Eyelashes flittered before closed lids as the gentle tones of an artist’s lullaby were channelled into Sunggyu’s ears through his headphones.
Nell.
To say he idolised them was an understatement – his admiration overflowed in his every word, thought and action. In fact, they were what had lead him to pursue the life of a singer, the chance to meet them, to be like them, all these things set him on edge. He never once thought that he would become their junior and share their label; it was a privilege and honour to say the least
Of course the fact that they shared these things did not mean that they were acquainted in the slightest – Sunggyu had only met them twice and both times were in passing. It was taste enough, however, to sustain his hunger. More than anything, it provided a destination, a solid goal that he could visualise and actively pursue with more vigour than ever.
He hadn’t noticed it, but the lyrics slipped between his parted lips. It was a second nature for him to sing along, and it didn’t surprise him that today was no different.

“Even within the air brushing past my cheeks in the evening,
In everything I see, hear and feel,  you are there,
Yeah, and how are you?
How are you?”

He knew the lyrics like the back of his hand, but he didn’t truly understand them. He hoped he never would, really. He didn’t much look forward to the idea of having to live through a separation like that.
However, he had to force himself to be filled with emotion as he recounted the words. Later that night, he would be performing a cover of the song live on radio. The thought frightened him a little, but the adrenaline and the honour were enough to see him through the worst of the nerves. He hadn’t yet hit the nausea that arrived alongside fear and anxiety, though perhaps that was laid down to his past experience. Nausea, he had discovered, only made things worse in the long run. 
As the song drew to a close, he turned his iPod off; making sure to wind his headphones up, and sighed before heading off to check on the other members.

His eyes slid shut, focusing on the music and allowing it to take control.  There was no one else in the room, that’s what he had to tell himself. Before he knew it, the song was over and the studio staff members clapped gently and showed their admiration with soft exclamations and comments.
“You really sound like him, I’m impressed!”  He bowed his head graciously at the comment and accepted the compliment.
“Mmm, for a rookie you’re really good. Are you sure you guys only just debuted?” A ripple of soft laughter echoed through each of the seven members, ending at Sunggyu who bowed once more, and breathless gave his thanks, bowing repeatedly to his seniors.
“And on the topic of your debut, how are you guys dealing with it?” The host asked, and from that, conversation bloomed and the radio show progressed.

Myungsoo was talking animatedly, discussing his participation in the music video for Epik High’s Run, and so Sunggyu found himself quietly browsing the real-time comments.  Unfortunately, he almost immediately wished he hadn’t chosen to monitor them. His eyes scanned a few, and they shook him a little.
“Who does that poser think he’s kidding? He’s awful.”
“Nell would be disgraced.”
“Did you hear his voice crack? You call that singing? Go practise a bit more.”
Taking a deep breath, he turned his face away from the monitor and back to the people in the room. As discreetly as possible, he slipped back into conversation and tried to force the comments to the back of his mind. Every idol received negative feedback, how could they not? That was how he tried to look at it, but this wasn’t just about his singing, it was almost as if the comments questioned his passion and love for the artist whom he had covered.
A few minutes passed, and a morbid curiosity seemed to take over him, forcing him back to the comments page. In amidst the flood of feedback, he caught two posts that had a very different tone to the others.
“The cover wasn’t bad, he can really sing. Besides, he’s just a rookie remember?”
“He should stop trying to sound like Jongwan, his own voice is just as lovely. The cover would be better if it wasn’t just an imitation.”
He blinked a few times, processing the words. The first one was encouraging, but the second one… The second one just made so much sense. As much as he idolised Nell, he couldn’t replicate, nor would he ever possess their vocals. He had his own voice, and that was enough. People didn’t want to hear a parrot who just repeated what he heard in an unconvincing manner – they wanted a song bird.
A sheepish smile graced his lips as Sungyeol turned to him, rapidly muttering “Hyung, hyung!” to grab his attention.
He hadn’t realised that it was already time to sing another song, and stood up, placing his headphones over his ears. He took his microphone, and smiled as he opened the song. This was better, he thought, singing Infinite’s own tune, with his own voice.
The next time he checked the comment board, it was filled with praise and positivity.

"Let us proceed on our journey, my friend, for it is only the caw of a crow, and her cry, you know, is no omen."