Four white walls came into vision, the same four white walls that haunt his dreams at night. Nothing decorates them, just plain old white paint that has faded with the years, bottles filled with some weird red looking liquid, the same one that will be going through his veins in a few minutes, he trembles just at the thought. As he settles down on his usual chair awaiting for the moment when that red liquid will be pumped through his veins, he stares out into the room, the same room that has seen him suffer and crumble to what little is left of him now, the same room that will see him go when his time has come.

“Good morning Mr. Kim, you’re here early today” said a sudden voice coming from behind him to shake his hand.

“Dr. Lee, you should know by know I like getting this done as fast as possible” said the man making himself comfortable on the chair located at the far end of the room.

“Going to see the children after this I assume” Dr. Lee said as he hooked the red liquid to an IV pole.

“That’s the only thing that brings me joy nowadays” said the man closing his eyes and he felt the needle going into his arms as the red liquid washed through his veins.

Kim Jaejoong, 27 years old lead a very promising life. Graduated top of his class in Music business a few years back while helped him snag a job at one of Korea’s top companies, SM Entertainment. Everything seemed to be going his way, great job, nice pay, girls and guys alike falling at him feet, that is until a year ago. The dreaded day as he himself calls it, the day he was diagnosed with Leukemia, he was forced to quit his job and live confined to four walls be it his apartment or his hospital bed.

“There all done” Dr. Lee say as he pulled the needle out of Jaejoong’s arm “I suggest you stay here for a couple of minutes don’t want you getting dizzy or nauseous” and with that the Dr. Lee left, leaving Jaejoong alone with his thoughts once again.

“He should also know I don’t like waiting” Jaejoong sighed as he picked up his coat and walked out of the room towards the children’s play area.

As he made his way to the children’s area in the third floor he began to feel dizzy but decided to ignore it, “nothing out of the usual” he thought, as he walked into the familiar setting he had gotten accustom to, he was greeted by a group of kids clinging to him and calling him over to play with them.

This he what he lived for nowadays, the children’s smiles were his own little ecstasy. He loved being able to play with them even if he didn’t feel at all too well, he knew that the children longed for him and that was cure enough. He would sing to them, and play hide and seek which was their favorite past time, no matter how ill he felt he pushed all that away just for this moment.

“Hyung, Hyung one more time” one of the children said as he tugged on Jaejoong sleeve.

“Hyung needs a little break…” Jaejoong said catching his breath “We’ll play some more later ok”

“Ok hyung.” and with that the child left skipping down the garden to catch up with his friends as Jaejoong sat down by a near by tree to catch his breath.

“They love playing with you” said a man that was now sitting beside him

“I love playing with them too” Jaejoong replied as he brought his knees up to his chest and rested his arms on them.

“Jung Yunho” said the man extending his hand for Jaejoong.

“Kim Jaejoong” he said as he shakes the man hand “haven’t seen you around before”

“Oh I’m one of the new nurses assigned to the kids, I’ve heard quite a lot about you though” Yunho said while looking over at the kids.

“Hopefully it’s all good” Jaejoong laughed as he regained his composure and sat with his back against the tree.

“Oh just that you love hanging out with the kids even if they do tire you out” Yunho laughed looking over at Jaejoong who was also laughing.

“Well it’s what I live for” Jaejoong said as he sat up, feeling dizzy from his treatment he stumbled and almost fainted if it wasn’t for Yunho catching him just in time.

“You ok there?” Yunho asked as he held onto Jaejoong’s hand.

“Yeah must be from all the exercises the kids made me do” Jaejoong said laughing as he let go of Yunho’s hand “ I’ll see you around then” and with that he left.

As the days went by, Yunho and Jaejoong got more acquainted to each other. Every time Jaejoong had chemotherapy he would stop by and play with the kids for a while, afterwards sitting down by the willow tree in the garden and chatting the day away with Yunho.

“I’m off in a few minutes if you want we can grab a cup of coffee before you head home” Yunho said out of the blue one day as they sat down in their usual spot.

Jaejoong hesitated for a while, should he? Shouldn’t he? But deep down he knew that his feelings for the other had grown over the past couple of months and maybe, just maybe, he had a chance to find love before he parted.

Their coffee date turned into a usual routine for them, every day they would meet by the willow tree and go drink coffee together parting ways shortly after. Coffee dates soon lead to dinner dates and both soon found themselves smitten with each other.

“I know this great Italian place down the street from the hospital that serves the best pasta carbonara I have ever tasted” Yunho said as he greeted Jaejoong one day after seeing the latter playing with the kids.

“If I had known you were into Italian I would have cooked for you myself” Jaejoong said smiling as he sat down next to Yunho under the willow tree.

“You cook?” Yunho looked baffled. “You’re like the perfect package” he said shyly while looking away.

“Why thank you Mr. Jung. It would be this perfect package’s pleasure to cook for you tomorrow night, what do you say?” Jaejoong said winking at Yunho who had turned another shade of red from embarrassment.

That was the first time in the years Jaejoong been sick that he had people over to his house much less cook for someone. He set up to clean this apartment, of course being the perfectionist he is, he wanted everything to be organized and cleaned for Yunho arrival later that night. He doesn’t know how or from where he got his energy but he managed to tidy up his house just in time, it didn’t even matter to him how exhausted he was afterwards.

Jaejoong loved having Yunho around, the latter helped him remembered how much he loved being in the kitchen creating different dishes and trying new things. Visiting Jaejoong became a usual routine for Yunho, he would get off his shift and head over to the other house to see what new dish the man had prepared for him that day.

“This…. Tastes…. amazing….” Yunho said between bites as he savored the place Jaejoong had cooked for him that particular day.

“Well I’m really glad you liked it” Jaejoong said while laughing at Yunho who was about to the plate from how good the food was.

“Thank you for that lovely dinner” Yunho said as he reached for his coat

“You are more than welcome, you know I love cooking” Jaejoong said as he opened the door for Yunho.

“You know…” Yunho said as he turned around to grab Jaejoong hand in his own “I’ve been thinking, I know we’ve spent a lot of time together over the past few months and I hope you have enjoyed them as I have…” Jaejoong could only nod at this point feeling as if his heart would pop out of his chest in any moment “…I guess I just want you to know that I really like you” Yunho said as he brushed his fingers against Jaejoong cheek.

“I like you too” was all Jaejoong could say once he found his breath. Yunho moved forward closing the gap between them as he brought their lips closer sealing them in a kiss.

“Would Mr. Perfect Package, do me the honor of being my boyfriend then?” Yunho said as he broke the kiss and rested his forehead against Jaejoong. The latter could only nod and laugh, as he had seemed to have lost his voice once again.

Jaejoong never expected to find love in the place he hates the most, it was unexpected but he welcomed the situation with open arms. He knew that he couldn’t be with Yunho the rest of his life as he would have wished but he was certain that he would make his last few months as memorable with the other as possible.

As the months passed Jaejoong health began to decline, the doctors had told him he had a few more months to live.

“Move in with him” were the firsts words Jaejoong said to Yunho that afternoon after meeting with his doctors. He knew it was a rather harsh decision but he loved Yunho and if his time in this world was going to be cut short he wanted to spend the rest of his breaths at Yunho’s side.

Yunho accepted Jaejoongs offer without any hesitation, he knew that he wanted to be by Jaejoongs side no matter what life brought on them and this was just another way of showing the man how much he meant to him.

“Baby, are you ok? You look rather pale” Yunho said at dinner one night, while he scanned his lover that was sitting across from him. Jaejoong just nodded standing up and running to the bathroom.

That’s when it all started going downhill for Jaejoong. He would wake up in the morning feeling nauseous, he neglected to eat and started losing weight drastically, most morning would be spent throwing up what he eat the previous night. The chemotherapy wasn’t helping him like he hoped, his hair started to fall out which soon lead to hiding his now thin hair in a wig. The once lively man that loved to watch and play with the children in the hospital garden was now a mere memory.

“Is there something you would like to tell me Jaejoong?” Yunho said one night as they were lying in bed. Jaejoong’s heart stopped, he didn’t know what to do, he didn’t want to trouble Yunho with his problems because there were just that HIS PROBLEMS and there was nothing Yunho could do about it. Then again how much longer could he hide it from the other?

“Why the sudden question?” was all Jaejoong’s mind could formulate at the time.

“You’ve changed” was all Yunho could say as he lifted his lover’s chin to they were looking eye to eye. “You used to be this energetic, happy go lucky nothing can stand in my way kind of guy, where did he go?”

“He’s dying a little more every day” was what Jaejoong wanted to say but couldn’t as his emotions betrayed him and his started crying into his lovers’ arms.

“Shhh, don’t cry baby, whatever it is I’m sure we can work it out” Yunho said as he Jaejoong’s back trying to calm the latter down.

“That’s the thing Yunho, we can’t work it out. There’s nothing to work out” Jaejoong said between sobs. “I’m dying and neither one of us can stop it”

“What do you mean you’re dying?” Yunho said as he sat up on the bed embracing his lover in a hug.

“I was diagnosed with Leukemia almost 2 years ago, that’s why I go to the hospital, that’s why we meet” Jaejoong said as he took Yunho hands and intertwined them with his. “The doctors told me I just have a few months left, I know I should have told you earlier but I just wanted to make you happy, I didn’t want you to worry whether or not I would wake up in the morning or be here when you came home from work, I just wanted to live happily the rest of my time on this earth next to you, the man I love”

Yunho was at a loss of words, he was losing the man he loved to cancer and there was nothing he could do to stop it. As Jaejoong’s words sank, he embraced the latter tighter rocking back and forth thinking to himself it was all just a dream.

“Do you have therapy today?” Yunho asked Jaejoong the next morning over breakfast. Jaejoong just nodded not able to look the other in the eye as he felt that his world was finally crashing down on him. “I’m going with you then”.

Soon enough, the coffee and dinner dates where replaced with visits to the oncologist and chemotherapy sections. Jaejoongs’ health was deteriorating at a rapid speed and doctors didn’t guarantee him for much longer.

“Jaejoong open up, please!” Yunho yelled out as he tried but failed to open the bathroom door where Jaejoong had be locked up for the past thirty minutes. As if on cue, the door opened slowly and what he saw frightened him, there was Jaejoong lying on the floor clenching at his stomach from pain.

“I’m calling the paramedics” Yunho said as he rushed to Jaejoongs’ side holding onto the other as he called for help.

Jaejoong was sure he didn’t have much time left and the hospital wasn’t the place he wanted to spend the rest of his days. He begged his doctors to let him go out and die in peace but both his doctors and Yunho overheard his pleas.

“I love you” Jaejoong said one night as he intertwined their hands together. “ Please never forget that. I love you so much”

“I love you too JJ, more than you’ll ever imagine” Yunho said as he embraced his lover into a hug and kissed him softly on the lips.

Yunho would never forget the next few hours of his life as Jaejoongs heart monitor slowly started decreasing and his breathing slowly died down.

“I love you, please don’t forget me” Jaejoong said as he held onto Yunho hand for one last time.

“How could I forget you if you will always be with me…..” Yunho said as he took Jaejoong hand and placed it over his heart “…right here.” Yunho leaned down as he kissed Jaejoong one last time and closed his eyes.

It had been a traumatic few days and Yunho didn’t know where he got the strength to go through his day without Jaejoong there to cheer him on. He had left him so broken and without the tools to fix himself.

Jaejoong had asked to be buried underneath his favorite tree in the hospital, the willow tree where he had first meet Yunho. The hospital was kind enough to grant him his last wish and Yunho complied.

After getting off his shift every day, Yunho walked to the willow tree and sat down next to Jaejoong tombstone. He would talk to the other as he was still there telling him about his day and how much he missed him.

“I found your letter” Yunho said one day as he sat down next to the tombstone. “I haven’t read it yet, I haven’t been strong enough” he said as his tears started flowing freely. “I need you here so much” he said between sobs.

As he was about to open the letter a sudden gust of wind rushed through and flew it away from his hands as he got up to run after it, he noticed the wind had deposited in the near by bench where he and Jaejoong used to sit.

“I guess you do want me to read it” he said as he removed the letter from the bench and opened it.