Chapter 1: So start off, there where many questions such as the true nature of Chaewon’s role in this universe, the deaths of clones and how technology truly had a role in this universe.
Sci fi isn't something one can pull off easily but I think by far, you have pulled it off in a way that I am able to enjoy it at a slow pace but just enough tension to keep me wanting more in the next scene so good job!!
However, I feel like you could have given more emotions in the buildup of Hitomi’s and Chaewon’s relationship but the little fluff scene was enough to bring joy.
Now about the different personas of Hitomi, I like the way that you had Chaewon changing outfits on match the atmosphere and I especially favour the artist Hitomi scene and I have to hand it you. You built up the scene well for me to understand that art is something crucial to Hitomi. Though the other personas were given, I feel like it could have been developed more in the emotional aspect. Try and put urself in Chaewon’s perspective to see how you view that persona accordingly and develop on it.
Then we have the little flashbacks and the subtle foreshadowing which truly made me do a double take.
Then the ending, the tape to fix all the gaps in this universe. The use of technology is truly defined and being put to test. This is definitely an out of the box moment since the idea of technology being used to treat a person's health.
Once again, thank you for writing this wonderful ssambbang au :>
Chapter 2: Omg. I finally had the chance to read this one! The story is cute and it's my first time to read a squint of sci-fi genré. I like the idea of having Chaewon's character to search for clones with Hi-MI's on their names bec of hiichan. I fet bad for Hii bec of her adoptive parents seem to be faking it when their parent met. It shooked me out when i found out it was them. All in all nice concept of story!
Chapter 1: I didn't have the chance to leave comments during SSBB Bakery, my apologies. But as this is my nth read and I'm quite free as of moment, I'll do just that.
During the first paragraphs i was... well, confused. The thought persist even after I've read it for the nth time already. Thought that Chaewon was some sort of sick hitman who kill anyone with syringe as her weapon of choice, of all cool weapons! . I really scoffed at that part and scanned a little bit, but pushed on, as the writing is great and it's definitely worth my time.
As the story progressed I feel like I slowly understood but actually no LOL. Only then after the revelation i was so mind-blown. The way you dropped the bomb was so :chefskissu: I applaud you for that.
I really like Hiichan's other personalities . You wrote them amazingly well! I especially love Hifumi cuz BADASS HIICHAN WHO WOULDNT LIKE HER?! but the second one, is perhaps had the most oof. Well, my opinion anyways.
Thank you for writing and participating on the SSBB Bakery! The fact that this entry is the first one really puts my standard soaring high XD Also thank you for the great and enjoyable writing! Hope to see more ssambbang works from you <3
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