It had been known for a while. For a long while actually. It's just he was denying it. His heart couldn't bare to think that it would happen. That this thing this abominable monster had taken hold and was not letting go. And here he was sitting by his side. It was torture but to the other it was comfort, to a certain extent.

“You can't leave me, promise me”

A weak almost quiet chuckle was heard.

“I promise to leave only when you are ready.”

He stayed silent, his throat tightening as he reached for the others hand and held it.

“I'll never be ready. Please don't go ok?”

“You're so sweet.”

He smiled lifting his other hand to caress a soft cheek. “Do you remember when we first met?”

“How can I forget. I was so embarrassed. I had tripped over myself at the bar and spilled my drink all over you.”

“That's right. I wasn't even mad. You were gorgeous, and with that blush on your cheeks.”

He shook his head leaning over placing his head on his hand. He felt one of his hands threading through his hair. His fingers were slightly shaking from the effort it took move.

“And then when we went on our first date. We went to Disneyland in Japan, remember?”

He chuckled slightly as he remembered that day. He moved his head caressing his cheek against the other's hand. Without really noticing the tears began to slip down as the other continued to speak softly. Remembering all of their dates, dinners, vacations, even mentioning some of the fights they'd had until he had cried himself out.

“But the one thing that always sticks in my mind is that one time. The first time we told each other 'I love you.' How ing cliché too it was during hanami, we were in Japan then too. You looked gorgeous with cherry blossom petals in your hair.”

He closed his eyes remembering how beautiful that day had been, they had been in Japan for a break from their busy lives. All the sakura petals falling around them. It was impossible to not have seen how much they had already fallen for each other.

“And I'll tell you again and again, I love you.”

“I love you too and I promise I'll never forget you. You are the best thing that's happened in my life.”

He continued to smile as he caressed the soft hair with his hand slowing his movement down a bit.

“I think I'm ready. I'm sorry I'm being selfish. It's causing you so much pain. But my heart hurts just thinking...” he stopped as new tears bubbled up spilling over as he lifted his face to look at his lover. “It hurts me too sweetheart, so much. I just... promise me to be happy...”

A sob escaped him as he nodded leaning over more. “I promise. I promise to do anything you want” he whispered as he kissed his lips. “I love you.” “Love you too my heart. Thank you....thank you so much for loving me like you have and still do.”

“Please...”

“Let's take a nap 'k? We'll talk some more later. We'll remember the times with the guys alright?”

“'K” he nodded moving to curl up next to him closing his eyes letting exhaustion from the past weeks take him.

“I.. love you.” The tears he had been holding in were finally released as he turned and placed a soft kiss on his smooth forehead. “I knew I was going to lose you...I just didn't realize it was going to happen this fast...”


Comments are nice? Hopefully maybe you wont burn me? I'd prefer a quick death personally.  ,__,