“Can I kiss you?...”

Out of the blue…it was a question that bothered my heart the most.

Eunhyuk was a friend. Someone I knew for two years only as my friend’s friend. That was until a month ago. Meeting him that night at my eldest sister’s house was just a coincidence. He was her second husband’s son. Eventually…he was now my nephew.

We see each other everyday for the whole summer. Having to live in a house with him was fun but I never knew that I would like him. He wasn’t even close to my ideal type of guy.

He was lying on my lap that night after we finished eating our dinner out. We just had a beach party with their relatives. The two of us headed outside towards the beachfront.

“Mwo?”

“Kiss…”

It would be my first kiss. And he was someone I already learned to like.

“Mianhae…” I whispered and looked at the endless sea. “My first kiss would be for my husband.”

We were physical. We hug and even sleep together without any malice. Although my sister was against it all the time, they eventually trusted that we would not do anything. He was the first man to ever get close to me that way.

He took my hand and closed his eyes. “That’s fine then…”

I watched him. He was holding my hand so tight. His hand fitted perfectly with my own. And even if I have small hands, he always says that it was just perfect to fit his own.

My heart beat went faster as I stared at him more. What really made me like him? Was it his cool manner in solving problems? The way he cooks for me when his parents were at work? Was it his funny antics? Was it because he always tries to sing for me even if he really couldn’t?

There may be a lot of reasons that I do…but I am scared. He never told me that he likes me. Not even once.

Slowly, I placed my other hand over his eyes…and planted a soft kiss on his forehead. That’s the least I could do.

A smile formed on his lips as he tried to remove my hand.

“What are you doing? Take it off…”

“I can’t…”

Tonight would be our last night together. Tomorrow, I will go back home. And the next time we will meet again…it would be at school. I don’t expect anything…this would be just a mere summer romance.

After tonight…I wonder, would he still hug me and tell me that I smell like freshly picked flowers? Would he still hold me before he sleep and tell me that I am small and fragile? Would he still hold my hand and tell me that it was just too perfect to fit in his hand? These questions lingered in my mind.

~♥~

“Are you ready?” I whispered and took in a deep breath.

It has been a week since I went back home and it was the first day of the new term. I stood behind the door of the gym and peeked. Eunhyuk’s last class today would be Physical Education.

“Oh, annyeong!” someone almost shouted.

I looked back and saw my classmate in middle school walk towards me. I pulled her fast and hid her behind me.

She chuckled. “Yah, what are you doing?”

I peeked again to see if anybody heard her. I drew a breath out.

“Why are you suddenly coming out of nowhere? I was hiding and you came out like that. Are you trying to have me seen?”

“Wae?”, she looked inside the gym. “Is there someone you like in there?”

Changing the conversation I said, “What about you? What are you doing here? I thought you were studying somewhere else?”

“I changed schools…oh! Oppa!”

She ran inside as soon as the bell rang. I on the other hand was still battling against myself if I would go inside.

“Imo (aunt) why are you here?”

My back stiffened when I heard that voice. Eunhyuk was standing behind me…and my mind was battling whether to look or not.

“Eunhyuk~ah,” I turned.

“Imo mwoya? You’re his aunt now?”

She was holding onto his arm. What is this?, I said to myself. It wasn’t the first time that I felt this way and I know why. I was hurt again.

I looked at him but he cannot meet my eyes anymore.

“Do you know each other?” I asked softly.

“Of course. He is my boyfriend.”

My world suddenly went black and white. So you were in a relationship all this time? Why did you play with me?, I wanted to ask these questions. Instead, I smiled at them.

“Yah, Eunhyuk~ah,” I patted his shoulder. “Introduce your aunt to your girlfriend formally. How can you not have good manners?”

That day, I knew that everything won’t be the same. If I had given him a kiss…then what could’ve happened? If I didn’t go to my sister’s home during summer, then where would I be?

I felt my world spinning in slow motion. I was not crying, but my heart was drenched with unshed tears. I watched them leave; he didn’t even turn his back. But, was that sorrow in his eyes? I would’ve wanted to hear him tell me that he really likes me…

But…that day, he just left forgetting those days and nights that we spent together playing his favorite game. The times we shared a meal in the same plate. The times when he wrapped samgyupsal bigger than what I could eat…

Everything just disappeared all of a sudden. And I stood right there, smiling...