Here’s a confession: there’s hardly any difference going from Winter’s fake girlfriend to whatever this thing we currently had.

               She still behaved toward me the same — well, I guess, minus the subtle caution in her actions before, obviously wary that she’d do something that would make me call the deal off.

               Other than that, it was pretty much how it was.

               If there was someone who was feeling the change in our relationship, it was definitely her.

               I mean, imagine me going from cursing her every time I get the chance, to this — this being wanting to kiss those supple lips as many times as the opportunity allowed me to.

               Though, you really couldn’t blame me.

               Even before this whole change of heart happened, I already find Winter so darn irresistible, and now that I had come to terms with my feelings, there was just no way I could keep my hands to myself. 

               And don’t get me started with her ridiculous tendency to make everything she does, sensual. Seriously, I had absolutely no idea how she even does that.

               In other words, Winter was a walking temptation, and I, for sure, was going to need to cling harder to my crumbling self-control — which she previously claimed to be non-existent — if I want to keep everything between us rated 13. Though, what happened inside the Chemisty Lab was — ehem — far from it.

               A deep shade of red colored my face when I was reminded of what happened inside that room.

               No, we did not do the deed.

               Doing it in school was indecent and uncomforta— no, Jimin, what the hell?

               I shook my head to get rid of improper thoughts.

               Anyway, it was not something that I could easily move on from because even though we had already kissed a few times, that night felt so different. 

               The way she kissed me with so much fervour, not stopping even though we were already running out of breath.

               The gentle bites and soothing swipes of her tongue on the skin of my neck that elicited quiet moans.

               Burning hands roaming over my body, touching all the right places.

               She even left multiple marks on my collarbones even though I told her not to.

               I guess, I should just be thankful the places were not exposed for everyone’s eyes to feast on.

               She really did not hold back.

               “A penny for your thoughts?”

               Well, speak of the devil.

               I cleared my throat, trying to appear that I wasn’t just reminiscing about our make out session last night.

               “Nothing important, really.” I placed my pen down, tearing my gaze from the Philosophy book that I’d been trying to read and digest for about thirty minutes now here in the library — keyword: trying — to look up at her. “I was just wondering how would our relationship progress from here on, I guess.”

               That’s a good one, even if I do say so myself.

               Ever since the festival, which by the way, was just a day ago, things pretty much went back to normal with the numerous school works, and all except my relationship with Winter. 

               If the idea of us alone together on the campus would send me panicking before, afraid that someone would catch sight of us and spread weird rumours that could potentially destroy the littlest of chance that I had with her sister, now, even Winter could not help herself from being taken aback every time I would invade her personal space, and drape myself all over her. Then, would stare at me in amusement once she regained herself, muttering things such as: “Everybody’s looking, you know?” which I would answer with: “And? Let them look.”

               Besides, it was kind of fun to see their comically shocked faces upon seeing us together, and not bickering.

               Oh, and to be clear, it was not because I wanted to flaunt my relationship with her.

               You could say that it was just my way to somehow make up to her for the way I made her think that I was ashamed of her.

               I was stupid and did not know any better.

               That was why, even though I so badly wanted to make things official between us, I decided to better myself first and work on my shortcomings until I could finally say that I am deserving of her affection.

               Initially, I thought it was only natural to do these things on my own, but then, growing and maturing with her did not sound too bad at all.

               I had a long way to go.

               “Must you overthink everything?” she piped up, pulling me out of my thoughts.

               I rolled my eyes. “Must you always antagonize me?”

               She chuckled. “There is no essence in thinking about how things will play out going forward. The present, babe, the present.” She raised and wiggled her index finger. “You must focus on the now.”

               I bit my lip, shrugging my shoulders.

               Even though it was just an answer I came up with in seconds to hide my actual thoughts, it really did cross my mind, once or twice.

               And I knew she was right.

               It was just overthinking had already become a second nature of mine.

               “What are your plans after school, anyway?”

               “Well, I have been meaning to play this new Zelda game,” she said. “I reckon, now’s the best time to do that before Uchi spoils the whole plot. Unless you have other plans for us?”

               Oh, you know damn well.

               “Could I come over?” I asked, hopefully. “I’d like to know what about these video games that had you two so obsessed over them.”

               Lies.

               I would just like to spend more time with her.

               That way, I’d have the chance to know more about her.

               She gave a sly grin. “Damn, wouldn’t want me to be out of your sight even just for a second now, huh? I am not going to lie, I take great pleasure in being this wanted by you.”

               I looked away, not having the courage to debunk her accusations because, well, it was true.           

               The lack of response made her grin grow all the wider.

               The old Jimin would definitely laugh at my face.

               “Of course, you could come over. You did not even have to ask.”

               “That’s settled then.” I glanced down at my wristwatch. “I better get back to our room. Class is starting soon.”

               She picked up the book that she was reading, seeming to intend to go back to the page she left off.

               “Sure, babe. I will see you after school.”

               I frowned. “You are not planning to cut class again, are you?”

               “I won't,” she denied. “I am about to head back too.”

               I squinted my eyes, “You better be.”

               "Aye, aye."

               That dismissive attitude had me doubting the genuinity of her words, but I chose not to say anything anymore and just went on my way.

               There was no helping her lack of enthusiasm towards her studies, after all.

               Stupid ability to ace everything without studying.

               I felt my phone vibrate just as I was about to reach for the doorknob of the library.

 

               1 Message: Jisoo Yoo

 

               My eyebrows scrunched.

               What did she want now?

 

Jisoo:     Mother will be home tonight and she is expecting to see you.

 

               ...what?

               No way.

               After weeks of acting like I did not exist again after that party, she would expect me to welcome her home with open arms?

               She had totally forgotten her shame.

               Even had the nerve to inform me as if it mattered.

               I couldn’t care less.

 

Jimin:     Whatever.

 

 

               Because of Jisoo’s unwanted news, I lost interest to focus on my remaining classes.

               The idea that I would come home and see her in the living room, sitting on the couch with one leg over the other while drinking her favourite red wine was more than enough to sour my mood. And the fact that I am still this affected by the thought of her despite telling myself countless times that I do not care was just rubbing salt to the wound.

               “You look like you want to kill somebody,” Aeri commented while stuffing her things inside her backpack. “Is something the matter?”

               Now, for the nth time, I let out an annoyed sigh. “Mother’s coming over for some reason. You know she never comes home, unless she has matters to discuss with me that she deems important enough to leave her precious hospital.”

               “That explains why you were not paying attention to the discussion.” She flung her backpack over her shoulders. “You usually could not be bothered over things concerning your parents. Where is this sudden anxiety coming from?”

               “I don’t know,” I muttered, exasperatedly. “I just had this feeling that whatever she has to say later will make me despise her even more.”

               Encounters with her never ended on a good note.

               “There’s no point in worrying about the inevitable, Yooji,” she said as a matter of fact. “Simple: just ditch her. Pretend you are busy with school stuff or something.”

               I paused, mulling over her proposed solution.

               Ditch her?

               I knew I had been nothing but hostile to her, however, I never had the resolve to actually defy her wishes.

               Being forced to do something was one thing, but worrying about the things she would do if I go against her was another thing.

               I was aware of what that wicked woman was capable of doing.

               “I’m not sure, Ri...”

               She began to make her way out of the classroom. “Set your worries aside for now. We have a major quiz in about ten minutes. You wouldn’t want to flunk now, would you?”

               Quiz?

               Oh, right.

               I face-palmed after realizing that I had almost forgotten about that, then shook my head to try to clear my head.

               "I do not have much of a choice, do I?"

               In spite of the incessant thoughts of what might happen later, I managed to remember all of the things I studied the day prior, and accurately answered all the questions, acing the quiz. That's one thing off the list that I had to worry about.              

               Now, I only had to choose between facing my mother or ditching her.

               The last option sounded so promising, especially since I originally made plans with Winter to come over to her house after school.

               That would make a really good distraction since I do not seem to think about anything whenever I'm with her.

               It's just Winter, Winter, Winter.

               Oh, I was going insane.

               For my last remaining class, I spent the time contemplating my options.

               It was just so easy to go with Aeri's idea, so I wouldn't have to deal with the inevitable.

               If only my mother would be so nice and allow me to get away with it without any trouble.

               "Kim's here, Yooji."

               I raised my head when I heard Aeri speak to look at Winter who was leaning by the door of our classroom; nonchalant about the stares and whispers she was getting from the students around her.

               When our eyes met, and a small smile graced her lips, I knew then that my decision was already made.

               Seriously, the choice should've been very obvious.

               I could not believe I was even considering cancelling on her to subject myself to torturous hours with my mother and her likely lame prattle.

               How dumb.

               I stood up, and made my way towards her, mirroring her smile.

               Ah, I'm down bad, for real.

               "Hey, you ready to go?"

 

 

               Winter's place was deserted as usual, much like how mine was; except for the few maids who cordially greeted us upon our arrival before going back on doing their jobs.

               I knew it was not the right time, but I couldn't stop myself from wondering about Ryujin's whereabouts.

               The dance competition was happening tomorrow, and I hadn't seen her since the school festival.

               I wasn't even sure if she came to watch my club's performance for I was too occupied thinking about Winter to even bother with anyone else.

               "Ryujin's at a nearby dance studio with the dance club," Winter suddenly spoke, startling me. "Said to finalize some stuff for tomorrow's event."

               I blinked.

               "How did you even know what I was thinking?"

               Now I was sure she was practising witchcraft.

               "You are not so difficult to read."

               I held my breath at her tone.

               Monotonous and just flat-out uninterested.

               "I'm sorry," I mumbled. "I shouldn't be thinking about her."

               She waved her hand dismissively. "It is not a big deal."

               I refrained myself from saying the opposite to avoid a potential argument.

               Anyone could tell it was a big deal if a mere mention of the name could affect her like this.

               Change the subject, Jimin, change the subject.

               "Uh, so, are you going to play your game in your room?"

               She nodded. "You go on ahead. I am just going to go prepare something for us to eat."

               ...I just dampened the mood, didn't I?

               Way to go.

               "Alright," I said, defeated. "Can I borrow some of your clothes? This uniform is uncomfortable."

               The supposedly innocent question made her grim expression turn into something... suggestive.

               "Or you can just walk around wearing nothing but your undergarments."

               I stared at her through incredulous eyes. “You and your strange way to turn everything ual needs to be studied.”

               “Was just giving suggestions.” She shrugged her shoulders with feigned innocence, though her lacklustre eyes were telling the otherwise. “Get moving, babe. Turn the Switch on for me.”

               That, I did with as much speed as possible before she could come up with something to embarrass me further.

               Seriously, I could never predict what was going to come out of that sinful lips of hers. It was like, I always needed to be prepared for the worst.

                It really was a wonder how her mind worked sometimes.

                As I reached her room, I immediately went through her closet, choosing an oversized shirt, and pairing it with a sweat shorts. Far from my usual style, but it guaranteed comfort so I couldn’t really complain.

               To avoid chances of her walking in on me, I opted to change in the bathroom.

               Better to be safe than sorry.

               You just never know with that woman. 

               I threw my uniform in the laundry basket and made a mental note not to forget about it later.

               Once I am all done, I fumbled and her Switch which was placed just below the wide television.

               I wasn’t that familiar with how it worked, but I’d seen Aeri do it a lot of times to be able to know something as basic as setting it up.

               There, all set.

               I climbed over the bed to make myself comfortable while waiting for Winter, allowing my eyes to wander about as it had been a while since the last time I was here.

               Though, there was nothing new to see. 

               Aside from the cabinets housing her countless trophies, bookshelves from ceiling to floor, game consoles, and her violin that I had already seen, her room was pretty much the same, saved for the scattered paperwork on her study table, and an unsealed case of The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom.

               That was probably the game she was talking about.

               I remember how Aeri went feral upon its release, saying she waited six long years for it.

               "Here's your homemade fries." I gazed up at Winter who carefully placed the bowl, and can of soda on the bedside table. "Made with these skillful fingers you fancy so much."

               Oh, good lord.

               "Shut it, Winter."

               She let out a low chuckle as she went around to grab the Switch's controller before settling herself beside me.

               I noticed that she had already changed out of her uniform and was now wearing a sleeveless shirt, and a sweat short just like mine.

               For some reason, this Winter was so attractive.

               The tattoo.

               It was definitely because of the tattoo.

               "You sure you won't get bored?" She pushed some buttons on the controller until the thumbnail of the game showed up on the screen. "Open-world games that are lore-rich are not for everybody."

               "Don't worry about me," I said. "I'll find a way to entertain myself somehow."

               I tried to keep myself immersed for the first few minutes of the game, listening to the dialogues even though I understood none of it while enjoying the food that she prepared. This was one of the few things that Winter found interesting; enough to completely forgot about me with the way she was so engrossed that she couldn't be bothered to spare me some glance. I figured, there must be something in it that could pique my interest as well.

               It would be nice if this would turn out as something that we both could enjoy.

               However, as it progressed, I found myself feeling completely lost, unable to comprehend anything about what was going on, hence, I gave up trying.

               "I don't know how you aren't getting bored when you are just walking around, picking up stuff, and killing those weird-looking robots."

               "This is just some kind of a tutorial," she replied without looking at me. "It gets better."

               It gets better, she said.

               "And if it doesn't?" I stared at her expectantly.

               Surely, she would do something, right?

               It took a minute before she was able to respond, putting a crease between my eyebrows.

               "Then there's no helping it. As I have previously claimed, it is not for everyone."

               I unconsciously jutted out my lower lip.

               That was not the answer that I was hoping for.

               She was being dismissive.

               I wasn't informed that she was the type who couldn't read between the lines.

               "You are so insufferable."

               That fell on deaf ears.

               "Win."

               She hummed, noncommittal.

               "Winter."

               Another hum.

               "Minjeong."

               Then silence.

               I puffed a breath.

               She really went and decided to completely ignore me.               

               It seemed like conversing with her wasn't enough to peel her eyes off the screen.

               The game was that riveting, it appeared.

               With that in my mind, I began to fidget on my spot, moving around restlessly, subtly hitting her in the process in an attempt to distract her.

               It went on for a couple of minutes until she finally had enough.

               “Hey, stop that.”

               I bit back a grin.

               That worked like a charm.

               She still wouldn’t look at me though.

               “Stop what?”

               “Whatever it is that you are doing.”

               I drew nearer until our knees were brushing against each other.

               “I don’t understand, Winter.”

               The sound of the game disappeared, indicating that she paused the game; then, she was craning her neck to stare at me blankly.

               I stared back.

               Almost there...

               She dropped the controller, turning her torso to wrap her farther arm around my waist, making it appear like she was fully hugging me.

               "I figured it would come down to this."

               "What are you doing?" I asked, confused.

               I felt her hold tighten, then I was already on her lap before I could even process what was happening. 

               "There, much better, isn't it?"

               I placed my palms on her shoulders to push her, eyes wide in surprise.

               "What the hell?"

               This was not what I was aiming for.            

               She circled both of her arms around me, placing her chin on my shoulder before picking the controller back up.

               This...         

               "I'll just finish this quest, then my attention is all yours."

               Blood rushed up to my face.

               She and her tendency to always do the unexpected...

               I could only shake my head before resting my head on her chest.

               This feels comfortable.

               "I can't believe you..."

               She cackled, her chest rumbling along.

               Oh, I like how I felt it more than I heard it.

               "You like it."

               Touché.

               I snuggled my nose against her neck, inhaling her familiar scent that gave me so much comfort.

               The fact that there was a time when I used to despise it — the same scent that I badly missed when she ended our deal.

               It was really funny how far we had come.

               Which reminded me,

               "Did you ever get mad at me for doing what I did?"

               There was a slight pause in her movements, clearly not expecting the question.

               I had been meaning to ask her ever since we made up.

               It was logical to assume that yes, she did, because who wouldn't?

               Still, I wanted to bring up the subject in order to properly apologize.

               That's the least that I could do.

               Bare minimum, I know, but I figured I should start with something small.

               Thinking about it now, I should’ve done that first before going around and making out with her.

               "No."

               I scoffed, raising my head to properly look at her. "Be honest with me."

               “I am being honest.”

               “No, you are not,” I disagreed. “How could you not be mad?”

               She gazed up at me, her eyebrows furrowing. “Why are you so certain I was?“    

               “Because there’s no way you were not.”

               She let out an audible breath before placing the controller down, her full attention now on me.

               “I’m not sure why you are being so insistent that I was even remotely mad because that is just not true. Some part of me probably tried to, I don’t know, but it was futile. I can never be mad at you. If I could, we wouldn’t have reached this point in the first place.“

               I held her gaze, observing her eyes for any sign that would tell that she was being genuine.

               “If you must know, it was maddening to pretend that you do not matter to me; to stop my eyes from searching for you among the crowd; to ignore those pleading eyes every time we would cross paths. Every single thing I did then was against my will. However, I swore that I would hold up my end of the deal. I was afraid that if I did not, you would hate me even more. I couldn’t have that, Karina.”

               I blinked, mouth opening to try to say something, then closing again when nothing came out like a fish out of the water.

               “Even if I had all the reasons to hate you, I would always choose not to. What I feel for you is what is keeping me grounded; it keeps me sane; it drives me crazy in all the best way possible,” she professed all in one breath. “It is the only positive thing among the negativities in my life, and it would be extremely foolish to deprive myself of that — of you.”

               That shut me up.

               What she had just said was more than what I had anticipated.

               This was the person whom I used to consider my archenemy — the bane of my existence.

               The rivalry between us had always been one-sided.

               How could I be so dumb?

               I buried my face in her neck.

               “God, you are so stupid,” I murmured. “Any normal people would get mad at those who caused them pain, you know?”

               “You are in luck then.” I felt her hands on my hips. “Because I am not normal.”

               That earned herself a laugh.

               “Still, I wanted to apologize for being so horrible to you.” I pulled away to look at her in the eye. “I was so blinded by envy that I failed to see you. Every single thing that I did, you deserved none of it. From here on out, I swear I’ll make it up to you if that’s the last thing I do.”

               “You really don’t need to,” she replied. “But if you insist, then be my guest.”

               I smiled. “And my apology?”

               She smiled back. “Is accepted.”

               My lips stretched so wide that I was full-on grinning.

               I let my eyes linger on her face, admiring every detail — her pointed nose, her naturally long eyelashes, her perfectly shaped lips, her eyebrows — every single flaw — the scar, the mole; the way she looked at me, the fond smile...

               She watched as my hand reached for her face, caressing her skin gently, settling it along her jawline.

               God...

               I felt my heartbeat pick up its pace.

               The pent-up emotions threatened to come crashing down on me at once — bottled-up feelings wreaking havoc as if wanting to burst — to be known.

               I-

               “I like you, Winter.”

               There.

               The words that sat heavily on my tongue for a while, just waiting for the right moment to be let out.

               I didn’t know it would be this relieving — like heavy boulders were finally removed from my shoulders.

               There was a beat of silence.

               It seemed as if she was still processing what she had just heard.

               And I waited.

               This was nothing compared to what she had gone through.

               A few more seconds passed, and she was finally wearing that infamous smirk of hers, though her eyes showed genuine joy.

               How stunning.

               “Took you long enough.”

               I playfully rolled my eyes, leaning down to place a chaste kiss on her lips.

               “You really are so insufferable.”

               She gave me a smug expression. “You like me this way.”

               Oh, no.

               I think I just inflated her ego.

               “Unfortunately.”

               She raised her eyebrow and was about to say something in retaliation when I noticed my phone lit up with Jisoo’s name on the screen.

               Sensing the worse, I immediately grabbed the device to read the messages.

 

               2 Messages: Jisoo Yoo

 

Jisoo:     Get yourself home now, Jimin.
                Or Mother will search every nook and cranny of Seoul to find you.

 

               .