Ice cream flavored lips.

 

Salt scented air.

 

Cotton candy kisses.

 

Sand between toes.

 

Legs tangled on the beach.

 

Haunted memories flashed behind closed eyelids like a horror film. Her eyes flew open.

 

Silky dark hair.

 

Beauty mark under red lips.

 

Worried eyes.

 

Her demons retreated like the tides at Malibu, hiding back in the dark depths of her mind.

 

“You okay?”

 

Minjeong smiled, hoped it didn’t look forced. “I should be the one asking you that.”

 

Jimin shrugged. She looked even prettier than Minjeong remembered, if that was possible: hair carelessly tied back with a hair clamp, white shirt, denim shorts, smelling like blueberries tainted with the scent of outdoors. When she saw her with her iconic marimba ringtone, it was like an angel had descended to save her from hell.

 

She’s adorable, playing with her seat belt that she never once removed during the entire flight. “I can manage--” as though challenging her, the plane shook ever so slightly and she’s jumping on her seat, holding on to the armrest.

 

“Uh, sorry.” she sheepishly said, letting go of Minjeong’s arm.

 

It’s like Paris all over again.

 

Before she could hold on to something else, Minjeong’s reaching out, taking her hand in hers. Her fingers were cold, tips calloused from playing the guitar. Palms clammy. Skin soft.

 

“Better?”

 

“Yes.” A smile of gratitude. “Thank you.”

 

Silence engulfed them after that.

 

When Minjeong asked Jimin to take her away, the latter obviously didn’t expect that she meant out of the country. But when Minjeong explained, Jimin nodded at once and booked a flight without questions.

 

Minjeong appreciated it. How she never once pried. How she’s sitting on yet another plane ride despite being afraid of flying.

 

When Minjeong found out through Yizhuo that Jimin had gone to Seoul and then back to New York again just for her, she wanted to give the girl a big hug and at the same time nag her for wasting time and money. She should’ve contacted her first. But then again Minjeong could tell herself the same.

 

And knowing how Jimin had vowed to never return to Korea but did so for her...Minjeong could only wish she did not go to such lengths. Not with what she actually had to say.

 

“You must have a lot of questions.” She spoke.

 

Eyes studied her. “I have several, yes.”

 

Minjeong thought about it for a while before saying, “All my demons have her smile.” She gave her a sideway glance. “If you get what I mean.”

 

Jimin hummed, squeezing her hand. “I already guessed so.”

 

Minjeong chuckled. It sounded empty. “Is there anything you want to know?”

 

Jimin’s already shaking her head. “Nothing you’re not willing to tell me yet.”

 

This is a bad idea. Minjeong should’ve just dragged Jimin somewhere quiet, told her what she wanted to say, and be on her merry way back to Seoul. Instead, she’s on a plane to Canada, on another trip with her bestie, pushing back the inevitable, and falling deeper, harder each time Yoo Jimin decides to be...well, Yoo Jimin.

 

What have I gotten myself into?

 

And when Jimin gives her that adorable confused smile, probably wondering why she’s staring too long, Minjeong knew there’s no turning back.

 

What she has to say can wait.

 

And, well, she’s kind of already on the plane now, so…

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Whitehorse, Yukon, Canada.

 

Minjeong had never heard of the place before but Jimin seemed familiar with it. Hell, the girl’s probably at least acquainted with all cities in the world. She curiously peered out of the window of their taxi, watching barren lands and the occasional warehouses speed by, questioning herself for the nth time what the heck she was doing there.

 

White snow was laid thick over everything, piled beside the road like icing on a cake. Frosted trees loomed over from the sides which Minjeong fixated at so fascinatedly, the child in her wondering if she’ll spot Big Foot peeking from the shadows. Or a yeti. That would be cool. Will it look like the one in Plants vs Zombies?

 

The hotel wasn’t far from the airport, merely half an hour’s car ride away. Minjeong lugged her belongings to her side of the room. She didn’t bring much, just a duffel bag as if she’s about to spend the night at a friend’s place instead of travelling halfway across the globe.

 

Jimin was supposed to book them separate rooms, but the hotel was full and only had vacancies for shared bedrooms. Minjeong didn’t really mind and told Jimin so, stopping her from calling a different hotel.

 

Snow started falling outside. Minjeong watched with a frown. She did not pack for this weather. She glanced at Jimin, busy fixing her things on the other side of the room. She only had one huge suitcase aside from her sound system equipment like it contained her entire house. And maybe it did.

 

“When are you going back?”

 

Minjeong looked away, eyes back out of the window. “On the day after tomorrow.”

 

“I see.”

 

Silence engulfed them once more. Outside, flurries of snow poured harder like somebody just shook the snowglobe, laying thick enough on the ground to build a snowman. Minjeong’s never done that before. She could never stand the cold.

 

She braved another glance at Jimin. The girl’s on her bed, lying on her stomach as she wrote on a notebook--possibly a planner. She seemed comfortable, unlike Minjeong who didn’t seem to know what to do with her hands.

 

“I’m planning our itinerary.” Jimin explained, having caught her staring. “It’s a pity if you don’t see the sights before you leave.”

 

Minjeong looked out of the window again, squinting at the quaint little town. In the distance, a Burger King logo flickered. On and off. On and off. Until it just decided to die.

 

Jimin’s laughter made her turn.

 

“Don’t judge the book by its cover.”

 

Minjeong knit her brows.

 

“It’s written all over your face.” Jimin explained. “Tomorrow, I swear you’ll see the most beautiful view you’ll ever see in your entire life.”

 

Minjeong stared at her smile.

 

Well, she’s already seeing it.

 

“What do you have in mind?” She asked, stepping away from the window to sit on her own bed.

 

“It’s a secret.” Jimin cheekily replied.

 

Minjeong snorted, lying on her back. It’s a relief Jimin’s acting normal. As if their little video exchange on the internet never happened. As if no feelings were spilled. It made the palpable tension between them easier to ignore.

 

“At least give me a hint?” She implored.

 

“Hmm,” Jimin hummed, lips pursed and feet swinging up in the air behind her. “Don’t unpack, we’re leaving to go camping tomorrow.”

 

Minjeong’s jaw dropped. “What?” She exclaimed. “In this weather?”

 

Jimin nodded. “In this weather.”

 

“You’re crazy.”

 

Jimin laughed, “Come on, it’s going to be fun.”

 

“You say that all the time.”

 

“And I never fail to deliver,” Jimin winked--or at least tried to. “Have I ever made you regret anything in Paris?”

 

Well. There’s one thing. But that’s probably not what she’s talking about.

 

Minjeong rolled to her other side, back facing Jimin, and buried her face into the soft pillows. “Wake me up when it’s time to eat.” She said, voice muffled.

 

“You should at least change first.”

 

But Minjeong’s already drifting off to dreamland.

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Jimin was right--well, she’s always right. When it comes to sights to see, anyway. The next day, they took a taxi to a hostel located along the borders of Whitehorse. On their way in, Minjeong spotted steaming pools. Hot springs. Will they be going in for a soak? The thought made her giddy, the frisk winter winds making her crave warmth more than usual.

 

Leaving their luggage in their room, they set up their tent at the campgrounds just behind the hostel which Minjeong wasn’t really happy about. It was cold, and while Jimin had lent her winter clothes to keep her warm, they hung on her frame like clothes on a hanger.

 

“I don’t know why we’re out here doing this when we could just stay in the hostel where it’s warm and nice,” she grumbled, wrestling with a pole. “This is totally unnecessary.”

 

Jimin laughed, “What’s the point of going here if we’re just going to be cooped up?” she was crouched down, driving stakes into the ground while Minjeong connected the poles.

 

“But it’s too cold--gah!” she yelped, forehead stinging. Her hand had slipped and she somehow hit herself with the pole. She glared at the offending object, “Hey!”

 

Jimin’s laughter filled the air again. Footsteps crunched over and the next thing she knew, the brunette was right in front of her. She’s still laughing as she gingerly cupped her cheek, carefully tilting her head up. Even the cold weather couldn’t stop the heat that rushed up to Minjeong’s face.

 

“Does it hurt?” she asked, still grinning as she inspected Minjeong’s forehead.

 

“You’re making fun of me.”

 

Jimin’s smile widened. “You did that to yourself.” she pointed out.

 

Minjeong pushed her away, face burning, “Shut up.”

 

Jimin laughed again, taking the poles from her hand. “I’ll take care of this before you ruin your pretty face.”

 

Minjeong pretended that it didn't cause a butterfly apocalypse in her stomach and went to sit at the side, watching Jimin skillfully pitch the tent. She must’ve done this a lot before but really, what can this girl not do?

 

There’s something. About the way Jimin easily maneuvered the poles, brows slightly furrowed, and lips puckered in concentration. Whenever she had to exert force, her entire face scrunched up. Nose wrinkling and eyes squeezing shut and lips pressed to a thin line. Something adorable. Endearing. Attractive. It made something rise in Minjeong’s chest. So she forced herself to look away.

 

When were they going to stop pretending? Minjeong had to go back to Korea the next morning. She would love to extend her stay but she had important appointments she couldn’t cancel which left them the rest of the day to sort out whatever was going on between them.

 

She had to tell her. No matter what, she had to tell her.

 

“Minjeong, look!” Jimin called, grinning wide as she presented the upright tent with a proud wave of her arms.

 

Maybe later. She can tell her later.

 

“Come on, it’s warm inside!”

 

It was indeed warmer inside the tent. Jimin spread out a duvet from heaven knows where and Minjeong made herself comfortable in their little shelter. A little too comfortable that she did not want to go out anymore but Jimin didn’t have the same sentiments. The girl was outside gathering firewood and whatnot while Minjeong peeked from inside the tent.

 

“What are you doing?”

 

“Trying to make a fire.” Jimin answered. “I bought marshmallows at the hostel. You like smores?”

 

Minjeong hummed her affirmation, hugging her knees closer to her chest as she continued to watch Jimin’s attempts to burn the logs. Should she talk to her now? But she’s too occupied at the moment. Then again if not now then when? But--

 

“Can I ask you something?” Jimin suddenly asked, breaking into her thoughts.

 

Were they finally going to have the talk? Minjeong swallowed. “Y-Yeah?”

 

“Why’d you choose music?”

 

Ah.

 

Maybe not.

 

Minjeong cleared , trying to calm herself enough to remember the answer. “Well, I--I actually wanted to be a soldier at first.”

 

Jimin shot her an incredulous look. “What?”

 

Minjeong laughed at her reaction. “I wanted to be a soldier.” She repeated, “But when I was in high school, I was casted to be an idol and became a trainee.”

 

Jimin had stopped what she’s doing, giving her her full attention. “That’s how you met Ningning?”

 

“Yep. She’s younger than me but she’d been in that place for much longer than I had. We’ve been through tough times. Really tough times.” Her eyes glazed over, taking a trip down the memory lane. “Everything was rigorous--dancing, singing, all sorts of lessons, even the diet was painful. I guess that’s how we still stuck together even after I decided to quit and enter university. And that’s where I met Ms. Kim Aeri.”

 

A fond smile had played on her lips as she recalled the memories. Jimin’s watching her with so much interest it made her squirm. She cast her eyes down, picking at the duvet.

 

“I studied music production and technology and--well, one thing led to another and here I am now.”

 

Jimin blinked, realizing she was done talking, and pouted, “That’s it? But I want to hear how one thing led to another.”

 

“Maybe I’ll tell you when we got those smores you were talking about.”

 

That got Jimin setting off back to work, extra vigorous now, and lit a fire in no time. Marshmallows and sticks were taken out from her bag and they sat around the fire, mouth filled with sweet mushy goodness.

 

Jimin tried to make Minjeong tell her the rest of her story but the blonde just stuck outb her tongue.

 

“Not until I hear your story first.” Minjeong said. “How did you become an internet superstar?”

 

Jimin rolled her eyes at the exaggeration as though saying, what bull, “Well, I’ve been putting up song covers since I was young, way before the whole thing with my...ex blew up.”

 

“Yeah, I know. I saw every single one of them.”

 

Jimin groaned while Minjeong laughed. “Not a word, Kim Minjeong. Not a word.”

 

Minjeong’s still laughing. Teasing Jimin was fun. “Okay, okay. Not a word.”

 

The brunette nodded, appeased. “I wasn’t good or anything but for some reason the videos blew up.”

 

“That’s not true.” Minjeong interrupted, frowning now. She saw those videos. They were impressive for someone so young. And it was a bonus that Jimin had always been so pretty. “You did well in those videos. The people wouldn’t love you for nothing.”

 

Jimin smiled. “Thank you. Now if you’re done embarrassing me, I’m going to continue. Since then I’ve always been putting up content and making money. My parents let me manage my finances when I was old enough so when my...um, tiny act of rebellion happened, I didn’t have much trouble with my trips, though, of course, I still had a pretty tight budget.”

 

“What did you study back in college?”

 

“Majored in political science and a bit of psychology at the side.” Jimin answered, checking if her marshmallow was burnt enough. “I was about to take post-graduate studies but, well, as you already know, things happened.”

 

Minjeong tried to imagine Jimin in university. It wasn’t hard. A little stressed and a little unhinged maybe, as all university students were, but still a whole lot gorgeous. She remembered the girl’s lengthy commentaries about the sights in Paris and smiled to herself. She probably aced history.

 

“Your turn.” Jimin’s voice brought her out of her reveries. Jimin who’s here with her now--brave, independent, and strong.

 

It’s admirable.

 

Minjeong told her about how she started making music and how Aeri somehow got a hold of them (she had always been so meddlesome) and convinced Minjeong to join a local songwriting competition (she would rather say “forced” instead of “convinced” but she kind of owed her career to Aeri so she’ll let her have this one) which was where she received so many offers after winning the contest and since Minjeong had an aversion to socializing, Aeri took care of everything for her and since then became her self-proclaimed agent.

 

The talk went on even as they went hiking. Jimin was very engaged and Minjeong liked how she got to learn something about the girl--how she had a black belt in taekwondo and was part of her school’s swim team. Jimin even talked about how her classmates used to rub on her forehead for good luck which had Minjeong laughing her heart out, calling her a saint.

 

She liked how she learned more about Jimin, realizing there was so much more she didn’t know about her yet, but she didn’t know if she felt the same way about the undeniable tightening of their bond with each story they share.

 

It was frightening, but Minjeong couldn’t seem to have enough.

 

Yukon was the definition of a winter wonderland, even in March. Today, there was only a thin sheet of snow covering the ground and dusting the pine needles. Minjeong and Jimin stuck close to each other as they headed down from the mountain upon the blonde’s incessant complaints, shoulders bumping and arms brushing. A part of Minjeong expected Jimin to hold her hand, as was the girl’s usual tendency, but the brunette stuffed her hands in her pockets when their gloved knuckles touched.

 

At lunch, Jimin brought her to town, saying she knew just the perfect place. Minjeong smiled to herself. Of course she did.

 

It was a quaint restaurant with an interesting exterior (and interior, Minjeong found out the moment they stepped in). Klondike Rib & Salmon gave off a strong rustic vibe with the checkered tablecloths, simple monoblock chairs, and wooden floor housed in an old-fashioned A-Frame building. The ambiance was great. Homey. Especially with the delicious aroma of steak. Jimin still got it.

 

“Yizhuo got a pet gecko. She still has it now.” Minjeong was saying as they ate their food--Wild Smokey Balls with Sticky Sauce, fish and chips, and a bowl of chowder. Their trip to memory lane wasn’t quite over yet. “And its--is this appropriate to talk over food? Its poop smells so bad. Like, really bad it wakes us up at night.” She said anyway, laughing at Jimin’s wrinkled nose.

 

“What’s its name?”

 

Minjeong grinned. “Poop.”

 

Jimin put down her spoon and gave her a deadpan look as she threw her head back laughing.

 

“What? You asked!”

 

Shaking her head, Jimin resumed eating. “A gecko sounds cool though.”

 

“Yeah, until you smell--mmm!” Minjeong whined, lips pressed to silence by Jimin’s fingers. She swat her hand away. “Its poop!”

 

Jimin groaned and Minjeong stuck out her tongue.

 

They ordered bumbleberry pie for dessert, which Minjeong attacked with gusto. It was divine. Each slice melted in in a burst of flavors.

 

“You’re not filming.” She pointed out, having meant to talk about the absence of cameras way back when they were pitching the tent but finding no timing to bring it up.

 

Jimin just shrugged. “I wanted to focus on this trip.” she said but the way she looked at her said I wanted to focus on you instead.

 

Minjeong tried not to think about it.

 

Next on their agenda was dog sledding and Minjeong was well over herself with affection for the furries.

 

They gushed over the kennel dogs, vigorously focused on the detailed training session, and laughed as they were pulled through the snow, cold wind biting their faces. It was perfect. Nothing could ever top this, Minjeong had thought.

 

And, well, she shouldn’t really have underestimated Jimin that much.

 

Late in the afternoon, they returned to their camp, lazing around in their tent, keeping warm near the fire, and having more smores.

 

“Are we going to sleep out here?” Minjeong asked, already shivering at the idea.

 

Jimin snorted, “As if you would willingly go through that.”

 

Minjeong thought the entire tent agenda was useless but before she could say that aloud, Jimin beat her to it.

 

“From way back in the airplane, I’ve been thinking of things to do with you here in Yukon.” The girl started, the dancing flames of the bonfire reflecting in her eyes. “One of them was camping but you’re only staying for today so...yeah. But I still wanted to do it with you. I thought it would be fun and memorable. You know, pitching tents, making fire, eating smores…”

 

The soft expression on Jimin’s face made Minjeong feel like melting like the marshmallow on her stick. The brunette gave their trips so much thought and Minjeong couldn’t help but be guilty, feeling like she wasn’t appreciating her enough.

 

“And? Did it meet your expectations?”

 

Their eyes met and Minjeong thought Jimin looked beautiful in the firelight.

 

Jimin smiled, “Anything with you is fun and memorable.”

 

Minjeong averted her gaze, stuffing a smore into only to yelp, burning her tongue. Jimin was quick to hand her a bottle of water which she chugged like her life depended on it.

 

When it was getting dark, Jimin checked the time and said they should break camp.

 

“Are we done for today?” Minjeong asked as she rolled the rainfly.

 

“Oh, we’re still on our way to the main event.” Jimin gave her a wicked grin. “Say, do you have a swimsuit with you?”

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

Takhini Hot Pools was Jimin’s second favorite thing about Whitehorse. She always made sure to visit at least once a year so it was a no brainer that she would book a private pool this time to share with Minjeong.

 

Right now, blonde looked positively satisfied, submerged chin deep in the steaming water right across her with her eyes serenely closed as if she didn’t just dive underwater and grabbed Jimin’s ankle when she wasn’t looking. The girl had looked horrified when she asked if she brought a swimsuit and Jimin got a good laugh from it. She obviously didn’t and they resorted to buying one from the souvenir shop because Minjeong was so adamant that she wouldn’t borrow Jimin’s.

 

She watched the ripples her small movements made on the water, distorting the reflection of the night sky. It was quiet. Peaceful. Too peaceful. Like a calm before the storm.

 

Jimin took a deep breath and crouched lower, mirroring Minjeong’s stance and watched the clear, dark, and moonless sky, spotting the big dipper, little dipper, and Orion in the midst of a splash of hundreds of twinkling stars, waiting. For multiple things.

 

For the lights to appear.

 

For the bomb to drop.

 

For whether the guillotine would fall on her neck or not.

 

Her hands were cold despite the hot water. She glanced at Minjeong. The girl was already looking at her. She held her stare, and in the space of that moment, Jimin wished tomorrow would never come.

 

Tendrils of wet blonde hair clung to her face, droplets of water on her milky skin akin to the glistening morning dew that clung to flower petals. Her gaze traced every contour of her features from the soft curve of her cheeks, the roundness of her bright eyes, the slope of her nose, the plump curvature of her lips, staring so hard she could see an imprint of her behind her eyelids whenever she blinked.

 

“Have you ever brought someone here before?” Minjeong broke the ice, her question making Jimin look away.

 

“Yes.” She quietly admitted. “I brought her here once. You know. The ex. I wouldn’t have remembered though. If you didn’t ask. Just--just so you know.” she cleared , feeling a blush spread on her cheeks.

 

Minjeong hummed, standing taller now so the water reached only her chest, neck and collarbones and shoulders glistening. Jimin tried not to stare.

 

“Since we’re on the topic of exes, I think it’s about time I tell you about it.”

 

“You don’t have to if you don’t want--”

 

“But I do want to.” Minjeong interrupted, looking at her in the eye. “Unless you don’t.”

 

Jimin kept shut, swallowing. Minjeong took a deep breath and started to tell her everything.

 

How they met in winter, Los Angeles when Minjeong was taking up yet another course in sound engineering while at the same time releasing a hit song after another.

 

How they somehow became friends from a string of mutuals, spending a little time together, and then some, until it became more.

 

How during the next winter she had confessed to Minjeong at a beach in Malibu, icy tides soaking their shoes.

 

How they proceeded to happily spend the next two years together as a couple.

 

How in their second year’s winter, she had a job offer at New York. Minjeong was happy for her, urged her to take it.

 

How the distance and their respective busy schedules resulted in daily texts and calls reduced to thrice a week, twice, and then once, and then none at all.

 

And how in the same season of the following year, Minjeong had decided to drop by her apartment as a surprise only for it to backfire as she found someone else on her lover’s bed, someone else in her lover’s heart.

 

When she finished, heavy silence fell upon them. Minjeong was staring at the water and Jimin couldn’t take her eyes off her. She wanted to move closer and pull her into her arms. But she doubted Minjeong would appreciate it now.

 

Besides, the ball was still on Minjeong’s court and until she broke her silence regarding Jimin’s confession, they still stood at an impasse.

 

It was getting harder to stay positive as seconds tick by.

 

“So that’s why you hate winter.” She said after a while, hoping to lighten the mood.

 

Minjeong smiled bitterly. “Yeah, well,” she shrugged.

 

“Too bad it’s already trademarked, huh?”

 

Minjeong’s smile turned into a genuine grin. “Too bad it’s already trademarked.”

 

And then it happened. Right out of nowhere. When Jimin least expected it to.

 

It was like somebody had flicked a switch and the sky came alive, illuminated by ribbons of colorful swirling lights like celestial smoke dancing over from outer space. They were bright as fireworks but nothing can quite compare to its spellbinding beauty. Like spiritual dragons swirling in the sky, their glowing serpentine bodies tangling, untangling.

 

Takhini Hot Pools was Jimin’s second favorite thing about Whitehorse. The first would always be the magical aurora borealis.

 

“Wow.”

 

She glanced at Minjeong. The girl was awestruck, as expected--jaw agape, eyes wide and bright.

 

“I’ve--” Minjeong’s voice caught on something. “I’ve always wanted to see this.”

 

Jimin smiled, “Miss ma’am, I present to you today’s main event.” She said, voice hushed. “Aurora Borealis herself.”

 

She watched as Minjeong’s eyes darted around, trying to take in everything. “You didn’t mention this to me.”

 

“If I did, it wouldn’t be quite the surprise now, would it?”

 

“It’s beautiful, Jimin.” Minjeong breathed out.

 

“I did promise you.” Jimin said softly, as though in reverence. “The most beautiful view you’ll ever see in your entire life.”

 

Minjeong tore her eyes away from the phenomena unfolding before her to meet her gaze. The lights danced on her glistening skin, reflecting in her eyes. Jimin’s breath was caught in .

 

The most beautiful view indeed.

 

Maybe it’s the northern lights’ enchanting beauty. Maybe it was the hot spring water. Maybe it was the cold. Whatever it was, the moment felt right.

 

It’s time.

 

“Would you give me a chance,” Jimin started, swallowing as felt parched, voice coming out hoarse. “To make your winters special again?”

 

Her heart raced as Minjeong regarded her with an unreadable expression, squirming under her watchful gaze tracing every inch of her face as though trying to memorize it.

 

And then Minjeong smiled. Wistful. Sad.

 

A lone tear escaped her eye and the guillotine fell on Jimin’s neck.

 

“I…” her voice cracked. “I’m so sorry, Jimin.”

 

And as sudden as it came, the northern lights left and with it was all the hope in Jimin’s heart, leaving a pitch dark night behind.