This is something I've been waiting for a long time.

It's hot but now I've arrived at the office of a well known digital company and the cold air of the air conditioning is blowing. The content production department team is showing me around the place, but my ears are not focused because my entire attention is on the boss’ office.

“What is your nickname?”

“Yes?"

“Weren't you listening to me?”

My mentor whose name is ‘Yah’ is looking at me. She notices me staring at the room which is completely covered with frosted glass and she seems to understand that I might ask about it.

“Did you shudder looking at that room? You’re just an intern so don't worry you won't have to see Boss M.L.*”

*TL note : M.L. = Mom Luang – The last title of the Thai royal family or the child of a king’s great-grandchildren, in English the term is translated to "The Honourable"

“Boss M.L.?”

“Yes, we call her Boss M.L., didn’t you know that already?”

I nod my head and smile. Of course I already knew Boss M.L. She is the reason why I tried as hard as I could to work here.

Nobody knows how hard I tried to be like her.

“If I pass the training program, will I get to meet Boss M.L.?”

“Probably. Mon is your nickname, right?” Yah smiles at me and the wrinkles in the corner of her eyes reveals that she’s older than I am. “Maybe, if you pass the program. But why do you want to meet her? An intern wouldn't have any reason to see Boss M.L."

“So there is no chance at all?”

Stay tall and don't get upset. How can I get in touch with her when she is the boss here? My duty as an employee of the company now is to follow orders from the production team. I think there will be a lot to do around here.

"That's not it.”

I give a smile. Yah looks at me and smiles back mercifully.

“That office there is a place where you will lose your smile. Just like Boss M.L. who never smiles. Was she ever happy in her life? I doubt it.”

“But Khun** Sam... Ah. Boss M.L.” I’m trying to call her like the others do to better blend in here. “I saw in a magazine that she smiles a lot.”

**TL Note: ‘Khun’ – a formal pronoun used before a given name.

“She smiles only when the situation forces her to. But never in my life have I ever seen her smile for us. She's usually locked up in her office, that's it.”

Why does it feel like Yah doesn’t like her? My heroine is so lively and beautiful. How do I know that? Because for many many years, I have followed her closely. There’s nothing about her that I don’t know.

I even know that yesterday, she went out to eat at a Japanese restaurant. I’m following her on Instagram.

“You said I might have a chance to meet her. When?”

“In three days, we are having a party to celebrate the company reaching its profit target number. Sadly it’s not the annual trip to Hokkaido.”

She sounded so sad, as if she was in a fairytale and it had just come to an end. Considering the current economy, I felt admiration for the business owner. A party is already good enough.

Later that day as I’m walking past the boss’ office, the door suddenly opens, revealing the person I was dying to see. My heart skipped a beat. Now I’m looking down shyly and feeling so nervous.

It’s a secret love. The scent of Chanel No. 5 floats around in the room. The woman walks past everyone and everyone freeze. Tension is in the air.

“Ahh. She’s gone.” Yah said with a sigh.

“Why did everyone tense up like that? It's as if they turned into stones.”

“You also lowered your head, didn’t you?”

“Well..." I looked down but it was not because I was afraid. It was something else...

“It’s best to avoid eye contact with her. If you don’t want to turn into stone too."

“Are you being serious?”

“Yes. Really.”

Although I’m starting to have an idea about her, I’m still waiting for the day I can meet Boss M.L. The one I’ve been adoring for a long time. I don’t think anyone in this office knows M.L. Samanun as well as I do. You could say I’m a real fan of hers.

I’ve waited ten years to see her.

I can remember her sweet face but she probably doesn’t know who I am. It's okay though. I’m here with no expectations. Just adoring and following this beautiful, intelligent woman is enough for me.

These days, people in the office keep looking at me and coming around to talk to me. It's as if a new student had walked in the middle of the year and everyone in class was staring and being curious. I try my best not to draw too much attention though because I don't want people to be jealous and get myself in trouble.

The company has been running media production, advertising and printing media services. It is still running today because they transitioned to the digital world by implementing social media strategies thanks to Khun Sam's vision. One day, I will be like her.

My duties are to manage documents, appointments and even coffee for this department.

I’m so happy. My happiness does not only come from work, but also from watching the frosted glass for the rare times when Khun Sam leaves to go to the bathroom. She is so diligent that she is almost always in her office, working. What a hardworking woman.

I envy her and wish to be the same. Who wouldn't want to be smart and beautiful like her?

“Hey, everyone. You ready?”

When the clock strikes six o’clock, a good-looking young man in casual clothes came smiling happily towards us. Everyone left their posts and smiled.

“Ready!”

They exclaimed happily. Work was finally over and now it was time to party. Even I rejoiced with the others.

Ah. my heart is beating so fast. I’ll see her from up close.

“Then, see you at the Namo Café. Let’s have fun, today you can eat without limits!”

"Yay!"

They all clap their hands like savages who are on the hunt for a game. Suddenly everyone is silent as the frosted glass door that everyone calls the ‘freezing room’ is opened and the small body of Khun Sam, whom everyone fears, walks out of it.

She is wearing a black casual top, which looks fancy when it’s on her slender body. Her makeup is absolutely flawless. Her face is so sweet and charming, she is staring at everyone with her brown eyes.

“Why are you so excited, huh? Never been to a dinner?” She said before putting her hands in her pockets. “What are you, a mob leader? So loud.”

“They're just happy.”

The young man’s hand rests on her shoulder. I’m amazed at their height difference, she’s so cute.

Everyone here respects her a lot and that’s funny to me. Maybe it’s just me who thinks she’s so… adorable.

I adore everything she does.

The Namo café is reserved for our party. I learn that the good looking young man from earlier who made everyone shout is Mr. Kirk, the second business owner of the company along with Khun Sam. His friend is the owner of the café so it was easy for Mr. Kirk to close the place for us. Also, he is Khun Sam’s fiancé.

A perfect match.

To make us more comfortable, Khun Sam and Mr. Kirk went in a private area. I'm so annoyed by it. I thought I would be seeing Khun Sam’s face from up close.

“What is wrong? You seem upset.”

I’m standing in front of the bathroom mirror. My colleagues are talking to me while I fix my makeup.

“Nothing, I’m just bored. I thought I would see Khun Sam today.”

“Creepy! It’s better this way. If you see her, you won’t enjoy your dinner.”

“Why?”

“A lifeless woman like her will make you sick of the food.”

“Exactly.” Another colleague said in agreement and whispered. “Her face is so tense. It must be Botox, she never smiles and never expresses anything. Even when she’s mad.”

“But everyone fears her.” I said since I am new here and I don't know anything. They explain it to me.

“We are afraid of her because we don’t know what she is thinking. It’s hard to guess. Was she ever happy? We do not know. Even when she found out that one person from accounting is in a relationship with another person from the purchasing team, she didn’t express anything on her face.”

“You are afraid of her because she doesn't smile? I think it’s just because she’s bossy.”

“It would be better if she was bossy, we could handle it. But this, we don’t know how to deal with it.”

“Really? But as far as I know, she’s not like that.”

“Do you know her at all?”

“I don’t... Not really. But she is the type of woman who lights up the world with her smile and she likes dogs.”

“Does she like dogs? I'm telling you, she likes cats.” After my colleague finishes applying her lipstick, she walks away. “Hurry up, or there will be nothing left for you.”

“Okay.”

After everyone exits the bathroom, I still feel disappointed. It’s like all my expectations went down the drain. It would be nice to be able to see her for just a minute. Just a small minute. But there's no chance for that to happen.

So what have I come to work here for ?

I look thoughtfully at my feet for a moment. Then I hear someone flush the toilet. There’s someone else here.

More noise.

A door is opened by a woman the same height as me and the scent of Chanel No. 5 hits my nose. My heart misses a few beats and I see brown eyes staring back at me in the mirror.

“Where did you learn that I liked dogs?”

Uh oh!