"How about you.. ?" I asked the sweet girl next to me. A smile she used to have on her face is gone. Although we already arrived in front of her house, she didn’t get out of the car yet, she was held back by something that I just offered to her. She looked down to her shoes, trying to be strong by holding her hand one to another. Trembling, she started to speak "I actually don’t want this .. but, if that's what you want, I'm okay with that.. " her voice was so soft and weak, she tried to catch her breath, trying not to cry in front of me. Girl.. I know you too well..

I couldn’t help to see her suffering like this, but didn't know why I dare to asked her a break. No, not because there were another woman. Small fights  that happened every day made me a little sick. "Take care.. " were all the words she spoke before she got out from the car through the hard pouring rain. She was sobbing and tried to hide it with her hands as she ran to her house.

And at that time I felt so stupid, stupid..

Since then that thing always came across my mind, she was surely didn’t want this to be hapened, she told it herself. It was my decision, and I regret it all..

"Baekhyun-ah, will you play soccer after shcool today?" Luhan asked me while we were walking down the corridor during break time. There were also some students passing by, going back to their class. "Yes, I will" I answered briefly, because actually that question had just woke me from my thoughts about her.

"Oh It's Nana!” he suddenly said a name. A name of a girl who I really miss.

I looked towards Luhan’s direction, that's right, it's Nana. She was carrying some thick books in her hands and looked like in trouble because some of the book seemed going to fall, but she managed to balance her body again so that the books remained in place. She let out a sigh of relief because the books didn’t fall.

"Nana!" someone called behind her as that person ran to her. But when she looked up to where the voice came she lost her balance and caused the books on her hands falling to to the floor. "Oh no~" she complained with a little laugh. Just like Nana that I knew, cheerful. "Yah Baekhyun-ah, aren't you going to help her?" Luhan said with as he nudged my arm, but I just kept quiet and watching Nana. I couldn’t do anything, even though I wanted to help her with the books. But the man who had just called her earlier was taking an action before me.

"Ah what's wrong with you, huh? Really.. " Luhan complaint as he walked to the class when I was still standing in the doorway. I didn't know what was I doing there. Her figure is so precious, even there was someone who indirectly replacing me but it's alright, as long as I could see her face, it's alright.

"It's all because you called me! These books messed up now" Nana said jokingly as she managed the books. "What? What have I done?? It’s your own fault, you didn't ask me for help to carry all these heavy books and did it yourself instead" The boy said as he helped Nana. He is Kai, Nana’s new classmate, they sure were a close friend, but now they seemed to be closer because they got in the same class this year. I was never jealous of kai, but this time, I admit, yes.

Nana patted Kai’s head with a book, "bad Kai!". Kai was just laughing as if he liked how Nana treated him. They seemed very close, and my heart ached seeing them. Suddenly Kai caught my eyes and he whispered something to nana, I hurried to the class, hiding from them because I felt caught.

I sat back down at my chair, a heavy breath slipped through my lungs. As if wanted to throw away all the regrets and pain on my chest. Unfortunately that didn't work on this situation. Not long after that our teacher entered the classroom. All students greeted him giving a sign that the lesson would begin. I took out a textbook and some stationery from my bag, but the two figures over the window of the corridor took my attention again. Nana and Kai was walking to class, carrying books in their hands.

I let out a sigh, again, hoping as I took out of breath the pain would also reduced.

The bell rang, school was over. Me and my friends getting ready to do our routine soccer practice. I'm not very good at soccer like Luhan and Xiumin, but with a routine practice like this I just had a chance to get some exercise. And in fact this is the time for us to get together and have fun after studying. I was waiting for my turn to play and sat on the couch next to the field. Chanyeol  beside me was very keen to see the others who were playing, "shoot! Shoot! Aaah ~" he commented when Luhan failed to shoot the ball into the goal. I let my lips curving a smile, why is smiling so hard these days for Byun Baekhyun? I asked my self.

I looked away from the field to the school building, and I my eyes caught them again, for the second time, today. Nana and Kai were out of the school building and going to the parking lot. They were talking about things that seemed so funny, Nana was laughing with one hand over cutely, as usual, just like Nana that I used to know.

And again I have to bear with the pain seeing her smile, the smile which I didn’t see for a long time, the smile that used to cheer me up.

She looked at me

I wasn't trying to turn away but she avoided my gaze. Soon a car stopped in front of them. Nana entered the car and Kai closed the car’s door for her, then waved his hand as the car out of the school’s area. Kai was looking at me, but I got focused on the field again.

What was actually He trying to do to me?

Once the soccer was over I went home, Mom greeted me and I told her a little about school today. I felt very tired and excuse myself to the bedroom. I breathed heavily as I threw my bag onto the floor. I rushed to the bathroom to get a very cold shower, but I went to wardrobe to pick up a shirt first. I opened the wardrobe, seing a stack of  t-shirt that I usually wear at home. I suddenly remembered about Nana..

"Baekhyun-ah, I keep one of your t-shirt here at my home" the sweet voice of her talking on the phone. Nana had one of my shirt because I asked her to picked it up from my locker  but in the field we didn’t get to meet because she had to go home quickly.

"Oh, right?" I made a small talk. "It smells like you.. " she said cutely. I smiled, "Keep it then"

First she insisted to turn it back to me, but when I asked about it she always said she forgot to bring it with her.

I took a heavy breath and immediately grabbed one of my t-shirts and recalled what she always did when we were together. She liked to cling on my shirt and  kept smiling, "Baekhyun-ah~ Let's eat some ice creams, shall we? please~" she would said and I couldn't help it so we always ended up going to the ice cream shop and bought one with a big size to share.

After having a shower I felt more refreshed, I sat on my bed while drying my hair. My cell phone suddenly rang, signaling that there was an incoming message. I  quickly took it and opened the message.

There is a match tomorrow against 2.4 class! Do not forget to bring your soccer shoes and our uniform!

-Luhan-

I gave a short reply to the message saying that I will do it. A folder 'inbox' appeared on my phone’s monitor, my hand gently pressing the button on the phone and opened that folder. Luhan, Nana, Nana, and Nana..
 

Messages from Nana was still saved, I began to open them one by one randomly.

Have you eat, honey? :3  | 12/06/15 06.32 PM

I miss you :'  | 12/06/15 07.55 PM

good luck with your math test tomorrow! I love you * hugss * | 12/06/15 10.03 PM

Baekhyun-ah, I'm sorry..  I was wrong to talk to you like that, I'm really sorry, okay ..? | 12/06/16 11.15 PM

Baekhyun .. you're really mad at me huh? are you asleep? If so, once again I really sorry. Good night, honey. Sweet dream, I love you.. | 12/06/16 11.45 PM

I decided to closed it. I hate it. I hate missing her like this. I missed her but I couldn't tell it to her..

I bumped my body onto the bed and closed my eyes. Kim Nana, I really really missing you right now..