It was another chilly morning.

And for Yoon Doojoon, it was just like any other Thursday morning.

He was up and ready for the day by 6:00AM. Dressed in his luxurious pin-striped suit and black leather-bound dress shoes, Doojoon exited his grand apartment. A level down from his, he graciously held the elevator door open for Mrs. Kim, a widowed millionaire. She inherited quite a sum of money when her husband died and was not at all hesitant to receive it. Doojoon gave her one of his breathtaking smiles as she entered the elevator. She returned his smile with a seductive one of her own.

“Mr. Yoon, have you been well?” Mrs. Kim asked just as the elevator doors closed.

“Quite well. And yourself?” Doojoon answered, a small smile still on his lips.

“Extraordinary. Going away for the weekend with some friends of mine to the hot springs. Should be entertaining. Who wouldn’t enjoy a weekend full of hot steam, margaritas, and morning hangovers?” Mrs. Kim let out a small chuckle.

Mrs. Kim was always more on the wild side. Even when her husband was still alive, she was often found at bars having too many drinks. Despite her daring side, Mrs. Kim was also very poised when she wanted and needed to be. She was an elegant woman, very beautiful despite her age and the prize to be won in the hearts of many men. But Mrs. Kim wasn't one to settle; she loved the attention too much.

“It would definitely be more eventful if you came and joined us, Mr. Yoon.” Mrs. Kim said, turning to him and giving him a radiant smile.

“The offer is tempting...I'll have to check my schedule for this weekend first though. I may be busy at the company.” Doojoon said as the doors opened to the lobby.

“Well, if you find yourself free this weekend, then let me know.” Mrs. Kim said, throwing him a quick wink before exiting the elevator ahead of him.

Doojoon couldn't help but smile at her retreating back. This wasn't the first time Mrs. Kim had tried to lure him to one of her gatherings. And every time, Doojoon had refused. He wasn't the type to go out just for “fun.” He enjoyed working and keeping himself busy more than anything. The only time you'd see Doojoon out was at business parties, where he never stayed too long either. You'd think that the CEO of Cube Motors would enjoy such outings.

It was a family business. As the Yoon's only son, it was no surprise that Doojoon came to have such an inheritance. Senior Yoon, Doojoon's father, still held a very high position when it came to the business. But because of his old age and dwindling health, Doojoon was named as CEO, closely monitored by his father. Doojoon was only 20 when his father gave him the position. It was difficult when he first started, but now, three years later, he felt he was used to it all. And with his father's guidance, it was all the easier.

“Have a nice day, Mr. Yoon.” the bellman said as Doojoon walked out the front door. Doojoon gave him a nod before proceeding out the door.

“Good morning, Young Master Yoon.”

Doojoon was greeted by a man in a plain black suit. He bowed to Doojoon as Doojoon gave him a friendly smile.

“How many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me 'Young Master Yoon', Secretary Park?” Doojoon said.

Secretary Park Dohyun. He was, undoubtedly, Doojoon's best friend. There since the time Doojoon was a kid, Secretary Park was somewhat of a bodyguard. Doojoon used to hate his presence, but grew extremely fond of him. When his father was away for long periods of time on business trips, Secretary Park would be sort of a father figure for him. He was always at the sidelines of Doojoon's soccer games throughout school, cheering him on...always caring for him whenever he fell sick...always standing ready with seaweed soup and a gift or two for his birthdays. Secretary Park, now in his late 40's, was like Doojoon's second father.

“My apologies, Young Master Yoon. It’s become a bad habit.” Secretary Park said, bowing once again. Doojoon let out a soft chuckle.

Secretary Park opened the door to the black car parked in front of them for Doojoon. He gave him a nod before entering the car, Secretary Park closing the door behind him and hurrying to the driver’s side.

“Any news for me this morning, Secretary Park?” Doojoon asked as they started down the road.

“The deal with Japan is nearly done. Senior Yoon wishes to have a private meeting with you this morning before you go and meet with the Japanese later this morning.” Secretary Park said. Doojoon nodded, turning to look out the window.

And that’s when he saw her.

She was dressed in ruined jeans and a black peacoat with a matching black beret on her head. She was graciously making her way down the street in her black high heeled boots, going the way they had come. Doojoon wasn’t quite sure what it was…but he was mesmerized by her. It seemed as if her face were giving off a pearly white glow, something that only angels were capable of. Her lips had a cherry tint to them, standing out on her pale face. She was smiling as she walked, taking in her surroundings as if it were the first time she was seeing them.

Their paths were crossing; she was now right on the other side of his window. All this time, his eyes hadn’t left her. As if sensing his eyes on her, she turned and faced him. Their eyes locked and time seemed to have stopped. Doojoon’s heart was racing, pounding against his chest as he looked into her eyes. He was falling…falling deep into those round brown eyes of hers. The time that elapsed between them was only seconds but it seemed much longer to Doojoon. Right as she was about to disappear from the car window’s view, she shot Doojoon a brilliant smile, her whole face lighting up. And her smile made him smile. But she didn’t get the chance to see him return her smile; the car drove passed her and she continued down the street in the opposite direction.

Doojoon faced forward, his eyes staring at nothing in particular. This mysterious girl’s smiling face was swimming in his mind and he couldn’t think of anything else. Doojoon found this whole situation strange. He was never in his life ever so captivated by a woman before. He had met many beautiful women at those business parties but none of them had really attracted him...none of them really caught his attention. But this girl…this seemingly average girl walking down the street made him lose his breath.

“Are you alright, Young Master Yoon?” Secretary Park asked, staring curiously at him from the rearview mirror.

Doojoon gave him a small smile. “Yes, I’m fine.”

---------------------

Doojoon was walking down the hall toward his father’s office, Secretary Park in step beside him. He was still thinking about that girl, his mind muddled by what exactly it was about her that made her so alluring. He didn’t hear one of the workers greet him and didn’t stop until Secretary Park held onto his shoulder. Doojoon turned to the people standing to the side of them. Both of the ladies there bowed to him. One he recognized as Choi Sunmi, Cube Motors’ Marketing Manager but the other he didn’t know.

“You must have a lot on your mind, Mr. Yoon, what with the big deal with Japan almost set. This here is Lee Jihee. She’ll be your new desk secretary at your office.” Sunmi said. Jihee bowed once again to him.

“Thank you for giving me this opportunity, Mr. Yoon. I promise I won’t disappoint you.” Jihee said, straightening up and giving him a shy smile. Doojoon smiled in return.

“Welcome to the team, Miss Jihee.” He said before continuing down the hall.

Sunmi and Jihee watched him as he went.

“As expected…” Sunmi muttered. Jihee turned to her.

“What do you mean? Is Mr. Yoon always like that?” Jihee asked.

“Mr. Yoon has always been kindhearted, if that’s what you’re asking. But no, he’s not always so absentminded. He cares a lot for this company and does his best to keep all of his employees happy. A fine man, Mr. Yoon is. Quite handsome as well.” Sunmi said, smiling.

“What did you mean when you said ‘as expected’?” Jihee asked.

“What day is it, Jihee?” Sunmi asked.

Bewildered as to why Sunmi was springing this random question on her, Jihee answered, “Thursday December 16th.”

Sunmi turned around and started down the hall. Jihee followed after her, curiosity b within her.

“I’ll explain on the way to back to your desk.”

---------------------

“Thank you, sir. It’s such an honor to have you working with us now. We will make sure you’re well taken care of when it comes to our vehicles.” Doojoon said, shaking hands with his new Japanese business partner.

Doojoon exited the restaurant where he had sealed the deal with their friends from Japan, Secretary Park a step behind him. They climbed into the car and drove off back to the company building. In his office, Doojoon couldn’t focus. Whenever he’d think his mind was off this mysterious girl, her face would immediately flood back into his mind. It was like she was some drug he was now obsessed with. He couldn’t get enough of her, even if he had only just seen her.

Being trapped in this office wasn’t helping. He needed some air.

“Miss Jihee, I’m going out for lunch today. If anyone calls for me, take a message and I’ll call them back as soon as I get back.” Doojoon said, closing his office door behind him. Jihee nodded in understanding.

“Did you need to go somewhere, Young Master Yoon?” Secretary Park asked, appearing at his side.

“Just going out for lunch today, Secretary Park. I’ll be back in an hour or two.” Doojoon said.

“But I packed you lunch today. Why don’t you just eat that for lunch?” Secretary Park said.

“I don’t feel like eating homemade food today.” Doojoon replied.

“Well, what would you like to eat then, Young Master Yoon? I can take you.” Secretary Park said. But Doojoon shook his head.

“I’ll just take the bus. I need some fresh air…and alone time.” He said, giving Secretary Park a reassuring smile. When he didn’t say anything, Doojoon turned and continued down the hall toward the elevator.

Jihee watched Mr. Yoon go, a look of sadness in her eyes. One of the things she had to remember about Mr. Yoon: he never left the building during working hours for anything other than business, not even when he’s feeling unwell. Today was the only exception.

---------------------

Doojoon chose a seat in the back of the bus and gently leaned his head against the window as the bus started forward. He was beginning to feel a slight headache coming to him. He let out a soft groan. Having a headache while this mysterious girl was constantly on his mind was not a good thing. But upon thinking of her, his lips curved into a smile. It was strange…but he could remember everything about her; the way her eyes twinkled as she marveled at her surroundings, how graceful she walked, as if she were gliding…

Before long, Doojoon had dozed off on the bus, his mind still lingering on this girl. But a sudden jerk forward from the bus brought him out of his sleep. Doojoon straightened up in his seat, taking a look around him. At first, he couldn’t recognize the place. They definitely weren’t in Seoul anymore. But after passing a familiar looking gas station, he knew exactly where he was.

It was the town he had grown up in…a small place just outside the city of Seoul. His mother loved the countryside so his father had a house built here in this town and the three of them lived there for a good majority of his life. But the feeling of home that Doojoon had felt there disappeared when his mother passed away. He was only 12. His father still lived here, unwilling to leave the place, but Doojoon had moved out a few years ago. Something about being in that house was unsettling for him.

Doojoon had momentarily forgotten about the mysterious girl as he thought back to his mother when she suddenly came rushing back…and not as a form of his imagination.

There she was, jogging down the sidewalk in sweatpants, a matching hoodie, and tennis shoes, her long hair in a high pony tail. To anyone, she’d look like your average, every day girl. But to Doojoon, even in her running attire, she looked beautiful. She was jogging pass the bus now and Doojoon knew what he wanted to do. He pulled the line so the bus would stop and hurriedly exited the bus.

He had lost her. For a moment, he felt panic rise inside of him. Was he just being silly? What was going on with him? How is it that Yoon Doojoon, the hard-to-please businessman, was so caught up with this girl he knew nothing about? Feeling a bit idiotic, he was just about to turn around and catch the next bus home when he spotted her. And his heart leapt at the sight of her. She was jogging a little ways away on a trail that led into a nearly deserted park. Before he knew it, he was following her into the park, his pace quick.

She stopped at a park bench to catch her breath and Doojoon took the chance. He sat down at the other end of the bench, his eyes wandering about the park. Out of the corner of his eye, however, he saw her turn to look at him.

“Beautiful day out.” Doojoon said, still keeping his eyes away from her.

It was cold out, no doubt. But at least the sun was shining. Now that he was looking around the park, Doojon realized that he knew this park. It wasn’t too far from his home. He used to practice soccer here with his friends when he was young.

“Yes, it is. Now, tell me, why have you been following me?” Her voice was like a sweet melody to his ears. And because he was so entranced by her voice, it took him a couple seconds to process what she had actually said to him. He straightened up a little in his seat and turned to look at her. His heart melted when his eyes met her questioning ones. Although her look accused him of something he wasn’t, he couldn’t deny that he loved the look she was giving him.

“I’m not what you think I am, I swear. I just happen to be going the same way you are.” He knew his answer wasn’t really convincing…and she knew it too. She rose an eyebrow at him, quickly glancing at his attire. Understanding seemed to cross her mind and she nodded her head a little.

“I see you’re a businessman. Scoping out the area for a new business, eh? We get those a lot here.” She said. She stood up and placed her foot on the bench, reaching down to retie her shoelaces.

Doojoon decided to play along with her scenario.

“Was I that obvious?” he asked. She let out a soft chuckle and his heart skipped another beat.

“In that nice suit? Oh yeah…very obvious.” She said, switching her foot to retie the laces on her other shoe.

Doojoon could sense that their meeting might end early and he didn’t want it to. He hadn’t even gotten her name yet.

“I’m guessing that you live here. If you have time, do you think you can show me around? It’ll be easier to look around if I have someone who can guide me.” Doojoon said, rising from the bench just as she finished tying her laces. She narrowed her eyes on him.

“I will take into consideration every word you have to say to me about where I should and shouldn’t build. It’s kind of like aiding me in a business deal.” He said. She stared at him suspiciously for another few seconds.

“Well, that’s easy. If it were up to me, then I’d say go find another place to build and leave us alone.” She answered wittily back. She turned her back on him and was about to jog off.

In a desperate attempt to have more time with her, he said the first thing that came to his mind, “Please?” He was amazed that that had stopped her. She turned back to face him and he was relieved to see that she was smiling.

“Saying the magic word always helps.” She stretched out her hand for him to shake.

“Han Minhee. Pleasure to meet you.”

Doojoon smiled and shook her hand, a tingling sensation riding up his arm as he did so.

“Yoon Doojoon.”

---------------------

“So, how long have you been living here, Minhee-shi?” Doojoon asked as they started down the path.

“I’ve been here all my life.” She answered, a small smile on her lips.

Strange…he doesn’t remember her at all…and he’s been here for almost all of his life as well. He was sure he would’ve remembered meeting her…or even seeing her, if she had lived here. But he’s never met a girl named Han Minhee before…he’s never set eyes on anyone as beautiful as her.

They came to the end of the path, chatting the whole way. Doojoon thought it felt nice. She didn’t make him nervous or uncomfortable at all, unlike how he thought she would. She was very easy-going…very easy to talk to. They continued down the street for a couple of blocks before Doojoon stopped in his tracks. There, in front of him, was his old high school. The grounds were deserted. The students were probably all in class right now. But as Doojoon stared into the school gates, memories from his past came flooding into his mind.

He was the typical jock in high school. An excellent soccer player, good-looking, and was from a well-off family. Everyone wanted to be Yoon Doojoon back in the days. It’s strange how Doojoon now had no friends when in his younger years, he had too many to count. Of course, he tried to view each of his employees as friends but close friends, he didn’t have. That made him wonder what his old high school friends were up to now. He made a mental note to see if he could find them all again and catch up with them.

“The high school is a no-go. This thing right here’s all that this town has. Tear this down and you’re tearing families apart.” Minhee said, looking up at the school too.

“So you attended this school too?” Doojoon asked, turning to face her. She nodded.

“Come on…there’s more to see.” She said, starting down the street. Doojoon went after her, his steps a little behind hers.

Doojoon didn’t get it. Was she lying to him? Because if she had attended this school, then she MUST know him. There was hardly anyone who attended the school who didn’t know him. And judging by her looks, she had to be around Doojoon’s age, possibly a year younger. And if she did attend this school, why hadn’t Doojoon ever seen her before?

He almost ran into her but stopped right on time. He hadn’t noticed that she had stopped walking, her eyes lingering down a lonesome street not far from the high school. Doojoon peered down the street as well. It was unfamiliar to him. He remembered passing by it…since his house was on the other side of this street, but he’s never walked down it before. The guys he used to hang out with said that all the “loonies” lived down that street so Doojoon avoided it.

“I changed my mind. If you want to knock down anything in this town that no one would miss, this would be it.” Minhee said motioning to the street. Doojoon noticed the change in her voice. There was a hint of anger in it.

But before Doojoon could say anything, Minhee was already walking pass the street, not turning back to look. Doojoon obediently followed after her. She was taking them up the street toward his house…his old house. When he saw it, his heart gave a slight leap of joy. It’s been years since he last seen it. Yet it still looked exactly the same as he remembered. Just looking at the house, you wouldn’t be able to tell that a rich family lived there. It looked very average; that’s how his mother had wanted it to look. Doojoon could see that his father hadn’t taken down the tire swing and his heart swelled. He loved that tire swing, which Secretary Park had tied to a branch on the large tree in their front yard himself.

“Beautiful house, isn’t it?”

Doojoon turned to look at her. Minhee was gazing up at the house almost as lovingly as he had been just moments ago. There was a sweet smile on her lips as she looked. But, like before, she had turned and continued on before Doojoon could say anything.

This was getting stranger by the minute. She even recognized his house, yet she didn’t recognize him? How is that possible? The headache he had felt coming on the bus was slowly taking over again. He gently rubbed his temple, following after Minhee.

They walked by the small mall where the one arcade in town was located. In his grade school years, that was his favorite place to be. They passed a jjajangmyun restaurant that Doojoon loved to eat at. He had forgotten that he hadn’t had lunch yet. But for some reason, he wasn’t at all hungry. Minhee chatted happily with him as they went, giving him history about the town that he already knew. And that rose even more questions in his head. She couldn’t possibly be lying about living here…she knows too much about this place. But how was it possible that this was the first time he was seeing and talking to her?

Before he knew it, the sun had already set and the pair of them had made an entire circle around the town. Doojoon could see the park they had started at nearing, even through the darkening sky. He glanced over at Minhee. She was slowly walking beside him, her hands in her pockets, staring straight ahead of her with a smile on her face. He didn’t want this to end…he had enjoyed her company so much. He had decided to ask her to go to dinner with him when she stopped, turning to him.

“Well, that’s all there is to see here. Hopefully you’ll make the right decision.” She said. She gave him a short bow and was about to walk off when he stopped her.

“Wait. Do you want to go out for dinner with me? My treat.” He said, casting her a smile.

“I can’t. I have to go.” She said and Doojoon noticed that she wasn’t using the same tone of voice she had been using the whole day.

“Do you need to be somewhere? I can take you there.” He said.

“No. I have to go alone. You can’t come with me.” Minhee said in a tone that worried Doojoon even more. She turned away so she wasn’t facing him anymore.

“Where is this place that you need to go to?” He asked curiously.

“Away.” She said simply.

Minhee turned back to look at him and Doojoon was surprised to see that her eyes were full of tears. She took a step toward him and reached up to touch his face, gently placing her hand on his cheek. He closed his eyes at her touch, loving how very right it felt. But when he opened his eyes, her tear stained face filled them and he was full of worry again.

“What’s wrong, Minhee?” he asked.

There was a long pause.

Then she said, “I’m sorry, Doojoon.”

It was the first time she had said his name…and it felt so nice to hear her say it. But the voice she had said it in was full of sorrow. He couldn’t understand why she was saying this to him. His head started throbbing, his headache was worsening.

Before he could say anything in response, she had taken off across the street. He watched wide-eyed as she ran out, heard himself yell out her name, saw the headlights of the car speeding by. It hit her and drove off. Doojoon couldn’t believe what was happening…there was no way…

But there she was, lying sprawled out on the road, blood seeping out from underneath her body. He ran out to her, frantic.

“Minhee! Oh God, Minhee! Why did you do that?! Huh?! Oh God…someone! Help! Call an ambulance! Please!!” Doojoon was yelling as he cradled her bloody body in his arms, tears streaming down his face.

“I’m…sorry…Doojoon. I…I…I love…you.” She whispered.

Doojoon cried even harder and held her tighter. There was a flash of more headlights right as the headache in Doojoon’s head heightened to its peak. He heard a familiar voice call out to him just as the pain took over him and he was plunged into a world of darkness.

---------------------

Doojoon’s eyes flickered feebly open. A bright light was shining onto him and it took him a while to get his eyes fully open.

“Young Master Yoon.”

Doojoon looked over and saw Secretary Park sitting in a chair beside the bed he was lying on. He took a look around. He was lying in a hospital bed and the sun was shining brightly outside his window. He tried to get up into a sitting position but as he did so, a sharp pain struck his head and he sunk back into his bed, reaching up to rub his temples to ease the pain.

“Why am I here, Secretary Park?” he asked. But as soon as the words left his mouth, he remembered all too clearly what had taken place the night before. Ignoring the pain that shot up again, he sat straight up, his eyes wide with worry.

“Minhee! Where is she?! Is she okay?!” Doojoon asked in a fairly loud voice, his eyes imploring Secretary Park to answer. And when he didn’t automatically say anything, Doojoon pulled the covers off of himself and proceeded to get out of the bed. But Secretary Park stopped him, holding firmly onto his arm.

“Calm down, Young Master Yoon. It’s best that you rest for now.” Secretary Park said, pulling a little on Doojoon’s arm so he’d lie back down.

“No. I need to see how Minhee is first. Then I’ll rest.” Doojoon said, pulling his arm out of Secretary Park’s hold.

As Doojoon freed his arm, however, the door to his room opened. Doojoon looked up, half-hoping that it was Minhee walking through the door to see him. But instead, he was met with a face that he’d never seen before. The man was probably around his late-thirties. He was dressed in plain black slacks and a navy blue dress shirt with a black tie. He wore a smile on his face as he made his way toward Doojoon.

“Hello Mr. Yoon. Long time no see.” The man said. Doojoon stared at him curiously.

“Do I know you?”

“Yes…and no. Please, lie back down as I explain. The information may be a bit overwhelming so it’s best that you be as relaxed as possible.” The man said.

Doojoon thought about it for a minute. He wanted to go see if Minhee was okay but for some reason, he wanted to hear what this man had to say too. So he slowly leaned back against his pillow in a sitting position on his bed. The man came over and Secretary Park got up out of his seat so he could sit down.

“How are you feeling?” the man asked.

“Who are you?” Doojoon asked, not bothering to answer the man’s question.

“I see you want to get straight to the point then. I always prefer to slowly lead up to it. But, since I know your stubbornness, I guess I have no choice.” The man said. Doojoon rose an eyebrow at him as the man took a deep breath.

“Mr. Yoon, I’m Jang Jaehyuk…and I’m your psychiatrist.”

Doojoon stared at him through narrowed eyes.

“I don’t have nor do I need a psychiatrist. You must be mistaken.” he said.

“No, I’m not. I’ve been your psychiatrist and you’ve been my patient for the past four years.” Mr. Jang said.

Doojoon couldn’t believe what this guy was saying. Was he pulling some sort of prank on him? Because this wasn’t the time to be joking.

“I’ve never been to a psychiatrist in my life.” Doojoon said adamantly.

“Not entirely true. It is true that you don’t see me a lot. Only one day out of the year, as a matter of fact. December 17th of every year for the past four years.” Mr. Jang said. Doojoon had to push back the scoff that was threatening to escape from his mouth.

“Secretary Park, are you going to allow this crazy man to continue to speak to me about such nonsense?” Doojoon asked, turning his attention to Secretary Park, who was unusually quiet. When he met his eyes, however, they spoke something entirely different from what Doojoon was feeling.

“Young Master Yoon, please…just listen to what Mr. Jang has to say.” Secretary Park said. Doojoon couldn’t believe it. Was Secretary Park in on the prank as well?

“Mr. Yoon, have you ever heard of the term ‘repression’?” Mr. Jang asked. Doojoon turned back to him. He’d heard of it, but at that moment he couldn’t remember what it meant.

As if reading his mind, Mr. Jang continued, “Repression is the unconscious hiding of uncomfortable thoughts. It’s a process that many people go through in order to hide or forget something in their lives that they do not wish to remember. This happens most commonly when something traumatic happens in one’s life…something that puts them beyond mental repair.”

“And what does that have anything to do with me?” Doojoon asked, curiosity rising inside of him. He was beginning to think that maybe this wasn’t a joke…

“Do you remember what happened five years ago? The traumatic event that took place in your life that you want so desperately to forget?” Mr. Jang asked. Doojoon’s head was beginning to throb painfully again.

“Are you trying to say that I’ve been living with repressed memories of past events?” Doojoon asked, rubbing his temples.

“Not events, Mr. Yoon. Just one event. Do you remember what that was?” Mr. Jang said. Instead of answering, Doojoon slowly shook his head.

There was a pause as Doojoon continued to rub his temples, gently closing his eyes as he did so to ease the pain.

“Mr. Yoon, do you know a Miss Han Minhee?”

At her name, his eyes flew open and he stopped rubbing his temples, despite the pain still being present.

“What about her?”

“When did you meet Han Minhee?” Mr. Jang asked carefully.

“Yesterday. What does Minhee have to do with any of this?” Doojoon asked.

“Han Minhee has everything to do with this, Mr. Yoon. Because…you met her 10 years ago, when you were 13.”

Doojoon went silent as he processed what Mr. Jang had just said. He shook his head.

“No…I met her for the first time yesterday. I don’t know what you’re playing at, Mr. Jang, but if you’ll excuse me, I have to see if Minhee’s okay.” Doojoon said, about to rise from his bed again.

But Mr. Jang’s next words made him freeze.

“Mr. Yoon, Han Minhee…is dead.”

Doojoon slumped back down onto his bed, distraught. He should’ve known…should’ve guessed it. There was so much blood last night…so much…but he didn’t want to believe it…that’s why he kept wanting to go see her…he wanted to have hope that she had made it…

“She’s been dead for five years now.”

Doojoon looked up at Mr. Jang. He must really be pulling a prank on him now…how could that be possible? When just yesterday, Doojoon was walking and talking with her…when just yesterday, they took a tour of Doojoon’s hometown…when just yesterday, he held her in his arms as he cried out for help?...

“Everything you saw of her yesterday was all in your head.” Mr. Jang said.

“You’re crazy, Mr. Jang…completely insane.” Doojoon muttered.

Mr. Jang sighed. “This is the part I hate the most in our sessions, but it has to be done.”

And then, he started his story.

“Your mother passed away in an untimely and unexpected plane crash when you were 12. After her death, you went into a state of depression, shutting out your friends and your father. The only person you went to was Secretary Park. But after a year of his constant nagging for you to get out of your depression, you got fed up with even him. You ran out one night after his talk with you and bumped into a young girl in the park.”

In his mind, Doojoon saw it happening…like an old film that’s been waiting to be played. And he closed his eyes so he could better understand it.

“She had been crying because her parents were fighting again. And you reached out and comforted her. After she had had her full of tears, she introduced herself as Han Minhee to you. And from that point on, you two were inseparable.”

Doojoon saw the young him…and the young Minhee sitting together at that bench…the very same bench he had sat on with her yesterday. He saw himself awkwardly comforting her, saw her calm down her sobs, saw them shake hands in greeting with smiles on their faces.

“Minhee helped you out of your depression. She helped you get yourself back up, in school and in life. And that created something special between the two of you…a bond that no one could break.”

He saw them hanging out in that old arcade with the rest of his friends, who she had helped him gain back. He saw her cheering him on at his first soccer match. He saw them laughing loudly in the library at a joke and getting scolded by the librarian. He saw them walking down the street together, her arm hooked in his as they chatted happily together.

“Minhee’s situation at home wasn’t the best though. After countless arguments between her parents, her mother finally decided she had had enough. She packed her bags and left. After her mother left, her father became an alcoholic and started beating her to release his anger. The first time you saw her bruised face, you almost went and murdered her father.”

He saw Minhee shamefully raising her head for him to see. She had a large bruise under her puffy eye and a cut across her cheek. Doojoon felt himself get angry and had started marching off toward her house. But Minhee held him back, begging him not to do anything.

“But you found a way to help her. Minhee’s father was sent to prison for abuse and Minhee was free to live her life without fear. You were a shining light in her darkened world and that created an even stronger bond between the two of you.”

He saw himself pushing Minhee on the tire swing as she laughed…saw Secretary Park calling the two of them in for dinner.

“You were 16 and a half when you finally asked her to be your girlfriend. And you did it in the most romantic way, bringing her back to the place where you had first met each other.”

They were back in the park. He was kneeling in front of her, as if asking for her hand in marriage. She laughed at his action but readily nodded her approval. She jumped into his arms and he spun her around as fireworks went off behind them.

“You dated for nearly two years before you decided it was time to tell your father. Although he approved of your friendship, he wouldn’t allow someone of her background to become a part of his family.”

He saw the hurt in Minhee’s eyes as his father bluntly told him that Minhee wasn’t what he was looking for in a daughter-in-law. He saw her run out of the house in tears…saw himself running after her.

“A couple of days later, you took Minhee on a drive, sure that she was over what your father had said. But on that drive, she told you she wanted to break up. She told you that the two of you wouldn’t work out…and it was best to end things as soon as possible.”

He saw them arguing in the car.

“It was a cold winter night out…the roads were icy from the snow that had fallen during the day…”

He saw it happen. A bright flash of headlights, a long and carried out horn, the screeching of tires on a road that wouldn’t hold a car…the car he had lost control of…

“It was me…it was my fault. I killed her.”

Doojoon said it in a voice barely above a whisper as he slowly opened his eyes.

“It’s not your fault, Mr. Yoon. The other driver was drunk. He was the one who caused the accident, not you. You were trying to save the both of you from him but the roads were slippery.” Mr. Jang said firmly.

But Doojoon was shaking his head slowly from side to side, his eyes downcast.

“…no…it was my fault…all my fault.” He was muttering.

“It wasn’t your fault-”

“Then why is it that I’m alive while she’s…she’s dead.”

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“He’ll be fine, Secretary Park. He needs rest.” Mr. Jang said as Secretary Park closed Doojoon’s hospital door behind him. Doojoon had fainted shortly after his outburst. He was now sleeping soundly on his bed.

“I wonder, Mr. Jang…if there’s any way to do this without it hurting him so much…” Secretary Park said as the two of them started down the hallway.

“As I’ve told you before, Secretary Park, there is no other way for Mr. Yoon. He lives in his state of repression, forgetting the memory of her completely, for all the days of the year except for these two days…the day of her death and the day after her death. He wants to erase her completely but when this time of the year comes, he’s forced to remember her. His mind…no, more his heart, refuses to let her go. But because he’s in repression for so long, he won’t believe it until we tell him his story. It’s the only way to break him out of the fantasy world he role plays on the day of her death. If we don’t, he may end up being permanently insane.” Mr. Jang explained.

“Then is there a way to stop all this from happening every year? Have you found a way yet?” Secretary Park asked.

Mr. Jang looked grave. “I’m afraid the only way he’ll be able to stop this habit…is when he’s able to truly forgive himself for what happened to Minhee. He goes through her death on the day of her death every year…then goes through guilt and remorse the next day. It’s like a cycle for him. Because that’s how it happened the first time, it’ll continually happen the same way. But I think…that if on this second day, he’s able to forgive himself of what happened that day, then maybe this will stop. Maybe he’ll live on remembering her and loving the memory of her for the rest of his life.”

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“Ahjusshi, how did you know that this was where I wanted to be?”

Doojoon and Secretary Park sat in the car in the parking lot of the park…their park. They had been sitting there for nearly two hours before Doojoon spoke.

He let out a heavy and forced chuckle.

“Of course you know…I probably want to come here every year on this day, huh?”

Secretary Park remained silent.

“Ahjusshi…do I really go through this every year since her death? I meet an imaginary Minhee and lose her the same way every year? Does everyone know this? Everyone at the company? Father? Answer me, ahjusshi.” Doojoon said. He wasn’t demanding it…he was pleading.

“Yes…you do. Everyone at the company knows. We don’t schedule anything for you these two days. The deal with Japan was already dealt with separately by your father the day before. We pretended to have that in your schedule this time though to see if maybe…we thought that maybe if you were busy…you wouldn’t have time to…” Secretary Park’s voice cut off and he couldn’t continue. And Doojoon didn’t need him to finish. He understood.

“I’m pitiful, aren’t I, ahjusshi?”

“I watched the two of you grow up together…and fall in love with each other. She completed you and you her. You’ve never been happier than in those moments when you were with her. Doojoon-ah, love isn’t pitiful. It’s beautiful in every way.”

Secretary Park watched from his rearview mirror as silent tears cascaded down Doojoon’s face and his heart broke. He couldn’t bear to see this boy whom he’s come to love as his own son go through this pain.

After a long pause, Doojoon was able to find his voice again.

“What pains me the most…is…Minhee should be remembered and loved by me every day, not just these two days. She deserves to be. But tomorrow…she’ll be gone.” His voice cracked at the end.

“She doesn’t have to be. You have to forgive yourself, Doojoon-ah. Forgive yourself of what happened to Minhee. That’s the only way you’ll be able to remember and love her, even if it’s just the memory of her.” Secretary Park said reassuringly.

Doojoon stared out of the window at their bench, tears still rolling down his cheeks.

The two of them sat there the whole day…sat there until Doojoon had no more tears to shed. When he was soundlessly sleeping in the back seat, Secretary Park drove him home.

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Doojoon awoke with a start to the sound of his alarm clock blaring in his ears. Taking a quick look at the time, 5:30AM, he groaned, lying his head back down on his pillow. His head was throbbing like crazy. He needed Aspirin…pronto.

Doojoon got up from his bed and lazily made his way to the kitchen. But as he neared the kitchen, he heard the scrapings of pans that hinted that he wasn’t alone in this luxurious apartment. He poked his head in and a smile spread on his face.

“Secretary Park, what are you doing here so early in the morning?” he said, making his way into the kitchen as Secretary Park stirred a pot of porridge.

He looked up at Doojoon curiously.

“How are you feeling?” he asked. Doojoon, who hadn’t noticed the way Secretary Park had looked at him, groaned.

“Not so well. I have a massive headache. And for some reason, it feels like I’ve been asleep for days. What day is it, Secretary Park?” Doojoon asked, pulling a pitcher of water out from the fridge and pouring himself a glass.

“It’s Saturday, December 18th, Young Master Yoon.” Secretary Park answered, his eyes lowered.

“Really? Saturday already? Feels like yesterday was just Wednesday!” Doojoon let out a laugh before popping an Aspirin into his mouth and gulping it down with some water.

“And Secretary Park, how many times do I have to tell you to stop calling me ‘Young Master Yoon’?” Doojoon said, smiling at him.

Secretary Park bowed to him.

“My apologies, Young Master Yoon. It’s become a bad habit.”