Boa spoke with her manager, and he arranged for her to practice with her choreographer first, and simply use the demo versions of the song for rehearsals as well as the minus ones. The choreographers agreed to this, but one of them, a female one, wondered what the problem was. So, in one of their sessions, she decided to ask.

"I didn't think it would be that way," Boa muled. "I never meant to do it, I really didn't. I had hoped that I would be able to get closer to him, so we could work better together, you see, and it all just back-fired. I don't know what to do!"

"Honey, don't do it again. You knew it was wrong, and now, for sure you do," she said, speaking as gently as she could. "Now, if you really want to properly apologize, go to him and say so. Tell him you're sorry as sincerely as possible and show the dude what you've got. I hear you're quite the singer over in Asia. How's about showing your stuff?"

Boa looked at her choreographer's encouraging yet expectant look, and that made her feel better, stronger. Suddenly, a surge of positivity coursed through her, and she remembered what she felt when she was preparing for her Japanese debut all those years ago--the thought that 'I can do this' and this? This was just an obstacle. This was just a hindrance that she had to go through, the icy walls that she had to either melt or tear down in order to get where she wants to get, be what she wants to be, and right now, what she wanted to be was Asia's representative. She wanted to make Lee Sooman, the man who had put so much faith in her, as well as her family, proud of her. No--she not only wanted them to be proud of her, she wanted Korea to be proud. She wanted to really raise Korea's flag, raise it high and show it to the rest of the world. She wanted to say: this is Boa!

She thanked the choreographer for her advice and words of encouragement, and they began to practice.

In her own time, she rehearsed her lines again and again, trying to get rid of her heavy accent with the help of her tutor and guard. Again and again, she went at it. Whenever she made a mistake, she didn't stop. No, she went on, finished that run through, then did it again. Did it all over again until she was satisfied, until she was sure Lee Sooman would be satisfied.

She loved music, she loved dancing, but she was not naïve, she knew, she very well knew, that though Lee Sooman was supportive of her, and had told her that win or lose, it was okay. Maybe America wasn't ready for her yet, and that was alright. What matters is that she tried, and she tried her best. But she didn't want that. She knew that if she set her goals too high, she might destroy herself. She knew that if she did so, she would disappoint herself, but she just couldn't settle. There was a reason why Lee Sooman put so much trust in her that she was the one chosen to pioneer SM's expansion, and though she was unclear why, she wanted to meet that wish.

Soon, she was practicing to the minus ones, and the choreographers were stunned. They hadn't heard the recorded version just yet, but her live performance was amazing, even without the fancy costumes and make-up. Boa had it, and they all knew this. And they hoped for all the best.

"Dean," Boa called when she ran into him one day. She was ready now to face what she did, and she wanted to make it up to him. Her re-found confidence was a new change for Dean who hadn't seen her again until this time, and he seemed amazed by it. She seemed different.

Little did he know, despite the courageous front she had put up in front of him, her insides were churning. It was like she had a storm going on inside her, making her fearful. She was afraid, but she knew she had to. Fear was an obstacle. It had to be overcome. Just like that fear she had whenever she was to step in front of the audience, no matter how large or where, she had to overcome it. Nothing happens when you allow fear to grip you so tightly that it almost paralyses you, but when you learn to go around it, or break it down, you realize... It was only an illusion.

Fear is a feeling linked to the unknown. We fear what we do not know, but when we find out the truth, we learn that our fears are petty and simple. They weren't even real to begin with!

"Dean, I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that. I really shouldn't have done that. I know. Now, I know. It was a stupid mistake, but I did it because I wanted to get closer to you. I wanted us to be friends, not strangers. If, at the least, we could be colleagues that acknowledge each other and work together, then that's good enough for me as well. I hope you can forgive me, and I hope you'd be willing to finish the album with me," she blurted.

She held her breath, fearful of his reply as he pondered her words.

"Well, Boa, I was offended," he said. "But I guess since you're sorry, I can overlook that. And...yeah, sure, why not? Let's give it one more shot before we completely move past that part of our lives."

"Great!"

"But one thing."

Boa gulped nervously. Was he going to ask her to do something in return? Was he going to say it was a joke?

"Since when did your English get so good? I swear, you're practically a native speaker now!" he exclaimed.

"I got a lot of time to practice recently," she smiled sheepishly.

"I'll talk to your manager and see if we can arrange," he told her.

Boa slept fitfully that night. She had fixed her relationship with Dean that day, but for some reason, there was something in his eyes that said that ‘there’s something wrong with me’. She could see it, feel it. He was there, but at the same time, he wasn’t there. He had forgiven her a little too easily, and when he had reacted to her snooping, he seemed to be pretty mad. It seemed to be something important and precious to him.

She felt horrible for causing such pain to Dean, she felt annoyed at herself, and she felt disappointed. She was disappointed in herself. She was an adult! How could she have done such a childish thing?

 She picked up her phone and scrolled through the contacts.

To call or not to call? she wondered. She spent quite some time mulling over that thought, and in the end, she decided not to. That person was in Japan at the moment, and would either be busy or be enjoying sleep. Who was she to take that away?

Dean woke up and got dressed and ready for the day. Yesterday was such an odd day that he could not believe his ears, nor his memory. He felt like it was a dream, a dream and a nightmare at the same time, but it wasn't. On his bedside table was the revised schedule of things, given to him by Boa's manager.

He had left over feelings of Boa's intrusion on his privacy, but he knew he could not allow himself to stoop down and retaliate--that would be childish!--so he would just go with it and see if it works well this time around.

**********

Hi, all. Sorry if it's been so long since the last update. I hope you understand. Half of the manpower working on this story is bogged down by schoolwork. xD (This half, xinli's half) It's uni, so I can't exactly go prancing around not caring about it. lol Though I do hope you enjoy this. :) -xinli