I am not going to fail...

Yue 💜 recited the words in her head as the kiwitaxi wound it's way along the city street that led towards the north coastline of Incheon .. The snow that had fallen overnight had dusted, trees and bushes with a wintry layer of white that now sparkled under the bright early morning sunshine. It promised to be a perfect day.. perfect for those who aren't about to end their life dream.. 

She felt sicker that she'd ever felt in her life and the brief glimpse of sea in the distance increased the tension in her stomach until it felt as though she'd swallowed a loop of knotted rope. No amount of logical reasoning or deep breathing produced the desired feeling of calm and suddenly Yue wished she hadn't chosen to come in person. But what else could she have done when her unnie 💚 refused to respond to her online or any of her phone calls.. 

Chanty left her no choice.

Staring out of the window at a fimiliar landmarks, she admitted to herself that her unnie's silence had surprised her. It was so unlike her.  She was Filipino and Argentian decent after all, and Yue braced herself for an ongoing display of simmering volcanic chaos.. 

Chanty was immature yet determined. Someone who knew what she wanted from life and took it. 

Which just went to prove that her unnie hadn't wanted her..

Yue felt close and she swallowed hard, controlling her tears, aware that she was completely illogical. It wasn't as if she'd wanted her unnie to put up a fight. It would have made it so much harder to do what had to be done..

Yue curled her hands tightly over the edge of her seat. She wanted to tell the kiwitaxi driver to turn around and take her back to the station but she knew that she couldn't give in to that impulse. If she didn't do this now then she'd only have to do it later and she'd already put it off as long as possible.. 

It was time to finally move out of Korea to end their dream of living in this foreign land.. Finally leaving her unnie behind and going back to the US and continue her Ph D in visual arts.. 

She was so lost in thought that it took a moment for her to realize that the driver was speaking to her.

Yue: "I'm sorry ajjushi did you say something"

Driver: "Just wondering if you live Ugak-ro Mural Village.." 

Yue managed a polite smile . 

Yue: "No .. not anymore.. I'm moving"

Driver: "So ..."

He drove carefully down the road still white with snow.

Driver: "I expect you're home to celebrate the Holidays with your friends and family? Are you staying here long?"

Maybe no more friends.. no celebrations..

Yue: "It's just a short visit.."

Yue said in hesitation.. Maybe it was enough time to confront her unnie and say I'm moving out and then she would never finish their dream to live together and finish their mural piece together in Incheon ...

Her unnie would never know how she truly feel.. And if she would tell her then maybe she would never see Chanty again.. 

Driver: "Well keep an eye on the weather. Can you believe that it snowed again last night? I mean, when did we last have snow like this on the coast? When was it last this cold?"

He shook his head 

Driver: "Global warming, that's it is..Our entire climate gone bonkers. And there are severe storm forecast. Leave plenty of time or you'll find yourself stranded.."

Barely listening, Yue glanced out the window .. She'll be leaving Ugak-ro Mural Village even if it meant walking.. 

As the taxi turned into the main street her heart rate doubled , as if her body was instinctively bracing herself for conflict..

She slid down slightly in her seat and then frowned at her phone and sat up again.. What was she doing? Behaving like a runaway, not like a 25 year old artist with a promising career.