"There is something I wanna talk about Yunho," Jaejoong said and smiled in a weird way.

Yunho just looked very puzzled, cause he just got ready to go out with Jaejoong to catch dinner. "Something you have to talk about right now?"

"Yeah." Jaejoong nodded.

"What is it then? Did something happen?" Yunho asked, not knowing what this was all about.

"I want to break up with you."

Silence.

"...huh?" Yunho finally got out. "Say that again." He couldn't believe he heard right.

"I want to break up with you." Jaejoong said it again, clear and slow this time so Yunho would understand that he was serious about it.

"What the hell are you talking about?!" Yunho broke out, once again breaking the silence that had settled between them for a few moments. He looked like he was in shock and just kept staring at Jaejoong as if he wanted to bring him to confess it was all just a bad joke.

But Jaejoong just kept calmly looking at Yunho without another word.

"What is that bull?! Why?!"

"Yunho, you don't really like me."

"Uuuuh, pardon?!"

"And I was just a bit curious myself."

"Hmmm, but I don't see how that's related. So?"

"It's been two months already."

"..."

"Sooo? Since when are two months the deadline to a relationship? As far as I know there is no law saying it has to end after two months!"

"Where were you yesterday at lunchtime?"

"Lunchtime?" Yunho frowned and looked away, trying hard to remember. "Lunchtime?" he mumbled again. "I was with you at the cafeteria."

"After that. When you went to class?"

"I didn't go. Why? It's not the first time I skipped. But that is not a good enough reason to want to break up with me."

"Who were you with then? And where did you go?"

"Do I have to tell you that?!" Yunho started to get louder which indicated that he also got angrier. "What is that all about? You're suddenly telling me you want to break up with me and now you're bringing up this stuff!!" He riffled his hair. "I don’t understand at all!!"

'That's okay Yunho. Just keep getting angrier. When you're angry too you'll say you want to break up too,' Jaejoong though and tried to maintain a neutral expression though this whole affair was really painful for him. But Yunho just continued glaring at him and didn't say anything.
Jaejoong sighed.

"My class after lunch was cancelled so I decided to go shopping for a bit. I was walking towards a store I like when I saw you." Jaejoong struggled for words. "I saw you walking with another guy."

"Walking? That's it? So what's the deal? Why did that piss you off?"

"It didn't!"

'Oh yes it did. It upset me terribly.' But Jaejoong didn't say it out loud. "When you're getting yourself a new boyfriend then you no longer need me."

"So you want to break up with me?"

"Hmmm. Maybe you're not liking the fact that I am dumping you. So why don't you say the words instead?"

"That I want to break up?" Yunho's eyes were shooting daggers at Jaejoong right now, but all the other man did was nod.

"... I don't like sharing, okay. I am definitely not made for that kind of love or relationship. If you have found yoursef someone else then I think we should end this."

"Love? Us?" Yunho laughed. "Are you kidding me? You're the one that said I didn't like you. So does that mean you don’t like me? You mean there never was love here to begin with?"

"Hmm... I guess so. We started going out because..."

"I didn't know your reason, but I dated you because I like you..." Yunho's eyes scared the out of Jaejoong. He never saw the other being angry like that before. He was furious.

'But... whoooooa wait a second! Back up for a moment! What did Yunho just say?!'

"Who do you think you are to decide how I feel? Why did you just assume that the guy I was walking with is my new flame? You could have asked, you know! If it pissed you off you should have asked! If you're not sure about my feelings toward you then you should have asked! Don't just assume that you know me! You're absolutely clueless about how I feel!"

"But..."

"No but! You think you know everything, don't you?! Have you ever asked me about how I actually felt?! Why would I try lying to you? Did you think of me at all?! You're just being selfish, you know! Ask me! Just ask me who that guy was!"

"No!" Jaejoong screamed. "No way I'm asking! I don't want to ask!" Something was wrong. Oh so wrong. The world around him twisted and twirled... spiralling downwards. Something shattered- probably his heart- and the pain was just overflowing.

Even though he promised himself not to cry, due to the pain in his heart tears were now flooding out of his eyes and finding a way down his cheeks.

"NO!"

"Just shut the up and ASK ME!"

"WHY? I don't want to know about your new flame!"

"I never said I had one!" Yunho screamed back.

"You don't have to! Just... stop playing with me okay!?"

Yunho reached for Jaejoong’s jaw and made the other look into his eyes.

"You're crying right now. I guess that means you care for me. Right?" Yunho asked hopefully, but Jaejoong kept quiet. "Yesterday you only had with me because you were jealous! Just SPILL it! If you don’t love me then you wouldn't have been so passionate in the first place and you wouldn't be crying right now! Just tell me please!"

Jaejoong almost let it all go as he heard Yunho saying the last word. But no, he couldn't do that. He vowed to himself that he was never going to tell Yunho how he felt. So there was only one thing that really bothered him right now. 'Why? Why had Yunho said that?'

"SPEAK! NOW!"

"NO!"

"WHY NOT?"

"I... I c-can't..."

Jaejoong’s vision was now blurred by the amount of tears that were coming out of his eyes. And he gave up that vow to himself.

"I... I... if you dumped me, I think there is no way I could get over it. Without you there is nothing to live for. I really don't need to hear you're not serious about us! I don't wanna know, okay! I don't want to be boring. I just don't know what to do!"

This outburst shocked both Yunho and Jaejoong.

But Yunho recovered fast. Clenching his fist, his eyes started to fill with rage.

"I am NOT dumping you! I am not going away. I am not bored by you." And through gritted teeth he added, "That's it?! That is all you have to say?!"

He was waiting for a response from Jaejoong, but the other was just looking at him unbelievingly.

"You know I just told you I love you! Did you hear that? Did you even care to listen, you ?"

"You're lying!" Jaejoong shouted and then stopped listening.

He did not want to hear anymore. He did not want to listen to what he believed were lies. He did not want Yunho lying to him. "You're lying! It's all a big fat LIE!"

"How do you know?! How can you possibly know?! Last time I checked I was me and you were you! So you definitely have no idea what's going on in my mind. So why are you being so stubborn?"

And in a low voice he continued. "What have we been doing these past two months? I thought you understood me the whole time. I really believed you did. I thought you were so sweet, but I guess I was wrong. You're not really that innocent, right? Do you really have that little respect for me? Did you really believe that I did not care for you?!"

Jaejoong hesitated to answer Yunho's question but decided he could at least be honest. So he nodded. "But what you liked about me..."

"Is all of you, you idiot! But unfortunately it does not matter anymore. There is only one important question for me now, and that's whether you like me or not. I already told you I love you Jaejoong. So what about you? Do you love me?"

'I like you. No wait- that's not right. I love you. I love you so much that it hurts.'

"If you're not saying anything, then we can have it as you want it. We'll break up. If you're not having any faith in my love for you, then there is no point in staying together and I will tell you it's over. Cause what is the point? There is no point in dating someone like you. No matter how much you like them, it will never be enough. So I just quit. I give you 10 seconds to decide what you want. So think about it. If you're not telling me that you love me too within those ten seconds then it's over."

Yunho started counting.

"Ten." Jaejoong started panicking.

'Break up? With Yunho? Here? Now?'

"Nine."

'We would stop being together.'

"Eight."

'But... I like him. No, that's not right. I love him...'

"Seven."

'That's what I wanted. I don't want to be in pain anymore. I want it to stop hurting.'

"Six."

'When I just wait till he is finished counting, he will break up with me.

Yunho is going to leave me.'

"Five."

'But...'

"Four."

'I never really told him how I felt. I never once said that I love him. I like him so much.
And Yunho even said he loves me.’

"Three."

'Is this right? Can I do this?

Am I not going to regret it?'

"Two."

'I have to do it. I can't go on this way.'

"One."

"Z..."

"I LOVE YOU!" Jaejoong screamed.

His eyes still flooded with tears, and he decided that now that he said this it would not hurt to tell Yunho everything that had been bottled up inside of him.

"I like you. I love you. I love you so much that it sometimes physically hurts me, like when I saw you walking with that guy. My heart hurt so much I thought it would break. And while we had yesterday I was thinking you did it with him too. It was really horrible. Just thinking about it made me want to break something, so I thought we should break up. But... I liked you even though I thought you don't like me back. I loved you so much and then I saw you walking away with some other guy. So I thought..."

"You were scared, weren't you?" Yunho asked while pulling Jaejoong into an embrace. "Seriously, you are so thick-headed. Did you really consider not telling me anything? Were you really that scared? If you hadn't said anything then we would have had to really break up, silly. I am so glad you found your courage and finally spoke up."

"Yunho, are you even listening to what I said?"

"No, I did not listen at all, cause the moment you said you loved me too I knew everything would be okay. I knew you cared for me and just kept it to yourself. You know you can't do that forever. And you don't have to, cause I want to hear it. I want to hear my precious Boojae telling me he loves me over and over again."

Jaejoong was stunned. Not only by what Yunho just said but more by the gentle smile that appeared on his face and made his face glow right then. It was a smile he had never happened to see before. Full of feelings towards the man that he loved from the bottom of his heart. This smile meant so much. It meant everything.

"Are you getting it now?" Yunho asked and held his hand close to his heart. "This whole time we've been together, how could I possibly not be totally in love with you? As if I would get myself another boyfriend, or worse a girlfriend. Why would I want to look at anyone else but you?"

"... You're lying."

"That's not nice, not to mention it's definitely not y. Why would I lie? Why won't you believe me?"

"But... you've been with so many before. Guys and girls."

"Yeah, that's true. I slept with a lot. But did you know? I fell in love with this amazingly beautiful guy I met here at the agency. And to top it all it was love at first sight. It is really as simple as it sounds. The moment I met you, I lost something. My heart. Cause I instantly fell in love with you. I tried really hard to ignore it, but as you already know I was unable to date anyone else. There was only one person I really wanted to be with: YOU. So I dumped them all and stopped dating. And the day I asked you, I was so freaked out because I was afraid you'd say no. And I seriously thought from the beginning that, maybe, we could... And as you said you'd sleep with me I was shocked and terrified. And remembering that day, the rumours weren't true, right?" Yunho cocked his head to emphasize his question and entwined his fingers with Jaejoong’s. "I was your first, wasn't I?”

"H-how'd you know?" Jaejoong asked.

"Humpf. You were so freaking tight as I tried entering you. And it looked like it really hurt you. You did not look the slightest way as if you were enjoying yourself. Do you have any idea how I felt? "

"You were annoyed?"

"Moron! Sometimes you're a total idiot, you know!" He looked really disappointed as he said this. And it wasn't really his face that made it clear for Jaejoong but Yunho's body itself that suddenly lost all its tension and slouched together. But he had no idea what to do about it.

"You know Jae, when you're together with someone you really like and they are enjoying themselves, that makes you happy. Because it is the best feeling in the world to know that you're able to let the other forget everything, to make them feel good. But even though our first time was painful for you, I thought that you might really love me. Otherwise you wouldn't have been able to stand the pain. So was I wrong? Did you like me? Even then?"

"Do I have to say it?" Jaejoong felt so embarrassed now that he hid his face by burying it in Yunho's chest. "Everything would have been over if I had said anything that time. Did you have to go out with me? Did you have to make me your lover?"

"What do you intend to say?"

Yunho softly caressed Jaejoong by his hair, his hand spending the comfortable warmth it always had- but Jaejoong had not understood that warmth entirely. "Okay. You know I hardly attend classes at all, right? I skip an awful lot but not once have I been absent from a class I attend together with you. And even if we don't have any class together the whole day I am still waiting at the cafeteria at lunchtime. Why do you think I am doing this? I can promise you that the awful and disgusting coffee they sell is not the reason."

'He's saying the truth,' Jaejoong thought. He could not remember a single day (since they met) when they hadn't met at the cafeteria. He had gotten so used to spending his lunch break with Yunho that he did not notice it- notice the fact that Yunho had been there every day. For him. To see him.

"Did I have to be your lover? Damn. I was the one who wanted it that way!"

"... But... someone like me needs time to realise things. I didn't understand what you felt and topped everything off by even hurting you. So how can you be okay with that??"

"Yes, you did hurt me, but you're also always here and you're always gentle. With you around I can relax, no matter what happened. You accepted me for who I am, even my bad parts cannot scare you away though you already saw most of them. And you still like me, don't you?" Yunho placed his hands around Jaejoong's face and softly forced the other to look at him. "And that's exactly why I want you. So tell me. Tell me now, please."

"I love you."

As the words were out, tears started to bubble up again. It seemed as if all the tears he had kept to himself for the past months, all the tears he never cried had to make their way out now.

"I like you and I love you. So please, let's be lovers."

"Of course! I feel exactly the same."

"And... I am going to be the only one, right?"

"Naturally. Don't worry. I only love you.'"

"Only want me?"

"I am only going to want you."

"You're not going to cheat?"

"Never! I promise I will only get a hard-on for you!"

"... Forever? It is going to be like this forever?" The feelings that had been kept inside, carefully locked away, now came bubbling up together with the held in tears. Yunho wiped the tears away carefully.

"You can be as selfish as you want, or as jealous as you want. I don't care. I just want all of you. Every aspect of you fascinates me. Those words, will you say them again?"

"...I love you..." Jaejoong whispered, still feeling a bit insecure and embarrassed. But these feelings faded away the second Yunho kissed him. It was a soft kiss, meant to soothe his nerves. But though their lips barely touched, the sensation sent shivers down his spine.

"I like you. I love you." And every time Jaejoong said those words Yunho rewarded him with a kiss. At first they were gentle but they were growing more and more passionate after a short while.

"So you love me and I love you. Shouldn't we make love then and show the heavens how much we love each other?"

"We don't need to show heaven. Cause right here it already is heaven." Jaejoong slowly opened his eyes again after he received Yunho's last kisses on his closed lids. "As long as I can be with you and stay in your arms I am in heaven."

Yunho laughed softly. "You're really special! You're always so sweet and it never fails to make me crazy about you!" As he noticed Jaejoong’s surprised expression he added, "I bet you didn't know that!" He winked at his lover and put him onto his arms. And while carrying him bridal style he said, "Okay princess, we're off to the bed now."

Jaejoong clung on him as if his life depended on it, his fingers through the soft hair at Yunho's neck, kissing the sensitive spot right underneath his ear. Yunho's face was glowing from sheer happiness.

"Oh and who the hell was that guy?" Jaejoong couldn't help but ask as he was laid down on the soft mattress and his curiosity getting the best of him.

"My ex-boyfriend from high school."

Jaejoong didn't expect this answer and therefore was surprised by the stinging pain around the region his heart was located. He looked at Yunho who was slowly getting rid of his clothes, but this time he did not hide the pain in his eyes.

"Did you...?"

"No! We did not! I already told you so. Please believe me!"

"But you looked so happy together."

"It's been ages since we've seen each other. It was just nice to talk to him."

"But you looked extremely happy. Did you love him?"

"Hmmm.... loved him? Probably. But that's been long ago. It was just nice talking with him and to hear how he was doing."

"Why did you two meet? Was it coincidentally?"

"Stupid!" Yunho said grinning. "Are you worried?"

"No. No I am not worried. I am jealous as hell! And how could I not see you walking with someone else!"

"Awww that's so utterly cute! I never imagined it would make me so happy to know the person I loved is jealous. Give me more of that!"

"No way! You're really mean to me. You already know how I feel!"

"Okay, okay!" Yunho gave in. "I ran into him coincidentally on my way out. I really did not expect to see him here so I was very surprised and we started talking while walking and yeah that's pretty much it."

"Really?"

"Though I guess we're going to meet again."

"I hate you!" Jaejoong reached for the pillow nearest to him and started beating Yunho repeatedly until the other begged for mercy.

"Sooo? You don't want me to meet him again?"

"Of course I don't want that! And how can you state it so calmly?!"Jaejoong screamed, once again at the edge of tears. Yunho sighed.

"I was just teasing you, okay. Please calm down. Actually I hope we can meet Junsu together the next time, cause I guess meeting him can't be avoided. He's joining the company and will be joining us in classes and training. So please calm down. I won't be meeting him alone and I am definitely not going to do anything that could hurt you again. Do you believe me?"

"I want to. I really really want to, but..."

"Okay then let me tell you something else. You remember that guy Yoochun, who's also in our classes?" Yunho asked and continued as he saw Jaejoong nodding. "Well apparently he and Junsu are a couple."

The moment Jaejoong registered those words fully he reached again for the pillow and threw it at Yunho... hard.

"You! You jerk! You knew, you already knew and you didn't tell me even though I was so upset. You are so mean!"

"But baby it's just too y when you are jealous! I really couldn't resist. And besides I want you to get jealous over me! That way I know you're all mine! And that's also the reason you shouldn't jump to conclusions. You're still not really believing me, are you?"

"But... but you didn't say anything about meeting him!"

"I wanted to, though! That night I wanted to tell you about him and that he's going to join the agency, but you were behaving like a maniac! I seriously wondered what happened and if I had known then that your behaviour was caused by jealousy, I could have enjoyed it even more than I already have. Anyway can we stop arguing now? I am thoroughly !"

Yunho did not need to mention that cause the evidence was right in front of Jaejoong.

"So now that everything is settled and you said so many sweet things, plus you're all in front of me, I really want to take you. But before we start something, is there anything else you want to know?"

"Hmmm... Do you love me more than you did him?" Yunho had to hold his breath and carefully let it out again in order to not jump Jaejoong right this instant.

"Woooow, so y," he managed to say with clenched teeth. "When I tell you, are you going to let me you?"

Jaejoong’s breath hitched at the last words, but he wanted to know and more importantly he wanted to feel Yunho, so he nodded and waited with anticipation what would happen now.
Yunho crawled onto the bed the moment he saw Jaejoong nod. His hand cupping his lover's cheek, he said, "Nothing! And I repeat- nothing can compare to you! I love you the most!"

As he heard that Jaejoong again felt tears dwelling up behind his eyes, but this time they were tears of happiness.

"... Thank you," he whispered. "I love you too. You're definitely my number one..." his voice got lower and lower with every spoken syllable because of Yunho planting a path of kisses down his body.

<<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>><<<>>>

The next day before lunchtime Jaejoong was startled as someone he hardly knew approached him and asked "Are you really dating Jung Yunho?"

"Who said that?" He instantly asked back and silently wondered who could have spread the word again. He was positive that it couldn't be Yunho, cause he doubted that the other was already awake after last night.

"Well.. uhmmm..." the other guy stuttered, "eehm I mean everyone in the cafeteria was talking..." The words faded away as Jaejoong hastily mumbled a 'thank you' and hurried into the cafeteria. Now he was sure that against all odds Yunho was the one who started this. And surprisingly rather than being annoyed he was moved.

So the moment he entered the cafeteria everyone went quiet as they saw him making his way to the table he usually sat at during lunchtime. As he was near enough that the other could hear him he asked, "Did you hear any interesting rumours lately?"

Yunho turned around when he heard his voice and grinned.

"Now that you mention it, I just heard a very interesting one."

"Really? What was it about?"

"It's about us. Something about the two of us dating and stuff. But I heard similar things a few times before. They probably should just leave it alone, hm?"

It struck Jaejoong as lightning as he heard Yunho saying this. Yunho was insecure. He wanted to make sure that everyone knew Jaejoong was his.

Before Jaejoong had kept it quiet because he was afraid of Yunho breaking up with him any time. But now he understood. He understood Yunho's intention. The torment of always being afraid.

"Yeah they really should leave that issue alone," Jaejoong answered smiling and brought his face closer to Yunho's.

"So?"

"Wasn't it this?" And with that Jaejoong closed the distance between them and kissed Yunho. The second their lips met the cafeteria exploded in an uproar of noise. Nobody expected that to happen.

Jaejoong moved slightly away and looked at Yunho. A warm smile made its way on his lips as he saw Yunho's expression. The man he loved was looking at him awestruck and surprised!

The End