The ride to my parent’s restaurant felt extremely tedious, and though the high way route only took less than thirty minutes, I couldn’t help but groan at every red light met in the small community roads. Even if I arrived at work earlier today, it didn’t necessarily mean that I would see Tao again any sooner. Just the thought of it made my stomach ache with anxiousness, and I wanted to just sit still and calm down. Being locked in a moving vehicle didn’t help so much.

            I pulled the heavy glass door open for my father to move boxes of produce from the car inside. Even though my mind knew that they weren’t here yet, my eyes still wandered around the parking lot just in case. I did the usual morning preparations of setting the tables and filling pitchers of ice water. I figured today I’d be too occupied for anything else so I left all my electronics except for my phone at home. My mom arrived a few minutes later with another trunk full of fresh groceries, mostly seafood for my dad to prepare. She only ever bought such things when special guests were expected. Every few minutes I’d check the time and then sigh quietly to myself. Why did the hour hand move so slow?

            There were only two tables of customers here, a large crowd had already left five minutes ago and I was left cleaning the long table for eight. Sloppy eaters existed in every party crowd, so I wasn’t surprised by the piles of rice scattered on the table tops and soy sauce spills dripping off the edge of the cloth. Like any typical day, I cleaned with the same excitement that amounted one’s amusement when watching paint dry. As I wiped the last table, I looked up at the doorway to see a girl jumping up and down in front of the door, her back turned toward me. I didn’t have to see her face to know who she was. The girl bounced up and down as if she had to use the washroom, rushing the rest to hurry out of their car. She eventually gave up, having not even waited ten seconds before pulling the door open, her bright smile marking her own entrance as grand. 

            “Hello, welcome to--” My mom rushed out of the kitchen area to greet our new customer, but was interrupted when they met eye to eye.

            “Jia? My goodness you’ve gotten a lot prettier!” She gushed, going straight for a hug. She was always excessively intimate with little children, and I often wondered if they got creeped out. Though Jia hadn’t seen my mom in years either, she seemed to recognize her easily. My mom hadn’t changed her hair style since the day I was born, so other than a few new wrinkles and some extra weight around the belly she looked exactly the same.

            Their mom was next to come in holding a gift bag filled with tissue paper at the top. She immediately went to greet my mom after giving me a small wave and then handed her the present. Because my mom was occupying them, I felt guiltless for wondering only about Lu Han and Tao--but mostly Tao. There was a definite bias going on, but I still wouldn’t admit to it.

            Tao came in next, dressed in different clothes than he was in this morning. Lu Han was right behind him, and though he still looked relatively pale, he seemed a lot livelier now. His hands were also no longer clutching his stomach, so the doctors probably gave him something to numb the pain.

            “So we meet again,” Tao chuckled, watching me as I followed him to the table we had set up prior to their arrival. There was nothing that set theirs apart from others except for the colored napkins as opposed to the generic plain ones.

            “How’s your brother doing now?” I asked, feeling genuine worry for him. Though I had never considered myself close to Lu Han, we did grow up together so in ways he was like a little brother. Kris sure treated him like one back in the day anyway. Tao glanced over to his little brother who sat quietly by himself at the end of the table, sipping at his cup of ice water.

            “He had his medicine a few minutes ago so he’s pretty hungry now, but he’s feeling a lot better.” Tao nodded, still somewhat looking in his brother’s direction. Lu Han kept his eyes lowered, uninterested in engaging in conversation with anyone. He was probably in some profound and deep mode of thinking. That, or he was struggling with hunger.

            “You guys can start with something at the buffet first. I’ll go tell my dad you’re here.” I pointed over to the buffet table, and then directed them to the shelf of plates. As they were grabbing food, my mom wouldn’t stop pestering Lu Han about how much taller he’d gotten. When we used to play as kids together, Lu Han had the reputation of being the shortest among us. Now he was even taller than me. I never thought that the tables would turn, but puberty did these kinds of life twists to people who hadn’t met in practically forever.

            We were all seated at the long table, various comments were thrown back and forth creating a pool of random conversations amongst us. My mom liked to talk so much she managed to occupy both their mom and Jia. LU Han ate quietly by himself, looking up at us only when his name was mentioned, but then dismissing it as senseless gossip.

            “How’s the food?” I asked, breaking the silence between the intervals of Tao’s chewing. If I remembered correctly, Tao was one to always talk while he was eating anyway. It didn’t seem like such a habit could be shed over the span of six years, and besides, that was what teenagers did.

            “It’s really good. Tell your dad I said that.” He smiled, his mouth half full of noodles. I hadn’t eaten either. My mom left for the kitchen and there was a strange silence that suddenly filled the room. First, I noticed Tao’s mom staring at me, and then Jia, and eventually Tao as well. I had the urge to look in the mirror or wipe my face suddenly.

            “Your mom must be really proud of you.” Tao’s mom grinned happily, watching me with endearing eyes that had always invoked the feeling of safety within me.

            “Why do you say that?” I asked curiously. They didn’t know much about the me now, and I was sure that I wasn’t the same person as I was six years ago.

            “You’ve grown up to be so beautiful and smart, unlike this idiot son I have here.” She joked with non-regretting smiles, shooting a playful glare in Tao’s direction. He rolled his eyes and then stuck his tongue out childishly at her. Tao had always struggled with academics since he was young, but I knew Asian parents liked to exaggerate their children’s successes and failures. Tao probably wasn’t the idiot she thought he was, and I believed that.

            “I think there’s a lot to be proud of Tao for too.” I vouched for him, and she just laughed to herself.

            “Like what, Erika? He’s not even good looking.” Jia sighed, shaking her head in disappointment as she eyed Tao from head to toe--or as close as she could with the table obstructing her. I didn’t know what to say in response to her remark, and it would be too awkward to refute her statement so I just laughed along with their mother.

            “Are you dating anyone?” Tao’s mom asked. I could feel this question slowly making it’s way out, and someone finally mustered the courage to ask it. The notorious dating question was popular between our parents since the first grade. It started out as a simple joke, but now that we were ‘old enough’ it seemed a lot more serious. Everyone seemed to be anticipating my answer, so much that even Lu Han was watching me now. Embarrassed by all the eyes on me, I quickly shook my head and laughed nervously,

            “No, I’ve never dated.” It was the absolute truth, and after seeing Tao’s reaction expression, I wasn’t sure whether to be happy about this truth or not. Everyone’s eyes seemed to have grown two times bigger in the matter of seconds, and some jaws even dropped.

            “You can tell me, Erika. I won’t tell your mother.” She insisted, and I could believe that it was a promise she’d keep.

            “That was the truth... I’ve never dated anyone...” I reiterated in a slower pace to make myself clear. Eventually the sincerity of my reply was bound to get through to them. The four of them mulled over my answer for quite some time and I couldn’t stand how awkward it was getting so I diverted the subject onto Tao, but also because I really was curious.

            “Tao’s probably dated someone before, right?” I laughed wishing my question had been taken as rhetorical. I’d already known the answer for quite some time now...

☁☼☁

            When we were younger, our two families always had bi-annual trips to a public water park not too far from our neighborhoods. As we grew older, ascending up the grade levels in school, our house visits became less frequent. Though our lives got busier we always made time for these water events, and they were times I’d spend an entire year looking forward to. We’d gone there so much together I’d forget most of the days we’d spend there, but there were a few that stayed in my heart, even when no photographs existed to document those particular moments. As if on demand, my mind would paint a canvas, filling with the scenery of brick walls of the information building, the uneven cement flooring covered in old gum and bird feathers, and the shallow pools of water in the distance.

            It was about 2:00pm when Tao and I decided to go on a walk around the pool areas. We’d always go on these walks, and thinking back to them would be extremely nostalgic; from a third perspective, almost romantic. It would be just the two of us. Back then, Jia was too little to go to the pools unsupervised, and we were still too young to properly know how to look after her so she usually just stayed with the adults who watched over our stuff and gossiped about things we were too immature to care about. Kris and Lu Han would always break off from the crowd first, leaving Tao and I behind so it was no wonder we’d always be together. It was too convenient that things just happened this way. I remember as we walked, we talked about trivial things that kids did--things like Pokemon games and what cartoons we followed up on. Even though he laughed at my lame excuses for jokes, something seemed on his mind, distracting him from fully engaging in our kiddy discussions. Though I could tell he was bothered, he constantly forced on a smile, as if he was hiding something. Even now I’d wonder if what he was hiding was really... Guilt.

            When we got to the old, wooden bridge over the small stream that connected to one of the pool areas, he stopped and then looked at me. My mind went blank and I didn’t remember even what I had planned in my ind to say. I just stared back at him, and our eyes fell like that for what seemed like an eternity.

            “Is something wrong...?” I finally asked, scared to hear the answer. I sensed that bad news was going to come sooner or later; I just hoped that when it came I’d be ready to hear it. Was he finally ready to let me in on his distracted thoughts?

            “Actually... yeah....” He mumbled at first, but then cleared his throat to speak, “I’m dating someone right now.” His voice shook subtly but nervously. I knew him well enough to know this was something he didn’t want to voice out. So why did he force himself to? his last sentence hit me like a boulder in the face. I was expecting something bad, just not that. Anything but that. We were only in the fifth grade. Besides wondering if we were even ready to be immersed in the complicated world of relationships, for those seconds he stared at me afterwards I asked myself; why not me?

A/N: Hello readers! sorry for not updating in... almost a month? Maybe? I don't know I lost track. I actually just moved into dorms a few days ago and finally adjusted (kind of) so I wanted to update. I actually also lacked inspiration... This chapter looked a lot longer on my macbook... so I thought this was gonna be a long update but I guess it's just a normal length one. I'll try to update again soon, but I'll have to put Wanderlust on a hiatus until maybe winter break. I left my Wanderlust planning back at home so I don't want to BS the ideas I had for that plot. Countdown to Sunset however, is 95% my past so the entire plot is embedded in my memory ^^ School starts after tomorrow so we'll see how busy I am. Wish me luck in first year University ^^