"Crazy girl, what's her problem?" Chaewon asks to herself.

The 14-year-old girl was merely minding her own business, reading a book about the business industry and making future investments. She didn't even notice she was following the girl in front of her until the latter rudely assumed she was following her. Whatever, she had no time to deal with emotional children. 

The young teenager does not have the slightest clue on what to do ever since she was kicked out, or as they told her "let go", from the orphanage recently. 

Perhaps life hated her that way, or maybe this was somehow karma for something she did in her past life. However, Chaewon was always one who follows logic and honesty, so she cannot blame the mythical beings and spiritual teachings of the universe for her hardships. She has never had anybody to rely on for the entirety of her life, and she plans on keeping it that way to be successful in the future. 

Chaewon was currently on her way to meet up with the landlord of a possible new apartment she would be staying at. She currently holds 2 million won from the cyber investing competition she recently won, and she plans on using it to finally find a place to live. 

Ever since she was kicked from the orphanage, she has been sleeping in whatever shelter nearby she could find. Sometimes, if she was not allowed in, then she would have to deal with sleeping on whatever park bench she could find, just hoping for nothing bad to happen to her while she desperately slumbers. 

"Ah, Kim Chaewon-ssi!" She looks ahead and finds the landlord waving at her with a clipboard prepared and an obvious fake smile. 

Chaewon respectfully greets and bows to the landlord, whom leads her to the small apartment he would lease to the younger girl. 

Walking into the apartment, it was much smaller and evidently older than other regular apartments, but this was the only building left that Chaewon could afford with her award money.

Touring around the tiny apartment, she knows it's not in the upmost best condition, but if she wants a place to stay then anything will have to do. At this point, she's desperate to at least find a place to sleep before she can worry about anything else. 

"Ok, I'll take it." She nods to the older man and hands him the giant check she received from the competition. 

To her dismay, however, the man gives the check a confused and concerning look. He then hands it back to her and sighs in disappointment.

"Sorry kid, but this is just cyber money. It's basically useless. But hey! You know you can make some real cash with your skills, why don't you start investing for real?" The man tells her, hoping to make Chaewon feel a bit better about the situation.

Chaewon does not feel better. Instead, she sighs and ruffles her hair in frustration. Oh how stupid could she be to think this trash was actually worth anything. Well, now not only does she not have any money, but she has no food or shelter. Whatever, she'll find a way out of it eventually.

"Um sorry I have to go." The teenager takes off in her worn-out clothing and shoes that honestly might fall apart at any moment now.

Chaewon walks the streets and notices the sky becoming darker. Great, not only did she completely screw up finding a place to live but now it was getting close to dark and she was wandering aimlessly without a plan. 

She was frustrated with herself. All she gained from winning that competition was an unusable check and a new laptop that she had no use for. In her fit of anger, she finds the nearest trash can and throws away the giant check and walks away, hoping to come up with a plan before the sun sets. 

But of course, Chaewon's luck was never that great. She hears small sounds of thunder and feels the rain starting to pour on her head. The initial droplets start to become harder and faster, and Chaewon looks around to see people scrambling to the nearest shop or to their cars in order to get away from the rain. She was completely soaked at this point, so she runs back to the trash and grabs the check to put over her head and makes a run for it. 

She stops running after five minutes and finds herself stuck. She has no idea where she was even headed and no idea where she is. Better yet, it was now completely dark, and there was nobody around the streets anymore. Chaewon desperately looks around her surroundings to see if she find something, anything to at least stay for the night, but to no avail. 

Well, that is what she thinks until she turns around and comes face to face with an old lady with an umbrella looking at her in concern. She lightly screams out in fear over the old lady appearing out of nowhere, and plans to turn back around and start running again.

This is until the lady grabs a hold of her harm and forces her to turn back around before running away again.

"Hey, it's raining quite hard young lady, don't you have a place to stay?" The older lady asks the teenager. 

Chaewon. for some reason, is irked by the pity and sorrowful look on the older woman's face. It's as if she was looking at Chaewon like she was some lost and stray dog aimlessly wandering the streets in the worst environment possible. She might be desperate, but her pride is bigger and she wants to make sure the old lady knows that she is doing fine. Anything to get that look off of her face.

"I'm fine...you don't need to worry about me." She says as politely as she can before turning back around and attempting to make a run again.

However, the old woman stops her again and forces her to turn around again. 

Chaewon scowls in frustration and annoyance. She needs to leave and she does not want to be dealing with the pitiful lady who is looking at her like she...like she matters. She can figure it out on her own, she doesn't need anybody's help. She never has, and she never will.

"Jesus christ could you just leave me alone?! I don't need your help!" She yells at the other woman.

"I have a room next to my hotdog stand. It's not much...but it's pretty warm. I can feed you with some of my best selling hot dogs you know? You can-" 

Sighing in irritation, Chaewon looks at the other lady and refuses once again. "How many times do I have to tell you?! I don't need you, I don't need your help. I'm fine!" 

To be honest, Chaewon was no longer filled with desperation of a shelter. She just wanted to get away from this annoying old lady and sleep under a park bench, or a bridge, or whatever she could find on her own. She hated how the old lady looked like she wanted to care for her and nurture her. 

It was impossible to find kind people, Chaewon knew that much. She knew the world was filled with greedy people who acts like backstabbing snakes towards one another. Even if this woman was an old lady, she did not want to make the mistake of trusting her. Once again, Chaewon was fine.

The old lady sighs before leaning closer to the younger girl. "Look, you see that cherry blossom tree next to the hot dog stand? I will leave the keys in the green bird house." She whispers before finally walking away.

Chaewon watches the old lady leave and looks around the streets. It was already late at night and the rain was obviously not going away or letting up anytime soon. Before she could catch any sickness, she needed somewhere to stay. Fast. 

There were sadly no park benches she could slumber on because of the rain, and she was left alone continuing to be drenched under the storm.

"Agh, screw it." She says before heading over to the cherry blossom that the old lady directed her towards and finds the green bird house.

She puts her hand inside and reaches in to find the keys. Once doing so, she heads over to the room next to the old lady's hot dog stand and opens the door. She honestly expected a trap that would end up in her kidnapping, but she instead finds a somewhat comforting environment. 

It was indeed warm like the old lady had said, and Chaewon removes her shoes to look around the room. There was already a pillow with blankets prepared for her on the floor and two hotdogs and a radish wrap with a bottle of banana milk on the table. 

How the hell did the old lady know she would end up slumbering here?

Chaewon has no time for her curiosities. While she was looking at the food, she remembers that she hasn't eaten anything all day. She quickly sits down next to the table and feasts on the food that the older lady prepared for her. 

She goes to sleep that night warmly. For the first time in a long time, Chaewon feels safe. 

 

Waking up the next morning with recollection of the situation she was dealing with the night before, Chaewon quickly packs her belongings and heads outside of the room. But before she was able to escape, she one again finds the annoying old lady waving at her and catching up to her.

"Hey! Wait just a minute!" 

Chaewon stops and rolls her eyes in irritation. Why can't this lady just leave her alone? She already slept over and ate her food. She couldn't feel any more indebted to the lady. She can't owe her anything else.

"What is it now?" She turns around 

"Ahh, what's with that tone of voice? I give you shelter and food, and you talk to a Halmoni this way? Kids these days." She scolds and lightly slaps you on your shoulder.

To be honest, Chaewon did feel a bit guilty over how she reacted. The older woman provided her with her needs at a time of desperation, but what more could she want from her? This old lady was quite naïve and too kind for her own good. Chaewon could not deal with that.

"Look, what else do you want from me? How do you know I'm not a bad person that will rob you, huh?" Chaewon slightly raises her voice at her, hoping to scare her off and intimidate her so she can finally leave Chaewon alone. 

Chaewon is given a complete opposite reaction of what she was hoping for though. Instead of showing signs of fear, the old lady comically laughs at her and lightly slaps her shoulder again. Jesus, what is with this old woman?

"Don't worry, I know you're a good girl. I know you enjoyed that radish wrap I prepared for you." The older lady gives Chaewon a mocking smirk, making the teenager turn red and look away from the woman to hide her face. 

She was embarrassed by how she completely demolished the radish wrap. But, hey! She couldn't help it, she was desperate and hungry last night. Also, she can't help but to admit to herself how delicious the radish wrap was anyways...

"Look at that! Your face is turning red, you enjoyed the meal didn't you? You know, I should call you Ssamu!" The older woman laughs again and lightly slaps Chaewon's shoulder, a habit of hers that is continuing to piss off the moody teenager.

Chaewon scoffs in annoyance and wants to leave the place quickly so she can get on with her life and figure out the rest of her ways. 

"If that's all you have to say then I'm leaving." She turns away again

Before Chaewon could walk away from the old woman, she once again grabs her by the arm and forces the younger girl to turn around, causing her to groan out in frustration. Although Chaewon was mostly rational and hid her emotions well all the time, she was still an angsty teenage girl who would be moody at times. 

"Hold on there Ssamu. I gave you a warm, sauna-like place to live and some delicious food, don't you think you should pay me back?" The old lady crosses her arms and scolds the teenager.

This is what Chaewon was worried about. She knows that she definitely owes the older lady, but she has no money to pay her back for the food. Her cyber money is useless, so now she's disappointed in herself for looking so pathetic. She can't even hand the older lady a single won.

"I-I don't have any money." She looks down at her torn up shoes in embarrassment.

The older lady lightly slaps her on the head, causing Chaewon to be confused and a little bit in pain, rubbing her head while looking at the crazy old lady who decided to hit her. 

"Is that what all you children think we elders want? Money? I don't want money Ssamu, but I can use your help in something." 

Before you can ask what she means by that, the older lady grabs a hold of her arm and leads her back inside the room. She was utterly confused at this point. If it wasn't money that she wanted, then what else could it be?

Was it chores? Would the old lady use her for free labor to help out the hot dog stand? That was most likely what she was going to do with her, but oh well, she had a debt that needs to be repaid. 

The old lady pulls her down next to the table in the warm room again and sighs before speaking. 

"Well, I have a granddaughter, Minjoo. She hasn't been doing too well lately. Her father, also my son, passed away a few days ago and her older sister left to go to the US, so she's been trapping herself in her room all day." 

Chaewon feels some sympathy for her granddaughter. In fact, Chaewon knew exactly how it felt to feel as if you're completely alone in the world, with all the loved ones in your life gone. 

Although Chaewon never knew how it was to lose a loved one, as she was used to being alone in the world. Even though it has become a habit to focus on surviving by herself, she couldn't help but feel a bit envious of seeing families enjoying themselves and just...loving. 

Love was something that Chaewon secretly yearned for, yet something she was so scared of and did not understand. She did not want to lose a loved one like Minjoo, seeing the effects it had on the girl as told by her grandmother. 

"Poor girl, she hasn't been smiling at all recently. You know, she was always like her father. She stayed optimistic, found a reason to smile everyday, say that she would become just like her father. It's a shame really, how broken she is now..." Grandmother tells Chaewon with a sad smile.

Yes, Chaewon feels slight pity for the other girl, but she still doesn't understand why Grandmother is telling her this? Is this supposed to be part of the plan of paying back her debt? 

"I don't understand-"

Before she could finish her sentence, Grandmother cuts her off.

"I want you to be Minjoo's friend. Just...be a companion for her. You should write it though, she would notice if it was me. She doesn't have anybody else except for me and I know she needs someone, as a friend. So, why don't you write her some letters, yeah? You don't have to reveal yourself, just send her some letters in the birdhouse, she'll like that." Grandmother looks at her with a smile.

"Halmoni...how do you propose we do this? I haven't the slightest clue on what to say to her!" Chaewon voices out her concern.

"Don't worry Ssamu, I'll help you out with that. Oh wait! You should sign your name as Ssamu to keep yourself anonymous. Ha, I'm a genius aren't I?" Grandmother laughs 

Chaewon shakes her head and watches Grandmother reach into a box. The older woman then hands her a piece of paper with a pen, looking down at the items in deep focus over what she should write to her "companion."

Chaewon wasn't too fond of the idea because she had no idea how to comfort people, but if she could pay back Grandmother this way then so be it. Besides, how difficult would it be if Grandmother was there to tell her what to write?

They spend the rest of the morning discussing what to write, with grandmother scolding Chaewon every now and then for writing like a pretentious old lady. 

"Ssamu! You write like you're older than me! Come on put some effort into this." 

Chaewon eventually gets the gist of writing like someone who is actually her age. However, the two still spend hours upon hours throwing away drafts of the letter and going through countless paper.

That is, until they finally decide on the perfect first letter. Grandmother approves of it and smiles at the younger girl with a thumbs up. The letter read as follows:

Dear Minjoo,

To be quite honest, I've always noticed you from afar. 

Please don't be scared! I'm not a creep or anything, but I have always been fond of the smile that you keep on your face. Whenever times get rough, or whenever it's pouring with darkness outside, your smile feels as if it's a new spring day. 

I wanted to remind you of how perfect you are, Kim Minjoo. 

A few days ago, I lost my cat.

She was always a feisty creature, but she was someone I could play with and I loved her a lot. She died of old age, I guess that's just how life works, but I can't help but to think about the time I took for granted.

It sounds silly right? I know she was just a cat, but she meant the world to me. I feel lonely these days, so I hope you can find these letters soon. I hope I can be your companion Kim Minjoo. 

From, Ssamu 

Chaewon continues to sleep in Grandmother's little room next to her shop. No matter how much she feasts on the radish wrap, she can't help but to feel as if her tastebuds has just entered heaven every time she takes a bite. Grandmother must have some special powers when it comes to making her delicious food, there is no other explanation.

"Mm Halmoni, you need to give me the recipe one of these days." Chaewon says with a mouthful of food, making Grandmother laugh out loud.

"Maybe one of these days Ssamu..." She looks at the younger girl with a smile. 

The following day, Grandmother excitedly shows Chaewon a letter from the bird house. It seems that Minjoo has replied. Chaewon couldn't help but to also feel a bit of excitement, but she quickly pushes it down and clears , reading the letter from the younger girl.

Dear Ssamu,

I completely understand what you've been going through. 

I feel like I've lost everything these past few days.

But don't worry! Halmoni is still here to take care of me and I couldn't be anymore grateful. She makes me feel less lonely, but now I have you! 

I have always wanted a new friend, a companion who understands me. So thank you Ssamu for making me smile, I'm sure your cat is in heaven and is looking at you proudly.

I might not know who you are, but you're a good person. Thank you for your kindness.

-Minjoo 

Chaewon finishes reading the letter with a wide smile on her face without even noticing it was there.

"She really loved your letter, Chaewon, I cannot thank you enough for making my little Minjoo smile again." Grandmother takes a hold of her hand and gives Chaewon a genuine smile. 

Before they knew it, Chaewon and Minjoo kept up the routine of exchanging letters. It became somewhat of a cycle now, one which Chaewon has come to love and become used to.

Grandmother doesn't help Chaewon with the letters as much as she used to. Even Chaewon didn't notice how focused she was when writing her own letters, ones that came from her heart, and not ones that were from Grandmother anymore.

Everyday at approximately 6pm, Chaewon would head to the bird house and reach inside to find one of Minjoo's letters. Sometimes, she is too excited to read what the latter has to say, so instead of walking back inside the tiny room, she opts for sitting down on the curb and reading it with a smile on her face. 

Minjoo's letters makes her feel something.

She has never had a friend before. She has never felt someone expressing gratitude and care towards them. Minjoo's letters has made her smile more, and she becomes a custom to the routine they hold. 

For the first time, ever, she feels less lonely and cared for. 

She finds a companion.

Chaewon can't even count how many letters they have exchanged towards one another, but at a certain point, the feelings become too much for her to bear. She feels her heart beat rapidly with a feeling in her stomach, almost like butterflies? She's not used to feeling these things, and it overwhelms her. It confuses her. The care that she has been continuing to receive from Grandmother and Minjoo...it's too much. She can't handle it anymore. She can't do this.

So she stops.

She stops writing back to Minjoo. She wants to leave. She needs to leave. 

In the middle of the afternoon, Chaewon finishes packing her stuff and opens the door, opting to finally escape from the feelings that overwhelm her. She can't let anyone else in her life. She was used to being alone, and that's what she was going to do in the future. 

She can't keep relying on Grandmother anymore for food and shelter. She'll pay her back one day. She's sure of it.

She places the keys in the birdhouse and starts to walk away, not before Grandmother finds her and grabs a hold of her arm, successfully stopping her from proceeding any further. 

"Ssamu where are you going?" Grandmother asks her.

"I...I have to go Halmoni. Thank you for everything." Chaewon tries her best to keep her emotions intact, putting on a straight face and turning her back on Grandmother. 

She was stopped again.

"So that's it? You're just going to walk away after everything? You're just going to-"

Chaewon can't help it anymore. The emotions become too much for her to handle, so something in her snaps and she finally raises her voice at Grandmother, letting out all the emotions that put a weight on her shoulder.

"What else do you want from me?! You....you used me for those stupid letters. Calling me Ssamu, making me feel-feel as if I was safe. You Fed me, sheltered me, and I...I have NOTHING to offer you Halmoni! You need to stop being so kind to people. You're too naïve to live in a cruel world like this." Chaewon lets out a breath after her rant and runs away.

This time, Grandmother didn't stop her. 

 

It was 6pm. It's raining again.

Chaewon was sitting in the bus terminal waiting for the next bus to arrive. Although it wasn't too late, there wasn't much people surrounding her, and she's okay with it. She's completely used to being alone...yet why does it feel like this now? She feels sick to her stomach. She feels guilty. But she can't. She plans on taking her investing skills to a real career, so she can be rich and successful. That's the plan, and there's nothing and nobody else there to stop her.

She can't help it though. 

She can't help but to remember Minjoo. How at this exact time, she would be reaching into the green bird house to find one of Minjoo's letters. The younger girl's last letter she read was one asking her to finally meet the writer in person.

The bird house is probably filled with Minjoo's letters at this point. The younger must have wondered where she wandered off to. Wondered where her only friend went, and for that, she feels regretful. 

But Chaewon is Chaewon, and Chaewon knows to push down those feelings and focus on her future. 

Lost in her thoughts, she barely notices the figure of an old lady sitting down next to her. 

Looking beside her, she sees Grandmother looking ahead. She sighs, growing frustrated with the lady who keeps on following her. Seriously, she was already headed on a bus to Seoul, can't this woman just leave her alone already? Instead of scolding her though, she tells her of her plans.

"I'm going to Seoul. I'm going to make use of my investing skills. I'll be rich Halmoni." 

Instead of receiving a reply, Grandmother sighs and pulls out a shoe box from behind her. Staring at her in confusion, Chaewon watches the older lady approach and and kneels down, removing her torn up and drenched shoes from her feet and opening the box.

They were new shoes. They were green, and it reminded her of the bird house. 

Before she could protest, Grandmother puts the shoes on Chaewon, leaving the younger girl no choice but to watch the older woman. Great, now she feels even more indebted towards Grandmother, and she needs to get away from her. Now.

So she tries to hurt her with her words. 

"I'll be richer than you. I'll become successful and own a business. Doesn't that make you jealous, Halmoni?" She mockingly asks Grandmother with a fake spite in her voice. 

All Chaewon wants to do is to drive out Grandmother from her life. Make the older woman hate her for abandoning Minjoo, for abandoning Grandmother.

Grandmother finishes putting the shoes on Chaewon and gets back up to sit next to Chaewon before her bus arrives. She doesn't show any signs of hatred or resentment towards the teenager though, instead, she looks at her. And she smiles.

"Do me a favor, Ssamu. Don't come to me when you're rich. Don't come to me to give me any money, to flaunt your wealth, to flaunt your business." 

Chaewon hopes her words have hurt her. It seems as if Grandmother doesn't want her to come back to her life anymore. Good. Chaewon convinces herself that things are better this way.

Grandmother doesn't make it easy though.

"But please...come to me when you feel like you have nobody else. When you're unhappy, when you need a place to stay. Come to me when it's raining, when the thunder roars and you have nowhere else to go. You know where the keys are." 

Chaewon looks away. She feels her eyes starting to tear up, so she vigorously blinks them away to keep herself composed. Why, why can't Grandmother just hate her? Why must she continue to be kind? Even when Chaewon has been nothing but rude and annoyed at her. She should hate Chaewon, please, why can't she just hate her?

Before any of the two can utter another word, the announcer comes on the speaker, notifying passengers that the next bus to Seoul has arrived. 

Chaewon struggles to get up from her seat, but when she does, she quickly walks away. She needs to go. She feels as if staying there for another second will force her to stay. She can't stay.

If she stays, the butterflies from Minjoo's letters will come back.

If she stays, she will owe more to Grandmother.

She can't.

Before she reaches the doors to the bus, however, she looks back.

She looks back at Grandmother with tears in her eyes. Grandmother stands there, smiling at her.

She can't hate this woman. The woman who gave her a shelter when she was desperate, the woman who gave her delicious radish wrap, the woman who introduced her to her first friend. 

Before she knew it, before she could control it, she runs back to Grandmother and embraces her, sobbing into her shoulders. Forget any form of rationality left in her, Chaewon needed this. She needed to show how grateful and how guilty she was. So she cries, she cries more than she ever has for the woman who has shown great care to her.

"Halmoni...Halmoni...I-I'm sorry, Halmoni." She can barely let the words out due to her voice cracking and the emotions finally letting themselves out. 

She makes a promise that day.

She will come back in the future. She will repay Grandmother, the kind woman who showed her nothing but care and love. 

She will repay Minjoo, the girl who taught her how it is to have a companion. 

She promises.