Misunderstandings

Description

Short story about misunderstandings between Leader G-Dragon and his Hyung T.O.P. Their love is for each other is put out in the open but still have trouble getting it through their thick skulls till Mr. Cupid (Daesung) comes along a literly pushes them together. :)

Foreword

I really hope I get more veiws thatn my 1st fic since that was a complete FLOP :'(

I decided to make this sort of short and no real ending aso if later on how ever reads this wants me to continue,. (I will do so)

Please comment even if it's comments like "I didn't like it, it's boring, no real action, you didn't really make the characters like how they really are."

Just comment when ever you can.

p.s (I don't own the pikz on here)

Author's Thoughts
KpopMika93
Please comment!!
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Comments

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DoloresJung #1
Chapter 1: OH MY GAWD!! I think I fell in love with Korean . >////<
MORE MORE MORE!! Give me more. >///< XDD
<33 I really liked it. ;; u ;;
AsterXemil #2
Ok...first thing's first, there were quite a few spelling and grammatical errors. I point this out because readers can't understand what they are reading, or get stuck trying to figure out how the sentence is supposed to be/what it actually means, so they are important to make sure are correct.

Secondly, there is a lack of detail in the story leading up to the finale of passion between the characters of GD and TOP. For example this sentence:
"He turns and faces their dorms hallway that leads into the rest of the house and lets a once locked up tear finally fall down his redden cheek"

-To add more description, and take out not quite so necessary script here's a modified example:
"Swiftly turning, he stares down the hallway as a fragment of his sadness cascades from shining eyes down his ruby cheeks."

Lastly, at the beginning of the story the time/place needs to be explained so that you can place a hook to draw the reader in. Dialogue is OK to introduce first, but the setting needs to be in place as well.

My opinion: You are an imaginative writer, whose skills may need a bit of tweaking, but the story comes not only from the heart, but from your mind! You've taken something you like, and added a little bit of a personal twist. Not very many have the potential I see in your work, keep it up and write the crap out of your next story
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