Username: AigooKeyandTaemin

Reviewed by: myungbabe

Story Link

Story Summary:
Can you just stand there and watch your bestfriend make a fool of herself? Or will you just keep quiet and make a fool out of yourself for pretending that you didn't see anything because you want her to be happy?
She, is the source of happiness, the reason of his smiles. She, Kim Namjoo, is the one Lee Sungyeol loves.

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Title: (5/5): The title is simple, yet eye catching. Grammar is correct and not too flashy. 

Description and Foreword (5/10): After reading the foreword, I really don't know what this story is about. It doesn't example enough for me to want to go on, I'm still not clear on if this is a love triangle or not. I have no clue who the guy (I'm assuming it's a guy) thinking the second line is. The foreword is really unnecessary. 

Poster (3/5): The title doesn't really stand out with that floral background. I also think it overpowers the poster too much, making it look a little busy. I haven't read your story yet, so I'm not sure if this is a love triangle or not (as stated above, I can't tell from just reading the foreword) if it isn't then the 2 main characters should stand out more instead of being the same size. The poster also doesn't really reflect an angst, drama feeling to the story.

Plot (20/25): I hate apink. I like the plot. It's a tad cliche, but the fact how she still stayed with Myungsoo even if she was getting played by him and didn't go to Sungyeol (also how he didn't confess) was different than more oneshots out there.

Characters (15/15): Each character stayed solid. I think that's important in a oneshot because it's clearly not enough time for them to develop. I think it's best to have characters start to change if the story was chaptered, but since this isn't, it makes it much better to read if they were the same. Namjoo changed slightly, in emotions (from happy, to just... depressed). Not her behavior. Despite what Sungyeol said about her being different, I felt like she was the same. 

Grammar and Spelling (8/10): If you have time, you can check over this story. There were some minor mistakes with past and present tense used in this story. Other than that, nothing big. 

Flow and Style (6/10): It would have been nice to see how Namjoo felt towards Myungsoo and a little bit more on his character to show that maybe he wasn't the faithful kind of person. gosh, i'm such a myungie biased person. Sungyeol's character was really good in this. I would have liked to know a little bit more of his relationship with Myungsoo. A litle rushed.. but not bad since this is just a oneshot. I think you tried to cover a topic that's too wide for just a short oneshot (from Yeollie knowing about them dating, to him witnessing the cheater Myungsoo, to him telling Namjoo). I think you should really be putting each person's speech on a new line instead of in one paragraph, it gets confusing to read.

Originality (8/10): Most stories out there would just have the "best friend" or "hurt" guy confess, in this case Sungyeol, but he didn't. And how Namjoo still stayed with Myungsoo, is different for me. 

Entertainment (5/10): Points taken off for having apink. I really wouldn't read an apink story. But points being there for Myungsoo and Sungyeol. Don't take this to heart please, it's simply because I hate "pinkfinite". It's like that sore, hateful spot inside me.

TOTAL: 75 / 100 

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