Sooyoung took the steps two at a time as she ran up the stairs to Hyoyeon's apartment. Her ribs ached and she was starting to see spots from the running, but determination burned in her chest stronger than she could remember ever feeling. She reached Hyoyeon's door, and she didn't hesitate. She pounded violently three times on the door.

"Hyo, open up, it's me" she yelled at it. She waited, and took the opportunity to try and regain her breath.

"It's open" came the reply from inside. As Sooyoung walked in, she was momentarily floored by how empty the place was. Everything that wasn't big furniture was packed into boxes, and the floor was so clean, it seemed to be shining.

She took a deep breath and threw her jacket on the floor.

"Where are you?" she said loudly.

"In here!" Hyoyeon called back from the living room. Sooyoung took three long steps and pushed the door open.

Inside was Hyoyeon, on her knees in the couch, lifting up the pillows one by one and looking underneath them.

"What are you doing?" Sooyoung asked, a little confused.

"I'm looking for things I might have lost" Hyoyeon answered, and Sooyoung felt herself fall even deeper in love with the weirdness of the girl. "Why, what's up?" Hyoyeon asked before sitting back down on the couch again. "You look worried." Noticing her own frown, Sooyoung started pacing backwards and forwards through the room.

Now, let's not back out.

"Yeah" she said in a breath, "yeah, okay. Okay, so..." Sooyoung spun around, trying to think of a way to start. Everything she wanted to say was building up into a pile inside her, and she knew she was gonna explode unless she got them out soon.

"Did something happen?" Hyoyeon asked, now looking nervous. That did it.

"Yes, yes, something happened - a few months ago" Sooyoung said. "I met you, and you were all nice to me, all weird and wonderful, right? And I liked you, I liked you so much from the very first time we met." Sooyoung was talking fast, she didn't dare to stop and think about what she was gonna say next. "You infected me with all these feelings for you, and I know you've noticed that, okay?" she looked at Hyoyeon for a quick second, but her face was unreadable. "So, I try to help you as much as I can, and then you're leaving! And I find myself crying myself to sleep at night because I'm terrified of losing you, which by the way is something I've never done before. But then all of a sudden, you go and try to kiss me, and afterwards you just pretend like it never happened!" The last words came out too loudly in Sooyoung's ears, and she thought she was gonna throw up from the strength of her own heartbeats.

"Soo..." Hyoyeon started, but Sooyoung cut her off.

"No, no, no no no!" she almost yelled, finding it hard to control her voice. "See, first, we don't talk at all, and then we talk, but only about all the wrong things, and now you've got me rambling on like an incoherent idiot, so just shut up for a second and let me try something."

Sooyoung half ran up to the couch, threw herself down beside Hyoyeon and pressed her lips against hers.

Her mind went blank. She didn't know what she was doing. For a few seconds, nobody moved, and those few seconds were enough for a panic to start rising in Sooyoung's chest. She was just about to pull away

and she felt Hyoyeon kiss her back.

All thoughts gone.

She could feel her hands acting on their own accord, Hyoyeon's back, up over her shoulders, neck - and she could feel the older girl's hands in her hair... And it was everything, it was life, it was electricity, it was ecstasy she'd never felt before. She could feel herself tremble as magic shot through her body, and...

Sooyoung pulled away.

They looked at each other, catching their breaths. Sooyoung's senses were still spinning, and as the storm in her head calmed, she didn't know what to say. Hyoyeon's beautiful dark eyes were piercing her.

"I..." she started, but Hyoyeon pressed her finger to Sooyoung's lips.

"You're right" she said. "You're absolutely right." She let her finger fall, and Sooyoung waited for an explanation. When nothing came, she shook her head slowly.

"Why did you ignore me, Hyo?" she asked, and her heart seemed to have lost its rhythm. "After that night in the pub... Why didn't you talk to me?" A part of her wanted to accuse Hyoyeon of toying with her emotions, but something in her eyes stopped her.

"Same reason you didn't talk to me, I suppose" Hyoyeon said. Sooyoung stared at her, not knowing what to make of it. "Fear." She could see the honesty in the other girl's eyes, and she understood what it meant.

"But..." she started, working up the courage to go on. "Did you know? About me?" Hyoyeon nodded.

"Yes" she said. "I mean, I thought I did, but I kept telling myself it was just wishful thinking." She caressed Sooyoung's hair, and Sooyoung felt her eyes start to water as she looked into Hyoyeon's. As Hyoyeon was about to take her hand back, Sooyoung took hold of it, and let their hands rest in her lap.

"So..." Sooyoung said, looking down. She didn't know if she wanted to ask the question or not, but she had to know. "What does this mean?" She looked back up again, and saw Hyoyeon look back at her with tearful eyes.

"Everything doesn't have to have a meaning" she replied.

Sooyoung couldn't believe how much she had come to hate those words. She lay down on her back and stared at the ceiling, not being able to process what was just being said. What's happening? Am I really here?

Hyoyeon crawled up beside her and looked in her eyes.

"I'm sorry" she whispered carefully. Sooyoung shut her eyes and tried to decide what the best thing to say was, which way to go. Everything was happening so fast, she didn't understand time, she didn't understand what was gonna happen. Hyoyeon liked her back? Hyoyeon liked her, and it didn't mean anything? Nothing would change?

"No, Hyo, don't say that" she said as she had so many times before. "I still understand" she whispered, careful not to let her voice break. "But I'm not gonna try and tell you how much I hate this."

"I know" came the whispered answer. Hyoyeon lay down her head on Sooyoung's shoulder, and Sooyoung took her hand. "I know." 

Sooyoung breathed in the smell of Hyoyeon's hair, and for the first time, she didn't have to hide it. Hyoyeon said she understood, but Sooyoung wondered how that was possible. The relief of finally having confessed, the insane happiness of having Hyo there with her, the panic when she thought of the coming day? Did she really understand?

She started caressing Hyoyeon's hand with her own. She knew what would happen tomorrow, but the weight of Hyoyeon on top of her made it hard for any heavy thoughts to enter her head.

I can stay in denial one last night she thought as she kissed Hyoyeon's hair.

Sooyoung woke up with a start to the ringing of the doorbell. She sat up to see Hyoyeon lying beside her, looking as tired and confused as Sooyoung herself felt. Hyoyeon looked around the room with a frown for a few seconds before sitting up straight, her eyes wide.

"It's the moving company!" she cried, and Sooyoung's jaw dropped. "Holy..." Hyoyeon whispered and jumped out of bed, and Sooyoung was quick to follow.

"Do you want me to go?" she asked as she pulled her sweater over her head.

"No, no, please stay" Hyoyeon said and cringed a little as she heard the doorbell ring again. "Just a minute!" she called in an oddly high-pitched voice. She buttoned her pants and started running around the room. "Damn, why are there no freaking mirrors in here?!" she half-yelled, and ran over to the window. Sooyoung couldn't help but laugh. "I'm gonna let them in, are you okay?" Hyoyeon asked as she quickly tried to straighten out her hair. Sooyoung hurriedly pulled up her jeans.

"I am... now" she said as she struggled with the button. "You can now let them in without making them want to call the police." Hyoyeon laughed and gave her a quick peck on the lips, before running out to open the door. Warmth spread in Sooyoung's stomach.

She had to stifle a laugh as two girls walked in the door. Both of them were shorter than Sooyoung, who in fairness was pretty tall, but one of them was so short that Sooyoung started to wonder whether this girl was more than 12 years old.

"Well, better get started" the taller of the two said and started talking towards a box, which held Hyoyeon's TV and accessories.

"Are you sure you'll be okay there?" Sooyoung asked a little nervously, as the girl bent down.

"Oh, don't worry" the girl replied, and to Sooyoung's surprise, she lifted the box without breaking a sweat. "I'm perfectly capable." Hyoyeon appeared in the doorway, and as the girl passed her, she exchanged an amazed look with Sooyoung.

Hyoyeon and Sooyoung jumped up on the kitchen counter, and remained there beside each other while the girls finished their work.

"Do you think that tall girl had some hidden powers?" Hyoyeon asked once both the other girls were out in the car. "Like, maybe she's vampire slayer, or a superhero, or something!" Sooyoung laughed and took Hyoyeon's hand in hers.

"A secret identity of some sort, for sure" she smiled. "Have I mentioned you watch too much TV?" Hyoyeon glared at her, and Sooyoung leaned in to kiss her.

They pulled apart as the short girl entered the kitchen. Even though Sooyoung couldn't help but feel a little embarrassed, she was again filled with a strange amusement over the girl's height.

"Excuse me" she said carefully. The short girl looked at her. "How did you get this job?" Sooyoung asked and tried not to sound too mean. It didn't seem to help, though, as the short girl looked offended.

"I'm stronger than I look" she said surly, while glaring at her.

"I should hope so" Sooyoung answered before she could help herself, and received a nudge in the ribs from Hyoyeon. "What?" she mouthed to her, but she didn't answer.

"I was just gonna say" the short girl said, "we're just about done now. Unless we've forgotten something?"

"No, I think you've got it all" Hyoyeon said with a smile.

"Sunny, don't be slow!" the taller girl called out from the hall.

"Coming, Yoona" Sunny called back. "Right then, we'll be going" she continued and started heading for the door.

"Thanks for all the hard work!" Hyoyeon called after her, a tone of guilt in her voice. Sunny held up a hand to show she'd heard, and then disappeared.

"You're so evil!" Hyoyeon hissed at Sooyoung and jumped down from the counter.

"What?" Sooyoung tried to ask in an innocent tone, but was met with a light slap on her arm. "Ahh, sorry" she said, rubbing her arm and trying on a pout. Hyoyeon laughed at her, her smile breaking through her angry expression.

"Would you stop that? You look to adorable" she said before kissing her again.

They stood looking at each other for a while, playing with each other's hands, both knowing where this day was leading.

"I'm sorry to say this, but..." Hyoyeon said, "I have to clean the rest of the apartment." Sooyoung nodded.

"Oh, right. Well... when can I see you?" she asked carefully, trying to not let her thoughts touch what was about to happen.

"My train leaves at 8.30" Hyoyeon answered slowly. "Will you be there?" she added nervously. Sooyoung swallowed the sudden pain in . It made a short journey down to her heart, where it joined all its friends.

"Yes" she said hoarsely, trying to seem okay. Hyoyeon looked at her.

"I wish you could come with me" she whispered. Sooyoung didn't dare to answer in fear of crying again, but closed her eyes and pulled Hyoyeon in as tight as she dared without breaking her.

Me too. God, me too...

Sooyoung arrived at the train station at 8, 30 minutes before Hyoyeon's train would leave and take her to the airport. Away from L.A, away from Sooyoung. Every step she took along the platform made her feel heavier and heavier. She still couldn't bear the thought of saying goodbye to Hyoyeon, but she knew there was no way she could miss this.

She just didn't know what to say, feel or think. Everything had turned out so wrong.

She finally spotted Hyoyeon sitting at a bench with three bags in front of her, staring out in space.

Sooyoung stopped the moment she saw her. Her heart started beating so much it hurt, and it took all her willpower not to let the tears fall right there.

Only a few seconds passed before Hyoyeon looked up and saw her. Even from the distance, Sooyoung could tell she was already crying.

Hyoyeon got up, leaving all her bags behind her and started running towards her. Sooyoung's body was numb, the reality of everything was about to hit her. Hyoyeon was there, crying, with her bags, about to go on a train, and Sooyoung didn't know when they could ever see each other again.

Hyoyeon stumbled into her embrace, tears streaming silently down her cheeks and into the collar of Sooyoung's shirt. Sooyoung her back, her hair, taking in the small and the feel of Hyoyeon's body so close to her own.

How can I let go?

She didn't say anything. She knew she didn't have to. Hyoyeon's hands were trying to pull her closer, even though there was no room for either of them to breath.

"Sooyoung, I--"

"No, no, don't. Please... don't."

"But there's just so much that..."

"It's too much. Please, I can't..." Sooyoung looked away, she couldn't take watching everything fall apart.

"But, we will see each other, right, Soo?" Hyoyeon asked, her voice full of tears. Sooyoung didn't know what to say, she was so close to panicking about that very question, so how could she comfort someone in the same way she needed to be? "Please, tell me we..."

"We will, okay?" She said. "Of course we will" she whispered, trying to comfort both Hyoyeon and herself at the same time. Otherwise, I don't know how I'll get by. Hyoyeon nodded slowly, her face drenched in tears.

"God, Soo, I--" she started.

"Don't say you're sorry" Sooyoung repeated the words she'd said so many times she'd lost count.

The trained opened its doors with a hissing, and though Sooyoung felt as if every part of her body might fall off, she lead Hyoyeon back to the bench to pick up her bags. "Your train leaves in 7 minutes" she said, looking up at the big clock above them. Where the hell did the last of our time go?

Hyoyeon put her hands to her face and pulled them through her hair.

"God..." she mumbled as she tried to dry her tears. Sooyoung decided to try her best to ignore everything, picked up a bag and handed it to Hyoyeon, while lifting the other two up on her shoulders. Mechanically, without thinking, she walked over to the open door to the train and, with great effort, but the heavy bags in on the floor. She turned back to Hyoyeon, who were still drying her tears, and took her hand, helping her up to the first step. They looked in each other's eyes. Now when Hyoyeon was standing on the steps, she was about as tall as Sooyoung.

"Wouldn't want you to miss your train" Sooyoung said and attempted a smile.

Hyoyeon kissed her. She could feel her tears, still falling, and it was heaven. It was a painful, bittersweet heaven, and she forgot where she was when she tasted the salt on Hyoyeon's lips.

The doors started closing with a squeaking sound, putting an end to what Sooyoung knew was their last kiss. She blocked the doors with her hands, allowing Hyoyeon to take another step up into the train.

"Goodbye, Sooyoung" she said slowly and backed up the last step. About to let the doors close, Sooyoung remembered there was one thing left to say.

"Hyoyeon, I..." Hyoyeon looked at her, waiting, and Sooyoung could feel herself weakening. Now was not the time to decide. "Good luck" she finished weakly. Through her tears, Hyoyeon managed a smile.

"Yeah..." she said, trying to hold on to that smile.

Sooyoung let go. The girls looked at each other as the doors swung shut.

The train started moving. Sooyoung walked along with it, trying to see in through the windows, but Hyoyeon was gone. Desperately wanting one last look at her, she run along with it as long as she could, but eventually had to face that Hyoyeon was gone, and slowed down.

The train flew past her, and the draft it left behind it toyed with her short hair.

She sunk down to her knees, and she didn't think any further before the tears started to fall. There were only a few people left on the platform, but she couldn't care.

She regretted having kept her grief inside her for so long, as she felt she now had to deal with everything at the same time. Her mind immediately started reassuring her with promises that, as soon as she got home, she could call her. She could call her a lot, it was worth spending a lot of money on...

But she took herself down to earth. Hyoyeon was gone.

There was nothing to it.

Tiffany lay on her stomach, mindlessly staring at the TV. She didn't want to call Sooyoung, even though the unresolved question of her and Hyoyeon still had no answer. She assumed something must have gone alright though, since she'd stayed there overnight...

She looked at the clock on the wall. It was getting late. She sent a silent prayer up to the skies, that Hyoyeon had somehow come to her senses and decided to stay.

At the exact same moment Tiffany turned off the TV, it knocked on the door. Worried, she swept her pink bathrobe closer around her and opened the door.

Sooyoung was there. Her face was puffed and her eyes were red, tears still running down her cheeks.

"Sooyoung?" Tiffany asked, as her heart fell inside her. "What happened?" But Sooyoung just walked through the door, into Tiffany's arms, and she could tell there's was nothing she could say that would make things better. She closed the door and just held her. Sooyoung was still wearing her jacket and shoes, but neither of them cared. They sank down on the floor, and Tiffany cradled her from side to side.

"I'm so tired of crying" Sooyoung said at last, and Tiffany understood it all. Hyoyeon was gone

And there was nothing to it.