Where should I start?

With myself. Yeah?

So here’s my dating history: I’ve dated two men when I was in America. In Korea, I have dated... Let me clear this first: I’m not a play girl. I just really have a tendency to be closer to men, since I’ve always wanted an older brother. Another thing: I fall so easily in love. It’s my weakness. So who did I date? Guess.

Key? No.

Jinwoon? No.

Dongwoon? Definitely no, eww.

Well... Please don’t hate me for this. But I dated G-Dragon for a while. You wouldn’t have guessed that, huh? Well it’s probably because we avoided each other like the plague. I really thought we were in love. We obviously weren’t. We were just young. He has long moved on(obviously, you can see it even in his concert acts), and I have moved on as well. I have a new boyfriend; he’s an idol. Right now, I’m going to my boyfriend’s home to surprise him. Nothing special, just wanted to visit him, since we haven’t seen each other in weeks.

I rode the taxi, and arrived at his home fast. I got my key. Yeah, I have a duplicate, he gave it to me. I opened the door,

and holy .

He’s kissing someone. A girl. And I thought he was different.

“F%&* you.” I said, running.

“Nicole, wait! It’s not what you think!” He’s such a fast runner. Ugh. He grabbed my arm and stopped me.

“It’s not what I think? Joon, are you actually kidding me? I know what I saw.” There. I said it. It’s Lee Joon, of MBLAQ. I know, you wouldn’t have guessed it as well. Rule #1 of dating an idol: Never, ever, mention his name on national television or radio.

“Nicole, just hear me out--”

“Hear you out?! There’s nothing more to explain!” Suddenly, the girl ran from his room to me.

“Joon--Nicole?!”

“Hyomin?!”

I felt the tears coming. I have never imagined this happening, my boyfriend and one of my best friends. Damn. And I thought Korean dramas were bad.

“Nicole, I’m really sorry.” Joon said.

“It’s okay. We’re over, anyway.” I said.

Joon had shock all over his face. Tch. He was shocked? What did he expect? That I come running back to him and kiss him and all would be okay?

“Nicole--” Hyomin said.

“Hyomin... I thought...” I was trying to suppress my tears. Nicole don’t cry Nicole don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry don’t cry. I hate crying in front of other people, unless they’re really close to me.

“Nicole, I’m just really sorry.” Hyomin said.

“But Nicole, I love you. I really do.” Joon said. I love you too, Joon, but you fooled me.

I ran away from them, and luckily, I saw a taxi. I sat at the back, since I don’t know if I would be able to control these tears right now, and I wouldn’t want the driver to see me crying. It would be huge news. I texted  the KARA members, Key, Jinwoon, and Dongwoon.

“Can you visit me later? Just need someone to talk to.”

Jiyoung replied: Sorry unnie, I’m on a show right now, remember? With Seungyeon unnie and Gyul unnie? Hara unnie is out, I think she’s dating someone.. Sorry unnie :(“

Hara replied: “Nicori~ I’m so sorry, but I already have plans for today. But I promise, when I get home, we’ll talk, okay? I’M REALLY SORRY. *hugs*”

Key replied: “Hey. I’m on Strong Heart right now. Can’t go.”

Jinwoon replied: “Hey Cole. We’re recording We Got Married right now. Can’t go.”

And Dongwoon didn’t reply. This is just great. Everyone’s on some show. When I need someone to talk to. When I just broke up with the guy I love. I have so many friends, but I could only share these things to the 3 goofs(Key, Jinwoon, Dongwoon), and my members. I have a hard time opening up to other people.

I arrived at our dorm, gloomily. I opened the door, and Dongwoon was there, watching TV.

“YO NICOLEEEE!” He was smiling. I just stared at nowhere. Wondering how he got in? Well, he’s one of the very few people my parents trust with my life. The others are the KARA members, and Key and Jinwoon.

“Something wrong?” Dongwoon asked.

I didn’t answer him. I just sat at the sofa. I’m not really having the best day here. He was watching Taegukgi, a movie which stars Jang Donggun and Wonbin. Damn, even Wonbin and Jang Donggun can’t cheer me up right now. I started crying. Dongwoon sat beside me, and gave me a spoon and a cup filled with strawberry ice cream, with chocolate sprinkles on it. This is what I love about my best friends, and my members. They know exactly how to ease my agony, my melancholy. Food is always the solution, or more specifically, ice cream. I kept on crying, while eating my ice cream. Dongwoon lowered the volume of the television, and then asked,

“What’s wrong? What happened?”

I burst into more tears. That bastard. He toyed with my emotions, making me believe that he was truly in love with me, while seeing other girls.

“I... I... just... I... broke up.... with Joon.” I said, sniffing.

“WHAT?!” Dongwoon erupted.

“Well, you heard me. I.. broke up... with him.” I just kept crying, sniffing, and eating ice cream.

“What? Why?” Dongwoon looked so concerned and angry at the same time. I cleared my throat first, I’d end up stuttering if I didn’t.

“I saw him kissing a girl. Hyomin.” Dongwoon looked so apalled.

“WHAT? THAT BASTARD!” I know, right? That bastard. That bastard I fell in love with. “Stop crying, Nicole. No man is worth your tears.”

“I should’ve known. I was just too in love that I did not see the signs. He was always away. He said that he had lots of recordings, when I barely see him on TV. Gosh, I’m so stupid.” I said.

“Please stop crying. And it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have introduced him to you. That sick bastard.” Dongwoon stood up, put his jacket on, and made his way to door. Uh-oh.

“You are NOT going to his house!” I said.

“Yes, I am, and I am going to beat the living out of him.” He said.

“No, you aren’t!”

“Yes, I am!”

Suddenly, the door opened, hitting both of us.

“OW!” We said in chorus.

“Ohmygosh, Nicole, Dongwoon, I’m so sorry!” HARA~~~~~~~! Now that Hara’s here, Dongwoon wouldn’t go to Joon’s now. I think he has this little thing for Hara. I’ve been trying to set them up, actually. But none of my antics worked.

“Nicori, what’s wrong? And Dongwoon, where are you going?” Hara asked.

“I broke up with Joon. And Dongwoon wants to go beat him up.” I was still eating my ice cream, but I’ve stopped crying. Ice cream really helps, I tell you.

“Don’t go, Dongwoon. What would you do if people saw you? What if the reporters see Joon’s beat-up face? Would you like that, huh, Dongwoon?” Hara really has her way with words. She’s so fierce, really. Her personality amazes me.

Dongwoon and I just sat on the sofa, while Hara sat on the chair near us. I told Hara everything, and my tears started creeping up my eyes again. Damn it, tears, why are you failing me again? By the time I finished sharing my story to Hara, I’ve eaten 3 cups of ice cream already.

After hearing my heartbreaking story, Hara told me, “You know, Nicole, there are lots of more amazing guys out there. And the one for you? He’s out there, waiting for you as well. He’ll come. You’ll never know, he might just be somewhere around.”