’ I am still dead.’’

‘’ But how is it possible that I can see you?’’ I asked.

‘’ That is because you are at the place I died.’’ He explained.

‘’ So I can always come here and see you?’’

‘’ No.’’ he said. ‘’ I’m sorry but I need to go to heaven.’’

‘’ You should.’’ I said. ‘’ Can you explain me why you aren’t there now?’’’

‘’ I couldn’t leave you behind.’’ He said.

That is so sweet I thought.

‘’ Yuri.’’ He said. ‘’ I want you to know that my death was not your fault nor was it leeteuk’s fault. I don’t want you to feel guilty over some accident that was no one’s fault. If there is anyone who made everything worse it was me. My death made it worse. I made the worst mistake. No one could have prevented this event, even me, but it just happened. And everyone has some role in the accident the driver, you, your dad, me. It’s no one’s fault okay.’’

I nodded.

‘’ Thank you for telling me that.’’ I said.

‘’ My death was an accident and an accident alone. It was no one’s fault, so please don’t blame yourself. And if you do blame yourself I am going to haunt you.’’

I chuckled. That would be really scary.

‘’ Can I ask you something?’’ I asked.

‘’ Of course.” he said.

‘’ Did you feel any pain when you died?’’

‘’ No.’’ he said.’’ Nothing at all.’’

‘’ Yuri? Can you do three things for me?’’

‘’ Depends.’’ I said.

‘’ I will tell you the three things. ‘’

‘’First Don’t follow me, at least not on purpose. ‘’

‘’Second Live your life. Don’t give in to the darkness.’’

‘’ and last Always keep on smiling.’’

‘’Okay?’’

 ‘’ Okay.’’ I said.

Yesung stood up her was looking at something.

‘’ It’s beautiful.’’ He said.

‘’ What is?’’ I asked.

He looked at me.

‘’ You’ll know when the time is just right.’’ He said.

He stood in front of me, then bent down and hugged me. This time I could feel him. I felt his arms on my back. Just like it used to be.

‘’ Yuri, thank you for being born. Thank you for loving me and thank you for being there when I needed you.’’ 

Tears where streaming down my cheeks. His words touched my heart. I would never be able to forget him. I knew these words were his goodbye.

He looked at me and his eyes were also filled with tears. His eyes which were so sad a moment ago where now filled with hope. They were sparkling brightly.

I smiled. Then he kissed me. I would never forget him, never. He looked at me for the last time then walked away. He started to disappear. He looked back ones more and said:

‘’ I love you remember that.’’

‘’ I love you more.’’ I said

‘’ I love you the most.’’ He said and then he disappeared.

‘’ Goodbye.’’ I whispered.

 

Leeteuk pov

‘’ I love you remember that.’’ Yesung said

‘’ I love you more.’’ Yuri said.

‘’ I love you the most.’’ Yesung said and then he disappeared.

‘’ Goodbye.’’ Yuri whispered.

Tears were also falling down my cheeks. I heard their whole confrontation. How could I have been so mean to Yesung? He is the nicest guy I’d ever seen. Yesung told her all the things I should have told her, but instead I told her to forget him and never think about him again. I think that I was not ready to let her go. I was not ready to let her love another guy. She always had only me. She always had loved me and only me. I think I was afraid that if she would be with Yesung she would forget me. I loved her so much; she must have hated me so much. What am I, an idiot? I should have let them be together; I should not have yelled at Yesung to go away. I think I need to apologize to Yuri, if she is willing to accept it.

I stood up from my little hiding place and walked to Yuri who was still sitting on the ground was looking at the place aron had disappeared.

‘’ Yuri.’’ I said ‘’ It’s my entire fault. I am so sorry I should have never sent him away. I- I was just afraid of losing you to him. I loved you so much. You probably hate me now, don’t you?’’

Yuri looked up at stared at me. Then, she stood up and hugged me.

‘’ Dad, I hated you for what you did, but you heard him. It was not your fault and I think Yesung is right and I think you are right. I should not have brought him home without telling you about him. You should not have sent him off. He should have paid more attention when crossing the road. The driver should have paid more attention on the road. We all have done something wrong so it’s just an accident. It’s not your fault. The only thing you did wrong was love me too much, and I turned that into hate. I’m sorry dad. I love you.’’

‘’ I love you too my daughter.’’

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