Drinking that much…doing that much…you would think that maybe, just maybe, he wouldn’t recall what he did. But he remembered everything. The way his body reacted with pleasure to hurting Mir and even worse, the words he spat in his face continued to resonate within his mind.

But worst of all, the one thing that made Dongwoon truly question his feelings, was that he brought himself to do all of those things. Inside of him, he had a monster that wanted to hurt Mir and anyone else. Did he mean those words?

?

?

He rolled over, popping another aspirin and groaning. If possible, he would’ve been looking out the window trying to burn his own eyes with the sun’s rays. However, his lids were swollen shut from pathetically shed tears.

Why hadn’t he chased after Mir like a normal person? Even if he had been drunk, it was no excuse for what he did and failed to do. What if Mir had been ? Dongwoon checked his phone again, his heart dropping once more at the sight of no missed calls or texts. Although he continued wondering why he hadn’t run after him, he knew the reason.

Dongwoon had been terrified. What if he lost control again and attacked Mir? What if…just what if he woke up the next morning and found the boy bludgeoned to death? Yes, the situation was extreme, but Dongwoon had been so aggressive. Was he really an angry drunk? His face crumpled as sobs shook his frame. No tears fell, all of them already dried up. Things had gone to hell for real this time. How could he fix what he had done? Just what the could he do to make Mir come back?

I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…please come back, Mir…I really didn’t mean to.

No matter how many times he repeated those words inside, they wouldn’t tumble forward. There was no reason for them to tumble forward when the person he needed to hear them wasn’t around.

Suddenly, he heard the front door click open. Dongwoon jolted upright, thrown off kilter when blood rushed to his head. Staggering, he fell over, crashing into the floor before scrambling back up and racing towards the door. It had to be Mir. He came back. Rounding a corner, Dongwoon saw Taemin standing there and behind him was a bandaged and tired looking Mir.

“What the happened to you?” the pretty boy scoffed, looking the disheveled male up and down. “You must’ve been seriously wasted last night. Nice going, dip .”

Dongwoon didn’t bother to banter with him. His eyes were locked on the boy behind him, chest stinging when he saw the injury he had caused. “I’m sorry, Mir,” he said quickly, voice a coarse, broken mess, “I didn’t know what I was doing and that’s not an excuse but I’ll never drink again. I swear I’ll never make you feel scared like that. You’re—”

“Would you shut up for a second?” Taemin snapped, kicking Dongwoon back. Smirking at the slow reaction and well landed blow, he stepped further into the apartment. Standing over the hunched over figure, he nudged his head. “I don’t know how Mir did it, but he managed to ride a local city bus one town over and then take a cab back to my university. When I saw him, he had a makeshift bandage and dirt and tears all over him. Now, I had to wonder, what happened? It couldn’t have been Dongwoon. That little pain in the , goodie-two-shoes would never have the balls to hurt Mir. But guess what I found out? Your little pain in the , ing goodie-two-shoes act apparently didn’t hold up. Were you just waiting for a chance to drink and abuse him?”

Taemin kicked Dongwoon backwards again, fury blazing in his eyes. Grinding his heel into the male’s winded chest, he continued talking, “Well look here, I’m not a push over like that sweet little guy over there. You with him and I’ll you up. Love never dies. I will chase you to hell and watch you burn in the flames before I let you get back with this boy.” Pausing he looked more closely at Dongwoon, seeing how puffy his eyes were and how shaky his body was. “Dude…you’re pathetic. You get into your first fight with Mir and end up a crying mess? What the hell. It’s been like five hours since you guys fought and in that time you couldn’t think of a better way to spend your time than mope? What about repenting for your mistakes, ?”

Dongwoon really didn’t recall this boy having such a sharp tongue. Then again, it was Taemin. Everything he said was filthy and true. He seemed tougher now though, more mature yet vulgar. Looking past the pretty boy, he met Mir’s eyes again. “Five hours is already too long,” he said softly.

“Yeah, it is,” Mir mumbled, covering his eyes as he tried not to cry more.

Taemin looked back and forth between them, nodding firmly. Backing off from the man he had been standing on, he walked to the door, pausing to kiss Mir’s lips. “Don’t cry anymore,” he smiled affectionately, “I beat up the bad guy for you.”

He returned the smile shakily, “You’re a lot stronger these days…huh?”

“Have to be. We’re adults now, right?” Taemin grinned, winking and heading for the exit. Slipping past the threshold, he said, “Break up or make up. I don’t care. Just make the right decision, Mir.”

Dongwoon sighed. Of course Taemin wouldn’t have any encouraging words for him. Once the door shut and they were alone, everything stilled. Who knew how long they were like that before Dongwoon was clearing his throat and saying once again, “Five hours is already too long.”

“Yeah it is,” he responded quietly.

“How long have we known each other?”

“Two and a half years.”

“That’s a long time.”

Mir giggled softly, “Yeah…it’s a long time.”

He cracked a smile, still half lying on the floor – stomach hurting too much to move. “Do you think I’m romantic?”

“Impulsive…more so,” he answered, smile forming on his lips.

Dongwoon opened his mouth, but then hesitated, changing his mind as he said, “For as long as I live, I’ll spend it repenting to you. What I did was inexcusable.”

“I know you will.” His reply was confident and easy, but most importantly, natural.

“I’m glad,” he exhaled, coughing a little, “…forever is a really long time. You know that, don’t you?”

Mir nodded, features bright with warmth and humor, “It’s never ending.”

“I love you, Mir.”

“I…,” he chuckled, straightening his back and moving a little further into the room, “I love you, too.”

“…Five hours is already too long.”

“You already said that,” Mir murmured casually.

“I don’t want to fight with you ever again.”

“A couple who fights doesn’t grow,” he responded.

Dongwoon shrugged, “Then let’s hit our peak of growth already.”

“What do you…?”

“…Marry me.”

Mir’s face melded into a torrid of emotions and then he dropped to his knees, throwing himself on top of Dongwoon. “All it took was five hours?” he laughed. “Don’t you think that’s crazy?”

“Like I said, five hours is already too long. I sorted my feelings out after three.” He winced, but smiled nonetheless, wrapping his arms around the boy.

“We don’t have any money.”

“We’ll make money.”

“We’re really young.”

“No we’re not. Taemin said so. We’re adults.”

“You’re impulsive.”

“My impulses have always led to good things.”

The End.