[CONTENTID1]CHAPTER 05[/CONTENTID1] [CONTENTID2]FIFTH SECOND[/CONTENTID2]

[CONTENTID3]

As the chaos unfolds, my mind spins out of control.

I’m going to die is the first thought that it produces, naturally. The camera that the police found hidden in the floor lamp in the corner might have been livestreaming, and someone out there might have recorded the whole thing already. There might have been a camera in Baekhyun’s car too. And all those girls at the Mondrian Hotel…

, how many people actually do this at hotels? How many people have bugged a Mulya hotel room and gotten away with it? How can women know if a hotel room has been—

“Get your hands off me!” Baekhyun’s voice snaps, hauling me back to the present. I blink and see him wrestling the two officers who are trying to walk him to the door, his shirt haphazardly buttoned, while Jongin stands in the corner being held back by another officer.

“Move it!”

I watch, paralyzed, as he passes me with an unapologetic glare. “Well,” he sneers, the malice so foreign on his handsome face, “at least you enjoyed yourself, didn’t you?”

The police officer behind him shoves him roughly. “Keep walking!”

But Baekhyun doesn’t listen. “Maybe you should watch it,” he continues, “and hear how weird you sound during .”

. Every single hair on my body stands, and my chest feels white-hot with rage. I want to slap him and cuss him to oblivion, but right now, I can’t even move my lips. I don’t even know how to express how humiliated I feel.

Suddenly, Jongin lurches. He moves as if he’s going to punch Baekhyun down again, but the officer holding his arm moves quicker.

“Enough!” he shouts, blocking Jongin with his body. “Take Mr. Byun to the police station now. Mr. Kim, we also need Ms. Seo to come to the station tomorrow morning at the latest.”  

“Understood, Sir.” Jongin’s teeth are clenched. “Please look at the files I’ve sent and make sure you find out everything else this person has done.”

I hear Baekhyun yelling in protest, demanding to know what files Jongin sent. An officer yells at him to shut up, and with what sounds like one final shove, Baekhyun’s finally out the door. I lie frozen on the bed, the covers still pulled up to my chin, unsure of what just happened and what happens next.

“Oh my God,” I whisper to myself, still reeling. “Oh my God, what the …”

Jongin immediately approaches the bed. “Ms. Seo… I’m so, so sorry for not finding out earlier—”

I instantly shake my head. Why is this man apologizing? The one who should have just cussed me to hell and back. “Jongin, why are you apologizing? Seriously, none of this is on you—it’s more on myself, if anything, I let him—”

“It’s not on you either!” Jongin interrupts, his voice angry again. I look at him, mildly surprised by how livid he sounds. “How could this ever be your fault? This is on him, that disgusting piece of , I swear I could’ve ki—”

But just then, there’s another loud knock on the door. Two officers re-enter without waiting. “Excuse me, we need to check the room for any other hidden devices.”

Instinctively, I tighten my grip around my bedsheets. What the hell am I supposed to do now? Lie here while they poke around?

“Is it possible to do that after Ms. Seo gets dressed?” Jongin asks, still standing beside me.

The officer looks doubtful. “I do apologize for this, but if we haven’t confirmed that there are no other cameras anywhere in this room, then…”

A small part of me dies. He’s right… what if there are more cameras? My eyes jump from one piece of furniture to another. Everything looks suspicious now.

“I understand how uncomfortable this is for you, Ms. Seo,” the officer adds, looking at me before quickly averting his gaze again. “But in these situations, we often find a second camera set up in the bathroom in over 50% of the cases—”

“I’ll change in the corner and turn all the lights off,” I hear myself say, finding the strength and solution from God knows where. “I want to get out of this room as soon as I can.”

I am not going to lie before a pair of young, hotblooded, male police, and I want to go home ASAP and scrub every single trace of Baekhyun off my skin.

The officers oblige, but for some reason, Jongin starts walking too. “Jongin,” I call so quickly I surprise even myself, “stay.”

Jongin clears his throat, looking a little flustered. “I was just going to turn off the lights, Ms. Seo.”

Oh. Oops. I struggle to keep my face straight. “I still need to find my clothes.”

“Oh, right. Of course.” Is it just my eyes or are his cheeks tinted red? As I start to sit up, he quickly turns away. “I’ll close the curtains to prevent any reflections.”

Why can’t all men be like him?

With his back turned to me, I slide off the bed, wearing the crisp white duvet around me like an enormous bath towel that falls all the way to the floor. A painful wave of embarrassment comes back as soon as I catch sight of all my clothes on the floor.

, an entire police team saw my lingerie. Jongin saw my lingerie.

the realization and a deep breath up, I first gather my dress, then the strapless balconette bra I wore underneath it, then—

I pause. Where’s my thong?

I look around wildly, probably looking like a squirrel searching madly for its precious acorn. Seriously, where the hell is my—

“Oh crap,” I whisper to myself, realizing that the black, lacy piece of garment is lying a few inches away from Jongin’s polished black shoe.

“Is everything okay?” he asks, turning around.

Our eyes meet, and immediately, heat seeps into my cheeks, my neck, and my entire chest. For some reason, I feel more vulnerable standing clothed in a duvet in front of Jongin than when I was under Baekhyun. Maybe because I’m actually buck in front of my bodyguard—which is not the typical state I encounter him in. Baekhyun was just a casual fling after all, but Jongin…

Jongin is Jongin. The mysterious and unreadable staple in my day-to-day. God I wish I could tell what he’s thinking. I know this isn’t the appropriate time to be thinking this, and I know he’s seen my shoulders before, but… me in a duvet?

Does it make his air as electric as mine feels?

“Um, yeah,” I mumble, finally pulling my gaze away. “It’s just that—” I point wordlessly at the racy underwear lying near his feet, too embarrassed to put this situation in words.

“Oh,” is the only thing he says, and for a second, he looks like he’s caught between bending down to help me get it and jumping away. “Um—”

“I’ll get it!!” I squeak, shimmying past him in my duvet dress. I try not to think about how much of my bare shoulders and back he can see as I bend down because come on, Iseul, he’s seen you in a lot of daring party dresses—this one isn’t any different!

Scrunching it up into a little ball, I quickly shuffle to the corner of the room without making eye contact again with Jongin. “Okay. Can you turn off the lights?”

“Yes.” He starts walking towards the light switch beside the door again. “I’ll wait beside the switch, so whenever you’re done, just let me know.”

“Okay.” I can’t see him anymore from where I’m standing, but I hear him do a short countdown. And then the room goes dark.

It’s pitch black and entirely quiet—like being in an actual void. Without waiting for my eyes to adjust, I start to get to work, fumbling with my hands and muscle memory to get dressed.

What if there’s a night vision camera…

God shut up brain, shut the up. It’s this total, eerie silence and darkness I swear—it’s freaking me out.

But now that the thought’s there, I can’t seem to get it out. I race to pull on my thong, but my haste only makes me stumble. , , . I need to get out of here. There could be a night vision camera, just like there could be one in the bathroom, and in Baekhyun’s car—

“Jongin?” I suddenly hear my own voice call, much to my surprise. I didn’t mean to say it—it just… it just came out.

Just like when I was in the ambulance, I realize. Just being able to hear my bodyguard’s voice and knowing that I have him with me is oddly reassuring.

“Yes? Do you need the lights?”

“No, no, not yet,” I reply as I try to clip on my bra. For some reason, these clasps are trickier in the dark. “Um, I just… I’m just wondering, like… you don’t think there’ll be any night vision cameras, do you?”

Jongin is silent for a bit. “Mr. Byun has never used one in any of the past footage we found,” he finally answers, concern evident in his voice. “How are you doing? Are you standing in the corner facing the wall as the officer suggested? Do you want me to…”

“What?” I prompt. It sounds like he’s searching for an idea, but I need to keep hearing him talk.

“I can stand behind you with a towel held out, if you want. Just to be extra safe. I’ll close my eyes, and I promise I can’t see a thing in this darkness—”

“It’s fine, I’m nearly done anyway,” I mumble, pulling my dress up. Something he said raises another question that I’m actually dying to ask.

When he said past footage…

“Jongin?” I call again, giving in.

“Yes?”

I hesitate. How do I even ask this question?

“When you said past footage… Um, obviously I want to hear about how you found everything in detail later, but when you said past footage… do you mean… you mean videos, right?”

His answer comes as slowly as my question. “Yes.”

“Did you see them?”

Silence. Either Jongin doesn’t understand the question, or doesn’t want to answer.

“I mean, did you actually see the clips? Were they livestreaming somewhere or anything? Or do you just know that they exist?” I rephrase slowly, zipping up my dress. “I’m just…”

, how do I get through the next few words in one piece? Was it a bad idea to ask this? I’m clearly making both myself and him uncomfortable, but this is something I have to know because… because… I need to know if he saw me!

“I’m guessing you had to watch at least a few seconds of them to confirm what is actually being recorded, so… I’m wondering if… you know, when you realized what was happening to me… did you...”

I squeeze my eyes shut. Okay, I can’t do this. The curiosity will kill me, but asking the question is going to choke me first. But the thing is I need to know if he’s seen any footage of me, because if he has… I don’t know if I can face him—

“I think I understand the question,” he replies, quiet voice cutting through the dark. “Do you me to answer, Ms. Seo?”

My heart feels absolutely manic in my ribcage, and I feel like I could puke. I’ve presented in front of angel investors, CEOs, and legendary professors at Harvard, but I’ve never felt as nervous as I do now—talking to my bodyguard in the dark.

What the hell is Jongin doing to me?

I think about it for a good minute, weighing the costs and benefits. It’s really only a question of whether satisfying my curiosity at the cost of becoming extremely awkward with my bodyguard is worth it if he answers yes. I’m already awkward with him, so what if we get impossibly awkward and he decides to quit—

“No,” I say. It suddenly becomes the easiest thing in the world, deciding. “Never mind.”

Biting my lip and trying to ignore the painful, sinking feeling in my stomach, I bury my head in my hands. this. everything. I’m dying to know, but I can’t bring myself to ask even though the curiosity could also kill me.

“Alright,” he answers. His voice is gentle and kind and it halts my dark spiral. For a second, I forget he’s still there. “But just for your peace of mind, it wasn’t livestreaming anywhere, Ms. Seo. I’ve made sure of that.”

Did he just answer my question?

If he can say that it wasn’t livestreaming, then did he actually see the footage, or was there some technical indicator on some sort of equipment that would show it wasn’t? , how did he even find out anyway? Did he tap into the camera, did he just hear the sound recording, or—

At the thought of sound, all the hair on my body stands and I physically wince. Baekhyun said I sound weird. Baekhyun said I sound weird during . What was I like tonight? Have I always sounded weird? And so did…

Did Jongin actually hear what I sounded like? Did he only see the footage, or did he—

Oh . I’m spiraling. I can’t stop.

Throughout the whole journey home, these questions rotate in my mind endlessly, without remedy, because the worst part is that I still can’t bring myself to ask them.

“What time are you planning to go to the police station tomorrow, Ms. Seo?” Jongin asks as we arrive in front of my penthouse.

I look blankly at the spotless white door. “I… I don’t know. 8?”

“Alright then. I’ll be here at 8,” he nods. He stands in front of my door, waiting for me to disappear behind it, but I don’t move. I stand there, my hand on the handle, still reeling with questions.

“Goodnight…?” he says, but it comes out like a question.

I bite my lip. “You don’t think… you don’t think anyone would’ve somehow set something up in my home, do you?”

Jongin’s expression immediately turns serious. “Have you brought any of your dates back here?” he asks sharply. “Have you ever received any gifts from them?”

“I don’t,” I quickly reply. “And no, I mostly just get flowers, all of which I’ve thrown out already. But still, I can’t help but feel a little paranoid…”

There’s something in Jongin’s eyes that I can’t quite put my finger on, and for a moment, he looks as if he’s about to say something. But then he decides against it, and when he finally opens his mouth again, what comes out is “I can do a quick check if you want.”

I find myself nodding eagerly at the offer, immensely relieved at the prospect of having company for a few additional minutes. “Yeah, I think that would really help bring some peace of mind.”

Also, I just… I don’t really want to be alone tonight.

So that’s how I end up letting Jongin into my home. He’s come inside a lot to help me bring my shopping bags in and for other everyday purposes, so he finds his way around easily. Once inside, he immediately starts poking at my lamps and furniture, running his hands along every surface and crevice to make sure nothing hidden is attached anywhere.

“Looks clean,” he finally says, dusting his hands. “And since you’re on a really high floor, we shouldn’t have to worry about peeping Toms either.”

“Right, yes.” Crap, I didn’t even think about peeping Toms. “Alright then. Thank you.”

Jongin looks at me. “Is there anything else that you need?”

In truth, there are so many. I want answers, I want retribution, I want a good long shower, and I want trustworthy company tonight. But it wouldn’t make sense to say any of these things now, would it?

“No,” I finally answer, eyes cast to the floor. That’s how I got to walk him to my door instead.

He steps outside and turns around, looking at me with those unreadable eyes once again. His jaw tightens ever so slightly when our eyes meet, and for some reason, that makes my stupid heart flip. “Goodnight, Ms. Seo,” he says for the second time that night. “You’re safe now, so please rest well.”

I nod, suddenly too exhausted to say anything. Offering him a weak smile, I begin to close the door. The last thing I see through the little gap between the doorframe is his eyes, still watching mine.

Later that night, I emerge from the shower a little more recovered from my mental breakdown. I proceed to spend an hour looking up other molka cases and relevant laws, preparing myself before tomorrow’s police station visit, and before I know it, my phone tells me it’s 1.40 in the morning already.

With a yawn, I finally retreat to my enormous bed, the legal stuff I’ve just read still running laps in my brain. This is fine, I tell myself for the hundredth time that night. It wasn’t livestreaming anywhere, and both Baekhyun and the footage are in police custody now. Also, I’m rich enough for a good lawyer. I can afford to make sure Byun Baekhyun gets as many charges as he could possibly deserve.

So I should be able to sleep. I shouldn’t be too worried about this anymore because I’ve done everything I could. So why can’t I?

I toss and turn restlessly. The more I tell myself not to worry, the more questions start to return. Has this ever happened to me before? What about in public restrooms? What about in Mulya hotel rooms? How did Jongin find out Baekhyun was recording me? Did Jongin see it, did Jongin see it, did. Jongin. See. It?!

I flip over and scream into my pillow. I just want to sleep!!

It’s 2 AM. I groan, staring at all the 7 AM alarms on my phone in despair. I don’t even have melatonin pills because I’ve never been unable to sleep. What the hell am I supposed to do now?

Idly swiping through my phone, I come across my recent call history and realize that I have 4 missed calls from Jongin. Huh? When was this? Was it when he first realized Baekhyun might be recording me?

My thumb hovers over his contact name. I’m only one loose nerve away from calling him this late.

If I do, maybe I’ll be able to sleep. Maybe I’ll get answers—at least some of the answers I need to calm my mind. Maybe I just need to talk about what’s in my head with someone, right? I can’t talk to my parents about this yet and I don’t have the energy to call up a friend and explain everything from the start, so naturally… Jongin…

Without even realizing it, I’ve pressed call already.

The first beep of the ringback tone makes me realize what I’ve done. Suddenly I’m more awake than ever, and I lie there staring at my screen wondering if Jongin will answer. But then reality hits—and I feel like a complete fool for even thinking of calling my bodyguard at two in the morning. He’s not going to pick up, Iseul, It’s almost 2.30 AM by now—he’s definitely asleep.

So I hang up. I throw my stupid phone back onto the bedside table and pull the covers above my head, wondering how I could’ve been so stupid. Why the hell did I do that? What am I even going to say tomorrow morning—

Suddenly, something beside me starts vibrating.

“AH!” I yelp, quickly kicking my comforter away. , , it’s my phone. I scramble over to check who’s calling and nearly throw up. Oh no. Oh no, oh no, oh no. It’s Jongin. Why is he calling me? Why is he awake? Why did he have to call back? Now what am I supposed to say?!

It did occur to me that if I really didn’t want to talk to him, I could’ve just ignored the call. But I don’t. The 2 AM fog in my brain clouds all my rational decision-making skills, and I find myself picking up.

“Hello?” I say like a dumb who didn’t just try to call him.

“You called me,” he replies instantly. “What’s wrong? Is everything okay?”

For a moment, I’m rendered speechless by a violent twist in my stomach. Oh… my… god. Is this what he sounds like when he’s half asleep?

Hoarse and throaty and oh so ing hot?

I swallow and mentally scream at my ovaries to calm down. What the , Iseul. You seriously cannot be thirsting right now. “H-Hi,” is the first idiot response I manage to give. “Um, I mean, yes, I did. It was a mistake, sorry,” I add quickly. “I was just going through my phone and accidentally pressed on your name in my call history. I only saw your missed calls two minutes ago, sorry.”

“Oh,” he says. It sounds like he’s stifling a yawn or a stretch and for some stupid reason I don’t even want to try to understand right now, it makes my toes curl. , , . Calling Jongin at this ungodly hour is a much worse idea than I’d ever thought it would be.

“So you’re okay?” When he speaks up again, his voice is noticeably clearer and more alert. Nooo no no, give me y sleepy-voiced Jongin back!!

“Yeah.”

That should’ve been the end of it. Either one of us could have been the one to say ‘Okay then, goodnight’ and hang up, and it would’ve been completely understandable and expected.

But it doesn’t happen. I don’t know why but I lay there clutching my phone, straining my ears to hear him breathe. Come on, I find myself thinking. Say something, even if it’s a goodnight…

Because for reasons beyond my understanding, he doesn’t hang up either.

“Can’t sleep?” he finally asks, in a voice so soft I fully thought I imagined it.

“Yeah,” I bite my lip. “I’m sorry, you were sleeping, weren’t you?”

“It’s not a big deal. I do it every night.”

Is he cracking a joke? Well, it’s working. I chuckle lightly and a tiny bit of my anxiety fades. “You must be a light sleeper.”

“Comes with the job,” he answers. It sounds like his phone is squished between something and for a second, I imagine him lying on his side, phone under his cheek. “What about you? Do you normally have trouble sleeping, or…”

“No,” I sigh. “I just couldn’t sleep after what happened today.”

“Yeah.” Jongin is silent for a bit. “Do you… um, is there anything you want to talk about?”

I consider it for a moment. “No. No, no, it’s fine… we’re going to the station in the morning anyway. You should sleep.”

“Are you going to?”

I pause. “I’m going to try…” I say in a voice that doesn’t sound convincing at all, even to my ears.

“Is it still bothering you? What you wanted to ask before?” Jongin’s intuition is dead-on as always—something that I should be used to by now but still get surprised by every time.  

“Yeah,” I admit, gnawing on my lip. “I just… I don’t know how to ask you…”

Another pause, and something tells me Jongin is also