Sooyoung lay in Tiffany's guest bed, staring at the alarm clock in her hand. She didn't know how long she'd been staring at it, her eyes were starting to feel blurry, and her body heavy. She almost wanted to sleep, but she'd been doing that so much lately that her head was feeling muddled.

She had made the bed with bright green sheets, as she knew it was Hyoyeon's favorite color. It didn't make her feel better - it was just another reminder of what she had loved and eventually lost. No, it was one of her irrational hopes that, maybe, just maybe - if she ate Hyoyeon's favorite foods, she would... come back. If she listened to Hyoyeon's favorite music, she would come home. If she slept in green sheets, Hyoyeon would...

The minute hand on the clock snapped and clicked, and Sooyoung blinked. The distant noise from the sitcom Tiffany was watching in the living room suddenly came back, but it didn't take long until it faded from Sooyoung's ears again.

It was all over. Sooyoung had been planning to start getting on with her life... every day. But there seemed to be too much to think about, to many could-have-beens and too many...

If only.

If only she would have said something earlier. Things could have been so different, so good. Maybe she wouldn't have been lying alone in Tiffany's guest bed, maybe she would be in Hyoyeon's. And she wouldn't be looking at a tiny, white clock with an alarm sound that was enough to wake the entire building - no, she could have been looking into Hyoyeon's eyes.

Thinking of those eyes made her heart beat painfully hard, but she forced herself to remember. She didn't want to forget the feeling of Hyoyeon's lips against hers. Her smell. Her hands. Her smile.

So far away, and so beautiful.

There was so much she could have said. Should have said. She'd been scared of telling Hyoyeon how beautiful she was, but now, she'd give anything to be able to tell her everything. How she adored her randomness, her cheekiness. The way she kissed. Sooyoung wanted to tell her how much that one night they really had meant to her, and how much she had loved to wake up beside her.

But none of that would matter now. She had no plans to tell her. But there was still so much that Sooyoung wanted Hyoyeon to know.

And you didn't even tell her you loved her...

The clock ticked for the millionth time, and Sooyoung threw the duvet off herself with a deep sigh.

She couldn't stay there. She needed to do something.

"Fany, I'm gonna go home and get some clothes and stuff, okay?" she called as she crawled out of bed. She stood in the doorway, looking in at Tiffany who was sat on the couch in her usual pink bathrobe.

"Okay" she said, turning to look at Sooyoung with worried eyes. "Do you want me to come with?"

"No, I'm probably gonna take a walk or something first" Sooyoung said, trying to straighten out her bed-hair. "I'll be okay."

"Alright, well, call me if you change your mind" Tiffany said hesitantly, and Sooyoung couldn't help but feel a little touched at how worried she seemed.

"Thanks" she said, with the first smile that day. "I will."

As soon as she walked out the door, she changed her mind about going home. It felt like the last place on earth she'd ever want to be, so she started wandering around town. The sun was shining, it was a little breezy, a perfect summer day, but everywhere she looked, she saw traces of Hyoyeon.

Look, there's the bench she was sitting on the third time we met. The time before I walked her home, and we exchanged phone numbers.

And over there is that tree that she almost hit with the car when we were going to the fair... to bungee jump. I still can't believe she actually went through with that.

The cinema... the popcorn war.

And here's the street that leads to her ap... her old apartment, I mean. Is it always gonna feel this way when I walk around this place?

As she got to the park, she made sure she sat on another bench than the one where they met the third time. She covered her face with her hands and lightly knocked herself on the forehead -- When did this happen? When did you fall so much in love with this girl? How can she have such power over your life when she's so far away?

She leaned back, watching the people in the fairly empty park talk, play and sunbathe. Her mind automatically started thinking of things she and Hyoyeon could have done there, but she stopped herself before it hurt too much.

Instead, she tried to focus on Tiffany. She was the only thing that had kept Sooyoung sustained in the last week, the biggest thing she could hold on to. She had held her, wiped away tear after tear after tear, and she had tried to make her laugh, think of other things, and even though Sooyoung mostly felt as if she was in the very slow process of falling apart, she had to admit that it had helped. It was amazing to her how Tiffany seemed to have endless energy, how she never gave up on Sooyoung.

A couple of days earlier, Sooyoung had broken down to cry again, and desperately asked Tiffany if things were always gonna be like that. Tiffany had calmly answered that, no, they don't. "After a while, other things start to mean something to you, and eventually, everything that was important before regains its grace." At once, Sooyoung had wanted to punch those words back into Tiffany's mouth.

But she hoped she was right.

She hoped she was right, but she didn't understand how it was possible. How could she focus on anything else, when everything she did reminded her of what was missing?

She reached into her pocket and pulled up her phone, considering calling Tiffany. She opened her message inbox and looked at the last text she had received from Hyoyeon - it was from before she left. She hadn't texted, called or done anything to contact her in a week - the longest it had been since they met for the first time. Sooyoung didn't know if she should see it as a good or a bad thing. She had written several messages, but never sent them, and stared at Hyoyeon's number on the screen but never dared to call.

She looked up to see a girl and a boy, holding hands, sitting down on Sooyoung and Hyoyeon's bench. She immediately stood up and turned around. Home must be better than here.

She found her apartment almost exactly as it looked when she had left it last time, to go to dinner with Hyoyeon and Tiffany. The only difference was the dust that had begun to fall on the floor and furniture, making the rooms look like they had been abandoned in a hurry. Maybe I should clean some while I'm here Sooyoung thought as she threw her keys at the floor. ...But then again, who am I kidding.

She picked up her large pile of mail and dropped it on the shelf beside her, and as she leant down to remove her shoes, one of the letters caught her eye.

At the top of the pile was a grey envelope, with a simple "Sooyoung" written on it in gold. She stopped dead in her tracks and stared at it for a few seconds, curiosity sparkling to life in her chest. She grabbed the envelope and knelt down on the dusty floor, before carefully ripping the letter open.

She almost started seeing stars when she recognized Hyoyeon's shaky handwriting. A rock sank in her stomach.

She turned the envelope around and stared at it. "Sooyoung", it said. Nothing else.

How did she post..?

Deciding that was the wrong thing to focus on, she mentally slapped herself and started to hastily, but carefully, read the letter.

Dear Sooyoung

I know you hate it when I say this, but I'm sorry. I'm sorry for leaving. I'm sorry for making it so hard on you, I'm sorry for all the times I cried in front of you. I don't want you to think for a second that you caused me any pain. I'm so thankful for everything that you've done for me, all the things you helped me with - I feel horrible for leaving you after all that you've done.

I'm also sorry for not keeping in touch, not contacting you. I don't know what to say about that... I don't know why I haven't, it's just been... hard, you know? Not being able to see you is hard enough as it is, and well... I guess I thought that it would make it harder, somehow. I guess we'll see.

I know we've talked about this a million times before, too, but I really, really hope you can accept the reason why I've left. That even though I have feelings for you, and I have all my friends in LA, I have to follow my dream. And it is my dream, you know? Writing, seeing the world, living in a foreign country... I've always dreamt about that, as you know.

But I have another dream.

A dream that I've dreamt for the last months, a dream that was awakened when I met a tall, nervous, oh so pretty girl in an office. A dream that's been driving me every single night since the first time I really talked to her, and started to get to know her.

A dream that became reality just over a week ago, when she told me all those wonderful things that I never could have imagined she would.

So there are the two dreams, both being realized at the same time. So which one should I choose?

Well, I have dreamt of writing... my entire life. Since I started thinking about those things. I've had some opportunities and I've lost them, and that feeling is... something I never want to experience again. A dream being crushed.

But there's something else I should add to all of this. It's something I never planned on, something that just jumped upon me when I really didn't see it coming.

I knew it when you didn't step back from my weirdness. I knew it when I wasn't put off by your shyness. I knew it the first time I woke up in the middle of the night, and saw you awake, looking at me. I knew it when I could talk to you like I've never talked to anyone in my life. I knew it when you put on sweatpants and sweaters and you still made it hard for me to catch my breath when I saw you.

I knew it from the start.

I love you, Sooyoung.

I love you. And a dream of love, turning into reality, is worth more than any other dream I can think of.

That's why I'm going to wait at the train station today, the seventeenth of July, between 1 PM - 4 PM. I understand if you can't trust me again, after leaving you like this, and if that's the case, you don't have to show up. I will understand, and I will go back to Australia.

But if you can forgive me... I'll be waiting for you.

So, can you, Soo? Can you forgive me?

Everything doesn't have to have a meaning, but some things do. I love you, Sooyoung.

(P.S: I'm sorry for the cheesiness.)

Sooyoung let her hand drop, and the letter rustled onto the floor. Panic welled up in her as she reached for her phone, folding it up to look at the date --

Seventeenth of July.

And the time?

3 PM.

She threw herself at the door, but halfway there she remembered her keys and made a leap back, which caused her to fall on the floor. Laughing, she reached for her keys before standing up and running out the door.

Hyoyeon turned a page in the book she had been reading for the past hours. It was almost over, and it seemed to her she'd read more than half of it that same day.

Time had never moved slower.

From the very minute she got there, she had been checking the time every five minutes until she stopped herself. If she didn't look at the clock that often, it at least seemed as if time moved a little faster.

It didn't help that the bench she was sitting on had become really uncomfortable after three hours, or that the old man beside her kept mumbling nonsense to himself. Neither did it help that her heart was constantly beating too hard, as she thought of the chance that Sooyoung might show up...and the risk that she wouldn't. Every time somebody entered the waiting hall, Hyoyeon half leapt out of her seat - always to be disappointed.

She had been nervous when she first sat down - but it was nothing compared to what she felt now. It was only 30 minutes left of the time she had put down in the letter.

The whole day had been exhausting. She had arrived in LA the previous day, and in her desperation, she had called Jessica, looking for a place to stay. Jessica had kindly let her stay in her apartment, and Hyoyeon had sat up all night, biting her nails and trying to compose the letter to Sooyoung. She struggled with the words: it wasn't hard to write something, but to write what she really wanted to stay. She had finally fallen to sleep at 5AM after making sure the final draft of the letter was acceptable.

After two rewrites the next morning, she was outside Sooyoung's apartment at 11.30 AM to actually leave the letter - again, terrified. But she hadn't gotten caught, and by 12AM she was at the train station, an hour earlier than what she put in the letter.

The waiting hall was enormous and there were people everywhere - so she never stopped looking for Sooyoung.

She took a couple of deep breaths to calm herself, and looked up at the clock. She barely registered the time 3:39, before seeing Sooyoung stand in the doorway of the waiting hall. Hyoyeon lost her breath.

She's here.

She slowly stood up from the bench, letting the book slide down from her lap onto the floor with a muffled thump. The old man next to her looked up at her with an offended expression, but Hyoyeon's eyes were fixed upon Sooyoung. Neither of them moved.

Sooyoung's hair was ruffled, she looked as tired as Hyoyeon felt, but wearing jeans and a light green t-shirt, she was as beautiful as ever.

"Oh my God" Hyoyeon mumbled, and again the old man looked at her with angry eyes. Sooyoung slowly started making her way over to Hyoyeon, her face not showing any signs of happiness or sadness. Hyoyeon's heart started beating harder than she had ever felt it do, and for a second she wondered if she was going to faint.

She steadied herself as Sooyoung reached her. She noticed Sooyoung had tears in her eyes, but she didn't know what to make of it.

Seconds passed, and neither of them spoke. They both looked in each other's eyes, and Hyoyeon silently pleaded say something. Say anything. Please, just say something. Sooyoung just looked back at her with the same beautiful, tear-filled eyes.

Hyoyeon took a deep breath. There were so many things that needed to be said.

"Sooyoung, I'm --" she began.

Sooyoung kissed her hard on the lips. Before she knew it, she was in Sooyoung's embrace, and she was holding her, touching her, and everything was okay.

She kissed back, and it was possessive, protective, promising and wondering, all at the same time, and it didn't end - she clung on to the taller girl, pressing them together as close as they could get, and she needed to breathe but she didn't want to break the kiss - she was convinced she could live her entire life with Sooyoung's lips in exchange for air...

They broke apart, both close to panting for air. Relief, love and longing spread in Hyoyeon's body like a virus, and she didn't know what to say.

"Can I..." she whispered, "should I take that to mean you forgive me?" Sooyoung looked into her eyes.

"That depends" she whispered back, "are you really here? I'm not just dreaming? Cause if I wake up now, I will never forgive you."

"I am" Hyoyeon laughed softly.

"Then, yes" Sooyoung said with a smile, before pressing her lips against Hyoyeon's once more.

"I love you, Sooyoung" Hyoyeon whispered, feeling all the anxiety leaving her body like magic.

"I love you too" Sooyoung answered, and they disappeared into the ecstasy of finally having said it, and finally hearing it. They kissed again, slowly, knowing that they had time. Finally.

They broke apart, and all of a sudden became aware of their surroundings again. The old man beside Hyoyeon got up, picked up his bags and walked away, throwing scared glances at them as he went.

Hyoyeon and Sooyoung laughed.

They walked out of the train station hand in hand, stopping every ten seconds to kiss again, attracting attention from everyone around. Too happy to speak more than a few words at a time, too happy to do anything but laugh, they walked out into the sunlight. Every tear had been worth it.

And as they started walking towards Sooyoung's home, they started living the dream that finally came true, together.