What a waste this place has become…

            Kai blew out smoke, watching as it swirled and formed a small cloud above him. He sat with one of his close friends, Se Hun, smoking a cigarette on the school’s side doorsteps. They had cut class — again. But it’s not like their teacher cared just as long as she had her gossip tabloids and nail polish to keep herself busy, she’d let the students do whatever the hell they wanted.

            He looked towards the metal door to examine the new piece of graffiti added to the gallery. The door was already overwhelmed by other writings and drawings to the point no one could see a speck of the original paint color of the door. Cigarette butts and some crack bags that didn’t belong to them were scattered around their premises.

            Se Hun was the first to break the peaceful silence when he puffed out some smoke and turned towards Kai, “So did you hear?”

            “About what?”

            Around here, everything spreads like wildfire. You tell someone one thing and without the next hour, most of the slums of Downtown Seoul would know. It was hard to keep a secret here seeing as all the residents had nothing better to do with their lives.

            “Sulli’s leaving for England. She got a scholarship to study there.”

            Kai suddenly stopped. What?      

            He suddenly threw down his cigarette, and crushed the cigarette under his Nikes. Even though Sulli was not there in his presence, he remembered her pleading for him to stop smoking. It’s not liked him liked smoking, because honestly, that stuff tasted like . But it helped a lot to calm his nerves. Though, now he slightly regretted getting rid of the cigarette because what Se Hun told him was causing turmoil in his state of mind.

            “You’re just ing with me, bro.” Kai tried to laugh his nervousness off but Se Hun shook his head and took another puff from his cigarette.

            “Nope. Krystal told me.”

            And that’s when Kai realized Se Hun was being legit. His Sulli, uh, he meant Sulli was leaving. She really was leaving…

            Kai sighed with frustration as he ran his hands through his hair forcefully. How the hell was he supposed to react? Se Hun was watching him so was it okay for Kai to look weak and freak out? Or was he supposed to play the always-unfazed guy?

            All that raced through his mind was the fact that he was about to lose the only thing that made him stay in this hopeless ghetto. As he put his face in his hands, he could still remember every single detail of their first meeting.

Kai sighed with discontent. He had to do community service for getting in trouble for trespassing at the old warehouses. It wasn’t like he was surprised since he had already done community service for all the trouble he had gotten himself into previously. He just couldn’t believe they chose for him to help out at the library. Who actually reads books around here?

            Kai picked up some random high school level books and headed to that aisle. There, he saw a girl also putting books back in order. The reason why she stood out so much to him was because of her hair. It was long, dark, and untainted by dye, which was rare where he lived because all the ghetto girls dyed the out of their hair with shades of red.  Her innocence face of rosy cheeks and bright eyes made her look quite pretty.

            Like a freaking idiot, Kai just so happened to accidentally drop the books he was holding. As he scrambled to pick them up, a pale, dainty hand held out one of the books to him. When Kai looked up, he was met with a gentle smile, “I think you dropped this.”

            “Uh, I-I’m Kai.” He blurted out.

            She giggled either at his embarrassment or the way he introduced himself, he hope it was neither. “Oh, I know. Big, bad boy Kai, right? You’ve made quite a name for yourself.”     

            Kai’s cheeks colored with embarrassment. For the first time, he wanted to kick himself for building his reputation up for the way it is, especially if it’s the thing that ruins his chances with this rare species of girls.

            “Actually, my real name is Jongin. Kim Jongin.” He rushed his words, attempting to somehow change his bad boy image.

            “Jongin? I think that suits you better.” She smiled as she held out her hand to him, “I don’t like my real name, but you can call me Sulli.”

            And that was the beginning of a budding friendship with Choi Sulli.

-x-

            Sulli found it weird for her and Krystal to be in the Samchungdong area in some coffee shop catching up. Although she disliked their ghetto neighborhood, she also found it uncomfortable to be in a somewhat civil place.

            “So,” Sulli took a sip of her mocha, “How are things between you and Se Hun?”

            Krystal’s face light up with a genuine smile, “We’ve been great. I think I’ve might have found the one too.”

            Sulli nodded, feeling happy for her friend. Before, Krystal was always interested in these good-for-nothing guys that didn’t treat her right. She was glad when Se Hun came along and treated Krystal like she deserved.

            Afterwards, there was a strained silence. Somehow, Sulli felt like they both knew where this conversation was headed. But Sulli didn’t want to take a chance on that and was determined to make Krystal be the first to speak.

            “So what’s going to happen to him?” Krystal’s voice was almost a whisper as she set down her Americano.

            “Who?” Sulli’s eyes were casted down at the table. She knew exactly who Krystal was referring but still asked.

            “Kai.” Krystal answered back. She seemed just the slightest bit annoyed with her friend for having to even ask for his name.

            Sulli closed her eyes and massaged her temple. She didn’t know. She really didn’t know what was going to happen with her and Jongin. Sulli didn’t even know where she stood with him.

            They had broken up, maybe about half a year ago. Still, Sulli would be a big, fat liar if she said she didn’t have any more feelings for him. Honestly, she didn’t quite know the reason for them breaking up. They were always fighting. Fighting because Jongin wouldn’t listen to her when she told him not to do reckless things and he would always tell her she was smothering him.

            And it’s not like she didn’t blame herself. Because she really did. The months that followed their breakup, she wondered if maybe she had tried less to keep him out of trouble, if they would still be together. Then she would wonder if he stayed up all night and thought about it too. Would he be blaming himself like she did?  

            They just got to a point where they both gave up. She had lost faith in him.

            And the fact that they had a mutual group of friends didn’t help the matter either. A lot of times, there would be awkward meetings where they wouldn’t acknowledge each other’s presence. And that hurt because it was almost like all the memories and moments they shared meant nothing. But Sulli didn’t care if Jongin didn’t care anymore because what she said that time was true and she would never take it back — even if she were to find someone new.

            Sulli glanced with worry to her phone. She had five missed calls from Jongin which she hadn’t picked up because she was studying at the library until now. And what worried her more was that he never called her unless it was very important.

            She was just about home to her apartment, when she heard a familiar voice call out to her.

            “Sulli.”

            Turning around, she gasped. There was Jongin, all battered and bruised up. His clothes were a mess and his hair was disarrayed. He was bleeding from the corner of his mouth, but still, he tried to look strong for Sulli.

            “Yeah, I’m pretty messed up.” Jongin tried to laugh but Sulli could tell it hurt for him to laugh by the way he began tentatively touching his rib cage.

            “Oh my God,” Sulli ran over, slanging his arm over her shoulders to support him, “C’mon, we have to get you cleaned up.”

            Sulli was so thankful that her apartment was on the fourth flight. She was worried that Jongin had a broken bone or something that couldn’t be helped with alcohol and some bandages. Quickly, she threw open her apartment door and guided Jongin carefully onto the couch, where he instantly set down, almost lifeless.

            Sulli was rummaging her medicine and first aid cabinet with urgency. She cursed herself for not cleaning and organizing it out but it quickly left her mind after she was able to find some gauzes, bandages, and rubbing alcohol.

            “Ow, ow, ow!” Jongin his teeth as Sulli rubbed gently at the small cut on his cheekbone. Sulli was bewildered. This boy could pretend he was fine when he got jumped but when it came to a bit of rubbing alcohol, he was like a little boy at the doctor’s.

            After much more hissing and teeth, Sulli was able to bandaged Jongin up. It was a relief when she found that he didn’t have a broken bone, but maybe a fracture on a few of his fingers. Thank God she had taken that medical course a while back or else she wouldn’t know how to properly help Jongin.

            Sulli didn’t know what this panic was in her chest. When she had seen him all beaten up and staggering, it felt like she had limited air. So many what-ifs had wondered through her mind, even the morbid thought of death. But now, she felt like she could breathe again when she saw that he was a matter of fact alive and on her couch, watching her with worried eyes.

            “S-Sulli, what’s wrong?”

            Sulli shook her head. He was the one hurt and he’s asking her if shewas okay? But then she noticed that tears were starting to fill her vision and threatened to spill over.

            “It’s just I was so scared!” Sulli hastily wiped at her tears, hating how she was the one not hurting and dared to cry.  

            But then Jongin chuckled softly, touching his rib cage as he did so.

            “I’m not going to die because of a few bruises and fractures,” He slowly got off the couch to sit in front of Sulli on the carpet floor, “So don’t cry, okay?”

            She slowly nodded, feeling her chin being lifted by a single finger.

            Her first kiss tasted like salty tears and Kim Jongin.

-x-

            Frustrated with thoughts of her, Kai got up from his seat in math class, disregarding the threats of his math teacher behind her.

            She was leaving. Today.

            Was there really no hope in him and this place anymore? Had she really lost faith? How about that time when they decided they wanted to believe in a place that seemed to have no future. But he wondered if that “hope” had not died.

            “Sulli, what are we doing here?” Kai asked incredulously. They were by a weed choked side garden outside of school that Kai didn’t even know existed. There was trash everywhere; the bed of weeds had hard, dry soil, and weeds upon weeds.

            She held up some average looking seeds in her hands to him, “Look, they’re rose seeds.”

            Kai raised his eyebrow with disbelief. She didn’t really believe that something could actually grow here, right? But judging from the bright smile on her face, she really did.

            “These seeds are going to be a representation of our love,” She giggled cheekily that Kai couldn’t help but smile himself, “We fell in love in a hopeless place.”

            “And now,” she continued, setting some of the gardening tools she had in her hands down on the concrete pavement by the bed of weeds, “I don’t care if you help or not but I’m planting these.”

            Kai watched as she put on some gloves, getting ready to pull out some weeds. Kai could feel a wide grin on his face. This girl could never stop giving him butterflies.

            “Okay, okay,” he laughed, taking her hands, “I’llpull the weeds. You do the soil. Let’s see if this actually grows.”

-x-

            Kai fell on his knees, his bottom lip trembling with disbelief. In front of him were beautiful red roses. There were no trash lying around the flower bed and there was a new, tiny fence around it. It had fought against the odds. Roses do not grow in the ghetto. Roses do not grow from barren soil.

            But it had happened. And he wondered if Sulli knew that their hope plant had actually grown up from tough soil. When he noticed a note paper-clipped to a single piece of string that ran from two sides of the tiny fence, he realized that maybe Sulli had seen the roses before him. The note was in English but the words were simple enough even for him. It was written in loopy script — Sulli’s. Kai would have known that handwriting anywhere.

            We say goodbye but never let go…

            Crushing the piece of paper in his clutched fist, Kai grabbed at his hair. Why was he so stupid? Why had he let Sulli go that easily?

            Suddenly, there was a hand on his shoulder with a familiar voice with the slight lisp.

            “Let’s get to the airport.” Se Hun smiled at his friend with his famous I-got-this grin. He pulled out his phone, dialed a number, and when his call got through, he spoke casually like there was no rush, “Krystal? Yeah, I’m going to need you to stall. We’ll be right there.”

-x-

            Sulli sighed, taking a look around the airport, maybe her last of Korea. She had her two suitcases with her and a thin coat on. Usually, she hated crowded places but right now, she was trying to linger as long as possible before she bid the continent of Asia farewell.

            “I’m gonna miss you.” Krystal gave her a suffocating hug, “You have to call and visit as much as possible, okay?”

            Sulli hugged her back and nodded. She was going to miss Krystal too. Who else could be as wild and crazy as she was? Who else could help her feel a lot better with her rants and goofiness?

            Jongin can.

            Stop it, she told herself, he’s not coming. He doesn’t care anymore. She had to leave, start anew, and finally get over him.

            As she stared to make her way to her flight, Krystal suddenly her arm to pull her back. When Sulli glanced back, Krystal gave an, “Uhh.”

            Sulli sighed. What was Krystal doing? He was not coming.

            But then…

            “Wait! Wait! Sulli! Wait!”

            She spun around. It couldn’t be.

            But it was, snaking in and around the throngs of people was Jongin along with Se Hun closely behind.

            The people, the sounds, they suddenly all became a blur. All she could see was that beloved face filled with anxiety and love that only looked at her. He was running, and she stood still. And for a moment, it felt like they were the only two people in the world.

            And inside, she felt a sliver of faith creep up into her heart.  

Contest entry for Captured Moments