“I’m going to the studio, Unnie. Do you want me to grab something for you?”

“No. Be safe on your way there, Momo.”

Momo sighs for the nth time this week, unsure of how to get Seungwan out of her room without being forceful. She still doesn’t know what could have possibly happened that would result in this outcome. Spending the evening with Sana in the car and giving her constructive advice was very fruitful, although it was basically just her watching Sana get to work after a few kisses here and there. When she reached home, Seungwan was already in her own room which isn’t strange at all. After a day of training and vigorous routines, it’s normal for both of them to go straight to sleep.

It was only when Momo went to the company alone for the next two days, Seungwan feeling so unwell she didn’t want to get out of bed. Naturally, the other vocal coaches were brought in quickly to prevent loss of training and hours... so Seungwan’s just required to stay home and rest. It’s getting out of hand though; the woman literally comes out of her room to use the bathroom and maybe eat a little bit but that’s about it.

“Unnie, you don’t have to talk to me but please... speak to someone that you’re comfortable with.” Momo sits down beside Seungwan whose body is completely hidden beneath her covers. She lifts a hand and pats the woman’s head tenderly, “I just want you to be okay... and also because someone’s really worried about you.”

“Thanks, Momo. I’ll be fine soon.”

Seungwan is half tempted to tell Momo the truth; they’ve been friends for a little over three years now, having to work hand in hand with trainees but Momo still doesn’t know much about the latter. Not to say that they’re expected to be a hundred percent transparent with each other, but Momo is certainly more willing to share about herself in comparison to Seungwan who shies away from many private topics.

It’s just so... shameful.

Before Momo walks out of the door, Seungwan squeaks out a soft line. “Can we talk tonight?”

The way Momo’s eyes light up is astounding, like she won the lottery or heard she’d be dancing for eternity. She gives a thumbs up as reassurance and smiles at Seungwan. “Of course, Unnie. I’ll be back right after practice.”

text message from THE hirai momo 🫦

i won’t be able to send you back tonight

think you can leave with Joohyun?

let me know when you’re home though xx

Sana inwardly sighs at the text; she originally planned to show Momo her final draft for her song and maybe the dance routine. The second-to-last elimination is literally in two days, after all. Then again, she knows just as well that relying on Momo’s feedback alone isn’t going to be substantial. It might even look suspicious because Sana didn’t look for any other coach to aid her in writing her song, although Miss Kim was there to fall back on. Ever since the day of the briefing, Miss Son didn’t turn up for other group practices unless trainees specifically wanted her help.

“You’re going home with me tonight, aren’t you?” Joohyun teases.

“Unfortunately.”

“Hey!”

It’s good to see Joohyun still trying her best to maintain the smile on her face despite what happened last week. She didn’t go into detail with Sana since Seungwan seemed to be talking about her own personal experiences but it doesn’t take a genius to figure out that something happened.

“Yes, I am... Miss Hirai seems to have something on tonight so I don’t want to disturb her.” Sana mumbles, resting her head against Joohyun’s shoulder. “At least we’ve finished our lyrics and songs so maybe we can relax for a bit and just talk. Let’s start with why you haven’t been talking to Miss Son at all.”

Joohyun’s smile quickly turns upside down at the mention of the woman. “Well, long story short, she confessed that my crush isn’t one-sided but basically said we probably won’t get together and she’s apparently not asking me to wait. I don’t know. She left before I could even say anything.”

“Oh, Unnie...”

The sympathy for Joohyun grows tenfold when Sana sees the tears threatening to spill from her eyes. Her relationship with Momo is only developing in the right direction – with some boundaries still in place – whilst her own friend is probably dealing with something not less than heartbreak. It might not be the most obvious to anyone who doesn’t know more than the bare surface, but Sana has seen the way their vocal coach looks at her friend. Sure, her eyes were filled with disdain and indifference at first but she saw first-hand how Seungwan’s attitude changed over time.

It's impossible for Seungwan to disregard those feelings.

“I’m still doing okay... at least, the lyrics are coming out very smoothly. If my love life doesn’t progress, at least I can still try to achieve my dreams.” Joohyun whispers, mind filled with the image of their vocal coach being so sentimental that night. Her sadness still proves as a source of inspiration, which’ll only improve her performance.

It might sound crazy to normal people but Joohyun is willing to wait for Seungwan to open up. She didn’t reject the idea of getting together in the future, only that she’s clearly not ready to get into one at the moment. Perhaps Seungwan is the right person, they’re just in the wrong time frame.

Sana interlaces their fingers together and gives the older woman’s hand a soft squeeze. “If you ever need to cry, Unnie, I’m always going to be here.”

What I really need... is answers.

Inside this sudden guest of wind,

Just like always we are walking side by side

Just like this, I won’t let go of your hand

Cause you’re the only

Yeah, you’re the only

“It sounds like a sad song.”

Joohyun hums in response, her eraser working nonstop with how many times she rewrites her own lyrics. “I guess it depends on how you interpret the lyrics. I think of it as a song that will give me hope and assurance.” She keeps her answer short since they’re still sitting with three other trainees at the table, but the snickering from Sana tells her she knows exactly what it’s referring to.

Drenched in fear

I couldn’t even move as I wished

I don’t even know how to breathe

I confess one by one and find myself

“I think the fact that you’re in Korea, writing Korean lyrics when it’s not even your native language is amazing, Sana. That alone should be an achievement.” Joohyun keeps nodding as she reads the lyrics.

It still makes Sana blush whenever people commend her for her Korean language skills; her effort to work hard to communicate pays off handsomely. She’s, however, more thankful for the fact that Joohyun doesn’t seem to catch onto the lyrics since she doesn’t say anything that suggests more.

“Sounds like I’m not the only one writing a song to dedicate to someone else.”

“Unnie!”

Unbeknownst to them, Momo is watching from outside the studio with the softest smile on her face. She’s been standing there for a good ten minutes or so but she wants to enjoy observing Sana from afar. Sure, they spend many hours together every other day but Sana beside her is vastly different from the Sana outside. Not to say her personality flips like a switch but Sana is always nervous, hardly daring to initiate any form of physical affection despite being forward about her feelings. She’s also twice as cautious whenever they’re not at the dorm or far away from the company, so to see Sana behaving freely is both saddening and relieving.

Watching Sana text someone whilst smiling to herself is a bit unnerving though, and Momo finds herself pouting at the fact.

Until her phone rings.

text message to THE hirai momo 🫦

of course

have a good day and night momoring

Sana smiling at her phone... that was for her?

It’s difficult to even describe how Momo’s heart just keeps skipping beats as she finds out for herself just how much Sana likes her. Her entire life, Mrs Hirai has always emphasized the goodness of being loved rather than to love. Perhaps growing up with parents who were only together due to an arranged marriage back then is a contributing factor to why Momo doesn’t acknowledge her feelings as love yet. Right now, her feelings for Sana are clearly lacking compared to Sana’s for her but it is a start. Everything they do feels so right, like a puzzle coming together.

Not that the company or production team will ever understand that.

“Miss Hirai! Do you mind helping me with dance routine?”

“Of course not. Let’s go, Yerim.”

Joohyun gives Sana a big nudge in the ribs when their dance coach finally makes her appearance, relishing the way Sana’s eyes grow wider and her fingers frantically combing through her locks. It’s still refreshing to see the younger one loses her cool because she’s always the same; this makes Joohyun yearn for someone to make her feel like that every day.

“Good afternoon, Miss Hirai!”

“Joohyun, Sana. I trust everything is going well with your song-writing.” Momo nods at them, gaze lingering on the latter just a little longer than she plans to. For the first time since they’ve met though, she can’t seem to read Sana’s expression. “If you need to see me before leaving, let me know.”

Usually, Sana’s smile never leaves her face because seeing Momo makes her day, but seeing the trainee cling to Momo’s arm is ticking her off. She’s well aware that they’re probably only in their dating phase with no official label but her jealousy is off the charts. Sana knows it’s partially due to Momo being unable to deny anyone, since it’s a huge part of her job – it really doesn’t help that the trainees are all beautiful. Insecurities are at work every day of her life and they shouldn’t because none of them are being cuddled or kissed by Momo whenever possible... but still.

Joohyun’s pencil doesn’t stop scribbling jumbled words and notes across her already-filled pages; she’s in the zone right now. Since she’s clearly not going to see Seungwan till the woman is ready, then she will give her assurance via other methods that cannot be denied.

When you’re ready to open up, I’ll be there waiting.

*

Dinner time is supposed to be relaxing and stress-free, since it’s the only period trainees get to do anything they want without feeling trapped in the studios. Of course, everyone thinks that way except Sana and Joohyun. They love being alone with the coaches because they get all the privacy possible and there’s more time to work on their craft. Joohyun literally drags Sana out occasionally because she doesn’t want them to be caught face if ever; call it best friend duties. The favour is rarely returned because Joohyun and Seungwan don’t have a single connection between them.

It definitely took its toll on Joohyun because she voluntarily went to the cafeteria alone.

“Why is my little baby sulking?”

“I’m not little.” Sana mumbles, rolling her eyes at the pair of arms around her waist. She can’t even pretend she doesn’t like being babied but this won’t expel her jealousy so easily. “Why are you here? Don’t you need to eat?”

Momo tightens her arms around Sana’s waist, nuzzling her nose into the latter’s neck with a whine. She might maintain a professional front at all times but it doesn’t mean she’s oblivious to Sana’s feelings; the latter isn’t good at hiding her expression when it comes to her anyway. “Don’t be jealous, Sana. I’m just trying to be a good dance coach; you know I’m here to help all the trainees achieve their dreams.”

When she feels Sana begin to relax in her arms, Momo finally heaves a huge sigh of relief. It’s not difficult to understand the reasoning behind Sana’s jealousy. If Momo were to be completely transparent, she might not even let it go so easily because she can be very jealous if she wants to be. Once their produce season is over and Sana’s done with the temporary group, Momo hopes she’s still willing to date her, but with an official label this time. By then, her own contract will be finished and Momo can make new bargains that align with her own beliefs before re-signing.

Time will tell if Sana and Momo are meant to be together, regardless of their professional status.

“Sorry, I’m just...”

“I know.” Momo pats her tummy gently, giggling when Sana tries to swat her hands away. “I think I’d be the same if the roles were reversed too. Also, Seungwan-unnie – well, Miss Son to you – wants to talk to me about something... I think it’s about her past so I have to be with her. She’s been so depressed.”

Sana turns to face Momo with a pout, trying not to overthink the feel of the woman’s hands around her waist. “I hope Miss Son is okay. If Joohyun-unnie looks so upset whenever I’m not watching, then I can only imagine how Miss Son must feel.”

The more time Momo spends with Sana, the harder she falls for the latter. She tries to care for anybody and everybody despite not knowing them well and Momo honestly expected her to jump to Joohyun’s defense. Yet here she is, proving Momo wrong for the nth time since they met.

“Keep working on your song, okay? I know you haven’t decided on what kind of instrumental you’re going to be using but the lyrics are already amazing on its own. I have faith in your abilities.”

With pink staining her cheeks, Sana bows her head with a soft mumble of gratitude.

“When do you think Miss Son is returning?”

“I’m not sure. I heard she took medical leave for this entire week.”

Joohyun looks down at her plate, poking around the unappetizing meal. She only came down to give Sana some privacy; just because she’s miserable doesn't mean they have to be. Although their conversation ended that way, Joohyun still hoped Seungwan would send her a text from time to time. There was definitely a glimmer of hope between the lines; Joohyun can be delusional but not to that extent. The only thing stopping her from making the first move is fear of rejection.

“What are you doing here alone?”

“I figured Sana needed help from you, Miss Hirai.” Joohyun tries not to show how envious she is, but that effort goes to naught soon enough.

“She’ll be opening up to me tonight… so I hope she does the same for you when she’s ready.” Momo starts off, careful not to cause more damage than salvation. “Just be patient with her, okay?”

This should be another sign, right?

Waiting for Seungwan is worth it.

*

“Let me get the food and we’ll settle in, okay?”

Momo’s running to the front door without even waiting for Seungwan’s answer, too eager to get her (free) supper. She didn’t ask for a treat in exchange for coming home to have a heart-to-heart talk but no one in their right mind turns down free food. Seungwan has been eating so little the past few days that it has become a cause for concern but it was also her idea to order both stew and braised pig trotters…

“Thank you for the food, Unnie!”

Seungwan’s still cozily wrapped up in her duvet, bringing the comforter with her as she moved from her bedroom to the living room. The significant difference is the smile on her face whilst she watches Momo eat to her heart’s delight.

“Eat some.” Momo quickly pushes a bowl towards Seungwan, glaring at the older woman when she’s about to deny. “You either eat or I’m leaving.”

Both women know it’s an empty threat but Seungwan complies nonetheless; take it as solid courage for what she’s about to say.

Throughout years of knowing and teaching alongside one another, Momo never once overstepped her boundaries and tried to stick her nose where it didn't belong. There were times Seungwan broke down in the privacy of her own room and came out with swollen eyes; or times where she was wailing in her sleep and Momo just slowly coaxed her back to sleep - not a single question was asked the following day. Instead, Momo just made her breakfast and pretended nothing happened the night before.

“You never questioned why I went on hiatus and stepped down as an idol…” Seungwan begins, putting down her spoon after barely two mouthfuls. “I’m thankful for that, but I also think I’m ready to talk about it.”

Glancing down at the older woman’s hands, Momo starts to worry when she sees how hard she’s clenching her fist.

“I… I was caught by Dispatch when I was dating… and they were going to release the pictures because my old company couldn’t afford to pay them off. I broke it off with her because I didn’t want her face blasted all over the news, but it didn’t go well… she eventually cut off contact with me and by the time I found the courage to reach out, she had already passed away due to a drug overdose.”

Momo’s jaw can’t seem to close as she listens, just shock after shock slamming all her expecta