Cherry blossoms made way for palm trees and the sun mercilessly beat down upon the inhabitants of the earth. In her travels, there’s always a year-round plan. Flexible, of course, but strictly followed unless changes are necessary.

 

This year, the plan was to spend summer in Maldives, go on a cruise, visit the safari in South Africa, backpacking in Southeast Asia... Spending the entire spring and early summer in Canada, however, wasn’t in the list.

 

Jimin never stayed in one country for more than a week. She was always on the move, eager to roam the face of the earth. But now she’s been stuck in a hotel room for months. At first she thought the thrill had died down. Then she realized it was just her trying to prove something, trying to make a point.

 

She can stay in one place just fine. Whether it be in Canada...or in Seoul.

 

“Are you sure about this?”

 

Jimin snapped out of her trance, tearing her eyes away from the windows of the kitchen to look at her host. Wendy Son was one of her close friends and seniors back in college, now a public defender. She was lucky the woman was in Toronto for a short vacation.

 

Jimin nodded, “It’s about time.”

 

Wendy watched her before sighing. “Well, alright. You’re a big girl. I’m sure you know what you’re doing. When do you plan to go?”

 

Jimin pursed her lips, watching the ice cubes melt in her glass. “Soon.”

 

“In short, you haven’t decided yet.” Wendy translated, shaking her head. “You can stay here in my place, you know. Heaven knows how much they’re charging you in those hotels.”

 

Jimin chuckled, “You know I can’t cook to save my life, unnie. Room service is a blessing.”

 

“I can bulk cook for you before I go.” Wendy offered. She was flying back to Korea the day after tomorrow. “It can probably last you a week. Hopefully, that would be enough time for you to collect your thoughts and decide.”

 

"I don’t want to bother you--”

 

“Please. I insist.”

 

Jimin smiled. Wendy had always been such an angel. “Thank you.”

 

They lapsed into silence for a while until Wendy got a call and excused herself. Jimin got up and washed their used glasses before retiring to the living room.

 

Her phone buzzed. It’s a message from Yeji.

 

“Hey, Jimin. You still at Toronto?”

 

Jimin briefly typed a response.

 

“I’m in Spain. But the S is silent.”

 

Wendy’s house was spacious and relaxing. There were a hundred rooms, her Sooyoung-unnie would often joke. Everything was painted in pastel earth colors, illuminated by natural sunlight pouring in from the wide glass windows that opened to a green lawn. Jimin sat on the beige velvet couch, idly rubbing the soles of her feet on the faux fur rug. From the corner, a turntable was playing a nostalgic 70s song.

 

Well, I can’t forget this evening

 

Or your face as you were leaving

 

But I guess that’s just the way the story goes

 

Resting her head back, Jimin stared at the cream tray ceilings, mind time travelling to three months ago.

 

You always smile

 

But in your eyes your sorrow shows

 

Yes, it shows

 

They didn’t stay long in the hot springs after that, sleeping in their respective beds in the hostel, backs turned to each other. Jimin had been wide awake, not expecting to be able to sleep. Not when there was a dull ache in her chest.

 

Yet she knew. She had always known it would happen. The heavy and sad stares Minjeong had been giving her the entire day when she didn’t think she was paying attention was a telling sign.

 

She should’ve known better than to cling to hope.

 

She remembered how quiet it was, how she could hear every sigh from the other bed, every restless rustle of sheets.

 

Minjeong’s voice broke the silence. “Jimin?” It was hushed, barely above a whisper yet it rang loudly in the tense stillness of their room.

 

Jimin swallowed and held her breath, afraid that Minjeong might hear the slightest exhale. Should she pretend to be asleep?

 

She chose not to reply and everything was quiet again. Did Minjeong fall asleep?

 

Then there was a sigh, long and drawn out. “Please don’t get me wrong.” She started to say. “I appreciate you a lot. I enjoy your company. And I--I do care about you.” her voice turned down, “Way more than you know.”

 

Jimin’s heart had started to rattle its rib cage by then.

 

Still, she remained silent.

 

“But the thing is,” she could hear her sharp intake of breath. “The thing is, relationships...they’re not that simple. I know you know that. It’s not just about feelings. It’s also about committing...trusting...compromising and I--I’ve thought about it and I don’t think either of us are ready to do that.

 

“And if--if things go bad...I don’t think I’ll be able to handle losing you and if worse comes to worst, hating you. I...I wouldn’t be able to handle you hating me.”

 

Jimin turned at that, finding Minjeong lying on her side, facing her. Cocooned in the thick sheets, her face was vague and shadowed but her eyes caught the moonlight that slipped between the gaps between the curtains. They were glistening, giving her that same heavy stare.

 

“I would never hate you.” She reassured her, soft yet vehement.

 

Minjeong had smiled, the way she did at the hot spring. “I bet you told her that too. Because I did.”

 

“I don’t hate her.” Jimin argued.

 

“Now you don’t. What about all those years ago?”

 

Jimin clenched her jaw. “I hated myself more.”

 

“And I don’t want that to happen again.”

 

Jimin watched as Minjeong sighed and moved to lie on her back, staring at the ceiling. “I’m scared of being in a long distance relationship. I have major trust issues.” she admitted. “You, on the other hand, don’t want to return and settle in Korea. I respect that. You travel a lot and meet many different people, possibly way more interesting than I ever will be. I don’t want to take that away from you. And I know for a fact that I’m not ready to commit to that kind of relationship again. If we start now...I don’t see the ending being pretty.

 

“Did you go all the way to New York to tell me this? That--That we’re not going to work out?”

 

“Yes. I wanted to give you closure.” Minjeong whispered, “This is all my fault. I...I shouldn’t have kissed you at the airport. I thought--I thought it would make you stay away but--” she sighed. “I’m so sorry, Jimin.”

 

She had not been able to find it in herself to speak. She hated that she was right, how every single point she made was spot on. She hated how her heart felt like it was running out of oxygen, slowly wilting away because for all the things Minjeong had told her that night, what she didn’t echoed the loudest.

 

I like you so much that I’m willing to let you go rang in the quiet spaces of her sentences, in every ached sigh and sharp inhale.

 

It occurred to her how much it pained Minjeong to say every single word, the effort she was making to keep her feelings safe, the measures she was willing to make to keep both of them from greater pain.

 

But why the did it hurt so much?

 

Jimin closed her eyes, letting tears flow freely.

 

That night, she had said nothing else other than a choked, it’s okay, I understand.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

“Let’s take a five minute break.”

 

Minjeong stepped away from the mic, taking off the headphones and letting it hang around her neck. She took a sip of water and twirled the pencil in her hand before scribbling adjustments on the paper before her.

 

“Can we listen to that part again? The pre-chorus.”

 

Music didn’t play. Instead, her colleague’s amused voice entered the booth. “We’re supposed to be taking a break, Minjeong.”

 

She gave her a deadpanned look. “This is me taking a break. Pre-chorus, please.”

 

“Minjeong, get out of there. There’s pizza out here.”

 

They engage in a staring match, Minjeong too stubborn to comply. Then the other woman waved a slice of pizza around. Minjeong’s stomach growled. Ugh. Humans and their mortal needs.

 

Minjeong didn’t miss Paris. At least not when she’s working. And so locked up in the recording studio she was, preferring to drown herself with work instead of moping around. Aeri had joked that she should get her heart broken more often because it made her twice as productive. Minjeong had told her to off.

 

“You’ve been working too hard.” her colleague, Jeon Soyeon, commented as she stepped out of the booth, plopped down on the couch, and grabbed a slice. “We’re just working on a demo, Minjeong. You make it seem like you’re about to release the song of the year.”

 

Minjeong raised a brow, taking a bite of her pizza. “Oh but we are about to do just that.”

 

The five minute break extended to fifteen. Surprisingly, Paris wasn’t haunting her yet. Chatting with Soyeon helped, as well as her little rule of not touching her phone when she’s working.

 

When she returned to the recording booth, headphones on her ears and a pencil in hand, she didn’t come out until the track was completed. They worked it for hours on end, critically going over every portion of the song, reviewing every intonation, refining every note. The clock had struck midnight when she’s high fiving Soyeon. The demo was finally ready.

 

“I have a little something so we can celebrate.” Soyeon said, a glint in her eyes as she went to take something from a cupboard near the couch. Minjeong checked her unread messages while she waited. There was nothing important save for Aeri reminding her of their early morning jog at Han River tomorrow.

 

“Ta-da!” Soyeon returned with a bottle of wine in hand, grinning wide.

 

Minjeong laughed. “I don’t think we’re allowed to drink here, unnie.”

 

“Then,” something in her eyes. Dark. Meaningful. Minjeong didn’t miss it. “Wanna come over to my place?”

 

Minjeong shrugged, smile easy. “Sure.”

 

She didn’t miss Paris. At least that’s what she tells herself all the time.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

At the crack of dawn, Minjeong woke up in an unfamiliar bed.

 

The soft material of the sheets that she had never seen before rubbed against her bare skin. A limp arm was draped over her torso and she refused to turn and see the face beneath the tangle of dark hair.

 

She blinked at the ceiling, trying to remember. She had been working on a demo in the recording studio for a girl group’s summer comeback when her co-producer who she was so sure was straight pulled out a bottle of wine. To unwind, she had said. One thing led to another and…

 

Minjeong closed her eyes and sighed. Back to this bull.

 

She carefully slid off the bed, put on her clothes, and walked out of the apartment.

 

Sitting in a cab, Minjeong watched the sun illuminate the sky. The driver the radio and cranked up the volume.

 

Well, you only need the light when it’s burning low

 

Only miss the sun when it starts to snow

 

Only know you love her when you let her go

 

Minjeong pulled out her phone, barely surviving with battery life less than 10%, venturing into the deep recesses of her camera roll, opening an album named OPEN FOR INSTANT PAIN ♥

 

True to its name, there was instant pain as she scrolled through throngs of memories--photos of every place they went to in Paris and every food they ate, selfies Jimin took without her permission, and goofy photos of them messing around.

 

Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low

 

Only hate the road when you’re missing home

 

She looked at the photos she took during the second day, when they were watching the sunrise in Trocadéro. It was different from the one she’s seeing now. Maybe the Parisian sunrise and Korean sunrise were different. Mostly, though, it was probably because of the company. Or the lack, thereof.

 

Only know you love her when you let her go

 

Staring at the candid photos of Jimin laughing, a hand raised to cover her face and eyes crinkling into crescents, hair tousled by the wind and sunrise dappled on her skin, she opened the camera and snapped a photo of the sky.

 

And you let her go

 

Saw this today and it reminded me of you, she typed without thinking but fortunately before she could send the message along with the attached picture, her phone ran out of battery and died.

 

When Jimin saw her off at the Whitehorse International Airport, the girl had successfully coerced her into promising that they keep in touch. No blocking each other, no switching numbers without letting the other know. But the last time they exchanged messages was three months ago with Jimin’s ‘Did you arrive safely?’ and Minjeong’s ‘Yes’.

 

It was already bright when she got to her apartment. She briefly greeted the guard on duty and rode the elevator up to her floor and when she entered her unit, Aeri was already there waiting and not looking very happy.

 

“What are you doing here?” she asked as soon as she got over her shock, kicking off her shoes and going straight to her bedroom to change.

 

Aeri followed, “You wore that yesterday. Where did you spend the night?” she sat on the edge of Minjeong’s bed, “We were supposed to go on a morning jog together today, remember?”

 

Minjeong paused halfway in putting on her shirt. So that’s why the girl was in her tracksuit. “. I completely forgot about that.” she groaned, pinching the bridge of her nose. “I’m so sorry, unnie.”

 

Aeri clicked her tongue, now lying on her back and messing with Minjeong’s immaculate covers. “So where did you spend the night?”

 

Minjeong continued dressing herself, facing the wall so Aeri wouldn’t see her grimace. “At the studio.”

 

“Yeah? Because I checked with the people there and they said you left early. With Soyeon-unnie.”

 

That made Minjeong pause again before sighing and resuming to button her pants, not bothering to answer. She didn’t have to anyway. Aeri already knows.

 

“That makes her, what, your twentieth one night stand this month?”

 

Minjeong snorted. “Stop exaggerating. And quit poking your nose into my life. Unless you want to be the twenty-first.”

 

Aeri wrinkled her nose. “Yuck.” she faked a gag. “A little heads up would be appreciated though. I woke up early for this, you know? Anyway, I’m proud of you, Minjeong. You’re finally listening to my advice! Get laid!”

 

Minjeong threw her used shirt to Aeri’s face but it didn’t stop her friend from laughing her out.

 

They spent the day in Minjeong’s living room, sprawled on the couch and watching movies. Aeri, unfortunately, had nothing to do for the day and didn’t seem to have plans on leaving. Yizhuo arrived at lunch with bags of takeouts in her hands. The girl just got her nails done and had no schedule for the rest of the day.

 

The movie marathon continued. Minjeong sat on the floor, hugging a throw pillow because Aeri and Yizhuo were hogging the couch and made it impossible to sit without crushing someone’s limb. They weren’t even watching, just playing with their phones.

 

“We’re watching American Sniper because of you for the nth time, unnie.” Yizhuo said when Minjeong complained. “Give us a break.”

 

When the credits rolled and the film was switched to Disney’s Raya, it was Minjeong’s turn to tinker around her phone, rolling her eyes as Aeri and Yizhuo debated on when Raya and Namaari were going to kiss.

 

“Maybe I should open a YouTube channel and post reaction videos.” Yizhuo pondered as Raya and her gang arrived at Spine.

 

“Ning Yizhuo vloggerist era!” Aeri exclaimed and Minjeong heard them exchanging high fives “Hey, maybe you can be Minjeong’s twenty-second then. She likes vloggers.”

 

Minjeong snorted, eventually bursting into laughter while Yizhuo just let out a confused ‘huh’, not privy to their new inside joke.

 

Aeri explained, “Earlier, we were talking about her life--”

 

“Shush, shush, shush. Look, they’re about to kiss.” Minjeong interrupted, pointing at the screen as swords clashed.

 

She liked this. Her friends never tiptoed around topics about and related to Jimin, though she had a tiny suspicion they were deliberately doing it to inflict pain.

 

When she told them what happened, they were dumbfounded at first. And then angry. And then they appeared at Minjeong’s doorstep, bringing bottles of alcohol. Her drunken self then explained the details and soon she wasn’t the only one crying.

 

In the television, an emotional scene came up and Minjeong could hear sniffles behind her. She would’ve turned and snapped a photo but her eyes felt misty herself so she ducked her head to her phone instead, hoping her friends wouldn’t catch on but damn why did Sisu have to die?

 

The device in her hand buzzed and a message notification popped up at the top of her screen as she fake scrolled through her Instagram feed. Minjeong paused, not even breathing.

 

Was she seeing this right?

 

Yoo Jimin: Hi.

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Wendy didn’t have to cook for her after all.

 

They sat beside each other on the plane, in the comforts of first class seats (because this was Wendy Son after all--youngest daughter of a business tycoon and no matter how down to earth the woman was, first-class flights were actually a downgrade from her usual private jet plane rides). It didn’t make anything less scary for Jimin. She clung on to Wendy’s arm the entire flight.

 

In the 11 hours of travelling, Jimin barely slept. Her mind was racing too much to give her enough peace. She drummed her fingers on her seat, thinking of how she had sent Minjeong a message prior to their flight. It went like:

 

“Hi.”

 

“Hi”

 

“Is this still your number?”

 

“Yeah.”

“What’s up?”

 

“Nothing much”

“Actually”

“Are you free this weekend?”

 

“I have time in the afternoon”

“Why?”

 

“I have something to tell you”

“Can we talk?”

“On Saturday, I mean”

“Not now”

 

And that’s where the conversation ended because Jimin had to go on airplane mode before Minjeong could reply and now she’s over herself with worry. What if she says no?

 

She’s not the only reason you’re doing this, she had to remind herself, the plan will go as it is.

 

“Hey.” Wendy nudged her. “Everything will be fine.”

 

“W-What do you mean, unnie?” Jimin tried to laugh but it sounded like a whimper.

 

“You’ve been wringing your hands nonstop. You have all the reasons to be worried, yes, but I suggest you save it for later. It’s only exhausting you now.”

 

Jimin nodded and took a deep breath, trying to expel the jitters.

 

“Do you have a place to stay?” Wendy asked, “If not then you can stay over in the meantime. I’m sure Sooyoung wouldn’t mind.”

 

Jimin winced. Sooyoung was a sweetheart but she was also a lot jealous and possessive which meant that yes, she would definitely mind.

 

“I’m going to crash over at Yeji’s.” Jimin declined.

 

“Okay. You have any plans?”

 

Jimin told her what she had in mind. Not everything--like getting a girl and trying to patch things up with family--only the part she knew Wendy would be interested in.

 

“That sounds solid.” Wendy said and her approval lifted a great portion of the weight on Jimin’s shoulders. Having Wendy Son agree with her means she’s actually doing something right with her life.

 

“I can make arrangements.” The older woman continued excitedly, “I think I still have Professor Jang’s number. She can definitely speed up the process. Or do you prefer Yonsei? Seulgi has connections there. Oh, what about--”

 

“Unnie,” Jimin cut her off, laughing. “You’re getting ahead of yourself.”

 

Wendy sheepishly grinned, “It’s just--I support you in this, Jimin. I’m so glad you’re going to go after your dreams after so long. Not everyone has the luxury, you know.”

 

“Yeah.” Jimin smiled, wistful. “I know.”

 

“What made you change your mind?”

 

Jimin pressed her lips together in contemplation. “Just… There’s someone.”

 

“I see.” A knowing look settled on Wendy’s features but she didn’t pry. “Well, if you ever need help, I’m only one call away.”

 

“Thanks. I’m so lucky I’m friends with the highest South Korean bar exam top-notcher.”

 

“That’s Joohyun-unnie. Not me.”

 

“Exactly. Who said I was talking about you?”

 

Wendy laughed, giving her a shove. “You are such a pest.”

 

Yeji was waiting for her at the airport. Unlike last time, Jimin let her know her flight details and asked to be picked up. Sooyoung was there too and after a bit of catching up and a lot of squeals and tight hugs, they bid goodbye and went their separate ways with promises to meet up sometime soon.

 

The entire ride to Yeji’s apartment was filled with the girl’s animated chatter about her cute floormate. She even threatened her that if she ever made moves on her future girlfriend, there would be war, which Jimin only rolled her eyes at.

 

She didn’t plan on staying with Yeji for too long. Just until she gets her own place. She will start looking for an apartment on Monday. One of her college friends was now a real estate agent and while that friend could be quite...suspicious, Jimin trusted her enough.

 

Yeji’s apartment wasn’t bad. It was big enough for two people and Yeji wasn’t quite the slob. She left Jimin to get settled in the guest bedroom where the latter organized her things while she charged her dead phone. As soon as it lit up, Jimin all but scrambled to check her messages and almost dropped the device. Minjeong had replied.

 

“Ok”

 

Jimin let out a breath of relief before bursting into a fit of giggles. It’s ridiculous how powerful a single, two-lettered message could be.

 

She finished arranging her things. It wasn’t much work since she opted not to unpack. She was more accustomed to that, after all. After pushing her luggage to the side and taking out her toiletries, a change of clothes, and her favorite pillow and yellow chick blanket, she was done and went to shower. That 11 hour flight was making her feel sticky.

 

Yeji had ordered lunch when she was done and they talked over Chinese takeouts that Jimin attacked with gusto. She missed this--leisurely sitting in her friend’s living room while feasting on black bean noodles, pickled radish, and dumplings while the television blared its noontime news. It felt like she’s back in the university dorms, ranting about silly things such as professors and projects.

 

At around three in the afternoon, long after they had finished their food, Jimin’s eyes were starting to feel heavy. The jet lag, exhaustion, and lack of sleep was taking a toll on her. Yeji noticed and laughed, saying she looked funny when she’s fighting back sleep, and told her to go to bed. Jimin didn’t even have the energy to make a retort.

 

She fell asleep as soon as she lay on the bed. Her dreams were turbulent. A hurricane of scenery from the glittering sapphire of the mediterannean sea to the rolling green hills of New Zealand, the luxury she left behind.

 

Somewhere deep in her subconscious, a worry lingered. Will she regret this?

 

 

 

 

***

 

 

 

 

Jimin ed up.

 

She ed up so bad.

 

Being used to jet lag and travelling had been something she took pride in. But that day, of all the days in her life, it failed her.

 

She slept since she hit the bed, slept even as her alarm shrieked the next day, and slept until nighttime came.

 

Jimin woke up at 9PM that weekend, effectively missing her supposed appointment with Minjeong, of all people.

 

.

 

The girl had only sent her one text earlier in the afternoon: “Jimin?”

 

Now she’s pacing in front of Minjeong’s workplace, staring at her phone and glancing at the door every time somebody walks out. People--mostly fans camped out in hopes of getting a glimpse of their idols--was starting to give her looks. Probably wondering who this weird girl was waiting for since she barely even batted an eyelid at the occasional celebrity sightings.

 

Ningning told her Minjeong was at work and gave her the address when she asked for it. The blonde was working on a girl group’s comeback and would clock off earlier than usual today because they were still at the early stages of recording.

 

Now, ‘early’ must have a whole new definition because it was already nearing 10:30 and Minjeong was still nowhere to be found. Also, just how late was ‘usual’ in their vocabulary when ‘early’ was even later than 10PM?

 

Just then, the smoked glass doors opened again and Jimin snapped her head to its direction, half hoping it to be Minjeong and half bracing herself to be disappointed.

 

It was Minjeong.

 

She looked different. Jimin almost didn’t recognize her if not for her white Yukon hoodie Jimin remembered buying for her when they went to the souvenir shop to get her a swimsuit. Her hair was no longer long and blonde. It was cut short into a bob, dyed back to its natural dark color.

 

She was laughing with someone Jimin barely registered, too taken by the sight of Minjeong’s laughter after so long.

 

Maybe it was because of Jimin’s shameless staring. Maybe Minjeong turned to look at the weird girl standing in front of their building like an idiot. Or perhaps it was destiny (that ed up prick).

 

Their eyes met.

 

Jimin held her breath. She’s still so beautiful.

 

Her finger twitched. She wanted to run and engulf her in a long overdue hug. But the way Minjeong’s smile melted made her stay rooted in her place. She reached up and took off her bucket hat instead.

 

Minjeong’s walking up to her, looking at her as though she couldn’t believe what she’s seeing.

 

“Yoo Jimin?”

 

Jimin let out a quiet sigh of relief. At least she still recognized her.

 

“H-Hey.” She replied, voice cracking and wobbling.

 

“Yoo Jimin?” Minjeong’s companion whose presence Jimin had long forgotten about chirped, giving her a look of fascination. “This is Yoo Jimin?”

 

Minjeong just frowned at the question. The woman continued on, this time addressing Jimin. “Minjeong says your name a lot in bed.”

 

“Unnie!” Minjeong shrieked, hitting her shoulder. Her face had turned as red as tomatoes. “Don’t listen to her. She doesn’t know what she’s talking about. She’s not-- We’re not-- I mean-- It’s not like that, I swear! Just--Soyeon-unnie please leave us alone.”

 

The woman--Soyeon-burst out laughing. “Alright, Minjeong, breathe. I’ll see you next week. And Jimin-ssi, it was nice meeting you.” She winked before finally walking away.

 

Jimin just looked at Minjeong who’s still obviously distressed. “Jimin, I--”

 

“Hey.” She cut her off with a smile. “You’re not obliged to explain anything to me.”

 

“But I don’t want you to get the wrong idea. We’re just colleagues. That’s all. It’s just that--one time we--”

 

“It’s okay.” Jimin interrupted. She didn’t really want to hear more. “I get it. Stop worrying.” she smoothened the crinkle of Minjeong’s brows with a finger. “Now, can we go somewhere private so we can talk?”

 

Minjeong offered to head to her office but suddenly decided against it so they went to a coffee shop around the corner instead. It felt surreal, walking down the streets of Seoul with Minjeong beside her looking very much unreal under the moonlight herself.

 

The cafe was almost empty, save for a couple of college students glaring at their laptops and typing furiously. After placing their order, they settled on a secluded table at the corner.

 

Jimin looked out the glass wall, intrigued while Minjeong checked her phone. Seoul had a distinct vibe that differed from all other cities she’s been to. Or maybe it’s just her blood singing to be finally home.

 

“I’m sorry I didn’t reply to your messages.” Minjeong spoke, bringing her attention back. “I don’t use my phone when I’m working and frankly, when you said you wanted to talk, I just assumed you meant, like, a phone call. I didn’t expect you’d actually be here.”

 

Jimin shook her head. “I should be the one apologizing.”

 

Minjeong raised a brow. “You already apologized enough.” She lifted her phone, showing Jimin’s flood of messages. “But...why are you here?”

 

There wasn’t any bite in her tone, just pure curiosity. Jimin was about to answer when the buzzer went off. She volunteered to get their drinks.

 

“Is everything okay?” Minjeong asked when she returned to her seat, concern evident in her gaze.

 

Jimin smiled, “Yeah. Nothing’s wrong, don’t worry.”

 

Minjeong nodded, contemplatively stirring her drink with its straw. “When are you leaving?”

 

“It’s not even an hour since we saw each other again and you’re already making me leave?”

 

“That’s not--I was only asking!”

 

Jimin laughed, all remnants of tension ebbing away. It’s just so easy with Minjeong. “Well, news flash: I’m here to stay.”

 

Minjeong’s straw paused in its laps, opening and closing. Jimin sipped on her strawberry milkshake while she patiently waited for her to gather her wits.

 

“You’re--You’re staying?”

 

“Indefinitely.”

 

“Here? In Seoul?”

 

“Nowhere else I’d rather be.”

 

“But...w-why?”

 

Jimin laces her fingers together, watching droplets trickle down the surface of her glass. “I’ve been thinking about it long and hard for the past three months and I--well, I think it’s time I face my family.”

 

Minjeong nodded, gaze sympathetic and understanding. “What about your travel vlogs?”

 

“I’ve already put it to a pause for a while now.”

 

“Then what are you going to do here?”

 

“I’m thinking of going through my initial plan. I’m going to start law school at SNU.”

 

Minjeong choked on her frappe. “Law school?” She exclaimed, “At SNU?”

 

“Yeah. Why?”

 

Minjeong stared at her as if putting two and two together and then started chuckling, shaking her head. “You’re so full of surprises, you know that? What can you not do?”

 

Make you mine, apparently, she almost blurted but she settled on smiling and continuing to sip her drink, swallowing the words along with it.

 

“Is that all you wanted to say?” Minjeong asked after a while. Jimin met her gaze and saw the underlying question there.

 

But it wasn’t time. She wanted to become a better person and resolve her family issues first. She had to discard her own baggage so she could help Minjeong with hers. Jimin wanted to prove herself, to make Minjeong feel and believe that she wasn’t about to go anywhere. Not without her.

 

It didn’t matter how long it would take. Every second spent with Minjeong would be worth her while.

 

Right now, sitting with her like this at a coffee shop in the middle of the night, Jimin felt content.

 

So instead of giving Minjeong a proper answer, Jimin just smiled meaningfully behind her glass. “I called you because I wanted you to know about everything. Before anyone else.” she said, hoping Minjeong would get the message.

 

It's still you. Even after all this time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

chapter 9 songs for context:

Without You - Harry Nilsson

Let Her Go - Passenger