Frustrating Little Feelings

Chp. 04

It's another day and once again, I had another dreamed last night.

What's up with all these weird dreams?

First it was that white space and melody, then last night I was inside a little girl's body. Who is that girl anyway and what was she doing on the meadow alone?

Shaking my head at the odd dreams, I get up and wash to start the new day. The first class we have today is with Trainer Jung and we had been instructed to gather on the field.

Hayeon and I head over to the field and see the rest of the class grouping together at the field, most gather in their own group. I spot Jungwoo, who is already looking at me near the bleachers. He's with Haechan, Seungkwan and Dokyeom. At first it was just a stare before he pulls up a smile and waves his hand. Haechan is next to him and is looking at me as well before he too smiles. Soon, all four of them are looking at the both of us.

Hayeon, upon seeing them, decide to go over to them. “Hey guys!” Hayeon greets them brightly, waving her hand. “What do you guys think we’ll be doing today”

Dokyeom shrugs, "Cardio I think, maybe like jogging or running" he says, gaining a groan from Hayeon and a snicker from Haechan before Dokyeom turns to me, giving me a wide smile and a hand, "Hi! We haven't introduced ourselves yet. My name is Dokyeom"

"Ahri, nice to meet you" I bow my head, holding his hand and shaking it. Then, it is Seungkwan who holds out his hand and we shake hands too.

"Seungkwan" he bows, smiling then nods at Dokyeom. "We want to introduce ourselves way earlier than this but Hayeon's been stealing you all the time"

"Hey, she's my seatmate" Hayeon retorts, having her hands on her hips. "I have all the rights to steal her"

Haechan scoffs, "That is not rights, that's called selfish, Yeon-ah"

Hayeon scoffs, raising her chin high to Haechan. "Well, to me it is. The seat next to me was empty and I didn't have a friend to gossip to"

Haechan snickers, yet he looks amused. "Gossip about what? Hot guys?"

Dokyeom, Seungkwan, Jungwoo and me just stand there, watching their interaction.

Hayeon shrugs, "Yeah, gossip about hot guys is a good topic," Haechan rolls his eyes. The girl seems to think of something and her eyes go wide in excitement afterwards. curves up, "And by the way, me and Ahri met the seniors yesterday"

"Seniors?" Seungkwan adds in, "Which ones? Hayeon-ah, we have a lot of seniors"

"I meant those seniors. Those royals!"

At the mention of royals, all the boys except for Jungwoo mouthing 'ah' in realization. Jungwoo frowning confusedly.

Hayeon continues to squeal, "We met them up close with the rest of them and it was so embarrassing but they're so handsome!"

I shake my head at her, amused. I didn't think our encounter with those seniors would mean much to her, more so for her to actually tell anyone else like some hot gossip.

Jungwoo glance at me, his face shows indifference but I can still tell he’s confused. "What royals?" he asks me, blinking his eyes but it is Hayeon and Haechan (occassionally Seungkwan as well) who took the position of explaining. And so, here we are standing on the field waiting for Trainer Jung to arrive while discussing over the seniors which seems like a really big topic for them.

It's very amusing

I still don't get the enthusiasms about those seniors but maybe because I don't know them. I only met them once or twice and they all look like normal seniors to me, apart from having strong auras but they still look normal. Well, maybe except for that guy.

Black hair, slanted hard eyes, fair skin, pink lips--

I mentally shake my head, why would I be observing his lips?

Then my mind goes over his outfit yesterday. He wore black jeans and a black shirt with the shirt cling to his figure nicely around his broad shoulders--

Wait, no no

I shake my head

"Ahri? You're ok?"

I snap out of my head up to look at Jungwoo when he questioned. Quickly I shake my head again, "No, no, it's nothing. I was just--nevermind, it's just nothing" I say, trying to smile it out. He raises his eyebrows, looking dubious but before he could voice out more, a loud whistle interrupts us.

"Alright, class! We are going to do cardio today and now move your butts! Run eight laps around the field!" Trainer Jung hollered at us and a lot of very audible groans echoing around the field. Very reluctant and whining students are slowly moving and start to run around the field as instructed. I glance at Trainer Jung before I start and I spot a tiny amused smile on him.

🌻🌻🌻

"You guys are terrible"

Trainer Jung lets out, his hands on his hips as he looks over at us. We had just finished our class, mostly filled with cardio with running, push ups, squads. Almost everyone passed out on the grass when they heard the bell.

I chuckle quietly to myself, catching my breath after the hard exercises. Hayeon is laying on the grass too, alongside the four boys. I stay standing next to them.

"That was only a little bit of cardio, guys. We will have more cardio class for the next classes" Trainer Jung continues,

A chorus of groans and whines coming out from the students.

"You all need to have stamina and endurance if you want to fight so quit your whining!" Our trainer continues on even with the protests from his students. "So, continue practicing and exercising even if you're not in class because it's good for your body"

I merely nod cause it's true and because his words remind me a lot of dad. He's active, he was a police back then before he passed away. He always made me go exercise with him whenever he had time.

Trainer Jung resumes his talk and advises before he dismissed the class. Hayeon stretches, moving her limps and then looks at me. "You look fine" is what she stated, looking baffled at me. She has her hands resting on each side on the grass, face sweating and flushed red from the workout. "Were those exercises not hard?"

I shrug, helping her stand from the ground. "Dad made me do all these things a lot in the past and I often run too around the forest near my house. Maybe I'm used to it"

"Lucky"

I give her a look but decide to not say anything.

After another whole minute, we were asked to join the four boys to eat at the cafeteria. Seungkwan said that "We've burned the calories so let's make some more" and therefore, we sit at an empty table at the cafeteria with our tray of food in front of us. I can spot many of our classmates too – they all have the same mind apparently.

Our group start eating and they’re indulged themselves with chatting, mainly Haechan and Hayeon are the speakers.

It's a bit awkward to sit and eat together with guys. I've never done this before. Eating with a female friend was also a rare occurrence for me back in high school. So, eating like this – with someone I can call friends -- since I came here is just heart-warming.

"Hey Ahri-ah, what'd you thinking about?"

I blink, breaking out of my thoughts when Haechan snaps his fingers in front of me. Everyone else at the table looks at me then. I open and close my mouth then reopening, "I-I wasn't thinking of anything--why? Did you ask something" I say and try to distract the attention by stuffing my mouth with food.

Haechan shrugs, "I just want to ask if you think vampires are real"

I take a double look at him, trying to figure if he’s actually serious or joking about the words he said.

"They're not real" Hayeon retorts back before I could open my mouth. "Vampires are some make belief stories"

Haechan scoffs, "I think they're real"

"Haechan-ah, vampires are beings from the dead. I don't think they're real" Dokyeom adds himself, chewing his food slowly and slowly looks frightens at the possibility of his words. He shivers, "I'd run away if the dead is really here and exist"

"Do you think if vampires are real, would they be hot like in those Twilight characters?" Seungkwan wonders out, "You know, those Earth's movies"

I look at him and raise my eyebrows, "You watch Earth movies?" So far from what you've heard, the rest of them was born and live in Atheia all their life (exclude Jungwoo and Hayeon which they lived on Earth for quite a number of years). To hear one of them mentioned Earth related things, much less entertainment ones, quite surprises me.

Seungkwan wiggles his spoon, his head nodding as he chews his food. "Went summer vacation with my parents last year. Our tour guide mentioned about it and I watched it while we're there"

I make an 'O' with my mouth

He shrugs, nods again. "The movie is quite nice. Lots of..." he hums, "...questionable things but I kinda like it. And Edward is hot"

Unknowingly, my face lit up in a smile.

"Me too, I'm digging that vampire hot look" Haechan chirps in

"I'm team Jacob" Hayeon says proudly, raising up her chopstick. "I always love those hot wolves" she says dreamily before she looks at Haechan. "And wolves are real, unlike vampires"

At the snide comment, Haechan scoffs at her.

I chuckle watching their interaction.

"What is your problem, huh? And really, what do we even know about the truth of this world?" Haechan starts again, moving his hands in big motion. "They might be real out there"

Dokyeom hums like he’s in thinking. It’s a few seconds later when he shrugs, "Haechan might be right. They might actually exist one time and then got extinct, you know, like the phoenixes" he adds in, Haechan smiles widely at him.

"Thank you, my friend!"

Seungkwan, Hayeon and Jungwoo snort

“We have werewolves, fairies, mermaids, sirens, nine-tailed foxes, imps, centaurs and even the rare phoeniexes. So why can't we believe that vampires exist?" Haechan listing them up,

“How did this topic get so worked up?" Seungkwan wonders to himself, drinking his tea. I shake my head with a smile, agreeing with him. "I don't know either"

All of us look amuse at Haechan.

"Why're you curious about vampires anyway?" Jungwoo decides to add himself too.

Dokyeom points his chopsticks at Haechan, "Because he likes vampires"

"You watched too many vampire stories, Haechan-ah" Hayeon comments, "It's getting to your head"

Haechan scoffs again for the umpteenth time and seemingly sulking.

It gains all of our laugh looking at the boy

Our brunch went on with more topics and with Hayeon bickering with Haechan and occassionally Seungkwan. Dokyeom and Jungwoo quietly sitting and insert themselves when they want to. I continue with my food and finish my meal quicker than them, my final food is the delightful chocolate pudding.

"I wonder what bloodline I came from," I heard Dokyeom wondered out to himself when they're at the topic of bloodlines.

"We have mixed blood, dude" Haechan inquires in, "It's like impossible to know which one is more than the other, unless, you really really know your family tree that is"

His words make me wonder about it as well, and it seems like it's not only me that is curious.

"I wonder what my bloodline is" Seungkwan and Hayeon said at the same time. They look at each other simultaneously and laugh afterwards.

Jungwoo nods at the side, "It would be fun to have that transformation ability again. It's rather cool if you think about it"

Hayeon snaps her fingers at Jungwoo's direction, "Yes! Like seriously, I would die to even be able to turn into any creature. I think it's awesome" Hayeon continues. "Our ancestors were awesome"

Seungkwan hums, "But too bad they love the human race too much. They literally abandoned their form to look like a human"

"They probably want to be creative in "

We literally stop at what we're doing at Haechan's statement. The boy pause too, looking at us in confusion. "What?"

Hayeon, Jungwoo and Dokyeom snort while I and Seungkwan chuckle. I add a shake of the head with my face turning pink at what Haechan had said. I did not expect that statement.

"What? It might be true though" Haechan resumes, shrugging before he too, snort and chuckles. "Then why else they want to be like a human?"

"Haechan might be true on that--"

"Are we seriously going to talk about while we're in the cafeteria--"

I freeze for a second. Seungkwan's voice fade out as my focus go to the sudden heat I'm feeling. I turn my head, trying to find it but I can't spot it.

It is him?

I ask myself, trying to spot that man again if he is really the one that had been giving me this strange things.

Black hair...black hair

I see a lot of black hair here. And the warmth and tingles seem to slowly fade away, so the distance and connection is fading. Oh no, he's not getting away, I need to make sure.

I finish up my pudding and place the empty cup on my tray, looking at the rest of them while I lift my off the chair. "I'm sorry guys but I have to go. I'll see you guys later in class"

"You're leaving?" Haechan asks, eyes up at me and a moment later, all of them are looking at me.

I merely nod, still trying to locate that feeling.

"Where're you going?" Hayeon stares up at me, surprised to see me standing up to leave.

"I think I want to head back to the dorm. It's fine, just continue talking, I'll go by myself. I want to take another pudding too"

Hayeon blinks at me. She looks like she wants to say something but decides not to. She purses her lips and nods, "Alright, go back safely ok" she gives me a small smile and I return back and turn around.

"Why wouldn't she be safe?"

I heard Dokyeom innocently asked in the midst of 'byes' from Jungwoo and Seungkwan.

"Because she might get attack by wolves" Haechan humourly answer the boy. The rest snorting out, laughinf and the rest of their conversation fade out the more I walk away from the table.

Like I said, I went to grab the pudding before quickly enter the hallway again, out of the cafeteria. I've lost the warmth while I grabbed the pudding but I continue on walking, wandering until I can feel it again. And luckily, I did. Though it is very faint and very subtle.

It's weird how this strange feelings makes me so curious. It's been only a few days since I came here and things like this happened. Should I be worried?

I don't know where I'm going, by now I'm just wandering like a lost kid. My hand raises up to scratch my hair as I look around the area.

I've lost it again.

Pursing my lips, I want to turn around or move forward but a sudden familiar voice startled me.

"Ahri!"

I turn around, seeing Jihae walking towards me with--

I bow, surprised to see Junmyeon sunbae walking here and more shocked to see him with Jihae. What are these two doing together?

"Please, don't" he shakes his head, talking about my bow. Awkwardly I smile and look between him and Jihae. The girl smiling at me, they're standing next to each other. "Hey, what are you doing here alone? Where's Hayeon?"

"She's still at the cafeteria. I just want to walk around" I answer her, awkwardly standing there in front of them. I stare at the both of them. "What are you two doing together?" Then I remembered that Jihae said that she's close with Suho. "Are you guys together?" Those words came out before I could stop them.

Jihae looks startled and shocked, face slowly turning red, looking like a deer caught in headlights.

While Junmyeon clears his throat and shakes his head, he scratches his nape. "No, no. We're just friends" he says and I can see the subtle disappointment crossed on Jihae's face. "We met by coincident earlier and Jihae wants to send back the book she borrowed. I just accompany her before I get going for class." Junmyeon continues to explain and I slowly nod.

"Ah...I see"

"And where are you going?" Jihae decides to step in as the awkwardness became too difficult to bear. She takes a closer step to me, her smile coming back. "Why don't we go to the library together. You said you love the library"

I look at her and Junmyeon then back at her, head thinking if I should I go with her or continue to wander until I can find back that weird feeling. A moment later, I just nod my head at her with a "Sure."

"Do you still want me to join you, Jihae? You have Ahri" Junmyeon turns to Jihae, looking at her and it is a second later she shrugs, biting her lower lip in reluctance. "If you want to go the you can go oppa. I'll meet you again sometime"

The man smiles softly, nudging her arm with a nod. "We'll see each other again, Jihae. I'll get going--and oh! you two Ahri! I'll see you sometime" he turns to me, giving me a smile as well before he turns around with a clear of his throat, leaving us two girls in the hallway.

Jihae sighing out loud, staring at the sight of Junmyeon walking away

"You have a crush on him" I state freely, not minding to be subtle with the statement. She looks at me in surprise, seeing me lightly smirking at her, before she snorts and pushes me away by the arm.

"Go away"

I chuckle breathily before we start walking again, now heading towards the library. "Why don't you tell him?"

"Tell him what?"

"That you like him"

She snorts again before she sighs, long and with despair. "I don't know...." she kicks the air in front of her, "Was I being too obvious?" she looks at me. I blink and hum, shrugging with a small nod. She sighs again with a little cry. "I'm too hopeless, Ahri-ah"

"No, you're not. I think he likes you too"

She pouts, "He likes me as a friend," she says, slowly linking our arms together with her eyes still looking up front. "We've been friends for a decade and I don't think it's possible for him to even like me more than what we are. You heard him earlier, he said 'We're just friends'" she scoffs with a huge pout."How do you get out this love crush, Ahri? I want to move on but I failed every single time"

At the question, I stare blankly at the path and a moment later I shake my head, "I don't know, Jihae. I've never been in this situation. I've never been in a relationship too"

She looks at me then, "Haven't you had a crush or something in the past?"

I shake my head

"Seriously, none?"

I shake my head again

“How about Kai?”

I make a face at her, “I don’t have a crush on him”

She holds up her hands, “Ok ok, I was just asking. But like really, you’ve never fall in love with someone?” She looks at me in disbelief.

I laugh seeing her reaction, scratching my hair in embarrassment. "I'm not that social to begin with, Jihae. I rarely talk to people, I love to be alone." I look at the front again, "I've never been close to a guy to like him" I tell her, "I'm more hopeless than you."

She purses her lips before she shakes her head, eyeing the hallway as well. "We can be the 'hopeless duo'. The duo who at love"

I laugh at her statement

She smirks hearing my laugh, chuckling as well and before we know it, we've arrived at the library.

The library, once again, make me mesmerizes at how majestic it all look and feel. There is just something to this whole huge book haven that grabs me everytime. I can't stop my happiness from seeping out of me. I can hear Jihae snort at the side as she looks at me while guiding me to the receptionist counter by my arm. It takes a few seconds for me to turn my gaze from the ceiling, the shelves, the tables to the guy behind the counter. He has his eyes on me already and looking like he's amused.

"I remember you" he said. Jihae hands him a few books out of her bag and he takes them from her before he looks back at me. "I saw you here the other day"

At his words, my head trying to think back to where I saw him before. He does look familiar. After a few seconds, it then clicks. "You're that guy with the trolley" is what my mouth lets out first. Jihae looking at the both of us in interest.

He grins widely at that, "Yup. I'm the librarian here, well, initially I was only a helper but the old librarian was too tired and old to look out the library so he passed the job to me. Been here for," he hums a little, absentmindedly looking elsewhere. "For four years now, I think"

"This is Ahri, oppa. She's my roommate." Jihae decides to slide in, showing me to the man behind the counter. "And Ahri, this is Luhan. He's the same age as Suho oppa and they're quite close too"

The man, Luhan, shrug his shoulders at Jihae's last words.

"All those seniors I've been telling you about knew Luhan too. They're friends" Jihae keeps on explaining and Luhan gives her a look. "Which seniors are you talking about?"

"Suho oppa and the rest"

"Ah..." he said before he shakes his head in amusement. "Didn't think my friendship with them is worth telling"

Jihae smiles widely, "Everything related to them is worth telling for" she says with a wink and he snorts before he looks back at me. I'm looking at them in amusement, still figuring how Jihae can be so carefree and open with any people.

"Just ignore what she said" He waves a dismissive hand as a joking manner, the girl rolls her eyes. "It's not that important to know everything about those seniors she's gossiping about. They're all just a bunch of dorks and idiots, trust me"

"Strong and good looking idiots" Jihae adds in proudly with a bright smile and both of us looks amusingly at her.

The meeting with Luhan ended shortly after talking about how he knew the seniors and how he's never a student here. He's been working here for four years but never take part of the academic here. He knew Junmyeon and the rest since they're young. In the past, they lived quite close and often saw each other, though, few years later Luhan and his mother moved and they didn't see each other until Luhan came to work in the academy as the assistant librarian.

"Well, welcome to Enchantia Academy then Ahri" was his last words to me, giving me a friendly soft smile and a gentle pat on the shoulder. "I'll see you around if you ever come back to the library. And if you ever need a book to find just come and call me here and I'll help you search for it"

I return the smile, nodding my head like shy girl. "I'll keep that in mind, oppa. Thank you" I bow my head to him before me and Jihae leave the library. The both of us walk side by side, heading nowhere in particular.

"Are you crushing on Luhan?" Jihae asks out of nowhere, being cheeky and I look at her in surprise. "You were so shy back there"

I look incredulously at her, "First you told me I had a crush on Kai and now on Luhan?"

She’s smiling, cheekily and wiggles her eyebrows. "Well, do you?"

"No, I don't Jihae..." I push her away gently and she laughs. "I don't like anyone"

She scoffs yet she's smiling. "Geez, you're no fun" she says, jokingly. "There's a lot of good looking guys here and no guy caught your attention? Like really? What is your heart made of? Rocks?"

I push her again, more effort this time and she stumbles a bit but is laughing about it. "I'm here to learn, not to fall in love" I say lamely and she snorts out loud.

"Yeah, right" she nudges my shoulder, "But really, try find someone. Don't be hopeless like me. Maybe your first relationship will flourish way better than my previous relationships" she shrugs her shoulders, I look at her in amusement.

"I don't know why we're talking about this. I'm not going to like someone, Jihae. Besides, I don't think anyone's going to like me. I don't talk much and I'm not funny either"

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